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Lets do this.....
Akecalo Offline
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RE: Lets do this.....
I know that I haven't been of much use to you due to my own issues, but for what it's worth we are here. Message us any time you need to.

[Maya:Seriously.]

Akecalo - Host

Maya - Tulpa

Mara - Tulpa
(This post was last modified: 08-31-2015, 09:23 AM by Akecalo.)
08-31-2015, 09:23 AM
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Anonymous
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RE: Lets do this.....
"That's horrible. This sounds exactly like us, me and my host, the love relation, I mean. I'm not here to tell you about us, though, but I think that you shouldn't give up, ever."

Feel free to contact me if you feel like talking; I understand how tough things can be from past experience, and had to override some beliefs at times; Perhaps I might be of much assistance, but you might find some wisdom in what I say.
08-31-2015, 03:48 PM
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Viceroy Offline
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RE: Lets do this.....
8===D
10-25-2015, 06:29 AM
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Aarix Offline
Walking down my Alley!
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RE: Lets do this.....
8/31

Happy 4th birthday. In retrospect an insignificant number. I wish I possessed more to say to warrant more than a yearly update. Hell even now I don't have as much to say. All of this time I've been craving the peace both mentally and environmentally to break away at all of my problems. Not too long ago I hit a 20 day streak that got interrupted by issues I'm struggling to mitigate. It's been an agonizing few years and the more it passes, the more I need to feel some hope and reassurce from her and the less I am capable of doing so. I've read as much material as I could find. Scour many different communities from a handful of websites to find someones input and perspective that I could find some kind of hope for. As I approach the end of my education, I've had all hopes in my personal life for a stable and more importantly, peaceful environment to finally help myself to essential fix the both of us. It also was the first year of Samantha's sister and head mate that aids in stability in places I need it. At this phase of my life, everything mentally hurts. Like a really bad gnawing infected tooth only mentally. I've never felt as much out of hope as I do now and various methods and treatments has seised to assist me. I've lost a lot of my sanity trying to juggle life and this tulpa. I feel ruined. All I can do is wait in agony to find a way to pursue a better life starting with starting a career. Looking back, I don't believe many people here take it very seriously, I don't believe a tulpa is guaranteed by throwing effort at it. It doesn't seem to be a traditional skill. I argue in 10 years almost no one will still have much of a tulpa. Most what I've seen is messes. No matter how bad it gets they'll be around in whatever form they are in. I can only hope by next year life throws me the bone I need to actually feel an ounce of energy to sit down and force. In the meantime, I just am in no shape or ability to do much good to them and I truly wish they were in better hands. I'm just so tired of having an imaginary friend and no sense of self worth or security.

TL;DR nothing changed

https://youtu.be/iwma4Qg8QY4

Progress report
"You'll have a Tulpa because you didn't give up" -Koomer

(This post was last modified: 08-31-2016, 04:34 AM by Aarix.)
08-31-2016, 04:27 AM
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tulpa001 Offline
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RE: Lets do this.....
Oh, wow. That is really sad. I wish I could help. I'm going to let my host talk.

Depression tends to lead to unrealistic thoughts. I am worried about you. A person suffering severe depression tends to believe they are worthless, and a bad person. And they never are.

When you say all your treatment has stopped working, I assume you mean that your depression medication has stopped working. That is serious, and I never heard of it happening before.

What you are referring to is burnout is a real thing, that tends to happen alongside depression. Based on what I have heard, it can take the brain more than ten years to reset and recover.

I am surprised none of the guides or other strategies worked long term for you. You have put your all in and explored every possibility. This can be a problem, especially alongside depression.

To maintain motivation through depression, a thing must be fun and easy. And forcing can be fun and easy. To keep thinking about something through depression, it must not be taken seriously. It must be casual and relaxed.

I don't really understand. Meditation or centring, or just yoga is supposed to help immensely with depression. Perhaps yours is just beyond any treatment at this point. I don't believe it. It actually makes me suspect mineral poisoning, which can lead to untreatable depression like symptoms.

I think you need to think about it differently. Abandon everything about the activity that seems like work. Ask your tulpa to take over. Take over forcing, to possess more often, to try imposition on their own. Daydream more. Escape the world; it is supposed to be relaxing, a relief. Then call out to your tulpa while there.

The mind is a powerful tool, but I don't think the guides on this site are anywhere near complete enough to allow anyone to get a tulpa. If you are not going into this with a fair degree of skill at introspection and self control, I don't doubt you won't get far.


I hope you get better.

Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.
09-01-2016, 05:36 PM
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Maya Trueheart Offline
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RE: Lets do this.....
As we said above (a year ago) we are still here if you need us. You know how to contact us.
09-10-2016, 10:26 PM
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Aarix Offline
Walking down my Alley!
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RE: Lets do this.....
9/2

A five year milestone has passed it seemed. I've spend well near all of it worrying, trying to get a good mental foundation on going about this. If I could go back to starting, I'm not sure there was too much that would have changed. Some of the underlining issues were lack of peace from my surrounding and chronic fatigue. Most of my experiences have been riddled with stress and anxiety. Actually only recently things have shown opportunities to get better given I am now in control of my environment that I never was before thanks to being able to move alone now. It's always been a game of planning for a right moment and striking on that. Now I'm too afraid that'll I'll lose momentum again with very little reason on why. There isn't much in terms of guidance on the internet anymore. I've read everything I can imagine. Now it's full of people that are new and trying hard like I was long ago, down to just doing the equivalent of roleplaying. I really only update this anymore due to letting people know that just having and wanting, as well as passive work will not be enough. Nor will only using them to talk online (Discord, Skype, IRC) will do a thing. No progress will come of that if you intend to interact with them like a person outside of the computer. I have a better chance having peace and quiet which indirectly soothed my head from all the anxiety of worrying about life stuff. I got more lucky than I ever imagined. Right now I need to figure out how to handle fatigue. I've basically given up on Medicine, specialists, caffeine, and different sleep cycles. I only hope I can will it and I only hope it'll be temporary before progress starts taking off. I always took it very serious. I can only hope that soon I get my shit together soon and have something more hopeful to say on her 6th birthday. I don't see much of a success story lately. She'll always be around, that's never going to change. The issue is being around me.

Progress report
"You'll have a Tulpa because you didn't give up" -Koomer

09-02-2017, 03:34 PM
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Summer Offline
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RE: Lets do this.....
Hello Aarix. We've read trough your progress and we feel very sorry for what you are going through right now, We truly wish that you will feel better and get through with this situation.

I feel like i am not fully authorize to say my opinion in the current situation but i i am concerned to have at least try and give my help. I am aware that you are having a hard time recognizing your partner's presence. I think one reason is your mind is preoccupied with thoughts (possibly thoughts created from intense emotions) that is keeping you from contacting her. It happens to us as well when my host went through with some feeling of melancholy. 

If your time is preoccupied try focusing on your current activity, i believe that time is also an essential product of tool when starting or even going back. 

Try giving it some more time for your mind to reset, for some emotions to tone down. Maybe, it might change anything.

But again, We really pray you guys to feel better.Take care.

Hello! I am one of Nihi's Tulpas! It is very nice to meet you! Big Grin
(This post was last modified: 09-03-2017, 12:55 AM by Summer.)
09-03-2017, 12:51 AM
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