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About Temar

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    Serial Nannygoater

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    SparrowNR's Head
  • Bio
    A soulbond from one of SparrowNR's really, really old superhero stories in 1999. 17 years later, he still has a superhero complex.
  1. Heh. This one sounds like something that happens with my headmate, Joss. We're a system that's strong at imposing, but he hates being looked directly at when imposed, because it's "not real enough." That's more a matter of personal preference than a visualization bug, though. ;) So. You've asked a couple visualization-related questions now, and from the looks of it, they can all be answered with a "Just keep practicing." The brain does some bizarre stuff, and if you're not used to controlling it this way, yeah, weird blips like this, the head thing, the arm's length thing... all of that is just the sort of thing that can happen sometimes, and the best thing to do is just accept it and keep going. Because here's a tip: a lot of tulpamancy is about self-fulfilling prophecy. The most sure way to get you thinking about a purple rhinoceros is to have someone tell you not to think of a purple rhinoceros. Along the same vein, the most sure way for weird stuff to happen in the headspace is to worry that weird stuff will happen in the headspace. If you don't worry about it, but instead just accept it as the nature of the beast, that sort of thing will happen a lot less frequently... or at least you won't be so freaked out when it does happen. So that's my suggestion for all your visualization questions currently on this board: keep practicing. Nothing's wrong with any of the incidents you've described other than the fact that they're unintentional... so just accept that they've happened and keep practicing. Keep your focus on your tulpa, and just go with the flow for the rest. You're doing fine.
  2. Yep, you've gotta pick what size you want the head to be, and then just practice to reinforce that. When you visualize her with a differently sized head, consciously take a step back and imagine what she should look like with the normal sized head. She might not snap back right away, but if you keep reminding yourself what her form should be, it should eventually stick. That said, do you know whether this is something she's doing on purpose? If so, let her experiment. She'll probably land back on a proportion you like eventually. If it's not something either of you are controlling and it's something neither of you want, you've just gotta keep reinforcing what she should look like in your mind. Like Tulpa001 said, though, a visual aid can help. Do you draw? Our system finds drawing helps reinforce what our forms look like, but I know that's not for everyone.
  3. Really, that all depends on what you want out of it. Do you want your Wonderland to be realistic, or do you like the stylization that comes from the video game graphics? Because you can totally have your Wonderland be non-realistic. Heck, my internal world is basically in a weird 2.5-D anime style, because that's what my host has the easiest time visualizing, since most of us were initially drawn in a 2D anime style. If anything, a simpler, more stylized Wonderland--like from video game graphics--is easier to visualize, because there's less detail and nuance to worry about, and if it's a style you like, you're just going to enjoy interacting with that world more. So, in answer to the question... nah. It's not detrimental to your tulpa. Really, the important thing is that you're consistent with whatever visualization style you use, because once you pick one, it gets harder (though not impossible) to change it later.
  4. There was a thread a while back about tulpas, possession, and the ideomotor response... Ah. Found it. Give it a read if you're interested in that sort of thing. To be honest, my system is, overall, pretty skeptical about this sort of thing. Mostly because we've played around with possession and switching, and we've also played around with the ideomotor response, and the two feel like very different things to us. I can control the hand to open doors or write, but I can't control the way a pendulum swings any other way than consciously, the same way my host would. Then again, we're the sort of system who can sense one another's thoughts and emotions. I know there are others who basically have thick walls between headmates, so maybe this is an option for them. I'd be curious to see if this worked for that type of system.
  5. It could be a couple things. To the main question: yeah. Voice changes happen all the time. Sometimes they're intentional; sometimes they're just the brain doing weird things. If this is your tulpa testing out voices, let her experiment. One of the best things about finally stepping out from under parroting is that the tulpa finally has the ability to make their own choices, and that's something you'll want to encourage. Let her play around with it, and if she finds a voice you didn't plan on, but that you both like, cool. That said... You and her are not the only possible source of voices. Just because it didn't come from you doesn't necessarily mean it came from her. See, there's a term we use here, "intrusive thoughts," which is pretty much a catch-all term that means "the brain throwing weird spontaneous things in that are not under direct control of any members of the headspace." So this voice could have been an intrusive thought. Until you get a feel for the way your tulpa feels while communicating, it's hard to know. Though, if you think it came from her? Go with it. It's best not to dwell on this sort of thing. Encourage her to keep talking in whatever fashion she finds most comfortable. And finally... don't be concerned that you're still parroting. When she's ready for you to stop parroting, you will know, because she will tell you so herself. Until that point, loosen the reins a little bit. Go with the flow and when talking to her, give her a few seconds to respond herself before you parrot. There might be an odd echoy sensation for a while, where you know what she'll respond before she does it herself, and that's fine too. Whatever the case, sounds like you're on the right track. Keep it up!
