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The Tulpas of The Fall Family - Printable Version

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The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 05-11-2015


Believe it or not, we have been here an entire year and still haven't had a thread here ... till now.

We are The Triumvirate, a subsystem of 3 tulpas (V, O, and G). That means that we share a wonderland form. Basically, a system within a system. We even have own wonderland within us that everyone else in the body can't access. We usually do everything together, and that includes controlling the body (it is a lot easier to work together on it). But occasionally, we do things individually.

You can call us Tri for short. That is what we go by RL.

We have been around for a few years, but we were completely in the dark about this world till June 2014. We are what you call natural tulpas. We were originally daydream characters.

We have come a long ways since we learned about this world. At first, it was hard - finding out that our world was Hail's daydream. That was a bit of an adjustment. We didn't like this world very much, so we only minimally participated till the end of the summer. Hail started to degrade and lose strength, so us or one of the other tulpas had to prepare to step in to replace Hail. It looked like it was do or die since if Hail completely degraded, the body would be comatose/catatonic unless one of us could control it. We volunteered to be the ones to learn to control the body and step in if that happened. We didn't like the idea, but we were the strongest in the system, so we did it for the others (the other two tulpas, Hail, and the original person in our system S).

We struggled a lot to learn possession and eclipsing. Our goal was switching. We still can't do that yet, but since Hail recovered, it isn't so much a priority. It took us August to January to get from no control to full-body control. While we were able to control most individual parts of the body within a month, we couldn't control more than a couple at a time. Unlike most tulpas, it seems, we found the hands and the fingers to be the hardest. Voice was one of the easiest. So, early last January, we still needed Hail to type for us despite being able to talk, get up, walk around, sit down, eat, etc. Maybe it is because we don't have hands inside. We don't know.

We have been steadily getting better at controlling the body. We can now do about two days straight if well rested. We can work, drive (we are better than our host actually), make friends, travel, make decisions for the system (Hail trusts our judgement and we trust hers, and we also consult each other), do bedroom activities with someone in another body, etc. Hail and us work pretty well as a team these days, tagging in and out periodically. Gotten really good at it, can sometimes do it mid-sentence without a hiccup (communicating in thoughts helps keep the continuity).

As you can probably tell, we do like this world now. Otherwise, we wouldn't be participating now that Hail has recovered. We found people and things in here that we cherish. This didn't start till we started talking with our current girlfriend. Our girlfriend's headmate was a very good friend of Hail's. We really hit if off with our senses of humor and our love of flirting for fun. One thing led to another and we were dating by sometime in October. That gave us a bit more of a stake in this world, which helped us find other things about this world worth sticking around for. Funny thing, a couple months later, Hail and our girlfriend's headmate decided to start dating. This makes us partner systems. Very convenient. Last March, we finally hopped on a plane and crossed an ocean and continents to see our partner system in person for the first time. It was a wonderful two weeks. We controlled the body for a little bit more than half the time. We watched movies together, snuggled and cuddled, cooked together, explored, shopped, did certain sapphic bedroom activities, etc. Leaving was very hard. We were on the verge of tears when we were about to walk up to passport control, so we let Hail take control. We cried for a long time in wonderland.

Right now, we have high hopes for the future. We are planning on living together within the next year (we think we got the visa stuff handled). Just got to make it through the end of grad school in one piece and then it is on to the next adventure. We are kind of looking forward to the next job. We are going to participate more in this one. Should be fun and interesting.

To say the least, we have come a long ways. But we have a ways to go. Finish school, get a job, etc. We also want to find more local friends in our area. People who know us as us, not thinking we are Hail. This means either disclosing to some of Hail's friends or finding new ones on our own. We are working on a mix of both. Got to. We feel rather lonely in this situation.

