ruleofthumb

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Everything posted by ruleofthumb

  1. Betty and Fluttershy. Various attempts and styles. This felt good. I’ve been worried about starting to lose focus and I think this helped me.
  2. Banned for taking the thread in a different direction
  3. As the warlock was saved during the cuddlefish's surgery, he lives to follow her on instagram and makes comments on her self-improvement/travel blog.
  4. Stone: Yeah I feel like I have to do a lot, as I have two tulpas and I don't want either do disappear. I read somewhere that 40min was a good minimum time. I don't know if that's accurate and I know people who don't set anytime to force at all and just passive force, but, I don't think I'd be good at that, and 40 minutes seems safe. Sometimes I get skeptical of individual responses, but overall, I let them talk, and take them at their word. For example, Betty kept giving different answers for her favorite color at first. So, I was skeptical of each answer she gave. But, I think the type of skepticism matters. I was skeptical of her answers, because I thought they were the result of a young tulpa being fickle, and not her not existing. She now says her favorite colors are orange, pink, and orange-pink, consistently. At the beginning, I also worried I was parroting. I pretty sure there were concrete instances of parroting, actually. I'd ask a question, and answer out loud, instead of letting her voice answer. One could argue that maybe she was speaking through my voice, though. Either way, I treated that as "interrupting" her, rather than parroting, and I think that's a better way to see those instances if they aren't happening all the time. Betty saying she was paying attention to Hefty could have been parroting (me generating a response for her based on what was in my line of sight), or just her not knowing what to say. It reminded me of the trope where a character needs to come up with a fake name, so their name becomes the first name they see. I don't think there's a way to know for sure if you're parroting or not so early. What reassured me was not her voice or responses, but her presence. I know that Betty is nice now, but when she was first there, she was eerily silent, and I felt embarrassed, and awkward. When I told her she was parroting and she went silent, I felt pity. When I turned my back on her, I felt like I was being watched. And when she said she was paying attention to Hefty bags, I laughed, pretty hard. Laughter serves a social function, I while I have been able to laugh out loud at a situation I thought of in my head, without the aid of media or other people, I was laughing about how people would react to the situation, and I also happened to be with another person in the same car at the time (who wasn't a participant but their presence could have made me laugh more, as I laugh more at shows with other people in the room, even if they are not laughing). This is to say, I started from a somewhat skeptical perspective (worried about parroting, thinking tulpas may be illusions rather than separate people, and being inspired to start a log of my progress by a r/tulpasforskeptics post), but due to feeling Betty's presence, I could more readily accept what she said as coming from someone else. tl;dr I force a lot because I'm worried, and I've accepted Betty's voice early because I felt her presence early (along with social emotions or cues such as embarrassment, awkwardness, pity, and laughter).
  5. oof. I like bottle caps to max specific pokemon I'm attached to
  6. Friendly is relative in this case, yeah. I prefer SOS chaining because I can just make a Smeargle for infinite chaining and zone out rather than having to sneak, but DexNav is cool too. It's how I got my shiny Camerupt. Hoards are cool and I wish they were in USUM. I ultimately like USUM for its difficulty and world. I also really liked XY. I got tired of it but I'm playing it again with a friend and I can still appreciate it. With ORAS, I liked the contests and DexNav and, I don't remember much else. I'm about to play it again so I'll see. Edit: The big reason I like bottle caps is so I can use individual pokemon I've grow attached to for battling instead of breeding one I'm not attached to.
