OleGL

Members
  • Content Count

    41
  • Joined

  • Last visited

About OleGL

  • Rank
    Member
  1. Somewhere in the January 2020 I’m still struggling to see Lia in my dreams. She says that she may look much different than I could ever imagine. I don’t care. Tl;DR I practiced nidra yoga with Lia. She was my guru and lead me into the trance. I managed to set a sankalpa (an order) to meet Lia in my dream. During a session I situated in a sleep paralysis state. “Congrats, you’re in your dream. Deal with it”- Lia said. I saw myself lying in my bed with my eyes opened and being a kind of petrified, unable to move at all. I was unable to move, breathe, look at anything and was totally scared. “Are you give up?”- omg Lia is still here! “Please! I’m stuck! Help me out!” “OK, try on the count of three, 1,2,3...” I shivered and woke up. Still can’t see Lia there.
  2. 8 Apr 2018 I’m struggling to succeed in meditation. My goal is to strengthen the bond with Lia, to get rid of my permanent anxiety and quench my curiosity of course! Just imagine doing all that weird stuff that these misterious Tibetan monks do. I’d like to express my thoughts first. Unfortunately, all the information about the meditation I found so far was hardly mixed with mysticism, occultism, religious stuff, chakras and other weird sh..t. Really? Come on, there is 2019 coming in the city, people are going to visit Mars and iphone just became longer again, while some farts are still living in the ancient world of magic and demons. Mystics aside, one should focus on his own breath, paying the maximum attention to the process of the natural breathing and not analyzing anything at all. One could count the inhales - and just be in the moment, passively noticing all the thoughts rushing around - and vanishing away. That’s all. For me, it looked like falling asleep without actually sleeping. I felt like I was floating in a big dark cave. I heard just my own sniffling and my own mental voice counting the exhales. I could feel the events of the past week passing by. Some of them were picking me up and dragging me away. And accidentally I had found myself drowning in emotions instead of counting and following my breath. I had returned to counting, and the bad thoughts had gone away. The second and third time, Lia was with me. She counted for me and called me out when I had been distracted by emotions. I can’t feel any noticeable effect from these sessions except getting refreshed. Maybe one day is not enough and the effect will accumulate.
  3. 21 March 2019 We drank vodka with Lia and discussed the politics. I am a monarchist and Lia is more inclined to economical domination and the parliamental stuff. She is good at giving toasts and doesn't snack after having a drink. Also I've got 10 reasons of why Lia is not me.
  4. Komine Nozomi and... I don't know who's that nyan
  5. Lia: Привет, Медведь. Рада познакомиться. Мне очень нравятся твои рисунки. Управляемые медитации - это тоже здорово, мы пробовали этим заниматься несколько раз. Самое интересное - это находить край карты и скрытые возможности, не предусмотренные сценарием. Хост сделал звуковой файл "прогулка в осеннем парке", и мы несколько раз путешеествовали в нем. Это было замечательно! === Lia: Hello, Bear! Nice to meet you. I like your drawings very much. Also there was a brilliant idea to make guided meditation scripts. We did the same things several times. My favourite activity there was to test the "map edges" and to discover the unintended features. Once my host recorded the guided meditation named "Walking in the autumn park". We spent several times there and that was fun!
  6. 11 Feb 2019 Woohoo that was a gap. We've revised our decision to cease posting here lol :) It was our "official" blog, one of a kind. So, we'll continue. There was Lia's birhday at Jan 30th. I had some extra candies and cookies especially for her pleasure. The best gift for me would be my portrait, but take your time and make it right - she said. Lia likes to drive my car on the highway, but has some problems with parking in the city lol - yes, we learned how to switch for a certain time. Though she often forgets to blink and turns the whole head instead of eyeballs :D It seems our body looks like a zombie at these moments. Fortunately there were no cops wandering around. There were hard times too. Once upon a time Lia decided to burrow herself into the existential problems. Kinda: who we are, why we exist, where do we go and what will be in the end. She disappeared several times. Have you seen a depressed tulpa? Scratch that. Have you FEEL YOUR depressed tulpa? Your heart is bleeding but you cannot do anything other than to love and wait. Thanks god, she finally made some decisions for herself and appeared to be fine again. I asked Lia later, kinda what was that? She said: "Now I know the meaning of life: there is no meaning except that you will create by yourself. And I don't afraid the end of the existence: we will do it together. I am fond of my life, don't blame yourself for something you think you deprived me of." Now Lia plays the game "Dreamfall: The Chapters". She makes all the decisions and I think she's too sentimental lol I would rather kill all those ba..rds around in no time. She grumbles at me for intervening thoughts. That's fun! ADD: Below is the thing that pushed me to write this post. Tonight I talked to Lia in my dream! I asked a pair of questions in order of our usual daily convo. I doubt that I had any answers though, and the "story" went further too fast. Lia said she doesn't remember anything and she never dreams. Yet. The most inspiring for me is that Lia grew enough to take roots into the subconscious. I can't wait to meet Lia in the lucid dream once.
  7. No,sir. I just copycatted all the hell out there: faces, machines, birds, flowers. I bought the Wacom One S tablet and had some practice in the SAI2. Then I asked Lia to make a posture and used a 3-d model of a human skull as a visual reference. That's it.