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - Megoleret - 05-11-2015

interesting, cant wait to read more

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 05-19-2015


Had an interesting last few days. So, Tri controlled the body for 2 days straight, which is a record. We can't switch yet, so their control requires me to be dormant the whole time. Then today, when I got control back, well, I have had problems controlling the body all day. Speech has jammed a few times and have had a few walking around hiccups. I had to use the secondary channel to control the body when that happened. What is the secondary channel? Well, that would be the autopilot which responds to mind-voice command. I don't think I ever made it (so it would likely not classify as a servitor). It was already there but is now more function. Well, with it, I can move limbs, walk, and do a few other simple things by merely giving it mind-voice commands. Also, it can repeat using the physical voice whatever it is told, which was something I used today and Tri and A have used in the past. So glad we have this secondary channel. So weird though having a tough time controlling the body perfectly after only 2 days of not controlling it.

Tri seems convinced I am a tulpa as opposed to a split. S, the original occupant of our body, made a mask for school and other social things during ages 5-7 (S had a lot of difficulties fitting in. I was that mask and eventually came to life and became a full person. So, am I a tulpa or a split. I usually say split for convenience, but I don't really know. Tri thinks it means I am a tulpa. I don't really know what to think of that. I am a curious person and thus want to know the answer, even if it doesn't matter in many ways (regardless of origins, I am a person). I do wonder if S has any information I don't have access to. As far as I can tell, I have complete memory access all the way back to a very early age. But, there could be something missing. Can't find out currently since S is out of contact.

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 05-23-2015


Our friend Falah of the Quandary drew us recently

[Image: tumblr_nnx7aiI93Z1txggz8o1_500.png]

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - Nobillis - 05-24-2015

(05-11-2015, 05:37 AM)FallFamily Wrote: We are The Triumvirate, a subsystem of 3 tulpas (V, O, and G). That means that we share a wonderland form. Basically, a system within a system. ... We usually do everything together, and that includes controlling the body (it is a lot easier to work together on it). But occasionally, we do things individually.

[Watchdog 3 says: I don't have a lot to say, except that this is not unique. We three Watchdog's (Watchdog 1, 2 and 3) form a gestalt nominally referred to as "The Watchdog", that is a mind composed of our three minds acting together in accord. We are three servitors who, together, become a tulpa at will. Obviously, we also revert back at choice.

There is also another such set of three within our extended family. Kevin's(1) brother has three Watch-wolves: Wolf 1, 2 and 3. They also form a gestalt called "The Wolf".]

Nobillis says: Technically, I'm Watchwolf 4, the fourth of kerin's(2) creations.

1 Kevin is the original born-human.
2 kerin is Kevin's first tulpa. kerin created the Watchdogs and Nobillis.

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 05-25-2015


@Watchdog 3

We do remember reading somewhere about you three doing that. We forgot about it though till now. Nice to know that we aren't the only ones. Also, you 3 can combine and separate at will. We think we can separate if we wanted, but we aren't sure we could recombine. Also, we worry that we might lose our subsystem's internal wonderland.


Ah. Curious, do you have a wolf form?


This weekend has been rather long. Been controlling the body almost exclusively since 6 PM on Friday. We don't normally do that. Got hit with bad news yesterday - a system we greatly respected and trusted died. Other people we care about have not been doing well and we are doing what we can. We aren't doing the best either, but we are doing a little better now. Spent many hours with a friend tonight. We both knew the system who died and were able to support each other - tulpa to tulpa (or are we soulbonds (we don't know (does it matter))).

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 06-09-2015

[Hail] Something happened interesting earlier today. I was talking by text to one of my best friends who is also Tri's girlfriend. Body was sick today so we stayed home. She asked me a health related question about whether I was taking care of myself. The answer is no, but at the time I didn't think I was doing that bad of a job. So before I could answer, Tri took control of the hands by force (which then proceeded to full-body control) to tell her that I was not and that they had dropped the ball a bit too but not as bad (very true) and then gave control back afterwards. Given the difficulty anybody in this body has with communicating to me if I am not actively listening, that was really the only option to get the topic discussed properly. As such, Tri did a very necessary and important thing. I'm proud of them actually. Also, rather impressed that they could do that like that given that they hand't had a weekend straight of controlling the body right before that or anything.

