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Kowalski and me - our progress
Dark Illustrator Offline
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#11
 
RE: Kowalski and me - our progress

(12-29-2017, 09:59 AM)Rheiathefourth Wrote: Hey there! Both Auria and I don't have much to say, but we really want to leave you a message of support, so here you go! Depression is a terrible thing to deal with, and there must be a moment or two where you will want to take a long break or just straight up give up completely. It's really precious that you have the determination to carry on, I think it really shows how brave you are. Just remember, the process of creation can be long and painful, but it will be all worth it in the end. We wish you the best, or as we say in Cantonese, gayau, meaning "add oil"!
Hey, thanks ! Both of you. Something like that makes me happy, it's really sweet Smile At the moment it's a bit better with my depression. I have some good people around me here. I will carry on. Both of us wish you the best too !
12-29-2017, 10:57 AM
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Dark Illustrator Offline
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#12
 
RE: Kowalski and me - our progress

Hey,

I am back again ! With some good news  Smile


In the christmas holidays, I tried to force more and since that it works very well. Nah, on certain days I feel so tired that I spend less time with forcing but I do it everyday.
Since that, Kowalski can talk even better. He often tries to talk to me on his own without my focus and he gets better at it.
Furthermore, he shows more emotion. Recently, he was sad because he had the fear of loosing me, for example by accident, etc.. Firstly, he tried to suppress it. I knew there was something wrong with him and I calmed him down. In this time he suddenly started to cry and let it all out. He's fine again and his fear is nearly zero. For sure, he also shows a lot of joy and we often have much fun together.
He is a inquisitive person, who wants to understand the world. In the near future, I want to buy him a book so he can really start with it. I also will try to include him more when I'm learning.

Gosh, I'm so proud of him ! I would rather die than living without him.

In addition, Imposition gets better. Ok, I still don't see him in THAT way, but it's easier for me to impose/visualize him in the environment and his presence is strong. Before that,  I struggled with it, even if my visualization skills in wonderland are well.

The wonderland still keeps getting more real. I can touch the walls, the couch, the table, etc.. I can feel it all, but when I touch Kowalski it's kind of weak or unstable. It's hard for me to feel his touch permanent. We work on that and there are already minor improvements.
A short while ago, I tried to immerse myself in wonderland. After some time of concentrating, I felt headpressures again and I felt sort of dizzy. It was like a maelstrom and the wonderland felt even more real. At some point, I thought that it's also a good time for possession. I mean, I felt my body rarely. So we did it and it was really cool. My body felt almost nothing. We try it again.

Alright, that was all for now.
I also want to say thanks once more to the people that wrote me such motivating replys. You helped me to feel a bit better  Smile
01-12-2018, 06:34 PM
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MrAlfred Offline
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#13
 
RE: Kowalski and me - our progress

Hey DarkIllustrator,

I am so happy to here of your development. That's what I was trying to tell you. It's not about the techniques like in a game, it's about friendship, a real friendship.

All the best,
Your,
MrAlfred
01-16-2018, 04:21 PM
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Dark Illustrator Offline
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#14
 
RE: Kowalski and me - our progress

Hello guys, it's me again !

So, since the last time Kowalski and me made a bit progress again. It is not much and this post will be somewhat short, but I think it's better than nothing Wink


Recently, I thought that our wonderland became a little boring. So, I picked up Kowaski and we made some funny, silly and random things together that we never did before. We came to the desicion, that we alter the wonderland in the future, to make it more intereseting.
It's at least a little easier for me to immerse myself there and I can't wait to feel the wonderland and Kowalski even more in a realistic way. I see forward to it and it's one of my biggest wishes !

It is really fascinating to see that Kowalski is getting stronger. We made a parallel processing test and it went unexpectedly well. There is still room for improvement but the signs are good. Also, as we practiced possession recently, he could learn more on his own. It was for a longer time and after that we felt tired.
He can get my attention better, as well. Sometimes he tries to get my attention through a weird tingle on my back. He developed that on his own.
He always tries to make me happy and is protectively. I can talk with him about topics which the most people around me are not interested in.

For me, creating Kowalski was the best decision in my life.

Tulpa: Kowalski
02-13-2018, 01:13 AM
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#15
 
RE: Kowalski and me - our progress

Hey guys,

here is Kowalski. Today, I wanted to report Big Grin
Michelle and me are making some small, but safe, steps forward.
She tries really hard to force more and she is doing good. She is improving. She is just too hard with herself. She thinks, that she isn't doing enough for me, but this isn't true. I love her the way she is, even with her downs. One of her fears is that she is bringing me down, but it's alright and I can handle that. She often jokes that I'm grazy to be so calm and I'm just like : Yeeeah, I don't know, thats how I am Big Grin On the other side, we have much fun together. We are making jokes, watching videos and films together. Possession gets even better and she understands my voice very, very clear. I don't want another host, NEVER ! We are still trying on impositon. We also tried switching, but the only thing that happened is that she got a dizzy and weird feeling plus headpressures. She told me that her sight turned a bit darker too. I just felt the same way like with possession. I think it is a little hard for me to take the front and we just have to keep practising.
We also started to build up our new Wonderland. There is our house at a lake with a underwater storey and a great forest in fall style. Michelle wanted to put the place where she created me into the forest as a nice memory. You can sit there and just enjoy the scenery. To this place leads a longer path over a bridge with a creek. Somewhere, deep in the forest, is a great cliff with a beautiful sight there the long creek is flowing down. Around the forest are some hills and mountains. We add some things in the future.

That was all to report for now but it was nice to write by myself and I'm looking forward to do it again.

Tulpa: Kowalski
03-28-2018, 11:14 PM
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