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From the land of Valadorn


LittlePebble

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Intro

This is my new thread for my progress reports. The thread title comes from the book that I am writing based off of my wonderland. I have had tulpas for a little more than ten years. In the beginning I thought of them as imaginary friends. My first tulpa was Seria (pronounced C-Area). I don't remember where the rest came from because it has been so long, but many have come and gone. I have one tulpa now that comes to visit me only so I would remember her. Its interesting what your imagination can do if you just sit down watch it go. 

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I have had ups and downs over time. My mother even stole my diary from me one time just to give copies of it to my psychiatrist. I had times when I felt like giving up and my tulpas were there to turn things around. Recently I have been reminded the responsibility I have to keep evil things out of my head. When your curiosity gets the best of you things can go downhill. For the first part of this I thought I would overcome my fears and refocus my life on what really matters. 

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Set backs

I thought I would start a new thread entirely because I had some aggravating setbacks. I got really busy with homework and did not have extra time on my hands. I was spending my nights in my wonderland, but I did something stupid that made this difficult. There was this advertisement for a horror movie that I kept seeing on FB. Yup I made the dumb mistake to read up on what it was about. I was smart enough to stay away from creepy pasta stories, but I watched a couple of Youtube videos on where it came from. 

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I have been trying to clear my mind at night and it has been a little tricky. There was a couple nights I fell asleep with my bed side lamp on. I am a firm believer in The Holy Fathers protection. Especially because he has woken me from nightmares before. Even if something metaphysical was going on I have a lot of faith that God would be there with me. Even though I can't prove it I have been protected from some really dumb decisions. 

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My plan

For the most part this has made it difficult to set a peaceful atmosphere in my wonderland. There is this thing that I call static that makes things difficult. Its where random things happen and in some cases makes my fears difficult to control. If I am going to get back to where I was I will have to face my fears. I don't plan on staring into a mirror lit by candle light and I definitely don't plan on taking a walk in the forest after dark. 

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I plan on working my way up to a candle lit alter in my room to spend time with God and my wonderland. Lucky for me, my room is above ground. Some people think that the worst place to have an alter is below ground. Personally I think God can do miracles anywhere, but I would not want to make it any harder than it has to be.

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When I created my first Tulpa a little more than ten years ago I did it with pencil and paper. I will start there about 5pm when its still daylight. Writing has helped with filter out the random things static has done in the past. Once I get used to switching I will change the time about half an hour later. When I get to 8pm I will make it a bed time routine. With any luck I will be able to overcome my fear of the dark.    

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