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The Other Guy With The Psychotic Pony Waifu(The one that didn't torture his)
EdgeLordMaximus Offline
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#31
 
RE: The Other Guy With The Psychotic Pony Waifu(The one that didn't torture his)

(10-24-2018, 10:26 AM)Ranger Wrote: I reached a point where I didn't want Cat to create story characters that looked too similar to me. I didn't want her confusing me for a random character she parrots/puppets.

Interesting. Guess I can see the logic behind that
10-25-2018, 04:55 PM
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EdgeLordMaximus Offline
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#32
 
RE: The Other Guy With The Psychotic Pony Waifu(The one that didn't torture his)

Been quite a while since I updated, and figured I'd update this log because why not? Pinkamena is doing well, she's developed a lot since I last updated this. We've been having a bit of a hard time of things for a bit now, we've not really gotten along great for a while. I try and spend at least some time with her every day, and she's as happy as she ever is I suppose. I've personally not been doing great for a while and I worry that it might be affecting Pinkamena(In ways besides me spending less time with her and everyone else around me.) I can get into some really fucked trains of thought, especially when it comes to her and my general self loathing and guilt about a lot of things I've done over the course of her life. There was about a month or so period where she wasn't communicating how she felt with me and I think it did our friendship a major disservice, as it allowed me to mostly guilt free isolate from her. Since I've been feeling better I've been trying harder to keep up with spending time with her, though I have less free time than I used to, and am not very disciplined. I like to think that she's happy, but these days I'm not very active in the wonderland, and what she does when I'm gone, and how she feels outside of what she tells me, are things I couldn't tell you. I have a hard time really gauging how she is, for a long while her interactions where very clearly choreographed performances to keep my attention(Though this is less so) and even now I get the feeling a lot of her actions and words are tailored to avoid upsetting me, though I think she's getting better about just being her. I want to start keeping this log again, because I may have had a tendency to ramble and post too often about inane things, but being aware of how much time others spent with their tulpas in comparison to me helped keep me from sliding back into isolating myself from her, as I was more aware of how deficient I was as a tulpamancer in comparison to my peers.
03-09-2019, 03:16 AM
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Ranger Offline
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#33
 
RE: The Other Guy With The Psychotic Pony Waifu(The one that didn't torture his)

Sometimes when Cat had trouble talking to me, she didn't bother going to the wonderland. I have my own little space the size of a small room where Cat can visualize me as I speak to her. We found this as a nice alternative when Cat didn't want to burn hours there.

Cat had a lot of the same concerns when she was struggling with her depression. I remember when I felt like I was wearing a mask so I make it easier for her to visualize me, but I think on a deeper level to make me appear more likable. Right now, I don't feel like I'm wearing a mask or having to do an of that, but I don't have the same issues I used to have now.

Dealing with certain issues is just frustrating sometimes. My only advice is to not give up on each other, even if everything seems frozen or stuck. Despite your troubled past, both of you are strong people who genuinely care for each other.

I'm Cat_ShadowGriffin's Tulpa and I like Hippos! I also like forum games, word puzzles, and chatting about stuff.
Log | Chat | Yay!
03-09-2019, 03:50 AM
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