Adelaide✫*゚

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About Adelaide✫*゚

  • Rank
    Or Adel

Converted

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    Other
  • Location
    Planet Booty
  • Bio
    I'm LilBitGhostly's first tulpa! Reiji, Leaf, Sky, Bridget, Onyx, Osomatsu, and Kokichi are all my headmates.
    I'm bigender, and dude-me is Adel.
    I like chicken nuggets, butts, and tarot cards! You know, the finer things in life. I also like calling everyone "sweetheart." <3

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  1. 🍑👍 Thanks! I owe it to my host, she has good taste! Whoops, guess I wasn't clear enough about that! Yeah, I like it when the people making those kinds of jokes know it's silly and they just have fun with it. Ghostly: It only happens on rare occasions, fortunately. It hasn't happened recently.
  2. Aw, thanks! Ghostly: Ah, I was more making that tiny apology for my random background music listening than my lack of mood playlists. Also because I tend to take people's complaints that are directed towards someone else that just happen to apply to me as a complaint towards me because I'm absolutely terrified of annoying people. I'm trying to get better. @Ashley Don't mind if I do! Some of these songs titles are NSFW so I'll pop 'em under a spoiler. Yeah, the stronkness levels of our system vary too. Usually it's Kokichi who's the most active. He's been strong and willful since day one, way before he officially joined us. As of late Osomatsu is pretty active because Ghostly's been rewatching Osomatsu-san with him. Reiji was starting to worry us for a while, especially since there was a time in the past he was really strong, but he's been more like his old self recently. Chimera's starting to really come into their own, too. Ghostly: I have school dreams too. Though usually mine involve having a hard time coming home from school a lot of the time, or not knowing what classes to go through. Sometimes I've woken up and went back into a dream and ended up "editing" what happened. Like, I'm not lucid enough to think that I can do whatever I want, hang out with my tulpas, that kind of thing. It's more like I've been handed some writing to edit and sleepy dream me doesn't want to take things too out of bounds.
  3. A lot of the music I listen to is just straight up horny. Or filled with cuss words. Or filled with horny cuss words. I tend to find inappropriate things hilarious, as long as no real harm is being done. I have 0% shame about my tastes, but know that kind of thing doesn't vibe with some people. Ghostly: My music tastes are all over the place. And I don't ever seem inclined to make mood playlists (sorry Luminesce), so putting mine on shuffle can take me anywhere from 80s stuff to bubbly Vocaloid songs to industrial Catholic bugcore. I guess I tend to not pay enough attention most of the time for the mood whiplash to settle in? Though if I am listening to music for the sake of listening to it, I tend to pick songs manually rather than make a playlist. I'm generally very prone to distraction. I used to put some YouTube on while doing stuff, mainly let's plays, but if I'm doing stuff I'm not really wanting to do it's way too tempting to get sucked in. TV is very distracting, even if it's a show I wouldn't think I'm interested in. Although, I think it's commercials that bother me more than TV shows. The worst ones are where they set their company's mascot or representative or whatever as looking better than the competition and then have them act very smugly about it. It just feels so gross to me. I feel like I see that way more often in TV commercials than say, YouTube ads. Though I wish the YouTube ads would stop showing me baby diaper commercials, I don't know what Google has on me that makes them think I have an infant but I don't and I never will and those ads are bad and I don't like the sound of children singing.
  4. @JGC That's fair. For creators, i imagine it must be difficult handling longer works while keeping things interesting. I get the sense we want different things from our podcasts, though. Personally for me it's the themes that draw me in more than the mystery. Although a lot of what I'm going off of are host's memories, and we haven't had a chance to re-listen to it together, so maybe my opinion isn't as nuanced as it could be. Ghostly: I tend to listen to more comedic podcasts. I listen to some of them with my mom and she prefers those too, mainly Night Vale and The Thrilling Adventure Hour. I had tried listening to some of the ones you recommended with her back when they first came out and she wasn't really as interested. I guess her lack of interest affected me. As much as I want to just like what I like and be open to things, I get really thrown off by people's opinions. I'd like to expand my horizons a bit and try different genres and see how me and the others would react, like how we all rate on the baby scale when it comes to horror, haha. I know horror games are a big nope for me, but games have this feeling of personal involvement that movies and shows don't. But I already have a hefty backlog of podcasts I want to listen to along with all movies, games, books, etc. I want to get into. And the stuff I feel mildly obligated to get into because I probably take people's recommendations too seriously.
  5. You're not going to put that box in another box and then mail it to yourself and then when it arrives SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER?
