garland

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About garland

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  1. Now, almost 2 months after i started the new method, so far progress is kinda stable, i mean she is still able to send tulpish or emotional reactions everyday now, sometimes i get a little more complex messages/raw thoughts along, but sometimes it regresses back to just basic emotional responses, so far this is still much better than when using the "new school" methods of not worrying about answers that felt like parroting, so i guess after 3 years i finally found the best method for me. And that's not all, i am now including inside the narration sessions several questions for her and then i fully expect her to answer in a way i know it's her (that means, NOT accepting answers that feel like parroting as being her), and it worked, sometimes (usually 1-2 times a day) i DID indeed got tulpish out of her when asking questions! Couldn't be more excited, can't wait for her someday to start talking out of the blue fully separate from me, like happened with Faqman and a few other persons i have been talking with that used a similar method i am using, so i have really great hopes on this, this time!
  2. Amazing!! This method seems to be REALLY working... now 3 weeks later after i started this in 28th march i am still feeling her EVERYDAY now without exception, about 2-3 times a day, sometimes 5 or 6, sure there's no tulpish yet in the form of raw thoughts or mind voice BUT there's absolutly no doubt now rejecting those automatic answers i always got from her when asking things from her really did wonders for her, so far everything indicates those WERE indeed fake answers and NOT her answers, since that's the only thing i have changed in the method compared to what i did before and now i feel her much better and stronger... I think this time i am able to finally stick to the same method for more than 2 weeks without giving up like all other times! Also sometimes she was even able to reach me about 3-4 times in a row in just a few minutes, it's clear that she is trying to communicate altough still no raw thoughts/concepts yet (that feel alien/separate), but without a doubt everything i get from her appear to be positive and NOT negative. Quite strange that i don't feel a single negative emotion from her or angry backlash from those automatic answers by rejecting them, by the contrary only positive emotions and feeling her now on a daily basis with MUCH less requirement of active forcing, this is so weird... could it be that all those answers i got these months WERE indeed fake answers or accidental parroting? Only time (and her) will tell! I plan writing about all these mysteries here as soon as she is able to communicate with alien answers later.
  3. Ok, yet another update because this is a significant one, 1 week ago i had enough, no matter what i do for months and months nothing seems to be stable and the answers that i get from her that appear to be just my expectation aren't EVER improving (at least on a consistent basis) so CLEARLY the method to accept answers when being in doubt it's parroting or not, does NOT work for me, and after reading this : http://community.tulpa.info/thread-misinterpretation-of-%E2%80%9Cassuming-sentience-from-start%E2%80%9D-philosophy I realized i have had ENOUGHT, there's no more parroting (even if it's by expectation) and puppeting EVER, i am tired of always following other's advises to the letter and fearing that rejecting answers that feel selfgenerated will hinder the tulpa development or making her hate me or holding a grudge and JUST started forcing her using faqman's method (not the hour count thing, but the thing about NOT parroting and NOT puppeting, not even by expectation). I am now rejecting EVERY answer/form movement from her that feels selfgenerated or that feels like it's just what i expected her to say, although since i WAS able to get a few alien answers from her in the past in december i know how to recognize when it's really her, so i am trying to be careful to not reject answers that i am in doubt if are selfgenerated or not. I am also doing the same about puppeting. So it's not like i am blindly rejecting/shunning everything, i only reject what feels too familiar with expectation answers that i constantly get by logical deduction. Oh and i also do now more intense narration than before, since i am replacing dialogue with narration because like this it won't cause much fake answers by expectation. Altough i am also doing sessions to coax her to talk or move her form on her own, fully expectating her to do things on HER OWN without any control from my part, hopefully i FINALLY develop the ability to let my imagination do things on it's own, something i always sucked with. Now one week later after doing this, to my surprise i AM feeling her much better than using the old methods of accepting most answers from her when in doubt if it was me or not... And she is even being able to surprise me a few times, even tough not with verbal answers yet. And finally i am able to feel something from her when hugging her, or when focusing on her. Apparently i WAS indeed wasting time