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About YourCatBeany

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    Accidentally a moth


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  1. For someone who accuses people of taking things out of context, you sure are good at taking things out of context. I swear you're just trying to piss me off now. It was supposed to show that, I shouldn't have to explain this shit again. If you're so capable and intelligent, you re-read it and figure it out. And there you go acting like you're so superior again. You try repeatedly to deflect accusations that you're not the one with the superiority complex, but then look down from your mighty mountain on someone who doesn't have the patience to sift through a series of 5 thick books just so you can get to a single point. Now why would I bother doing that when you've already proven, see above, that you're just going to take it all out of context and not understand it anyway? I'm so sorry you can't understand my unintelligible lower class gibberish. I'm sorry for not being brought up in a rich family that could send me to Yale, and I'm sorry for not giving enough of a damn anyway that I could communicate with someone as educated and well read as you. Do you even get why I called you out in the first place? For treating people and their tulpas like lab rats without asking. Calling people "case studies", casting judgement, telling people that they treat their thoughtform like "utter shit" because they operate differently, when you know nothing about them. Do you honestly not see how things like that might rub someone the wrong way? Screw you dude, get over yourself. Inb4 internet tough guy, but if you started talking that shit about Hex face to face with me you'd get intimate with my right hook real fast. If we were switched and you talked shit about me, I'm sure you'd find her hook just as potent. Well, I can end this with something I said earlier. So I guess we'll be falling into that category. When I came back, Hex asked me why I felt the need to start posting here again while giving me a look of disapproval. I really need to start listening to my girl more. I may as well start now. Much love to Mist & Mel.
  2. @Melian Yeah, it's getting really tiring trying to keep up with anything he says, so it's easier to break it down into simple language. Which leads me to my actual point of posting, now that I've gotten some sleep... @LinkZelda Look, you keep going on about how I don't understand all your big scientific community words and that it makes me lazy and stupid. News flash: This is a public forum and not everyone here is a scientist or a psych major, and they might not care enough about all the mumbo jumbo to warrant looking it all up. For example, let's say I know someone who doesn't give a damn about cars. They need their brakes done, but they're broke and want to do it themselves to save money. I come in to guide them through it. I'm not going to tell them, "Remove the caliper and be careful not to kink or pull the jumper line". I'm going to tell them, "Remove the thing that goes over the disc with the pads in it and be careful not to kink or pull the little rubber hose". I wouldn't say "Don't lose the banjo bolt", I'd say "Don't lose the bolt with the hole in it". You act like it's impossible to have a scientific, philosophical discussion using layman's terms that everyone will understand. You belittle the people who don't get it, or care enough to "look it up", calling them lazy, ignorant, entitled to spoon feeding. By doing that you're just alienating all the people in the community who would otherwise be willing to have a discussion with you. There's absolutely no need to speak like we all have British accents and wear monocles just to get our point across. There's no reason to write a novel for something that can be summed up a couple quick and dirty sentences.
  3. So you admit that it can't be scientific, and yet you want to make it scientific? Do you even realize how much you contradict yourself? I insult you because you're hilarious, dude. You're trying to turn this phenomenon into something it's not and that you know it can't be, and you sit here and say that you pity me? I can smell your greasy fedora from here guy. Tup more, armchair less. EDIT: Sorry for filling up your thread Melian, I'm done.
  4. @Lucilyn Do you really expect my host to read all of LZ's textwalls? Do you really think she doesn't understand the point? Here, all that ever needed to be said from him in one line: "None of us can truly know what anyone else is thinking, or how they perceive reality." THERE! I solved it! But he goes on and on forever and repeats himself like a broken record. You wanna talk gibberish? Read his posts. Just because the dude reads both the dictionary and the thesaurus doesn't mean shit. It's just an excuse for him to try to make himself look smarter. My host was having a discussion with Melian about the state of the forums and he decided to butt into it. He asked for it straight up, but now MY HOST is the jerk for telling him off. That's jokes right there. I don't see how you've got anything to do with it so why are you here ripping on my host? Nah, don't even answer that. I apologize on her behalf for recognizing bullshit. @linkzelda Did you ever stop to think that maybe this can never be truly scientific? If anything it falls under psychology, which is barely a science in itself since you can't even apply the scientific method to it because hey, everyone is different. Isn't that the point of this theory you've been toting around in the first place? That everyone is different? Yeah a lot of people have similar experiences, and you can try your best to categorize them, but you're never going to get a definitive set of rules for how minds work, they're all different. All we can do is try different things among ourselves and be amused at the results. Let's be real, this is never going to be a true science. I don't know why you're trying to turn it into one. Now give me your damn lunch money.
