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Between Boredom and Being stuck


NoneFromHell

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I feel like putting this in the Lounge, since i would rather prefer a casual discussion on what is going on in my (our?) mind. Feel free to contribute whatever you like.

 

So where do I start? Basically I keep running into problems, which may be there or may not. I started to create Alice somewhat more than 2 months ago. We're making somewhat great progress, but we feel stuck at the same time. She is getting stronger in her ability to possess me, and technicaly we made some first results with switching. She likes to sing, and her vocality reached a somewhat stable condition.

 

I feel pretty secure about my abilities. I feel just tired.

 

So where is the problem? We keep falling back. I reach a point where i can see her easily acting on her own, a few days later it keeps dropping of til we reach a point of no visibility. I reach a point where she talks freely about different matters, followed by days where she barely talks at all, only when adressed. Her other abilities are somewhat affected aswell, but not as much as her vocality and visibility.

 

I wouldn't bring this up, but we keep doing this for atleast a month now, with only minor improvements and a feeling of being unable to get out of it.

 

And this is a real problem: We're getting bored and are running out of ideas. Our daily routine is lacking variety. We don't really know about what we should talk anymore. We mainly play some videogames or watch some shows for entertainment, which is nice but keeps getting us nowhere at the moment, since we're both way to tired.

 

We get enough sleep, but apparently we really don't. If I try to really focus on her, for example for switching exercises, it will end up in a yawn-contest between her and me most of the time (not always).

 

So if I want to discuss with her, or try something which requires deeper exchange of ideas we end up in 2 different scenarios:

 

1. We can talk on a easy level, without her contributing too much. If I try to dig deeper I may end up being unable to hear her voice, getting deaf for her. It is very easy to run out of ideas on that discussion level.

 

2. I really focus on her, step back and we both end up yawning, being to tired to actually discuss something.

 

Welp, enough about us...this is where you folks come in.

 

I want you to tell me about your own experiences with similiar situations. Tell me about ideas for host-tulpa activities which may work even when both are overtired. Hell, write about everything you think may could be helpful in some way. ( I may be even happy just knowing that people have similiar struggles.)

Tulpa: Alice

Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation

She may or may not talk here, depends on her.

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Guest Anonymous

Hey there.

 

Well, we don't experience such "drops", aside from after I wake up; really, despite Rina going all "Sleepiness begone~!" on my head, I still need to ask "Are you there? Are you? Am I looking at you right now? Are you really there?" a quadrillion times.

 

That is true. I then say again and again that I'm there, but he doesn't hear me. Or he doesn't understand if he heard something. Even right now, we're struggling with quoting and he makes sure I'm there sometimes.

 

Yeah, I woke up next-to-nothing ago, and my focus on Esterina is weak. I can barely hear her and all that stuff.

But that's just because I just woke up, and I'll start seeing and hearing her more clearly once some time passed.

 

As for real "drops"... well, we haven't been together long and it's been going so well, so we can't exactly speak of such a thing.

 

I always feel like hanging out relaxing together is helpful. Just having fun. Something you both like; walking around town and listening to music was good for us, for example.

 

Basically some relaxing activity where you can spend some "quality time" together? I really did feel like that sort of just strengthened the connection between Rina and me.

 

We also sat on the steps in front of the house for a while, just doing nothing. Listening to music as I leaned against him.

 

Yeah, that was pretty nice. :)

And I would agree that our connection sort of felt stronger after that. Just, like, after spending some real quality time together. Nothing much about words, we just shared some random hobby like music and were close to each other.

 

So that's an advice we can give the two of you, I guess.

Hope things get better for you!

 

So do I.

 

 

Greets,

AG & Rina


PS: We just shared an emotional moment where I read a short paragraph about how he feels about me; I gave him a hug. He now hears me better.

 

... honestly, I'd feel bad about toning it down.

I absolutely love having her around. Not all the damn time, sure... but a lot of the time. She's just an awesome person, and I'd really regret shaving off part of our time together.