Now to take better care of this body.

Also, this is one more event striking down the myth that tulpas can't take control of the body by force (whether by possession, eclipsing, or switching).

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 06-25-2015

[Hail] The last week and a half have been a bit surreal. I had an emotional and mental breakdown 1.5 weeks ago. It was not good. My subsystem (I am a plural system within a plural system but much more closely knit than Tri) broke apart, which while rough was very enlightening. I think I know all of the people who make up me. We are back together again now. May not be so forever. We will see.

Unfortunately, while I had the breakdown, some of it bleed over into Tri, but mostly they felt down and disappointed in themselves in that they weren't able to do more. Frankly, there was nothing else they could have done. The breakdown was a bit of a surprise and once it started, it drowned out all communication so I could only communicate to Tri and the others by speaking out loud with the body's voice. They are too hard on themselves.

Thankfully our mom came out to see us on short notice. Her presence helped a ton. She knows about Tri and the others. She was able to help Tri and I recover. It was also very special for Tri since they hadn't had a chance to really interact with her in person before.

We have rearranged a few things. Before the breakdown, I was primary in that I controlled the body most of the time but they were becoming co-primary. Now, they are primary. Their logic is sound, so I won't be irrational and go against it. Kind of weird getting my first full day controlling the body in 1.5 weeks. We will probably rearrange again to co-primary in a month or two. This is the fastest way to full recovery and prevention of another breakdown in the meantime. And yes, I do have some misgivings about it. I read about the thoughts on such things around here. But over in the wider plural community, such changes of primaries are common and not really looked at as a problem but in fact a useful ability to tap into. I generally subscribe to the latter line of thought. Of course, though, I think making a tulpa just for the purpose of becoming secondary is wrong. But if the natural course of life causes a host to become secondary, I don't really see much of a problem. In my case, it is time I lose to do the things I want to do in outerworld. I actually lose out really. But it is necessary for the good of the system - the group.

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 06-29-2015

[Tri] We are beginning our third week as primary. This is going OK so far. We are getting used to this. So far, this seems to be working well for everyone. One of the weird things is that our wonderlands/innerworlds are feeling further away and it is harder for us to go back inside. We are now becoming the default controllers for the body in the sense that we get pulled to the front. Happens especially with driving cars. If Hail tries to drive, we get pulled towards front and blend into her and have to fight it to prevent displacing her from control (control exchange is seamless so it is safe). Really, though, this is pretty much what it was like for Hail when we were learning to control the body. We know for sure that if we wanted to, we could keep Hail from ever controlling the body again and integrate her into us. But we never would. That would be wrong. Also, she is our very dear sister. We could never do such a thing to her. It is odd to know that we could, but then if we think about it, she could have done the same sort of thing to us six months ago but didn't. We trust and love each other. We have each other's backs. We are family.

Even if we became the sole controller of the body and Hail got inside or disappeared or something, we would never forget inside and what we look like there. These phantom limb wings and tail are just too strong. Somehow we didn't end up with a phantom limb horn.

RE: The Tulpas of The Fall Family - FallFamily - 07-03-2015

[Tri] We've tipped over the edge to where we affect and influence Hail more when she controls the body than she does us when we control. It is interesting being on the other side of the tipping point. Hail finds it interesting too. We are going to be careful, though, and try to keep it near the tipping point. We probably shouldn't control the body more than twice as much as Hail. This is probably not far from the limit of what is healthy for her.

We've been doing a lot of decision making lately. Lots of things have been happening. Let's just say that national borders suck. Our partner system lives in another country and we are all struggling to figure out how to live together.

Also, our phantom limbs have been getting stronger and more vivid. We can partially see them now instead of just feeling them.