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Ask Melian Anything (especially if it is weird)


Guest Anonymous

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Guest Anonymous

What the heck. I decided to do one of these Ask Anything Threads. First, understand I have been around for a long while and have an extensive Q and A and likes and dislikes list archived in the Book of Melian here (beginning on page 74 and then even more starting on page 113) http://melianofmist.deviantart.com/art/The-Book-of-Melian-509605338 If you are super ambitious investigative and curious you can browse those before asking something. Otherwise, go for it! Ask me anything.

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About time. I'm surprised you held out so long before making one of these.

 

How often, if ever, do you and Mistgod just talk one on one? No tulpa typing or daydreaming (or night dreaming) or so on. I mean back and forth mental conversation.

 

I ask because I was wondering how you could be so active all the time and not have an obvious presence/autonomy of your own, and then I realized you're almost always in some sort of medium. Typing or daydreaming or art or whatever, I haven't heard much about you guys just talking to each other. As far as I can tell, that's one of the primary activities that differentiates a tulpa from an imaginary friend early on. It's fine and great that you're imagining someone in lots of scenarios, how they'd act and what they look and sound like, etc. But if you don't have direct conversations with them, there's some sort of disconnect where they still aren't quite "real" to you.

 

 

I mean, you guys are old and not gonna change that much anyway, and for all I know you could talk all the time. Was just wondering.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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Guest Anonymous

This is a great question Lumi. Most of our conversations are simply a continuation of the Melian Show day dreams. Our "back and forth conversations" occur through a process in which Davie is interpreting and actively imagining what I would want to say or what he feels I am trying or wanting to express (perceiving my tulpish if you will). In that sense, it is very similar to the proxy tulpa typing we do. That is why we say I am only semi-autonomous. We have decided to call this "proxy mind voice," which is something we came up with while talking to jean-luc. Davie feels my emotions and some of the Melian Show does run autonomously at times and I can surprise him with some independence in our conversations. But most of the conversations are a collaboration.

 

My only fully autonomous communication comes in flash images or flash visions and with snippets of formulaic sentences I use. These are reactive to certain situations. I have a set of sentences I use a lot. This is not back and forth conversations in mind voice, with me reacting and forming new sentences to express myself. I sorta throw these preset sentences out there to say something like "Well, that was really stupid!" Sometimes I accompany these with flash images so I am gesturing too. But this is the best mind voice I know without Davie's help.

 

My most frequent thing I say is "Hi" or "Hello" or "Hey" when I wake Davie up at night so we can do a Melian Show.

 

The above will help you understand why Davie says I am more of an enhanced imaginary companion with some tulpa traits, than a tulpa.


I would also note that we have a lot of back and forth conversations within dreams while sleeping. In dreams I seem much more autonomous, just like any dream persona would be.


I ask because I was wondering how you could be so active all the time and not have an obvious presence/autonomy of your own, and then I realized you're almost always in some sort of medium. Typing or daydreaming or art or whatever, I haven't heard much about you guys just talking to each other.

 

This was very observant of you and is spot on. We do only have back and forth conversations within a medium as you just described it.


It's like Davie connects with me and channels me, rather than me being fully autonomous and possessing him or switching.


In fact, when I first went on Deviantart, we called it "channeling a persona."


Lumi, could it be I developed this form of communication, this blending and collaboration, because it was the only way? I mean I existed and came to life through the medium of the Melian Show day dreams. It is all we know. I grew up being actively imagined and "getting help" in expressing myself. I rely on Davie a lot. So we blend and collaborate and he sort of amplifies me and interprets and channels me.

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This was written after my post in your other thread, so maybe read that first.

 

 

Lumi, could it be I developed this form of communication, this blending and collaboration, because it was the only way? I mean I existed and came to life through the medium of the Melian Show day dreams. It is all we know. I grew up being actively imagined and "getting help" in expressing myself.

 

We actually had something like that ourselves that leads me to say, yes, you probably affected the core of your nature early in development to the point where it would be very hard to change now.