  6. I probably sound like a broken record on this point, but I'm of the opinion that most of the way a tulpa is built is pretty much based on belief, at least when we're talking internal abilities. Like... if you go into tulpamancy expecting your tulpa to be unstable or malevolent, then that tends to manifest in the tulpa in some way. Same case for if you think tulpas should be able to see through your eyes, or if you think tulpas can shift forms, or if you think your tulpa should age with you or remain age-locked forever, or whether you think a tulpa can fly in the Wonderland. All those are things that are directly affected by your belief of what a tulpa is. Gets a little more complex when you start getting into things that are a little more dependent on physical world factors, like how fast the tulpa forms or whether they can learn certain "advanced" skills, like switching or imposing. I think that's less about mindset and more about the capabilities and skills already in their collective brain. And number 5? That's just a question of language. Different people use the same terms to mean different things, and different terms to mean slight subtleties on the same things. It's why I can call myself a tulpa, a soulbond, a headmate, and a couple other things, and have none of them be technically wrong depending on what definition you're using. That's just how language works, you know? ;) Seems like a pretty cut-and-dry overall question to me, but hey, like I said, the power of "belief" is something I've always been keen on. It's always seemed true for my system, and to a bunch of cases that have come into the forums. Could be wrong though, so it'll be interesting to see some of the responses this thread gets.
  7. To be fair, ideas like "tulpa" and "soulbond" weren't really part of our lexicon until about two years ago. Up until then, I was just considered a particularly chatty story character. ;)
  8. I'm the system's oldest at... 18 years now? Sheesh. *shakes cane at whippersnappers on the front lawn*
  9. I don't recommend it for a beginner, but a big system is not really that bad. My system is cyclical... most members are regularly alternating between active and dormant. There's rarely more than a handful active at any given time, and we don't really feel the need to jostle one another out of the way, because most of us are developed enough not to need attention for sustenance as much as a fresh tupper. But if you're new, I'd stick to one or two to start. You'll have plenty of time to build up more, if this is something you end up sticking with. It's a lot of work to get one to stick. so don't take on more than you can handle, yeah?
  10. Eh, little complaints happen when you have multiple people living in close proximity, and you can't get much closer than the same head. ;) My host's most common complaint about me? Hm. Probably how much I prod her about her bad habits. I nudge on those a lot, usually by way of gentle teasing, but she knows me well enough to know that it's my way of nagging. Not that I mind... her getting annoyed about it means I'm doing it right. :)
  11. Heh, this is like a double necro. Ah well. Most of my system is fairly atheistic, mostly because our host is. While she'll say she's open to being proved wrong, I'd say she falls into the "hard atheist" philosophy more than she'll admit. She's done a bit of research on it, and regularly listens to philosophy discussions on the topic. For me... it's tricky, and it's mostly because of the soulbond thing. In my world, God exists. The physical world, though? I guess I like to believe there's something, yeah. Maybe not necessarily a strictly Christian god--my host's research on that is pretty convincing there--but I like to think there's some sort of guiding force to the universe. But at the same time, I'm a "live and let live" sort of guy, so I'm not about to kick up a fuss about it, and, hey, if I'm wrong, the world still turns.