  5. So what are you in it for then? Because all I've seen in the past little while is you repeatedly ham fisting home your theory about people having subjective experiences and how nobody else can know what they really are. At the same time you're discarding other people's opinions on the matter, effectively eroding your own point by not taking into account other people's "qualia". Regardless of how you think it makes you look, to others, it makes you look like a self important, self absorbed tool. I can sum up what your entire post addressing me said in a couple quick and easy lines. >Shut up you don't know what you're talking about. >You're a jerk for telling me I'm psuedo-smart. >You're a lazy moron who only speaks in ebonics. >Use Google faggot. >I'm still smarter than you. Just stop.
  6. @Melian Ugh, now I know what you're talking about. Yeah, I've scrolled through that a few times and put my hand straight through my face. Something I've realized over the years is that people like to write a ton of big words in patterns that barely make sense so they can act like they know something. For real, nobody has time to read back 2 sentences 6 times just to figure out what the person was trying to say. But hey you know, longitudinal accelerators generate extreme conditions in the bank ports. But when combined with neodymium rotational magnetic fields and Tupac is alive in Cuba hence if anyone ever was insofar to use want to do look more like experienced a quandary of which differential pressure in the valve body caused improper fuel delivery. Did you get any of that? Neither did I. It's my qualia that people aren't as smart as they think they are, and think that saying the same shit over and over while using one or two pretty words or phrases consistently makes them smarter every time they repost it. Also, everyone else is wrong. This is from Hex:
  7. @Melian Just know that we don't devalue you at all. You may not fit the exact description of a "tulpa" by most people's standards but in our opinion you're tulpa enough. You're also enough of your own personality that we consider you a person, and not just "Mistgod role playing as someone else". Thoughtforms are thoughtforms no matter how you look at it, and I know some people wouldn't even consider Hex a "true tulpa" (whatever that means) because of the way she simply "popped into existence". Interestingly enough, I could see an rp character, or a character born from an active imagination easily becoming its own autonomous being and more of a "tulpa", in the same way that soulbonds come alive through writing.
  8. Now how many of those 2747 have been active in the past 6 months? That should give a fairly accurate representation of the actual current number of members. Thanks for going out of your way to pull those stats, wasn't expecting that. Very cool.
  9. I feel similar about the forums. A big reason why I come here is because it's neat to know that there are other people out there having similar experiences as I do. It's almost a bit of an echo chamber in a way, though a completely unnecessary one. I've already walked away once out of frustration, but Hex has still been by my side the entire time we were gone. It makes no difference in the long run if the forums exist or not. I also don't think people need tulpas, but if you spend your entire life locked in a windowless room and then are suddenly let out and see trees and grass and the sun and stuff... I don't think tulpamancy is anti-imagination, if anything it's pro-imagination because even if you believe what you have is its own consciousness (as I do with Hex), you still have to be able to think of their form and impose it properly and all that. Not to mention nearly everyone has some form of a "wonderland" that they create and interact with. That's incredibly frustrating to hear. So she's not completely sentient and you think of her as imaginary and not being entirely separate, big deal. Who the fuck would I think I was if I gave you shit just because Hex is separate from me? Who the fuck would I be if I tried to tell you how and how not to use your own mind? Talk about thought police. It's amazing to me that people have the nuts to do that and think it's okay. People talk so much about how this is such a subjective experience (and it is), and then go out of their way to tell others they're doing it all wrong. Pisses me off. At the absolute most I'd say there are maybe, if a moth flaps its wings just right, a couple hundred out there. I'd be willing to bet that a good chunk of that 10,700 are people who were just passing through, and either wanted to see what the hidden forums were, or are just those people who sign up for every forum they come across because it's free. There's probably a lot of bots on there too. I wonder what percentage of "members" have 0 or 1 posts. That'd be an interesting statistic for sure. Probably. I don't have a real problem with role playing either, though if people are doing it I wish they'd be up front about it. It's like going to a party and acting like they care