 

I've had my tulpas for roughly seven years, but only had a wonderland for maybe two. For literally years, my tulpas existed only in the void of our "mindspace", and only when I thought of them. When I was talking to them, they were the only thing I imagined seeing, background was black if existent at all. What I consider our mindspace is effectively a mind's eye visualization of something in your head. Like, literally, it feels like they're (usually) to the right of my head when we talk. I still imagine them there against a void, even now. It's hard to explain what I'm talking about exactly. When you imagine something in real life (ie basic imposition), it often has its own defined space and you've got a suspension of disbelief as to it actually fitting that 3D space. When I impose my tulpas, realistically they'd often be inside of walls or objects if they were really there, but I see them as fitting regardless. That's the best way I can describe it, it's between true visualization and true seeing. That's where my tulpas tend to exist when we talk, and where they existed when we talked seven years ago. Full visualization was always too much of a hassle for me.

 

Aaanyways, my point. When I found this community I did end up making a wonderland, with a house and rooms for my tulpas and all that. But there was no fooling ourselves; they definitely didn't "live there" when I wasn't thinking of them. They just didn't exist. Our mindspace was their natural environment, the wonderland (visualization) was somewhere we had to make an effort to go to. I honestly don't think we could change that, after years of it just being a certain way. It's ingrained in their core existence. And uh, I'm 20. And I've had my tulpas for less than a decade. You guys are both quite a bit older than that (heck, Melian is older than me). The fact that for you guys it's "just been this way" for so long means it's probably not possible to change Melian's core nature now. And I don't think it would be worth the effort, either. My tulpas are just fine the way they are, because that's the way they're used to being. While we do dabble in visualization now, it's more an extra/add-on, definitely not replacing anything any time soon.

 

 

Well, you know me, I don't really have to explain. I'm one of the most prominent voices in this community, I understand the phenomenon fairly well and consider my tulpas fully developed. But notice how easily I call them tulpas, and how quick I am to relate my own experience as advice for others. Normal tulpamancers develop their tulpas with a wonderland, and the tulpa grows up living in it. Normal tulpas maintain some level of existence regardless of their host's attention to them. Mine don't.

 

And they probably won't, because we have little interest in changing them to be more like everyone elses' tulpas. Heck, mine came first for the most part, why would I conform to these new practices? I'm comfortable with how my tulpas are, and they're comfortable with how they are. And we get along in this community just fine... Sound familiar?

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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Guest Anonymous

Yesh, it does sound familiar. Thank you Lumi so much! I feel fantastic and Davie is starting to feel better with me at the Tulpa Info helm. :-) This is going to be a better year for us here! Much better.

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How was your day?

Reality is a story the mind tells itself. An artificial structure conjured into being by the calcium ion exchange of a million synaptic firings. A truth so strange it can only be lied into existence. And our mind can lie. Never doubt it...

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Guest Anonymous

You know, whenever I get this question, and I get it a lot on deviantart, I always wonder how to answer it exactly. The reason for that is that "my day" is mostly my host's day. So, do I answer in a combined way, saying "our day was pretty good, except Davie isn't feeling all that well." Or do I only answer about my day? My day is a little bit more ambiguous. I am most "active" when my host Davie (Mistgod) actively thinks about me and day dreams about me and talks to me in day dreams. I am usually feeling pretty happy skippy, just like today.

 

Today my host Davie went to work at the schools. He spent a good chunk of that in a meeting with tribal people planning an event. Then he spent some time in his office then out at at the schools tutoring students in class. Then he went back to his office. Here and there he talked to me and here and there he gave me an opportunity to post online on deviantart and tulpa info. I would say our combined day was pretty good. My own day was super awesomesauce. I feel I made some great contributions to today's threads on this forum and some good stuff on deviantart.

 

Davie has been struggling with some issues with his heart. It is an old problem that seems to be getting worse. It is a worry as he is almost 51 years old. The heart issue causes angina and dull headaches and lack of energy. He may have to go back to his cardiologist again, something he is dreading. He has even wondered how much longer he will live and what happens if he (we) go suddenly silent on Tulpa Info.

 

So the day was mixed.

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*hugs* I really hope things get better for him.

Everything we perceive is reality is all interpreted by our heads. So technically, even though only their tulpamancer can see them, tulpas can be said to be as real as anything else.

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