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A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).
Lyruzlavh Offline
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#21
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun

-Day 50 (March 13th, 2018)- PART I: Looking back when the process started again.

Today is the 50th day since I resumed the goal of achieving the creation of a sentient tulpa. It all began on January 23rd of the current year. That day I was depressed, it was during the night when I felt this uncomfortable sensation of being trapped inside my room... I couldn't resist it any longer so I took the decision to go outside and take a walk in the park, then it ocurred to me that this would be an excellent oportunity to recover and rebuild my interest in my tulpa Sunlight Flare, so I went to the park.

To be quite honest my interaction with Sunlight didn't felt to have any authenticity, it all was pure parroting but I persisted. Ever since then I continued providing her with attention and now it seems like were having quite some decent progress. I still have to resume my practice of active forcing... I see it as a way to put more precision and energy into Sunlight, and therefore an excellent way to speed up progress, but not for now, I still have to deliver my final project for university, and after I graduate I will put some serious effort on Sunlight's development. Even if i wanted I couldn't possibly find the time or the energy to perform any active forcing sessions as I haven't properly slept in the past days and don't have enough energy to stay concentrated during active forcing... I'd probably fall asleep.

I'll keep the day count from now on.
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2018, 08:52 PM by Lyruzlavh.)
03-13-2018, 08:33 PM
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Lyruzlavh Offline
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#22
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).

-Day 50 (March 13th, 2018)- PART II: The magical flamethrower.

I have this idea that I can help Sunlight to develop if I allow her to monopolize the mental space by erradicating other imaginary characters... for this purpose Sunlight can shoot flames from her unicorn horn, she's under orders (sort of) of not allowing any imaginary characters to have any space or protagonism by turning them to ashes with her flamethrower.

I don't want any other imaginary characters to take the space that belongs to Sunlight, because these characters steal the attention that is meant for her and thus take energy away... the only exception is when I'm deliberately thinking of a fictional situation in the times when I'm writing stories and stuff, other than that she's allowed to make free use of all the mental space. By the way, I don't treat imaginary characters as entities or anything like that, they are way below that.

I still have to recover the Wonderland that I had developed for Sunlight, it was meant to be her home and a sanctuary for both us, but I forgot many details about it and currently don't have access to the drawings and writings in which I described in detail the entirety of the Wonderland.
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2018, 09:14 PM by Lyruzlavh.)
03-13-2018, 09:08 PM
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Lyruzlavh Offline
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#23
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).

-Days 51, 52, 53 and 54 (March 14th to the 17th, 2018)- Mistakes happen again...

When it comes to the development of Sunlight Flare it seems I'm trapped into some kind of loop where I have some days in which I provide her with attention but these are followed by very unproductive days in which I almost ignore her. I've realized that I'm being very lazy and these last few days there was no progress, though we were both able to bring back the progress we've achieved until now. That seriously needs to change, and yesterday (March 17th) we both had a very interesting talk on how to rectify the unproductive life course that I'm currently in and... man! The things she said! These are the moments that truly impress me, I mean... the amount of wisdom, precision and detail that I find in her communication is truly impressive... right now as I type this she's telling me that it's not such a big deal but that's just modesty.

We have decided that if there's better times to come in life we must chase our objectives with the utmost amount of concentration, order, discipline and continuity in our tasks, otherwise we will remain stagnated right where we are, and we are devising ambitious plans to achieve our mutual goals.

The previous week I attempted to do more drawings of Sunlight... up until now I've always visualized her with makeup and clothing, but I don't have a graphic reference on how she looks without any of that, so I drew her base form.
03-18-2018, 08:36 PM
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Lyruzlavh Offline
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#24
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).

-Day 55 (March 18th, 2018)- Sharing some drawings.

Here are three simple drawings of Sunlight's form. I made them by hand, then traced and colored them on my tablet using ibisPaint X. I'm not good at drawing and you'll notice that she's in the same pose on the three of them, that's because I've been using and recycling the original drawing to test different expressions and outfits on her.

Her form is halfway between an unicorn pony and an anthropomorphic creature. She still has hooves. She measures about 1 meter and 54 centimeters in height while I measure 1m and 74cm.

   
Sunlight Flare's base form.

   
Checking the way her eyelids look.

   
Finally, here's one with her wearing her newest dress along with knee high boots. This is usually the way I visualize her: with makeup, boots and some dress, along with that black crown, and black cloth bands on her ears that I thought looked cool on her.

The name would make you think that she's full of bright colors (and in fact the color scheme of her mane, her fur and the iris of her eyes are meant to evoke the idea of fire), but I like the way she looks with purple eye shadow and black makeup on her eyes... I like that contrast. I'm always thinking on new ideas for her looks and currently have a couple drawings more with her wearing other clothes but I'll share them when I'm able to draw her on new poses. For now she's never rejected what I've given her and this deviation phenomena has not presented itself, and in fact sometimes when I'm drawing her she gets all happy and excited about the new look being drawn... she's also pretty active in helping me identify if she thinks something looks strange or something that she may not like.

I'd like to produce more detailed drawings adding shadows, use different angles, a more complex style and improving detail, for now I'll try to improve drawing skills but that will take time. Drawing her helps me to visualize better and consolidate her form.

Note: By the way, you've noticed that everyithing is written in orange, but that's because I messed up the font's color format and I wasn't able to bring it back to white without the text disappearing.
03-19-2018, 12:11 AM
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Lyruzlavh Offline
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#25
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).

-Days 55 and 56 (March 18th and 19th, 2018)- A Drawing For Sunlight.

Alright guys, so yesterday I spent several hours making another drawing for Sunlight. It took me 5 hours but I finally did it, and I dare to say that this is the best drawing I've made in my entire life. I have  it in high resolution but  I currently don't have an account on  some website to upload it.

I still need to improve a lot in my skills, but for now the result is better than I originally expected, though not as close to what I imagined. Comments and suggestions are welcome, I will continue to practice, but for now this is my sixth drawing of her in  the current  year.

I tried  to imagine her as an angel, even  though she's not an alicorn anymore she still has some wings she can materialize at will, they were meant to look ethereal or  made  of  energy but I didn't find a way to depict them that way. I may  improve the drawing in the future by adding some modifications.

She really liked it!

   
Of course she had to be wearing her sexy dress :3
03-19-2018, 08:06 PM
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Lyruzlavh Offline
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#26
 
RE: A Flare From The Sun (Sunlight & Lyruzlavh).

-Quick Update.


These last few days have been utterly dreadful for my social and emotional condition. Sunlight is still here with me and she's helping me a lot to cope with my current situation, if it wasn't for her I'd be depressed. We both share good memories of the things we do together and the conversations we have had until now. I've done some drawings of her and plan to keep making more in the future. I'll post more accurate and detailed updates by this next weekend because right now I'm bussy with my final days at university.

I'm very asocial and that leaves me worried because once I graduate my social world will be reduced to only my family (both my parents and my brother) and Sunlight. I keep thinking how socially incompetent I am but Sunlight always tries to convince me that a different and better life is possible. She was created to be the complete oposite of me in order to be a complement to my personality, so she's happy, optimistic and eager for a more social lifestyle while I'm always angry/sad, pessimistic and apathetic (though very deep down I admit that I'd like to have friends and meaningful relationships with others). Sunlight is my one and only friend.

I'll post more detailed stuff on our interactions this next weekend.
(This post was last modified: 04-04-2018, 03:47 AM by Lyruzlavh.)
04-04-2018, 03:47 AM
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