  7. I don't like when people lump in USUM in with the "bad new games" because it is on a different level than XY, ORAS, and S&S. The game is challenging with level caps and very friendly to competitive players and collectors (SOS chaining, better ways to get shinies, better ways to get hidden ability pokemon, better ways to get legendaries, better ways to get high IV pokemon, bottle caps, better ways to get rare items). The story was good as well, and I personally like the slow and steady pace (I can understand why people don't though). Unfortunately the designs of the new Pokemon were lacking, and there weren't that many new pokemon, which was a shame. Also I'm not saying XY, ORAS, S&S are bad, but if people are going to call the 3D games (and sometimes B&W but that's becoming increasingly unpopular) the "bad modern games," I think it's unfair lump USUM with them. "yeah"
  8. I've been meaning to continue my Pokemon nuzlocke, but I've been busy. And now that I have a day off, I'm sitting around spacing out and doing nothing ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  9. The cuddlefish grew to the size of a small truck and
  10. Stone: It's been a week since my last report, so I think it's time for another one. On the 13th, a walk-in appeared after I was finished a two-hour session of forcing with Betty. You can find a post I made about it here, but I'll summarize it quickly. I argued with her, I chastised her and she dissipated, I asked her to show me a sign she was "real," she sorta did, I did some thinking about having two headmates, I read the responses to my post, and I decided she could stay. Her name is Fluttershy. Now that I've got that out of the way, I will paste my journal entries from the 15th to the 21st. Day 5 - 11/15 Stone: It’s 7:22 AM. I stayed up all night. I heard the sound of jingling (the doors in my house have bells), a door opening or closing, and my cousin saying, “Hello?” I looked around for her, and called her, but she was not there. Then, I heard a sharp, loud inhale from her, which turned into the sound of the heater turning on. My aunt confirmed she didn’t say anything. My cousin confirmed she was upstairs at the time. The sound of geese startled me. This hasn’t happened before. I heard what sounded like slow violin music in the distance. I had already been hearing things, so I tried to convince myself it wasn’t real. It didn’t go away. Then, I turned towards my 2DS realized my perception was coming from my Pokemon Y game. * I was sung to sleep by Fluttershy because I was worried, and remembered two nightmares when I woke up. Day 6 - 11/16 Stone: Today is the day I’ve decided to move my log to LibreOffice, rather than the notes on my phone. I’m recollecting my thoughts about my schedule after meeting a walk-in (Fluttershy) and allowing her to stay. Fluttershy: Hello hi all. Fluttershy here with the latest scoop- (She says more but that's not for here) Stone: Today I will be constructing a plan to personality force Fluttershy and force with Betty. I would also like to plan a schedule that will work for me. Sunday – 60 minutes Betty, 60 minutes Fluttershy, 120 minutes total Monday - 40 minutes Betty, 40 minutes Fluttershy, 80 minutes total Tuesday - 40 minutes Betty, 40 minutes Fluttershy, 80 minutes total Wednesday - 40 minutes Betty, 40 minutes Fluttershy, 80 minutes total Thursday - 40 minutes Betty, 40 minutes Fluttershy, 80 minutes total Friday – 40 minutes Betty, 40 minutes Fluttershy, 80 minutes total Saturday – 90 minutes Betty, 90 minutes Fluttershy, 180 minutes total Today is Sunday, but instead of an active forcing session with Fluttershy, there will be preparation to personality force with her. I will also set alarms every hour on the half to “check up” with Betty and Fluttershy. Starting now. I’ve set it for 4:30 AM. I don’t feel like organizing food again, and the My Little Pony fandom has a vast array of artwork, so I’m going to force with images. I will paste them here, in the same order the traits they represent are listed: 33 links representing different personality traits Ok done. I tried. I am going to make a sub, because I am hungry, and because I will use it when forcing with Betty. Betty: Alright, uh, I hereby swear that I will remind Stone to do his homework after we’re done forcing everyday. He is going to force with us before doing homework so he can pay more attention and not be tired. I think this is good. Stone: Forcing was hard today, as this has been the most tired I’ve ever been while doing it. I’ve been forcing after homework, as I was afraid hanging out with my tulpas would put me in a mood to have fun, and not work, but I cannot force with them effectively in a state like this. From now on, I will force when I wake up, before I do my homework, as sometimes homework takes me a great while to complete (and is draining). I am going to bed now, but when I wake up, I will try this. Day 8 - 11/18 Stone: Actually going to force today! I will jot down my plans. 40 minutes of forcing with Betty - Personality force with Ramune - Vivacious - Eat Skinny Pop - Talk about any exciting plans you have coming up. - Explain the plot of your favorite fairy tale. - Think about a place you’ve traveled recently. What do you like about that place? What do you dislike? - List your favorite apps on your phone. Why are they your favorite? What features would you want to see in the future? - Try to explain the layout of your work, home, or school. - Ask, “What do you want to do?” We started talking about our "favorites." Betty mentioned having a favorite moon. I thought she meant actual moon, but she meant phase of the moon. She said her favorite phase was "new moon." I questioned her, is one cannot even see the new moon. She said something like this: “The new moon is beautiful. You can’t see it, but you know it’s there behind the sky. Just like me. You can’t see me, but you know I’m there behind the air.” Very pretty! Force with Fluttershy - Personality force: stable - Explain your most recent dream - Talk about where you see yourself and your system in five years - If you’re in school, explain the most recent lesson you learned in your favorite class. Day 9 - 11/19 Stone: Forcing plans Betty - Kettle Chips (confident: tough, harder to break) - "What do you want to talk about?" – Force with Fluttershy - PF: Humorous - "What do you want to talk about?" Day 10 - 11/20 