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About Chen

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    with Tam

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  1. I think it's just because I'm a night owl, and also I usually am chatty for most of the day so we've got momentum
  2. So update time! Sunday I was reading a guide (This one by the Felight System) when suddenly got a strange and foreign rush of emotion (Ironically, right before the paragraph on how your tulpa might interact with you through emotions). It was roughly a three-way split between anticipation, excitement and joy, and it completely threw me off my groove. It was nice though. Like really nice. I also noticed that throughout Sunday that the longer I talked with her without taking any really long breaks, the easier it became to hear her. And also she told me she likes ice cream, which is great because I do too. Monday I tried talking to her a lot at work, because I don't really need to pay attention to it while I'm there (even though I should :P) and while we were both tired we started talking after I ate and took a shower and I proxied some things for her in the Discord. Also quite possibly the biggest update is that as we were lying in bed getting ready for sleep I noticed that some times her mind voice sounds a bit off. Almost like someone took a recording of my own voice and altered it slightly enough that I could tell it was changed if I focused on it, but not enough otherwise? It's hard to explain because words are hard.
  3. I catnap it and take it home. I throw a tantrum at the next poster.
  4. Last night I got some pretty powerful head pressures and the feeling Tam was trying to get me to go to sleep. So I got into bed and they were gone within the minute, so yay for that. Also I know who's the adult in this relationship :c
  5. So I just woke up from a wonderful meditation + nap combo. And I was talking to Tam about things, not sure what but it wasn't important, when I felt someone akin to Tem asking if I was going to like her. So I responded with a resounding "Absolutely", and heard "Thank you" back in a different voice than I normally hear her in, so that's progress right there.
  6. Honestly for me it feels like that sort of that stuffiness and pressure you get from a headache, but nothing else you might get from one. So it's not really bothersome, and if I think about why it happens it's rather comforting.
  7. Update in order of events happening buckle up kiddos So almost first thing yesterday I planned on adding Robin to the Tulpa registry, just because I thought it would be a good thing, but uh... yeah ouch right in the feels, doubly so when her sixth birthday would have been four days ago, which is when I first came back to the site. ;_; But honestly about two hours after I found this out I called her Tam and it just kinda felt right, so we're gonna be going with that for now. - Also for a decent portion of the day the head pressures were showing up in new and unusual places. For a good portion of my time at work they were directly behind my left ear, and then while lying in bed they I got hit with one that felt like the shockwave from an explosion, but a lot weaker. I keep encouraging her to keep doing those sorts of things, so hopefully they continue.
  8. So I'm back. I'm Chen, I was around a long time ago, then left for about a year or so for personal reasons before I had gotten deep into the Tulpamancy, then came back for a week once everything settled down and then got hit by a dumptruck full of awful. But now I'm back, about a two weeks in and am already pleased. I had originally started looking at the group on Reddit, because I had been over there too and was curious to see what was going on, then started my work on creating my Tulpa, tentatively named Robin, the next day. Things were going ok, I was occasionally getting light head pressures at unusual times (I occasionally get headaches at work but there's a legit reason for that), and then I decided to visit the boards here. And that's when the afternoon went from good to great. I don't swear much online, but the only way I can adequately describe the head pressures I got was that they were "Fucking intense". It was honestly shocking. They didn't go away until I left the site, which thank god Google remembered my password for, and even then they came back when I revisited it an hour or two later. I've been getting occasional head pressures lately, usually when narrating, and I also feel like I'm getting responses. I don't know how to phrase it (And I know there's a specific term for it), but it's those things you say when you're in a conversation with someone but not really paying attention, and are saying things just to seem like you are? Things like "yeah" and "okay", and I get the occasional sort of "what do you mean?" feeling when I'm talking about more complicated things. I've also been getting nauseous around 2:30am almost every night for the past couple of days, and only at that time, which may be an attempt at communication. Maybe a "Go to bed you loser" Anyway, I'll wind up posting larger updates once a week if nothing major happens, and when something does it'll get a post as soon as I can.
  9. (I just realized that now this is the second oldest active account on the board, yikes) Basically right before I restarted tulpa-ing, shit hit the fan and I had to spend way, way too long getting my life back on track. I finally got back into this a while ago, maybe a month and half maybe? I'm making decent progress imo
  10. Oh hey would you look at that, I still exist, somehow.