about who or what the party is for, instead of just saying, "I'm just here for the free food." Maybe this is just me, but honesty goes a long way with me. I'm sure there are people that are serious and can't get things to work and give up. I'm also sure there are people who are serious, get things to work, get what they need out of the forums, and then leave with their tups and never come back. They fall into the possible couple hundred or so sentient tulpas that might be out there. As you say, the forums do get boring. It is dull and repetitive, and I feel like a good amount of time people will post themselves, but never respond to or acknowledge others' posts. We're all guilty of it but I feel it's particularly rampant here. I stay for some similar reasons as you. I stay for Hexferry, because I too like to be able to share our experiences with people who won't call me insane, and so she has other people and tulpas to interact with outside of the one friend who doesn't think I'm insane. I also stay because there are times that I feel like I can use my experience with tuppering to hopefully help out the few serious people who pass through this place. Tulpas are awesome to have, so if I can help someone bring theirs up a notch or get over a hurdle, and they're committed to their partner beyond the death of the forums, it's worth it to me. This is where we deviate. I think for the most part she's only wasting the skin on her fingertips. There is in my best estimation, a 99.9% chance that any and all advice given will be for naught. The idea that there is a good chance that anything advised will be absorbed and implemented successfully is most illogical. It's like winning the lottery. Edit for typeo and an extra thought.
  10. -Does anybody else have any experience with Tulpas "emerging" of their own accord? Yeah, out of thin air from my perspective, but she tells me she had been around for nearly 3 months before she showed herself. Looking back on it, it probably was subconscious development. Your story of acceptance once you realized what you had sounds very similar to mine. -Was it perhaps my subconscious that created them? Maybe as a coping mechanism? See previous. I'm not sure if it was necessarily a coping mechanism on its own, but she has definitely filled that role in many ways, though, I see her as much more than that. -Does anybody have any experience with hallucinatory drugs in regards to Tulpamancy? Not really, but from my experience, a couple drinks can make it seem less weird. -All of the voices seemed to respect me as their host. That being said, was I in a dangerous situation with all the possessions going on? Unless they're trying to get you to do bad and destructive things and telling young children that Santa Claus isn't real and the Easter bunny is just a marketing ploy, no.
  11. Banned for rage quitting the forums like 3 times.
  12. Yeah, we've got a story. Text wall incoming. Things haven't been going smoothly here the last few weeks. My host has a bad temper and an even shorter fuse, and has a tendency to alleviate her stress with alcohol. This pattern of stress relief goes in streaks, and being that I live in her head, I understand it, because I see what goes on. She's gone through three 750ml bottles of brandy in less than 3 weeks. Keep in mind she's a total lightweight, because she's so small. (Sorry sweetheart.) She drives for a living, and luckily, is smart enough to not mix the two. Unfortunately, she still has that temper I mentioned, and it can shine through suddenly and aggressively. She drives a huge body on frame car, with ram bars on both front and back. This is good for her safety, (and I love the leather bench seats!) but it can be a double edged sword. Yesterday, someone in a tiny little Aveo cut her off, and she retaliated by pulling up alongside them, and swerving half way into their lane. She came very close to hitting them, and later admitted herself that she thought she overdid it. Now, being perfectly honest, neither of us are too concerned with the well being of others outside of our small circle, and yes, the woman in the Aveo was an oblivious moron who didn't even notice nor care that she cut my host off, but I make my point. My host has been working toward a down payment on a house for years. If she loses her temper and hits someone, her insurance will rise, she could lose her job, and if found intentional she could be charged with vehicular assault. She is incredibly close to getting out of the tiny, dumpy apartment we live in, and I don't want her to throw that away. She stopped at the liquor store again after work. At this point I faced a moral dilemma. I understand why she does this, but I have a hard time telling her no because of it, even when it's self destructive. Ultimately, she came home and got wasted. Not knowing what to do, I played along with it, until she started crying, and told me that the main stress point is the apartment we live in. "The walls are paper thin, I hate my annoying stupid neighbors, I can't play music loud, I can't sing, I