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About Luja

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  1. @Spice : Thank you for your feedback! I’ve read it several times since you’ve posted it, and it really helped me a lot with my struggles. Somehow I’ve always been thinking of my tulpa as an already finished personality with her own likes and dislikes, but totally forgot that she still has to figure out that whole stuff herself and that therefore my doubts are meaningless! And you’re totally right – every minute spent together is valuable, no matter how big or small the progress. Thank you for pointing that out for me! I feel a lot better already! I’ve now decided on updating
  2. After nearly three months of inactivity in this thread, I want to try and post more regularly here again. I have never given up on Tegernako or, as I sometimes call her, Tegi, but yes, there were some pretty inactive times when it came to forcing. My life has been, and still is, just incredibly busy and I constantly lack the energy and concentration that is needed for active forcing sessions. It was only some days ago that I realized I couldn't continue like that - even though we didn't have much time together yet, Tegi always has been important for me, since the beginning, and I c
  3. Thank you @ClianthaMiura and @Bear for your feedback and your advice. It really means a lot to me! It's good to know that everything in the development of my tulpa seems normal! 😊 On sunday and monday Tegernako and I spent the time before going to sleep in the wonderland, while listening to calm music. I sometimes forgot talking to her while we were there (shame on me) but I think it still was time well spent for both of us. When I talked to her and asked her easy questions throughout the day I sometimes had the feeling of an answer in tulpish but it was only vague.
  4. The last workdays of the week were very stressful and I didn’t have as much time and concentration for Tegernako as I had wanted to. Still, I always talked to her and asked her for her opinion whenever I could. I was looking forward to the weekend and to having more time again for her. Yesterday (saturday) didn't start too well. I had a massive headache and was just tired and in a bad mood. And I didn't feel Tegernako's presence at all. I got huge doubts like "Will this ever work out?" / "Can someone with so little concentration and discipline like me even create a tulpa?" etc.
  5. You have a beautiful art style. I love looking at your drawings. Thank you for sharing them with us!
  6. Thank you for your quick answer! Well, I know some people (family, work collegues) who don't think it's normal to read and enjoy such books. So I was afraid that Tegernako would think like that, too. She's not vocal yet, but I'll be glad to ask her about the books when she is. :)
  7. Hello! I love reading brutal horror and thriller novels. I somehow have a bad conscience reading these at the moment (my tulpa is 6 days old). Do you think, she could be scared, being so young and already having to read such things? Should I read some other genres maybe? Or do you think it's okay for her? I don't want her to think that she lives with a psychopath or something like that :'D
  8. Yesterday (Day 4) didn’t happen too much. I couldn’t concentrate and I didn’t really feel Tegernako’s presence throughout the day. But it got better in the evening when I had some spare time between dinner and going to bed. I lay down and started imagining us two in the blackness of my mindspace. I spent a lot of time looking at her face which didn’t show any expression at all. She wore red lipstick which I hadn’t intended for her, because I’m not the make up type of person. I still really liked it and I knew that she had made this change herself. The day before, I had shown her ho
  9. I really like reading all these progress reports here, so I'd like to share my own progress with you. 🙂 Maybe you have already read my introduction post here - I lived for years with the belief that I really had a tulpa just because of my way of thinking. I always thought as if I was in a conversation, for example I said to myself: "I want to eat something." And then I answered myself "Yes, I will go and get something to eat." I think I started that in my childhood and now, years later, it became totally natural for me to think this way. When I heard about tulpas for the first tim
  10. Hello! My name is Luja and I'm just in the progress of making a tulpa. I have a weird backstory. I've been talking to myself and making answers up all my life and when I accidentally stumbled across the word "tulpa" a few years ago, I assumed that I had one because of my "special" (?) way of thinking. But a few days ago, I started to read more about this topic and realized that I never had one. I just had the misconception that my way of thinking was tulpa-like, but I didn't even know that they, in fact, are independent minds who might totally differ from yourself and a
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