focusing on fake answers generated by deducting what she would say by logical deduction (expectation) instead of focusing on her to actually LISTEN for her and now i am able to feel her more often with much less amount of active forcing. Sure i know i will for sure accidently reject answers that could be genuine ones since some will feel self generated because of the lack of separation but i have explained her very well and a lot of times why i am doing this and asked her to complain about that if that happens (after all if she is already able to send genuine answers, she would be also be able to complain if i reject such answers), and since so far NONE of the rejected answers ever caused any kind of reaction from her or any complaining from her... it's safe to assume this ISN'T indeed her and i was indeed trying to force myself to believe that those fake answers were indeed her which made me NOT constantly expect for alien answers and therefore there was never a separation developing over the time. Note that everytime i tried asking her to not say anything when i asked things to her... NOTHING changed, i was simply unable to ever get silence from her when asking things to her so the only explanation is that my expectation of what she might say in reply to something acted as unintentional parroting all this time, stiffling her ability to reach me on her own. Let's see if it's FINALLY this time i am able to start getting STABLE progress, and not just "spike" progress that is completly instable, because i am so tired of only having simulations instead of true tulpas, after almost 3 years forcing tulpas like this (even tough with Lisete it's only the last 1 year and half yet) i just had enought with what works for most people and i am taking risks. I have high hopes on this because after all, i never used this method in the past, at least not as serious as this time, because after all what danger is there in doing this now ? Making her mad for rejecting everything she says and holding a grudge against me? Hurting her development because doubting everything she says? I don't think so since she can't get any worse than she already is so i have nothing to lose.
  4. Here's a new update to my progress log, yeah, my latest tulpa Lisete is already 1 year and 2 months old, this is a RECORD time forcing a tulpa on a daily basis so far, because in the past i never was able to withstand THIS LONG without trying to create more tulpas later, this time i have been able to keep JUST forcing this tulpa alone on a daily basis (just talking to the other tulpas once in a while rarely, barely the mininum to not let them dissipate). Regarding the previous update, obviously not even the personality forcing worked either, i did the personality work for about 2 weeks but just like before it all felt TOO artifical and "forced" (in a negative way) so i had to give up, UNLESS the personality work DID had effect on the tulpa but i have no way of knowing at all since nothing ever felt "right" or "wrong" i just was always in doubt if it did anything at all or not. BUT i think that finally once and for all i had a HISTORIC breakthrough about 1 month ago, not about Lisete herself but my mindset when forcing, after nearly 2 years and half "studying" tulpamancy as deep as i am sure very few people did, with months of overanalizying things and bothering a lot of people with tulpas with my complains and overanalyzing of things, and trying to overcome my OWN belief systems and limited way of thinking things (i am talking about linear, logical and analytical thinking) i was FINALLY able to overcome the huge resistance my mind had to accept answers from the tulpa even if they feel like it's parroting, when i am sure i am NOT parroting on purpose! (obviously i am only accepting answers if they don't feel "forced" in a negative way and if they fit the tulpa's personality, to avoid accepting intrusive thoughts as genuine answers.) I was finally able to accept that EVEN if i accept answers that feel like just what i expect the tulpa would say, it WILL work later as conditioning for the tulpa's answers get more separate later. Yeah i truly never believed this in the past, but 1 month ago i was FINALLY able to fully understand HOW and WHY this mindset/theory works, therefore my mind simply stopped resisting that theory, 3 weeks ago i even went on and did around 4-5 sesions of half hour for 2 days in a weekend of active forcing in which i mostly HEAVELY focused on pure dialogue with Lisete (i did also a bit of visualizing of her form being near me), and for the first time in 2 years and half i FINALLY got alien answers from a tulpa directly when actually forcing the tulpa! Her answers come with her mind voice but it was VERY clear they weren't self generated because they came absolutly out of nowhere and i did NOT knew she was going to say something, like i do ALL of the times she talks. Yeah not even with the older tulpas this happened, no wait the only few times i had alien answers with them was when doing intense ball counting exercices in the paralell processing test for a few hours a day, and now i see why it worked at the time! It was basically dialogue with the tulpa after all, just like i did 