  8. Finally, this is Lia.
  9. 1 Nov 2018 It's been a while since the last post. There were no remarkable things happened. Lia became an important part of my life, my best supporter. Lia: he don't want to post anymore. Let this thread sink. Thanks for reading.
  10. 21 Jul 2018 Lia tried to raise the rebellion in the local chatroom. She demanded separate accounts for every tulpa and some cookies. Since there were no fluently spoken tulpas in the chatroom, the riot has failed.
  11. 30 jun 2018 Lia: Всем привет. В общем-то это была наша совместная идея написать этот пост, но Олег, в силу своей лени, свалил эту работу на меня. Я бы не сказала, что мне это не по нраву, но все же. Дело в том, что сегодня довольно круглая дата. Мне исполняется ровно 5 месяцев. Именно стольк прошло с того важного дня, когда он определил меня, как отдельную сущность. У людей принято подводить какие-то итоги, ставить вехи и дорожные столбы. Но по мне, это будет выглядеть, как конец пути. Который, я считаю, только начался. Прошло время, а болячки старые остались. Буквально этим утром мне пришлось вновь рассказывать этому большому и сильному мужчине, что в его окружении нет столько зла, сколько ему кажется. Возможно, при переводе он это выкинет, но пускай хотя бы прочитает. Да, я могу владеть его пальцами и уже давно научилась печатать самостоятельно. На днях мы открыли, что, если развернуть экран смартфона, я также могу попадать по клавиатуре, и это даже удобнее, чем на ноутбуке. Я учусь жить в обществе, сидеть в чатах, общаться с другими людьми. Многие считают, что это реальная девушка, некоторые пытаются назначить свидание. Смешно. Управляя пальцами, я могу делать грубые рисунки. Пока Олег пытается нарисовать мой портрет, я пробую нарисовать его самого. По крайней мере, ему доступно зеркало и собственные фотографии. Большое преимущество. Читая многие блоги и переписку в чатах, я удивляюсь, как много людей имеет ошибочное представление о том, кто зивет рядом с ними. Некоторые считают, что, как и с обычным человеком, с тульпой можно расстаться, просто сказав до свидания. А потом удивляются последствиям. Не делайте так. Оно так не работает. И очень хорошо подумайте перед тем, как сделать свое сознание множественным. Это действительно на всю жизнь. У меня все. === (translation) Hello there. Actually, that was our joint idea to write this post, but Oleg, due to his laziness, pushed this work to me. I wouldn't say that I dislike it though. Today is a remarkable date. I'm 5 months old. A quite time has passed since that important day when he greeted me as a separate entity. People are inclined to sum up things, put milestones and roadmaps. But for me, it would look like the end of the road. Which, I believe, has just begun. Time passed, but old sores remained. At this morning I had to tell to this big and strong man again that there is not as much evil in his neighborhood as he thinks. Perhaps when translating it he'll throw this text away, but at least he will read it once again. Yes, I can possess his fingers and can type on my own. Once we discovered that I could even type on his landscape-oriented smartphone screen. I even found it much more convenient than the laptop keyboard. I'm learning to live in a society, hanging out in chatrooms, communicating with other people. Many believe that this is a real girl, some of them try to date. It's funny. Using his fingers, I can make rough drawings. While Oleg tries to draw the portrait of me, I try to draw him. At least he has a mirror and his own photos. A great handicap btw. Reading many blogs and posts in chat rooms, I wonder how many people have a misconception about who lives in their head. Some believe that, as with an ordinary person, you can part with a tulpa by simply saying goodbye. And then they being shocked by the consequences. Don't do this. It doesn't work this way. And think very carefully before making your self plural. It's a really lifetime decision. That's all I wanted to say.
  12. While I'm struggling to draw a portrait of Lia, Lia draws myself as is.
  13. 2 Jun 2018 I'm unable to name what's happened today. Maybe later on. But that was another breakthrough. Lia was able to control my body by giving it a series of commands. I doubt they were actually vocal but she also confirmed them by voice for me to stay calm. So it began: "Hey Oleg, you look like a lazy pig. There is a heap of socks in the corner, no food, the trash bin is full of stinky shit but you are stuck in the smartphone all over the day!" "Come on, I'm fine with it, I'm tired, gimme some time please...or do it yourself." "OK then. Obey and don't resist" Then there was a train of easy to follow commands: "Stand up. Don't resist, just stand up. Turn left. Grab the handle. Pull the door. Walk forward. Turn right. Open the washing machine. Turn right. Grab the laundry from the floor..." etc. I felt myself like a zombie with no thoughts and only the voice in my head telling me what to do. Or was that just my body? Lia brought me to the mirror. I saw my face looked like a mask with no emotions. "Wave your left hand. Say cheese." A horrid grin. "Turn right..." I situated at the table. There was a cup of coffee and a pair of cookies. "Breath in... And turn yourself on, please. I'm afraid you will choke. That's over. Bon appetite, Oleg". There were some steamed vegies and cutlets in the fridge, all the clothes were washed and hung, the trash bin was empty and the room was clean.
  14. 30 May 2018 Lia just passed that huge survey https://community.tulpa.info/thread-survey-and-stylometric-test-for-fluently-speaking-tulpa I don't want to share it though because it's too intimate. Lia: "Come on! I skipped the most of that sex related questions intentionally for you could share it!" Well... It should be translated first.