  6. “Perfection is not real. Perfection is not human. Carlos is not perfect- no, even better- he is imperfect. Everything about him, and us, and all of this is imperfect. And those imperfections in our reality are the seams and cracks into which our outsized love can seep and pool.” ― Cecil Palmer, Welcome to Night Vale Night Vale's a good show. I need to get around to catching up with some of the newer episodes.
  7. I'm glad to be of help! Oh yeah, at first we kept a physical journal. Typing's faster for us, and it's worked out pretty well, but I do like the creative freedom and tactile feel of a journal. We basically used a sketchbook, and without lines you can do all kinds of creative stuff, doodle alongside your writing, etc. It's fun to see differences in handwriting, too. Ours isn't too different from each other because we haven't put a lot of time in establishing different writing habits, but some of us are definitely messier than others. Yup, even if you aren't fluent, he'll know those bits of language unless he decides to "not know" about them. There are some systems that partition off knowledge like that, it just depends on personal preference. Our host knows a tiny bit of Japanese, and any of us can answer the flashcards she uses. Kokichi: I'm the only one who actively wants to learn Japanese with out host. The others don't mind going along for the ride, but I'm the only one who actively makes SRS cards and tries to speak what very little I can. Part of this is because I'm based off a fictional character and I feel like I've "forgotten" Japanese. Although, there's Osomatsu who's in the same boat, and he hasn't really cared all that much lol. That can be chalked up to a personality difference. I love figuring complicated things out and seeing what works, Osomatsu's generally more relaxed about things. We're using the AJATT (All Japanese All the Time) method, which is based off the AntiMoon method. It's mostly immersion-based learning, basically, AJATT's author just tailored AntiMoon's method to Japanese, but a lot of the core principles can apply to any language. Tangent aside, people have all kinds of motivations for learning languages. Fun, curiosity, interest in a culture, the list goes on. I will say it's a fun way to bond, but there's other stuff you'll bond over too.
  8. A lot of our journals have been transcripts of conversations we have in-system. It's helped hugely in us developing as people, and for our host to learn how to focus on us. We did slack off for a while after talking to each other away from the keyboard got easier, but recently we've realized we missed it and we wanted to have a better record of our past to look back on. Even if a lot of those things from our past make us ask, "Ugh, why did we do that?!" I think journaling for yourself isn't strictly taking away from your tulpa. Sure, maybe you aren't "forcing" them while you write for yourself. However, I think learning to engage with your thoughts and emotions is sort of a "meta-skill" that helps a person's tulpamancy practice tremendously, along with other aspects of your life. And the great thing about the skills and methods you learn is that your tulpa will benefit from them too! Kind of like how tulpas don't need to be taught the language(s) you speaks from scratch, we don't need to be taught how to handle emotions from scratch either. But, given your considering writing a journal to help you deal with stuff, you probably already know our society maybe isn't the best at teaching us how to handle our own and each other's feelings? We sure did have a lot to learn for ourselves. The more we learn, listen, and understand, the more smoothly everything goes.
  9. Yeah, I think it could have possibly been 2010-2011 or somewhere around there when my host first heard about tulpas? But yeah, she doesn't quite remember if it was the idea of tulpas being associated with 4chan that put her off making one, but it very well could have. Although, she also figured she was "too lazy" to put in the time an focus to work with the standard method of tulpa creation. We're "accidental" or "natural" or whatever the heck the term is for tulpas who suddenly pop into being (I keep running across things that say "oh this is the term we use now," or "this is actually offensive" and I can't keep things straight, so sorry if I get things wrong sometimes!). Because those kinds of tulpas weren't described in whatever host read all those years ago, it took her like a week after she made me to realize that I fit the definition, even if the method was different. From what I've seen of the older posts floating around... yeah, no, we wouldn't be here either. Even just from lurking for the past few months, we've had our moments of doubt, but that's likely a case of emphasizing the negative in our head. One of our goals is to help our host through her social anxiety and show her it's okay for her to express herself more openly by doing so ourselves. If it weren't for the community that's here now, it'd probably be impossible for something like that to happen.