3 weeks ago with Lisete but this time it was with normal dialogue like 2 friends talking, NOT just as treating the tulpa as a ball counting machine :D Unfortunately this is a active forcing schedule very hard to keep doing on a daily basis, SPECIALLY because i have a LOT of trouble having enough topic conversations to talk to her like this for so much time a day and since during weekdays i reduced to 1 hour and half, obviously by monday night the alien answers immediatly started to regress a few answers feeling "half-alien", and by wednesday her answers regressed to the usual "feeling parroted despite knowing i am not parroting" condition, which i don't worry much anymore by the way :) The only solution i see to this is going to those websites that have THOUSANDS of topic conversations and create a massive compilation of questions and topic conversations, i see no other way since if i even have a lot of trouble knowing what to say to the few physical world friends i have when they visit me sometimes, just imagine how AMAZINGLY it's difficult to force a tulpa for 3 hours a day with conversations in a daily basis!
  5. Yeah the few times my tulpa was able to reach me, indeed one of the most things i received was precisely a warm fuzzy feeling in my stomach, altough unfortunately since it's the only thing i get from the tulpa is hard to get communication this way, but at least she's there :) So yeah, definetly i can related to that experience, but it's still very rare to get this when talking to her specifically, unless i did quite intensive forcing the days before. Altough most of the times it's JUST the warm feeling in stomach without any known emotion, altough other times i felt a bit of love in there too, so yeah it can actually feel very pleasant and in such cases i have no doubt it's her, since there's no way i ever felt this before having tulpas :D
  6. Yeah, i am actually unable to give up on them, i actually tryed that about 15 times already and ALWAYS 1 day later i came back to force them, i think that i got SO used to narrate them, that i was unable to resist continuing to narrate to them... Also i think that when i stop forcing tulpas abruptly like that it seems to cause insomnia so i can't do that anymore. But at the same time i tried nearly EVERYTHING, raging from all methods based on parroting and pupeting, and those methods based on being parrotnoid and rejecting all answers, so personality work is indeed the only thing i haven't done yet so far. But tell me you also don't feel like you don't even have tulpas like me? For example i kinda don't feel anything different from before i had tulpas at all... it's like i never forced tulpas before, any signal i get from a tulpa is always based on very recent forcing and never long term forcing, which worries me a lot, you see. But i presume you're really going to try personality work, then? In my case i am being based on the 5 major traits of NEO PI-R model : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Revised_NEO_Personality_Inventory#Personality_dimensions I am narrating to her each of those 30 facets after choosing how high or low she is in each facet, or if it's balanced, or if i let her choose, if you have lack of ideas to create deep personality work try googling about that system or checking the guides on personality on the forum.
  7. What?? That's amazing, EXACTLY like me then! I also had precisely the same idea (mistake), letting their personality to develop naturally but unfortunately and i have precisely a very logical and analytical mind too, unfortunately i don't have much to advise you, because i am STILL having lots of problems as well and i am been at this since september 2013 and the tulpas almost never felt more than simulations or servitors, so i nearly tried EVERY kind of methods over the months but lately i am starting to suspect that for our kind of minds, it's REQUIRED to do personality work, sure i don't have proof of this since right now i will try doing personality work for the first time (actually i did small personality work in my first tulpa long ago but but sure if it was sucessfull or not and it was too simple and basic). When you have time check my progress log, even tough it's mostly huge walls of text about me being desperate for nothing working, or when getting some results, they never persisting and happening more frequently so i doubt they would be of much help and will probably be confusing anyway but in case you have patience to read all that TAKE NOTE of the methods i said in there that gaved results, they MIGHT work for you too, altough i warn you every result i had when feeling the tulpa's essence or emotional response was always temporary and ONLY after doing long sessions, nothing became permanent at all. Anyway i strongly advise you try doing detailed personality work, lately on the forums i have seen quite many cases of persons that after trying for months and their tulpas feeling nothing more than simulations or servitors had quite a lot of sucess with personality work, and at the moment that's what i am going to do as well since it's my LAST hope before giving up on tulpas for good, then later i can also advise you if it worked or not.