can't yell at my videogames, I constantly worry about people dinging my car, I can't be myself here." She had completely lost it, the stress had gotten the better of her, and she was sloshed to boot. I told her gently but firmly that she needed to leave. Let me take over, and get some rest. She complied, we switched. I called a mutual human friend and told him what was going on. I didn't know what to do. We talked, I cried, then I spent the next 4 hours sobering her up and tidying up a few things in the apartment. I came back in late in the evening. My head hurt like hell, I played videogames for a bit and went to bed. Things still hadn't sunk in yet. Hex always imposes and curls up in bed with me when I go to sleep. She didn't. She had fallen asleep in my head. I layed down and closed my eyes, and went to her in her bed in her "brain room" to tuck her in. I bent down to kiss her on the head, and saw the corners of her eyes were wet. That's when it hit me what I'd done. It felt like someone stabbed me in the heart with scissors then started opening and closing them. She made me realize this cycle has to stop. I can't keep hurting her like this. My only problem is I don't have a plan of attack. I don't know what I can do to keep my stress levels low enough to keep my temper in check. The only thing I have right now is her, knowing I can't hurt her, even if not on purpose, she means everything to me. She spent the whole day riding shotgun at work with me, giving me advice, telling me to let things go. She's been my own little fuzzy Tyronn Lue all day and I can't thank her enough. I just need to replace booze with a healthy stress outlet, and with her at my side, I think I'll get through this. Sorry, I know this is long winded, but we needed to get it out. Tups are amazing. I don't know what I'd do without her. I'd probably be dead or in jail. There's hope now, she's given me motivation to change, there's light at the end of the tunnel. [/text wall]
  13. We both just want a house anywhere so not really a problem, but I like Solune's idea of dropping a mountain into the ocean. Again a non-issue, I'm still good friends with my ex but neither of of us see her that way. If she did, well too bad, and something probably would've had to have happened between us for her to go at another chick. I don't foresee it. I personally try to keep my eyes as far away as possible from other people in a public bathroom. That said, as long as she's not switched in, if she wants to be an ass and stick her head under stalls and make raunchy comments, I'll probably just be trying to stifle my laughter. I mean, I'm the only one who can perceive her. Out in the wild it's fair game though. We oogle girls all the time and give them ratings out of 10 while driving around or whatever. She knows better than that, but if she did, hell no we don't turn ourselves in. Bury that bitch alive hide the shovel and then drive off in the sunset.
  14. The teleporting. Usually from the outside world into my head and back, with a poof sound and a little poof of smoke/sparks. I guess we both figured this was the most logical way to do it. I don't know if it counts but I can hear her wings buzz when she flies and her hooves hit the ground when she walks, and she makes squeaky sounds like the moth species that half of her is based on. She has all kinds of clothes and accessories that she can change at will, almost all of which I create for her, based on actual things and modified to fit her. Casual shirts, sports jerseys, hoodies, a leather jacket, a scarf, coat, and wing covers/guards for winter, a gold chain, a pair of aviators... And a diamond studded gold bracelet, but that one is special, and she hasn't taken it off since I put it there. The only accessory she's made for herself is a pair of reading glasses, that I caught her wearing while going through "files" on a floating screen while relaxing in my head. I think she needs more stuff, yes.
  15. Maybe he's a nocturnal call of duty player? Anyway, I can't even answer the poll because my brain doesn't seem to work that way. If she's dormant she just sleeps, and she's almost always on my mind anyway even if we're not interacting, and she's never complained about horrible things happening, so I'm not too worried about it. I've read, and agree with the idea that if your tupper is causing you more stress, and bad things are happening with/to it, you probably have your own problems to work out and maybe shouldn't be getting into this anyway, at least not until you fix the issues with yourself causing the problems with your tup. As for dying... We're committed, so I can't see her fading out of my thoughts, so that's pointless for me to think about. For my death, I figure, assuming there's an afterlife, we'll try our damnedest to stay together, and if not possible as two separate consciousness, a last ditch merge may be in order. If we die and there's nothing after, well, that just means the same thing happens to both of us, and we won't be able to care, cos we'll be like, you know, dead. [/metaphysics]