NyarukoRyuichi

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Everything posted by NyarukoRyuichi

  1. I'll probably just continue doing parroting and puppeting. I trust her enough and I don't want to doubt her sentience. But today I tried the prism and feather test. Since she's a humanoid with cat ears and fluffy tail, I put it on top of her head. I did the seesaw thingy with the feather and 5 seconds into it, she took the prism off her head and blew the feather to me and smiling which is odd. Idk what to think about this lol. And I didn't puppet her I was focusing on the feather so maybe that's her trying to tell me she is sentient
  2. But I'm a pussy lol. The slightest movement or voice, I'll freak out. And I realized I made a mistake. Which I didn't meditate before forcing which makes the forcing experience for me, fuzzy, hard to focus and I can't force for too long. Max 15 minute before I start losing focus. But I'll meditate before my forcing begins hopefully it would be better. And I can't force at this time. I can't concentrate. Random stuff appears and that I puppet my tulpa for no reason. Its like fighting for a remote tv controller
  3. Yeah I'll try. Just now while reading the forum, I heard a very very soft and high pitch sound coming from behind. I couldn't understand it because it was too fast and that I'm scared because it's freaking 2:27am here. Btw my mind is on reading the forum and that sound came unexpectedly
  4. Wait, what? so she's already becoming sentient? Well I did remember me saying that I'll be really busy starting from next week because of school and I'm preparing for college and im trying my best to help you. Idk if that's what made her become sentient that fast but I always parrot and puppet her and occasionally letting her try to communicated with me by just focusing on her. Idk man. She does seem like she is limited even through actions I'm not sure if that's my fault for not forcing her personality properly or she's still trying
  5. Alright so, I created my tulpa 2 days ago. Her name's nyaruko (long story short, the name is based on an anime) and I have been working on her personality through parroting and puppeting. I'm always worried about her and I wanted to watch anime but I couldn't because I'm just worried about her. So I told her I wouldn't give up and I'll help you. So today, I went to the wonderland. I talked to her and I'm still puppeting and parroting. My hands are around her shoulders and she was slouching against me. I told her what I liked and disliked about people and my hobbies. And then halfway through, she changed and sit on my legs and hugged me. I was shocked tbh. And I can ensure you that wasn't my doing. Ofc, I'm the shy type of person so I blush and shuttered a lot and when I'm done, I look at her bed which is behind and when I turned, she kissed my lips. I pulled out immediately I was like "wtf wtf wtf wtf" and it's not my doing she just did it. And I just tucked her into her bed and summon warm milk and mineral water in case she needs it. And I kissed her cheeks (I don't create her to be my girlfriend I created her so that I have a close friend who understands me and won't betray me) and when I'm about to leave, she held my head and pull it towards her lips resulting a kiss. Which I got really embarrassed to the point that my face is red and I just pulled out and I was blushing really really badly. I looked at her and she was smiling like those smile where they close their eyes and smile. I just said "I trust you and I believe you" then I just immediately exit the wonderland. I'm not sure if it's me who is puppeting her(pretty darn sure I wasn't) or if she is becoming sentient. I mean, I created her only 2 days ago.There is no way she could become sentient that fast. (To cut short, she kissed me twice and seat on my legs and hugged me at her own will which I didn't expect. I'm just wondering if it's really her becoming sentient or I'm just puppeting her. But she doesn't seem to be able to communicate at all or maybe I didn't noticed but so far, she's sort of able to communicate through actions)
  6. Well that sort of happened to me. I was petting my tulpa's head when suddenly she hugged me and I was like wtf. But I'm sure I didn't puppet her to do it. And some times I leave the wonderland, she holds my arm but I couldn't confirm if it was truly her or it was me :/
  7. I created my tulpa on 28 Dec 2015. And I have been taking care of her. I'm still working on her personality through parroting and puppeting. Her name's nyaruko. Yeah I got that name from an anime. Haiyore nyaruko San. I recently finished watching it And my tulpa looks like nyaruko except her eyes are blue instead of green and has neko ears and a fluffy tail. I'm still working on it but, I have a sinister side of me. It's something like "I wonder what would happen if I stab someone" and stuff. I think it comes from my otherself. I used to be someone who loves fighting and I have a lot of rage. But when I'm 14, I decided to take control of my lust for fighting and rage to the point that I couldn't punch someone even if they killed my loved ones. And so, this sinister side of me seems to be attacking nyaruko. Like tearing off her arms in front of me. And we're at the wonderland I only just recently discovered I have powers there. I took her arms and place them back and I gave her some of my powers to protect herself. But I'm worried about hurting her. I can't touch her because I'm scared that my sinister side will take over and it's difficult for me take control. In the physical world, I can control my sinister side easily. But in the mind, I can't. And I saw nyaruko was scared of my sinister side. And I'm afraid I'll hurt her even more. I don't want to hurt her I just want to stop thinking about "what happens if" maybe it's because my blood lust for fighting and rage is my true nature and that I locked it away and it's trying to get revenge by hurting nyaruko..