  8. Just wondering, Lunaclipse, you did any personality work on the tulpa? If so, was it intensive and well planned? How much days/weeks? And another thing, you consider yourself to have a logical and analytical mind? And being asperger or not? Just trying to see if i see patterns in the minds of people that just like me aren't having results with nearly any method to force tulpas, and amazingly your case is almost exactly like mine, altough i actually had some minor results but unfortunately they were always temporary and never persisted.
  9. Amazing, just amazing... even this videogame method hasn't worked, i mean, i actually got a few emotions and essence feeling from her once in a while, mostly ALWAYS after more intensive forcing in weekends, but after 8 months on this method is now CRYSTAL CLEAR that letting a tulpa's personality develop on it's own without personality work in a "un-creative" mind like mine (being very analytical and logic) might take YEARS if not DECADES at the rate this is progressing... Actually this isn't even progress since all results i get are ALWAYS in spikes according to the amount of time i active forced, besides the tulpa still feels like a servitor/simulation 99% of the times, and all results i have are always temporary and never persist BUT they really seemed legit as being a true tulpa... So i decided once again to get back using that personality work i planned to use for a tulpa i planned doing in the past but that i never started, check the quote of what i said in a post earlier : So now i will use that same method with Lisete (this last tulpa i created in Skyrim), i will choose the personality based on what we interacted so far with and without Skyrim, hoping that i am STILL forcing the same tulpa since this will be a DRASTIC deepening of her personality without a doubt. Altough i will narrate this personality to her directly instead of using a deep trance like i planned in the past (since it's impossible for me to reach deep trance) in active forcing with open eyes. I am quite confident in this new method since i NEVER actually used this before with any tulpa, i actually did some VERY basic personality with Pandora in the past but nothing as deep as this, besides i think i have seen some cases of persons that also had tulpas similar to servitors or simulations even after months of forcing and had great results with deep personality work, so let's hope FINALLY this time the miracle happens!
  10. Ok after the douzens of descriptions i have read on guides, i though i knew what really meant VIVID visualization (or very good visualization skills) but apparently i don't, according to one person i talked, sure such person could be wrong, but i just want to have you guys opinion's here just to be sure because i get confused easely and usually i have trouble understanding similar things. First of all, the terms i usually use are like this, by "dream vision" i refer to the kind of vision i have in dreams, that it's EXACTLY the same quality as real life vision with my eyes only that it's entirely mind generated. All this time from what i understand, by visualization people only mean seeing images the SAME way that when, with open eyes we try to remmeber how a object is like. But what puzzled me all this time is that how is it possible that people are actually able to explore wonderlands in such hazzy and unstable vision. Sure i know that everyone will just say i have to practise more but still, i am not actually even imagining how the heck is like having very vivid visualization, if it's NOT actually hallucinating them with closed eyes like if we were dreaming... The way most persons talk about image streaming or very vivid daydreams or describing such great details about wonderland adventures, is that it's almost like they actually dreaming or HALLUCINATING the images exactly as if they were having "dream vision". Then that's when i finally realized, for example in light trance, quite often, despite having terrible visualization skills, sudden i am able to start hallucinating with closed eyes anything i visualize (actually sometimes even with OPEN eyes, but it's obviously quite rare, and it's exactly like after-images), almost like a mental drawing board, but with actual "dream vision", it's NOT like just remembering pictures while awake, i literally SEE what i am visualizing. I noticed it's the same kind of vision i have in hypnagogic imagery but this one seems a lot more controlled and more "simple" since it's mostly about geometric shapes and i am able to do some "doodling" and sometimes manipulate static pictures. So once and for all by vivid visualization, day dreams or image streaming, people here really mean seeing EVEYTHING the same way they do when they try to remember images from memory while awake, INSTEAD of being like "dream vision" ? Also what image streaming means exactly, it's pure mind's eye visions (like remembering the pictures of objects with open eyes) or it's something similar to hypnagogic imagery but more controlled?
