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LoveOfLotus

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  1. I'm asking a question for a friend who wants to remain anonymous.
  2. Maya: March 19, 2019. So, I have a girlfriend now, apparently! That's really our only update.
  3. March 15, 2019. Lotus is sick and is resting, so I will be writing our progress report for today. We graduate today, which has Lotus in a surreal stupor of being simultaneously existential and drunk on Ny/DayQuil. Maya and I have been practicing talking to others and possessing, and we are making significant progress together. It appears any progress made by either of us furthers the other's skill, which is an interesting prospect. Lotus wants me to learn how to more readily possess so we can work on what he likes to call "collaborative writing", even though it is just basic literary roleplay. I have been attempting to learn this, but it appears to just be a matter of possession. It appears I have run out of time to write, and thus I must leave. Sincere thanks for reading. - Calvin
  4. Thank you so much! That aside. . . We also have some doubts and questions, which I will put here for personal reference, though digging through this forum hasn't proved to be very useful, especially with how hectic our life is- we simply don't have time. The three of us have been practicing possession, and I guess it's been going better than expected, according to Felight's guide. Most of our struggle comes from internal communication. I don't hear from them much when I'm actively focusing on things like schoolwork and writing and what have you. And when I do make a point to talk with them and ask questions, I can hear them thinking about what they want to say before they say it, sometimes simultaneously. Is that normal? But besides that, I've been working on meditation, and I want to learn how to switch, but with graduating, moving, and jobhunting, it hasn't been an easy task. Also, I have been getting some backlash on my status as a tulpamancer. I've been told Calvin and Maya aren't real, that I've been giving myself DID, that I'm a systemfaker, so on so forth. It's upsetting and we aren't sure how to deal with it, besides Maya and I having to hold Calvin back from blowing up at them. But, there is a more detailed progress report, since we didn't do a good job earlier, thanks to stress.
  5. 13 March 2019 Maya and Calvin have had some more practice interacting with others and thinking for themselves. I'll admit I'm a bit parrotnoid, but I also know that they are speaking for themselves. I am very proud of them so far, even though we've been incredibly busy with schoolwork and getting ready to graduate at the end of the week.
  6. Update! {I'm posting from mobile.) We hung out with a friend at a trampoline park today, and I gave Calvin and Maya both chances to have fun too. Calvin: Turns out I'm a bit too blunt and stoic to really sway people my way. That's fine, though. Lotus and Maya are all I care about. Maya: Our friend loved having me around, though. I tried to be graceful while we jumped, and succeeded to a small degree! So we all had a lot of fun. Maya tapped right in to Calvin's ability to possess, so she's making wonderful progress so far.
  7. You know what I forgot to do? Introduce ourselves for this thread! Starting off, I'm Lotus. I already struggle with depression, gender dysphoria (ftm), and mild PTSD. I'm 18 at the time of joining the forum, and I enjoy writing (especially roleplay), playing music (I play guitar, ukulele, piano, and ocarina, and I sing), and drawing (even though I am the most mediocre artist to ever exist!). I am a member of many fandoms, and have a huge interest in science, engineering, and mathematics. I also have many smaller interests, like sewing, candle-making, psychology, and yoga. I identify as ace/pan, and my personal journey with Tulpamancy has changed my life, even though it's only been a few weeks. My name is Calvin, as you know. I was created unknowingly by Lotus as a force to tell him that everything will be fine, and that he needs to be mature. I enjoy reading articles and spending time with Lotus. Due to all of his minority identities, he gets plenty of backlash, so I am very protective of him and will jump to defend him at the drop of a hat. I am the personality who utilises Lotus's martial arts training to protect him. I haven't had much time to explore my interests beyond what Lotus's initial reason for creating me. I hope, as I engage and interact with more people, that I find what my interests are. My name is Maya. I was created by Lotus initially as a roleplay character on January 26 of 2018. Thus, I am already over a year old, in terms of creation. I enjoy metalworking and spirituality, along with reading and ice-skating. Unfortunately, Lotus doesn't have very much dexterity, so ice-skating isn't an option for me, haha. I am very sensitive to the mistreatment of life, and I have a personal vow never to hurt anyone or anything unless absolutely necessary. I was given leadership qualities from my very creation, and I hope to help our system in a way neither Calvin nor Lotus are willing to. Thank you for listening to us! We look forward to sharing our journey with you!
  8. A small update, but I think Maya is starting to respond to me with words. I talked to her, calling her by name and telling her to call me by name if she ever needs me, and she responded with "Okay, [my name]". I know it wasn't Calvin's voice, and it wasn't me parroting, so it must have been her. I'm really excited!
  9. Pffffft, the education system is fucked either way. Damn industrial age values. The Moon was once part of Earth.
  10. I couldn't resist the chance for alliteration, I'm sorry! I will put my existing log from my notes here to give a bit of a preface to my (very short) journey so far. 24 Feb 2019 >Discovered Tulpamancy 25 Feb 2019 >Began developing Maya 26 Feb 2019 >Discovered Calvin 1 March 2019 >First responses from Maya in the form of head pressures 2 March 2019 >First tulpish communication with Maya >Calvin had some stuff too but it's private 3 March 2019 >Played Sorry with Calvin to help develop possession 5 March 2019 >Calvin begins actively talking to other people 6 March 2019 >Figure out what possession feels like >Join this forum 7 March 2019 >Calvin tries to front And that brings us to today. At this point in time, Calvin is at: 95% Vocality 10% Possession 0% Switching 75% Touch Imposition, 0% for all other senses Maya is at: 10% Vocality (only because she already has a unique voice and inflections in mind, but hasn't spoken yet) 0% Everything else We're currently struggling with a few things. Calvin is attempting to front, but- Lotus won't shut the fuck up. Yeah, that. So it's ending up more like co-fronting. Maya still doesn't respond beyond head pressures and the occasional tulpish, and I'm trying to encourage vocality from her, but no luck so far. Thank you for reading our progress reports! We can't wait to continue on our journey together. ^-^
  11. Hello everyone! I was introduced to tulpamancy about two weeks ago, and after quite a bit of fascination, research, and self(selves?)-discovery, I've decided to join this forum board. I already have a tulpa that I apparently was unknowingly developing prior to discovering tulpamancy as a conscious response to trauma, and I am working on a second one, but she only responds in head pressures at this point in time. Her name is Maya, since she can't introduce herself yet. I really enjoy anything creative, so expect to see a lot of creative work from me if I post it here! Hello, my name is Calvin. I am Lotus's first tulpa, and I am very protective of him. I wanted to state that preemptively. We look forward to engaging with you all!
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