  12. Yeah, I'll echo what the posters above me have said: if you want David, it may be possible to bring him back. Not saying it will be, because a lot of it depends on the way your head works and what you believe to be possible. But yeah, I've seen headmates pop back in after being dormant for over a decade, so it's possible. Here's the way I see it: a tulpa is basically built out of a ball of "stuff" that you associate with them... their personalities, form, experiences, voice, whatever. Those are the things you think of when you create a tulpa, and the trick of tulpamancy is to somehow give that ball of stuff "life." See, the thing is, that ball of stuff is still there. If you still remember your tulpa, you still know what goes into him. You still know what his personality is like, what memories he has, what he'd say in most situations. That's all still there. You just need to figure out how to breathe life into that ball of stuff again. Not saying it'd be easy, nor that it's something you should do. Just that it's possible. What strikes me about your description of his "death" is that it's really fast. Fully formed tulpas are rarely dissipated that easily. Then again, belief is a powerful thing here, so if you believe that is how your tulpa died, then it becomes self-fulfilling prophecy, yeah? One that you and your tulpa would both feel compelled to follow, because that's what you think was happening. But just like if you believe he's gone, believing he can come back can be just as powerful. That said? If you're setting out to make a tulpa who is not like David... just go ahead and do that. Start making a new person, and throw a little focus into making sure they're distinctive from David... different personality and form, all that good stuff. No need to make them the exact opposite or anything, just build them to be a separate person. Yeah, the process will likely remind you of David, but this isn't David, and like raising a second child, you've gotta give them the same amount of love and attention you did your first. No fair trying to make them fit whatever mold the first kid set, you know? ;;) Whichever way you go, feel free to keep asking questions. Just.. uh.. take Vos' post to heart, and first make sure what happened to David isn't likely to happen again, yeah? For both your sake and the sake of your tulpas, past and future.
  13. For us, it would be all in how it's framed. Most of my host's family and close friends know we "exist" as story characters... fabrications our host made up for her writing, which is true. Some even know that we talk to her regularly. The part they don't know about is the whole "autonomous possibly self-aware entity" thing. Basically, if she frames us as "I sometimes pretend the model of this character I've created talks to me" then there's really no need for any sacrifice, because most close family and friends accept that as a bit quirky, but within the realm of what's acceptable. It's when she gets into hearing our voices and holding prolonged discussions with us that she shies back about telling anyone. See, for us, it's about striking a balance. She does not want to be alienated from family and friends, and we don't want that for her either. But the thing is... we're probably not going to go away. Some of us are just too well entrenched for that. So it's not a question of giving us up. That just ain't happening. Instead, it's a question of where the line is drawn between our needs and the needs of the physical people around our host. So, I guess, to the original question? What would my host sacrifice? Well, if it came down to it, I don't think she'd have much choice but to sacrifice everything for us... not because of any decision on her part, or even because of anything on our parts... but because that's just how we function at this point. Heck, I'd definitely try to hold back around family and friends if it caused any schism between them, but I'm really not sure if I could completely go away if I tried, you know? Though like I said, it helps that she can pretty easily write us off as writer constructs, so it's not really an issue. ;)
  14. Temar


    It seems to me that, a lot of the time, it's a matter of the person interpreting the same set of experiences differently. Do you consider the subconscious processing that goes into a tulpa enough to consider them a separate person? Then you're a believer. Do you consider that subconscious processing just a self-delusion of dissociation? Then you disbelieve. We see this most often with Mistgod, who struggles with how an entity who is as connected and affected by his own mind as Melian could be considered a separate person. My own host has flashes of skepticism along the same lines, since she spent 16 years thinking of us as "characters" before we stumbled into tulpamancy and soulbonding. My host knows writers who have "characters" every bit as vocal and autonomous as Joss or I, but they don't interpret those autonomous responses as separate entities... they interpret them as mental algorithms taking on the Illusion of Independent Agency. Which, in my experience, is pretty much what a soulbond or tulpa is. It's just a question of how you interpret that illusion and decide to treat the potential being that comes out of it. Acknowledgement is a powerful thing, with something like this.
  15. This is pretty common. Best way to give her a unique voice is to actively workshop it. Voices are really, really hard to come up out of wholecloth (even moreso than visual forms!) so it's better to find a voice model, like tulpa001 said. Someone from fiction who you like or, even better, find an audiobook or Great Course or something... something where there's literally hours of one person talking. Then, find a way to start associating that voice with your tulpa. Have her "try on" the voice (which is, admittedly, much easier once she's stronger at responding in the first place). Do that long enough, and she'll naturally use that voice. Like I said, though, this is easier to do once your tulpa is a bit stronger at response in general. A bit of a Catch-22, yeah? But once she's more independently able to speak for herself, it will be easier for her to try for a distinctive mindvoice separate from yours. In the meantime, keep working on developing her in general. You'll get there. It just takes time.