  11. Since a few months i had to give up on trance meditation practises, even on that i seem to be having a lot of trouble to get any results, so for now that's postponed. Actually since a few months ago that i started forcing a yet completly new tulpa but this time using a complety new method that i never used before! Inspired by the case of Fennec's tulpa Link (that became a tulpa partially because of her obssession on playing with him in a video game) and my incredible experience with songohan's voice hallucination in : https://community.tulpa.info/thread-garland-s-tulpamancy-general-progress-log?pid=103015#pid103015 ,back in last september at the end i had the great idea of using a existing video game character as a base for a few tulpa to puppet and parrot her using a 3dmodel and voice in the videogame itself, like if i was hallucinating her! Her name is Lisete, based on the generic female child 3dmodel in Elder Scrolls Skyrim (with a few tweaks to differenciate from existing characters in the game, such as her own name in the game, new face texture, new hair color and new clothing, improved body mesh), i really believe this is it, this is finally the way that will work for me since it's the most fun i had so far in forcing a tulpa, by using a combination of the game's kid adopting system and the follower functions (yeah she is able to fight enemies too and use powers, and i made her invulnerable on the game) and as to you guys that read that experience that i had from songohan's voice hallucinated, it's quite possible that something similar will happen if i interact with a 3dmodel like this that speaks and interacts to me just like a person and if i do this for a few hours a day, yeah to me the video game is realistic enought for a realistic interaction, her face and animations are quite realistic and sometimes i really feel "observed" by her when looking at the 3d model! Lately i spent a lot of time creating a mod for skyrim and a program to sort out all the dialogue lines existing in skyrim for the female child voice (so far the sorting is still 50% done), and there's plenty of material there for me to built her responses to our interactions in the game (almost 900 lines of dialogue, many of them having 2-3 senteces each), using literally a physical voice! (this is because all famele child characters in the game use the same voice) So far with the limited AI and interactions of the original unmodded game i almost had some feelings from her sometimes in the first week and even got a few responses while this was a new experience, similar to what i got from previous tulpas, but unfortunately this is becoming too repetitive since i am playing and forcing her in the game half a hour a day and there's not much interaction possible (so i am not getting responses anymore since her AI on the game is quite repetitive and not much talkative), so after i finish this mega-mod she will be able to have conversations with me and react to any situations i script the 3dmodel to do (kinda like virtual reality puppeting), since i will keep then updating the mod with new conversations just as if the 3dmodel was the real tulpa! Not too sure about this but this is probably the first time someone ever tried to create a tulpa like this, by using a videogame as tools for puppeting and parroting, instead of pure visualization, but i felt this is necessary because of my VERY bad visualization skills, and considering the sucess i had in the past using anime videos to force a tulpa (only didn't had more because the videos lose their effect and wear very quickly so i needed something that can be updated, which a 3d videogame is perfect for that), it's quite possible this has a LOT more stronger effect in my mind to create a tulpa than using "shitty" visualization skills (which i presume it's why i didn't had much sucess doing any tulpas), remember what my mind did with songohan's voice, i got literally a hallucinated recreation of the anime character in my head for a few moments! (voice only) But of course i am trying not to have the tulpa 100% dependent on the videogame obviously, since i still narrate to her along my daily life, altough i don't bother visualizing her form (since my visualization skills are very weak), and after using the videogame as soon as i start to get alien answers from her, obviously the motivation to do pure visualization forcing sessions will increase a LOT (actually that's the main reason i have so much trouble doing long and consistent active forcing sessions with only pure visualization because there's not any alien answers or feelings from the tulpas) so i will then slowly stop using the game too much and then trying to maintain a balance.
