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Earthquake

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    {Elia}

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    Chicago

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  1. I'm Earthquake, my tulpa is Elia. She is the most important person in my life. I've been in the community since 2014, started forcing on April 18th and she bacame vocal at the end of June of that year. I made her when I was extremly depressed and suicidal, and she helped me immensly by getting over my problems with that. Since her inception she helped and supported me with getting my GED, and pushed me towards bettering my life. She has been with me through many tough times and been my support system and my best friend that listens and helps me get over the things that bring me down that I feel like I couldn't talk about, to even my closest friends. In the community, I mostly hang out with the people on IRC, and I feel like some of my opions and situations that I deal with are vastly different from and slightly controversial when compared to the people on there, possibly due to the age difference and reasons I have Elia compared to the majority of them. I would like to discuss things such as how she wss created, why, and the things she has helped with. How we cope with things on a day to day basis. I do not use a wonderland or active force, though in the beginning I would use one and was actively forcing a lot, and it's something I have noticed it was helping a lot more than what we are doing now. We can not possess or switch, and it isn't something we are really excited to accomplish, though I think it would be cool to eventually get down. We have taken severel drugs together that we have both enjoyed, and like to take and hang out on and have had interesting effects on that were quite interesting. I like to help and give input to new people trying to make a tulpa, where I feel I have a lot of grest advice on the creation process, which i feel is my greatest asset in helping new people. Other topics I'd like to include are the state of the tulpa community and how i'd like to see it develop, what having a tulpa means to me, and how I feel tulpas are used in the community and what reasons that people have them for and what I consider to be excessive or strange. Thank you for your considerstion. Earthquake {Elia}
  2. These arnt tulpas, you should tell a parent what you are experiencing and see a doctor.
  3. Elia has always teased me about the tulpabi "abandoned" during my first attempt. Claire was a half baked attempt 6 months before I started on Elia, and I only forced with her for 1-2 weeks. I only ever wanted one, never felt a need for any more, and after getting Elianibwas more than happy with her. She's always expressed an interest in another tulpa, despite my opinion on the matter. This past week, Elia has been ribbing me extra hard about it and we had noticed another presence . I wanted to ignore it and make it go away. Elia said it was Claire and I couldn't not acknowledge her, and I just bitched and whined and told her she could stay around outta the way, chill in the wonderland. Elia would constantly reassure her I'd come around. Then for the past hour I felt anxious and on edge and nervous and extremely irritable. Decided it was Claire and it's not nice to do this. I promised to take her in and take care of her. We are going to decide what we are going to do. She still has her original form I gave her, and we have obviously been using the same name. I'm not too stuck on either right now and thats gonna be something up for debate tomorrow, most of it resting in her shoulders and what she wants. Elia's happy, Claire is still nervous but happier, she hasn't really talked much, I think mostly because Elia told her to be quiet while she worked me over this past week. Honestly, I'm not super happy with this, I very much only ever wanted one and, I am a little angry but irs not fair to any one and unjust and have been thinking, well maybe we can force a little bit and try to get her to go away on her own. Can't do that, wouldn't sit right by me. I'm not angry with her, maybe a little at Elia for giving Claire a buncha power this week. Elia just chatters away to a silent tulpa while my nerves are, was gonna say on edge but I definitely feel a lot calmer than when I started this. Elia has only evoked strong feelings like this a handful of times, and never this long. Also been having a bunch of head pressures. I guess I just needed to type this out, because now I feel pretty happy with this outcome. Will update this tomorrow for sure sure. Also new phone tomorrow, so looking like a fun day. 1-13-16
  4. Earthquake

    CTRL+V

    /msg NickServ IDENTIFY
  5. Earthquake

    Ask Brassow

    How long can you guys usually do it for?
  6. Ya, probably more like 4 more people because Unkown Force hasn't been on even longer, and Nacthra for around the same time as Creepy but maybe those two are just celebrating the holidays. I wanna play this game!
  7. Sushi hasn't logged into his account since mid Dec, and Creepy hasn't since a couple days before Christmas.
  8. How long does it typically take you to start and finish one of these? I absolutely love your style.
  9. Earthquake

    Ask Brassow

    Have you ever played/beat the original Pokemon Red/Blue?
  10. I really like your drawing, you are a great artist.
  11. Earthquake