Stone: Felt nervous after watching the ominous music video by The Onion. Fictional media never makes me feel nervous, so feeling nervous after a short humorous video I’ve watched before just fine is odd. However, I was woken up by a Covid-19 security alert, and the comments were about the video applying to 2020, so maybe that could be the explanation. Day 11 - 11/21 Stone: I realized forgot to mention I got the beginning of a cold sore earlier in the week. Well, I think it might be fading away now. We’ll see. I’m going to force with Betty for 40min, force with Fluttershy for 40min, and have a 20 minute joint session with the two. Betty Plan - Empathetic - Marshmellows (soft empathy) - Topic: Food/cooking - topic stuff: a chef Stone knows, cooking tutorials, what Stone has cooked, making something together, learn more about the culinary sciences, discuss food (favorites, least favorites), try some random non-forcing food, just talk about food/cooking!, Stone: ask Betty questions and give her ins to the conversation - Ask Betty, “What do you want to talk about?” - Ask Betty, “What do you want to do?” Fluttershy Plan - Incorruptable: https://derpibooru.org/images/1297473?q=flutterbadass - Plans for the day/week - Talk about the grossest food you’ve ever eaten or seen. - “What do you want to talk about?” - “What do you want to do?” Betty really wanted to make bread, but we ended up making fries instead. I let her choose the seasonings. She picked out salt, pepper, garlic powder (she did this more for me, since I like it), onion power, rosemary, and oregano leaves. Eugh. Luckily I had her smell the onion powder and she decided against it, but we used everything else. I, would have removed some of those ingredients if it were me. Also, this seems weird to say, but I had her try to possess me while we were waiting for the fries to cook. I haven't looked into possession at all, and I don't think it's customary to do so this early, but I was bored and wanted to try. What I did was have her visualized form stand in the same pose as our body and move into the body until her visual form was superimposed onto the body. I tried to get her to visualize the body's hands as her hands, the body's feet as her feet, etc. I was probably helping her, but I don't know to what extent. It didn't feel completely like roleplaying/puppeting, but there may have been some. You know how if you're paying enough attention, or are looking in the right spot, you can see your nose? Maybe it looks translucent, or you can see the edges, but the core is transparent? The reason you don't always see your nose is because the brain edits it out, but if you focus, you might be able to see it. I can, anyways (and now that I'm typing this, I can't stop seeing it). Anyways, along with getting her to she her own hands and feet, I tried to get her to see her snout in that way. It seems that really helped align herself with the body. She was still awkward, and I had to monitor and help her at all times. After over 40 minutes of focusing on Betty, I tried my first real joint session with Betty and Fluttershy (sorta). The three have us have all being awake and together before, but this was the first planned, timed session. But why did I say sorta? I was tired and they were pretty much just talking to each other, then I commented on this fact, and Fluttershy suggested that she ask Betty questions instead of me, and that she possess the body. I allowed this and took a back seat. I did not have to baby Fluttershy the same way I babied Betty. As soon as she decided on an anthro form, she was fine. And her voice is more distinct than Betty's, which allowed her to do more of her own thing than Betty, since it was harder for my voice to "seep in." Fluttershy and Betty hung out together for the rest of the "session" and then some. Then, I took control of the body again so I could force with Fluttershy. I talked to her for maybe 15 minutes about stuff. I asked her what she wanted to talk about and she gave responses that seemed less "random," than Betty's, which was interesting. Eventually I kept rejecting topics she wanted to talk about, so she suggest that we play a video game. She looked at the games on my switch and decided to play Minecraft. I created a word for her, she possessed me, and she played while commenting. I would respond. I get worried my tulpas and I focus on other things rather than each other too much during sessions, but I was too tired to hold any sort of good one on one conversation. Early in this report I said I'd start forcing before homework, and I haven't been good about that, given midterms. I hope to do better on that in the future.
  11. Stone: Hello. I was recently talking to my friend about tulpas, I they were asking me how I could stand having two other entities in my head while being introverted. At this stage, they just fade into the background when I need to recharge, and don't usually bother me if I can't focus on them. They asked if I would ever force my tulpas to go away when I needed to recharge, I've never thought about that much, and assumed they would listen, or that we could make some sort of compromise, or that I could take a backseat if they learned to possess. It got me thinking though, since I certainly wouldn't like to force them to take a backseat, but I might feel compelled to due to my nature. To any introverted fronter: what's it like? How do you deal? Also, I put this in questions since it is a question but if it's too open ended for questions, I apologize.
  12. My family laughing at me for buying overpriced popcorn My tulpa
  13. Stone: She looks cute. Kriss, Clem, and Star seem to suit her the best, imo
  14. Stone: Betty and Fluttershy want to talk with someone other than myself, plus I'd like to make up for being super distracted while forcing with them yesterday (was really tired). I'm also curious about your walk-ins and how you've dealt with them. Unfortunately I slept through the entire day yesterday and now have to catch up on homework. I will shoot you a DM once I'm finished, or you can shoot me one and I can once I'm finished
  15. He is very cute. Will be fun to see him grow
  16. It's better than nothing. I'm currently coping with having less time to force than I previously had, but 45 minutes is decent, and I know from experience that you can get stuff done in that amount of time. Wish you well for next week