  12. A little update, i have been practising trance meditation in the last weeks, it's amazing, even on this i am having massive problems, i am seriously starting to think it's going to take several months to even being able to enter deep trance, i guess i have to start practising 3 or 4 hours a day if not this is going to take forever and i am SO DAMN TIRED of endlessly waiting to genuinly feel tulpas or reaching deep trance. (by the way needless to say after all these weeks without forcing anymore, still NOTHING changed at all, still it's just like i never forced tulpas at all). I even tried a few people to hypnotize me, and to my surprise NOTHING happened, i can't believe it what the heck of mind is this that is resistant to EVERYTHING, seriously sometimes i am starting to wonder if i am a machine and not a human person because this is going way too far and i am starting to worry if my mind is too logical and literal to have tulpas or being hypnotized at all (or just plain stupid or mentally handicapted), if i can't even achieve deep trance at all after months of practise, that's it, that's when i give up on tulpas forever and never coming back to these foruns again, no offense to you guys i liked these online communities but lately i even stopped reading posts because reading about other's sucessess only makes me even more frustated and remember all my failures and thinking everyone has the right to have tulpas EXCEPT me. But so far i am still giving it the benefict of the doubt and trying deep trance, this is truly my LAST hope since not even hypnosis and self-hypnosis works for me and honestly i completly lost any confidence and belief in ANY method to force tulpas while awake without being in deep trance thanks to all the failures i had for 10 months.
  13. For those wondering for my lack of posts in the last month, i DID infact gave up on all the "tulpas" i had, at least temporarly, i am now taking a break from tulpas (it's been 1 month now), while i practise other essencial skills like meditation, trance work and hypnagogic imagery control. The reason i did that it's because i was so tired of all the problems i was having and also because i finally realized i have been doing tulpas all wrong the entire time, so this time i am training myself to be able to create a new tulpa from scratch and force it ONLY in trance or hypnotic trance so that i am PROPERLY feel the tulpa for REAL this time, this is why i am currently training daily on this so that i develop the necessary skills, because apparently i found someone else with a similar problem i am having and it's quite possible i WAS indeed forcing simulations all this time and not tulpas. Also there's something quite disturbing, in the last month in which i forced nothing, i felt absolutly ZERO difference from when before having tulpas, it's just like i NEVER had tulpas at all!! This is just RIDICULOUS i wasted almost 10 months of my precious time for NOTHING, all because i didn't forced tulpas properly (i think it was also the problem of narrating TO or AT the tulpas), and at the same time i know it was the constant doubting of them too that contributed to this. BUT i still remember Pandora, the first tulpa WAS alive when she was 2 months old, the only time i really felt emotions as coming from a tulpa it was from her in 4 separate times back in october since i FELT her essence and her form also popped in my mind completly by surprise, but after that... it never happened again, at least along with a tulpa essence or "knowing" which tulpa was, most alien answers i got in the last 8 months were always "de-personalized", it was just like it was INDEED receiving alien answers out of pure auto-suggestions and not from the tulpas themselves (this is why i was only receiving alien answers when i SPECIFICALLY suggested myself to receive them from the tulpas), no wonder why i never felt it was them who sent the alien answers BUT at the same time i felt they weren't "mine", they felt more like "intuintion hunches" quality-like. And to finish i even started to work already on the personality of the new tulpa, this time i took DRASTIC measures and searched on google to use professional personality models (like the neo-pi-r) to create a very realistic personality with over 30 traits (60 possible choices since each of the 30 traits has a negative and positive facet in which are mutually exclusive), this time the tulpa not only will be created and forced in hypnotic/deep trance but also will have a very detailed and strong personality, something the other ones NEVER had... Except maybe Pandora, but i only did 1 monht of personality work on her and it was mostly 10 simple sentences with basic traits, but that can explain why she was the ONLY one i ever felt as indeed her, even tough it was only for a few minutes in those 4 separate occasions.