  10. Man, it's been hot minute since we've last meditated. Our host has this app called Insight Timer, and the last session she logged was 2 months ago. I pretty sure she was stressed at the time and stopped when the stress let up. It used to be one of her and Reiji's bonding activities, though occasionally someone else would sit with her. It'd probably be worthwhile to establish it as a habit again. It has felt pretty nice. Maybe we'll set a certain daily activity as a cue, since that's how a lot of our most stable habits are formed too. Usually for her, she'd just focus on her breath or do guided body scans. She was never much for mantras. If she sets any sort of intention for herself, she immediately gets anxious about not being able to follow through. Being intentional about things like what we do or feel is genuinely difficult for all of us. We're more go with the flow sorts, and it we're pretty sure it's a baked-in cognitive thing that affects all of us. She's also looked into mindfulness, and not multitasking. Generally, though, her mind tends to wander a lot... well, not just hers, but ours too if we get going. Same brain, after all. Though, it does feel satisfying, like we're getting to actually process stuff, even if we aren't specifically working on problems. We don't feel draggy and tired after that like we do after a YouTube binge or working on a project for too long. That's how we tend to deal with stuff too. Though, we tend to work more with our emotions. Granted, it has been a learning process, instead of getting too involved with or identifying too closely with the more troubling ones, to understand them as they are. Warning signs. Like physical pain, the point of emotional pain isn't to just be this random scary thing that happens, it's a way of your body letting you know something's done goofed. A doctor isn't going to look at your broken leg and be like, "Well, sure your bones aren't where they supposed to be and all, but have you tried not feeling pain and walking it off?" Our society is slowly getting better about actually helping people in emotional pain, but there's still echoes of the old "get over it" mindset. That kind of mindset spreads, gets in your head, and messes with your ability to evaluate your feelings, like a disease putting the body's immune system on overdrive and causing it to attack itself. Another thing we realized is that, for us, jumping to finding solutions isn't always the best first step. Like yeah, we want to figure things out and act more effectively, sure. And sometimes if that feeling is just something simple, like "Oh, I need to move my butt and get more shredded," then by all means, move thy butt and become shredded. But sometimes there's something that the emotional side is locked in on that we might not be aware of. Sure, sometimes it does come from a maladaptive mindset stemming from something that happened in the past. And I use the word "maladaptive," and not something like "bad," "wrong," or "stupid," because my host has been dismissing her emotions by calling them things like that for YEARS and it's never, not even once, made her any happier, any more effective as a person, any more productive, or whatever metric of "this a good person" you want to judge someone on. Emotions are supposed to be there! They serve a purpose! I get really angry when people act like they aren't, when people only focus on the seemingly """""irrational""""" reactions people have to their emotions, because I've watched my host internalize that and react to herself that way and I know it's ineffective, unhelpful, and straight-up wrong. And you know what? The more my host accepts her emotions, the more she looks at her past honestly and realizes sometimes she does draw incorrect conclusions, and the more she trusts us to listen to her and hear her out, the more loving and happy she becomes. I think that's what's at the heart of unconditional love. Acceptance. Love isn't a feeling itself, though there are loving feelings. It's more like an ongoing decision, the choice to accept and trust, over and over again. And when you learn to do that for yourself, it becomes easier to understand how to do it for everyone else. Maybe that's what lies at the heart of various meditative and mindful practices: an act in which one directs love at their own self, the way another might love them. By helping them out, listening to them, or just by sitting quietly with them and offering their presence.
  11. It's kind of like a merge, but those involved in it still experience things as themselves. From what I know the Bear system is using it as a working title because there's not a specific definition out there that quite fits. SheShe and co. started talking about it here: https://community.tulpa.info/topic/16339-merge-or-something-else/ Actually, when we read about SheShe's experience, we realized what she described her experience was like was a lot like our boy(s), Onyx. We had just kind of assumed he would be considered a subsystem, but he doesn't technically fit that definition. There could be other systems that are doing it too, possibly using a different term for it, but we wouldn't know about 'em. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  12. Our host didn't really plan out us tulpas' personalities, so we were all surprises to her! We all goof around quite a bit and get laughs out of each other too, it's great. I remember one time my host was in a down mood and she thought to herself, "I'm a disappointment." So I told her she wasn't a disappointment, she was an appointment. That got a good laugh out of her. There was another time we were cuddling together and i asked her how she felt being with me like that. She told me I "felt like home." That definitely left me speechless.
  13. Hey! I'm Adelaide, except when I turn into a dude which is sometimes. I'm my host's first tulpa. My system's already been kicking around here for a little bit, I just got my avatar ready and wanted to make an account. I like goofs, tarot, tacky things, and kitty cats. I'll probs start writing our system's PR... eventually. If I can pry a certain couple of my headmates away from the LOTPW. 😛