soyrenato

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About soyrenato

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  1. Hello everyone. I wanted to share something with you, and get your thoughts, as well. Since I was a little kid, and before I knew anything about servitors, thoughtforms, tulpas, etc. I got into a habit of what I would call, "just going along for the ride". Which is how I coped going through circumstances that were very unpleasant. I would take a long of comfort, knowing that no matter what was happening to me "on the outside", that the "real me" was hunkering down in the back of my mind, just watching and observing, waiting to come back out later. Perhaps this is a natural feature of the brain, such as in the (more serious) cases of dissociative identity disorder (where the mind creates multiple personalities as a response to great trauma)? Anyway. Lately I've been very much more interested in my own psyche, the inner workings of my mind and soul. I've seen my subconscious "flare up" during dreams, as well as altered states of mind during awake, and I've recently learned things about myself I never imagined before. I deal with a lot of conflicting thoughts and feelings in my life at the moment, and am stressed out very often. I notice that I've begun to "partition" parts of my mind into various "complexes", for lack of better term. And today I've read an article about a *benefit* of dissociative identify disorder. The DID patient in particular claimed that her alters allowed her to cope with various struggles and challenges that she would never be able to do without. Of course, I think DID is serious and I'm not trying to "get DID" voluntarily. I'm merely pointing out this one positive quirk of this disorder, and I see no reason why one couldn't pursue developing this aspect for their own benefit. To name a few: My deepest fears, some of which haunt me daily, have been grouped into a single entity, which takes the shape of a rather mean looking dog. My passion for traveling, restlessness, in-content, and fond memories of being with my family overseas has been grouped into another entity. I've also created/separated an entity for my passions and sex drive, which has taken a form of a large tiger. I've created a sigil for each entity. As well as giving them a face. Some are animals, but many are faces from a AI generated face website. ("thispersondoesnotexist"). My hopes are, that I'll better be able to cope with my problems, and better explore my psyche and learn more about myself, if the mess that is my mind is neatly sub-divided into these kind of portions/entities. I have come to believe these are types of tulpas...what do you think? And do you think what I'm doing is a good idea? I'd love to hear your guys' thoughts on this. Thanks in advance !