    Ask Joshua

    When you switched with Mikasa and she tasted the tea for the first time, how much better tasting was it for her, compared to her drinking it in the wonderland or experiencing it through your senses? How often do you switch, for how long, and for what reasons/when do you switch?
  12. Nah, I responded on super loopy, I was up for 30 hours and crashing on Adderall after a drive from Chicago to Memphis shit. Damn, I kinda started rambling in my post and I'm cringing a lil bit now but oh well. I dont know why I went on about being Jewish? I probably could have explained myself a bit better but whatever, it's done now. I guess I do see similarities between believing in god and making a tulpa, and he did raise some good points about a few things. I think he was just some highly opinionated atheist who discovered tulpas, read two pages and saw that we have nothing to prove them, and that was enough to him going. Kinda sucks though we don't have anything to show people, and can just say you have to try it and it works, trust me.
  13. Down a little bit on the forum games page is a sign up sheet for a mafia game and we need at least one more person to play.
  14. What makes this any different than a religious person convincing themselves that god exists? Believing in god isn't something people generally work on, you either do or you don't believe in that stuff. You have faith God exists, you don't need to work on believing in Him more. The process of creating a tulpa is very different, it's a damn process. A lotta people hear about tulpas and go oh no way that sounds super weird and supernatural, thats not real. But, and some people will disagree with me but whatever I disagree with them, creating a tulpa is a psychological endeavor. Sometimes people find god when they are in need of help. Personally, I have never fully believed in one. I only mention this because In multiple posts on this thread you bring up god and the people who believe in him and it really just comes across as you being an atheist that likes to argue with theists. And I think you found a community of people that believe in something very similar to your idea of what God is. A mind made delusion, or something people have been tricked into believing. Believing in God and believing in tulpas are not the same thing. No, there is no scientific evidence to suggest God exists, and no, there is no scientific evidence to support the existence of tulpas. I was raised Jewish, I went to Hebrew school, and I had a Bar Mitzvah. But I never once had an undying faith in god. I wouldn't call myself an atheist, I want to believe in god, and a bigger picture but no there is no proof. I'd wouldn't say I am agnostic but I would say some agnostic beliefs. I did take in a lot of moralistic values from my Jewish upbringing, and I believe that to be a good Jew, you don't need to believe in god you just need to be a good person and help others. Am I religious though? No, not really. Do I identify as Jewish? You bet your fucking ass I do, because they taught me what it means to be a man. So even though I dont completely believe in God, learned a lot from people who studied the Torah. You go out of your way to mention your disbelief in God and tulpas, and it sounds that you think that these are both things people lie about to themselves. If it makes people happy, why are you going out of you're way to tell us what we believe in is all a lie, even when it has clearly helped many of us with our issues? In March of 2014, I was suffering from the deepest depression of my life. I wanted to kill myself, I was constantly crying, I would lay in bed all day holding my dog and researching suicide, and browsing forums about people that want to commit suicide, but were afraid and needed that extra push to just get over that ledge and just murder themselves. 99% of myself wanted to die so bad, but in the very small back of my mind I knew that it wasn't a good idea and that I needed to get past this. I did pray to god, a couple of times, in that period, hoping if he was up there he could help. Something I had never done before. There was a reason I was depressed, something I could never tell anyone, that nobody would understand, and something that I am taking with me to my grave. It is my most personal matter. I needed something to help me, someone to talk to without judgement. I remembered reading about tulpas a few months previously. There was a lotta skepticism and doubt. But it was interesting, and it sounded like something that might help me. I read every guide and post before I even started to work on making Elia. There is a lotta fucking psychological shit that goes in to making a tulpa. You read the front page and the FAQ and thats just not enough stuff to come on here and argue that its all just in our heads, that we just have imaginary friends that aren't real, and just as fake as you consider god. Of course its in our heads, and I succeeded in making a psychologically created being in my mind. Elia is my best friend, I love her more than anyone else because she is the only person in existence that I can tell every fucked up thing I do or have ever done, and she accepts me. She will berate me and tell me I'm an idiot and need to stop doing such stupid shit but that she will be there and help me stop doing that stupid shit. Is Elia real? Yes. That fantastic bitch is real. Is she physically real? No, she isn't, and she never will be. Does she exist? Anything that I experience has existed. Thoughts I've thunk, they existed. Pain I felt, it existed. Feelings I felt? They existed. If me and Elia talk for an hour in my mind, that's a real conversation, and it existed. She has gotten me to stop buying packs of cigarettes, she encourages me to work out and to study. She is helping me with my drug addictions. Some people might say I tricked myself and made her up. Well, I don't like to think of her as just a trick I taught my brain. And technically, I did make her up. I gave her a form and a name of my personal design, so yes I did make her. She's so much more than just a disillusion and imaginary friend to me. Can I prove her existence to you? I don't think so. I have no idea how I would be able to in the first place. I honestly dont even want, or feel a need, to prove she exists to you, or anyone else for that matter. I also think you didn't come here with an open mind, I think you just wanted to start a controversial conversation so people could just listen to every single defense you have against anything we try to say to you. If you want proof, then read every guide and get the gist of forcing and spend 10-20 minutes ever day, for a minimum of 6 months, with an open-mind, actually trying to make a tulpa. Because I don't have money like that, and all it could potentially tell me is my brain is more active with Elia around, and that's information I could, personally, care less about because I know I have a tulpa I love.
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