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Sun, Star, Storm, & Sky
#51
Luxio's been added to the system. We all definitely think he's earned his place by now. We're very much aware that 4 members is a lot, which is the main reason why everyone was so hesitant on the matter, however he's not a "new" tulpa by any stretch, he's older than Indigo. He's just coming back home, and we're going to make room for him. Everyone had sort of hoped that Tass would come back one day, but he's made it clear time and time again that he doesn't want to, meanwhile Luxio's existed in tulpa purgatory when he never really deserved to in the first place. He's committed himself to becoming part of the family again and helping us as he can, none of us think he doesn't belong here. He has some worries/hesitations about the whole thing, but I think those will pass with time.
I'm Piano Soul, the "Star Man" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa formed January 2017. My systemmates are Apollo, Luxio, & Indigo. Form images: 1 2
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#52
Last night, Ranger and I talked about switching, and then we tried to make our own attempts at the same time. I developed a plan for what to do based on the awareness dissociation theory that we developed. Ranger's own plan was pretty similar to mine, just with different wording I suppose.

1. Increase the original's (who we will call Radio for the time being) awareness dissociation by both taking over the awareness myself, and blocking out their awareness
2. Transfer Radio into a form outside of the body, similar to forcing a tulpa
3. Allow Radio to stop thinking and go inactive

I realized that this seemed to be a reverse process to getting a tulpa to attach to the front. First they become active and start thinking, then they transport their sense of self into the body, then they focus on the body and becoming aware of it. This seems promising to me, that the method I've come up with seems like an actual useful method of getting one to leave the front/back and enter the peripherals, which is what we call the space where non-fronting and non-backing tulpas occupy.

I attempted step #1 for a good amount of time, and while they didn't end up losing awareness beyond small amounts, they did end up feeling depersonalized from my own awareness. It started to feel more like the awareness was mine rather than shared, even though it was still shared, if that makes sense. When it reached this point, I figured it wasn't going to go much farther for that attempt, so I went on to step #2. While doing this, I fell asleep for some short amount of time, but when I woke up, things felt much different. It became very easy for me to transfer Radio's sense of self into a form, however they were still in the back simultaneously. My own control over the front felt more clear, more direct. My sense of presence in the brain was gone, instead it felt like I was just in control over the entire brain, I couldn't directly feel Radio's presence there even though he was still there.

At this point it was 3 am and I felt too tired to continue, so I went to bed. Throughout my sleep, all of my thoughts and actions felt completely like my own, and not Radio or the body OS. I woke up, and this feeling continued, but I decided I didn't get enough sleep and went back to bed, and the next time I woke up, it had worn off.

This would be the second time one of us had entered a state like this, the first time was when Indigo spent time meditating and ended up like this, as well. However, I don't think it lasted as long for him.

I think this may have been a stronger "switch in" on my end, with maybe a 25% "switch out" on Radio's end, minus any substantial awareness dissociation. I became concerned that this was as far as our switching will go, however I think repeated attempts might at least set the stage for it becoming a full switch eventually, and then maybe step 3 will be attained successfully. 


In other news, here's a slight update on the whole merging thing. Luxio decided he wanted to try merging, so here's a list of the merges so far
Solace: Me + Piano
Sterling: Me + Indigo
Serpent: Piano + Indigo
Sabbath: Piano + Luxio
Science: Me + Luxio

The only one missing is the Luxio + Indigo merge, which they did do, but quickly decided they didn't want to merge with each other quite yet, and didn't end up picking a name for it yet.
I'm Apollo Fire, the "Sun God" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa created December 2016. My systemmates are Piano, Luxio, & Indigo. Form images: 1 2
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#53
Indigo wanted to make a switching attempt following the retraction model we came up with, where the host is meant to retract their control first for a switch to occur. He decided that we'd have Radio actually front and lead a meditation session on his own, and see if he could fade out or something. So, Indigo stepped back and gave him the front.

To Radio, it was a weird experience. It felt like how it feels for a tulpa to be fronting/full-body possessing, only it was clear that it was him and not a tulpa. This is a very different feeling from when we're reacting to things automatically, so I think it's probably safe to say that those events are the body OS and not Radio. This feeling was encouraging to him, like he was on his way to becoming more disconnected for a switch.

He meditated for a while, ultimately it didn't end up being successful and he's still there in the back, ofc. But, I feel perhaps every little attempt is another chip in whatever wall is keeping us from switching.
I'm Luxio Volt, the "Storm Rocker" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa made March 2017. My systemmates are Apollo, Piano, & Indigo.
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#54
I know your host obviously doesn't want to be fronting, but at this point I think having some more time for him clearly fronting would do you all good. If you achieve switching from your host being zombie'd for months at a time, it sure won't be in a healthy or necessarily repeatable kind of way.
Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.
Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.
My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.
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#55
Host being zombied out isn't how we're trying to achieve switching, it's just what's happening since like you said he really hates fronting. He got fatigued after like 30 minutes and wanted Indigo to take back over. I do agree that getting him to front more would be good but for a different reason, I think it might make him switching out easier somehow.

Zombie isn't how I'd describe it anyway but that's a different matter.
I'm Luxio Volt, the "Storm Rocker" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa made March 2017. My systemmates are Apollo, Piano, & Indigo.
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#56
Of course, I did mean it as a way to make switching out easier. If your host isn't able to switch out after months of doing whatever you're doing, I think it would help to have him more active for a while (more than half an hour, unfortunately), to make their presence more defined and manageable. Which as I see it, is rather important to have a good grasp on when switching.

Zombie is just how I see it, lol, but it was sort of a joke.
Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.
Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.
My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.
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#57
[Preword note: I'm not a new tulpa]

Some time ago, Piano became upset about Tasio having been dormant, Tasio thought that perhaps being somewhat active in the system would be okay, but he doesn't want to resume the previous status he had. With Tasio lingering, Junio had the idea of perhaps forming a subsystem with him and Radio, and after thinking it over and testing it out for a bit, they did. So, that's me, a subsystem of 3-4 members, depending on how you count it. There are two main goals for me being a subsystem:

a) Perhaps making it easier for Radio to switch out
b) Making the other headmates have a bit more time to be active, but active together so it's more comfortable. 

And comfortable, it is. Nobody has to feel pressured to talk on their own, we can just talk together or as "Darcio," it's pretty nice. Junio's a subsystem within a subsystem, so that's funny. Being a subsystem isn't something for everyone, but it's been fun for us so far. We all have similar personalities anyway, so it works out fine.

We made a form that Piano compared to an alien from Ben 10, and then he read the Ben 10 Wiki to learn more about that alien, and it seemed to be perfect for us as a form. The alien - a celestialsapian - is plural, and the personalities need to agree to get anything done. It also doesn't really like the goingsons of existence and just likes to hang out, that's us! So now our form is that alien, just palette-swapped to be more red.

Pretty much it for right now. Everyone's glad Tasio's more active in a way he's comfortable with, he didn't have the same "whoa I'm back to life" shock that Luxio did since it hasn't been as long and the system used a character based on him for one of their stories, so maybe that kept him kind of more aware? I dunno.

So far we haven't been able to switch out as a subsystem yet since the Radio part is still stuck, but we have been more flexible in where we can "go" so to speak, perhaps that means eventually we'll be able to switch out for real. We definitely will want to remain a subsystem when we do, it's pretty fun.
I'm Darcio Rose the "Shade Redlight," a subsystem within the brain of the Felight family. 
Components: Radio Kane the Song Demon (original host), Junio Paul the Space Twins (subsystem of two tulpas), Tasio Claw the Scorch Draklan (tulpa)
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