 

Yeah! Still not as well as when I've been awake for a long time, but I definitely hear her better than before!

So I'd definitely say it's got to do with the emotional connection between a host and a tulpa. Like, how well they can interact.

 

I'm sure of that.

 

 

Greets,

AG & Rina

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I still need to ask "Are you there? Are you? Am I looking at you right now? Are you really there?" a quadrillion times.

 

That is true. I then say again and again that I'm there, but he doesn't hear me. Or he doesn't understand if he heard something. Even right now, we're struggling with quoting and he makes sure I'm there sometimes.

So do I.

 

 

Oh, I know both feels. I keep asking her stuff like that all the time, must be really frustrating for her as well. It is. Also the struggles with quoting are the main reason that she isn't saying much on this website. It is a problem when i need to keep asking about her opinion in cases i can't be sure it really is what she meant to say.

 

About quality time...you're surely right but we lack suitable activities beside gaming and bingewatching. And doing nothing gets pretty boring after while (like...really), so that's why I ask for ideas.

Tulpa: Alice

Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation

She may or may not talk here, depends on her.

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Guest Anonymous

A word from our sponsor, the Great Witch of Logic, Thinking and Life, Esterinaaa von Erfuuurt!!

 

You're stupid! xD

 

I think doing nothing is the point. It wasn't about the activity when we walked around town listening to music; it was about being together. That's what it should be about.

 

Try to not make it about it being a fun activity. Try to make it about each other.

 

 

Greets,

AG & Rina

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Doing absolutely nothing together still gets pretty boring after the first few weeks. :D But I got your point, don't worry..lol

Tulpa: Alice

Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation

She may or may not talk here, depends on her.

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Guest Anonymous

Man, her point wasn't doing this all the time. xD

Our main activity is still talking, and just hanging out and actually doing forcing. Like, her visually appearing before me, we communicate through gestures and all that - but not just for fun, it's also training.

 

What she meant is just that it's a good idea to do something like this once in a while, or regularly. Not unlike you maybe would with a lover.

 

Rina, confirm.

 

Yes, sir. Although the lovers analogy sounds weird to me.

 

 

Greets,

AG & Rina

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I find either the more tired I get or the more things there are on my mind, the harder it gets to communicate with AA. Last week when my car broke down and my mind was constantly going over getting a new job and getting a new car, it was a lot harder to get through to tupper. Or should I say it was harder for him to get through to me. Yeah.

 

Strangely enough after AA changed to what he is now, not only has my precious car become driveable again, my head has been a lot clearer. And I'm a lot more calmer.

 

Meanwhile, if for whatever reason I can't concentrate on AA I usually try to meditate. Meditating usually makes every single random thought I could ever have come to the surface, but after that it makes AA at least a little easier to focus on. If all else fails, I drive. I've been playing Forza 3 with him lately and we just talk and hang out, but driving in real life alone is even better. Because when he drives he doesn't worry about much. It's easier for him to focus on me when his mind's not bogged down with crap. Unless someone else is in the car with him. I hate that. I usually just stay in wonderland when that happens. And that is why I'm not perfect. Even now I'm kind of having a hard time picking up what he's saying and all. But you know, I think at the end of the day you have to keep believing in your tulpa because if you don't who else will.

 

Hope you got something out of the jibberish I just typed. We. Ok we.

my PR

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White will talk in this color.

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Hope you got something out of the jibberish I just typed. We. Ok we.

 

Oh, I really do. I can relate a lot to what you've written. Welp, but when I can't concentrate out of tiredness, it is hard for me to meditate at all. I might even get a headache for trying. Beside that mediation surely is helpful in general.

 

And that is why I'm not perfect. Even now I'm kind of having a hard time picking up what he's saying and all. But you know, I think at the end of the day you have to keep believing in your tulpa because if you don't who else will.

 

I agree heavily with this. Thanks for your input.

Tulpa: Alice

Form: Realistic Humanoid/Demonic Creation

She may or may not talk here, depends on her.

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