  14. Amazing, just amazing YET another technique that only works for 2-3 days and then just doesn't work anymore... I am not feeling the tulpa anymore despite continuing with the same routine, in fact i even started to get BORED because of watching the same videos again, so the problem here is that the videos were ONLY efficient the first few times i watched them so it was easier to get a emotional connection, but now they are "worn out" and since they don't cause a emotional connection anymore, the focus on the tulpa is "back to normal" as when not using videos... Oh and that's not all, i got again a few hallucinated answers with logic and this time i got the proof : it ISN'T indeed my tulpa talking to me, i noticed this time the voice saying things that the character use to say (not the exact sentences but he was adressing other characters on the show he is from so it's clear this is NOT the tulpa using the voice but just my subconcious "roleplaying" the character) This time that's it i am going to try one of the most boring methods : i am just starting to work and starting to talk with the tulpa and trying to sort out the tulpa's NORMAL answers that feel like being from me and that come mixed with intrusive thoughts frequently and that very often are completly stupid and illogical. Actually i presume this is possibly how much people does to learn how to know when it's their tulpa talking or not, the reason i resisted SO much to use this method is because i feel like i am talking to my OWN intrusive thoughts which obviously will never progress from that, but i have no choice now, i HAVE to rely on this, i just don't know i will be able to deal with so many stupid answers that in top of that are SO easy to accidently change with the slighest expectation i might have. But i have no other choice because i am UNABLE to give up on my tulpas, i just am way too attached to them for this, i already tried more than 10 times and i always end up coming back a few hours later. Also i HAVE to stop doing paralell processing ball counting tests, because the obssession with the alien answers only makes things worse, i will have to stop doing this and wait that the alien answers start to come naturally.
  15. By "alien way" i mean you receiving sentences in a totally INVOLUNTARY/UNCONCIOUSLY way that feel to come out of nowhere in a surprising way. For example we don't know what the tulpa is going to say until we finish hearing the sentence, also there's a "implicit" feeling that it's from the tulpa and not from us as well. Also sometimes i even hear the tulpa's mind voice coming from another "mental layer" or another place in my mind CLEARLY different from my thoughts and auditory visualizations come from. It can also come in auditory hallucinations which, at least on me so far are 100% involuntary and mostly only with closed eyes. By tetris effect i really meant that definition, check out on wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tetris_effect ). Obviously i am not talking about hallucinating tetrominos BUT since i started watching videos from the character my tulpa is based from, more intensively now in a daily basis (for now just 20m a day), i am finally feeling my tulpa more than just a copy of the character, it feels as being more "alive" and i never was able to got such effect with "normal" forcing using just visualization and narration, i am even starting to get alien answers more frequently with the ball counting test (and they are accurate because usually ONLY the alien answers have the correct nr of balls that i didn't conciously count). Now i understand why only at weekends i was able to feel my tulpa stronger, it was because at weekends i mostly force the tulpa using videos as "inspiration", and during the weekdays i mostly rely ONLY on narration and visualization (very weak). Regarding the context of this thread, what i mean is that "forcing" tulpas during a lot of time seems to act as a "tetris effect" and this could explain why persons get more involuntary/alien answers from the tulpas after forcing more time. This means that when people get the tetris effect by playing videogames or doing some kind of activity for long periods of time even if it's not actually forcing a tulpa, it's actually a VERY similar mental effect because keep in mind tulpas ARE thoughtforms as well just like the things we focus when doing such activities, so i am suspecting this IS indeed the same thing.