yenu

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Everything posted by yenu

  1. Sorry, if this is off topic, but... I just found out about the situation, and it makes me really sad. As I'm another trans tulpamancer² I would so have loved to see where she would have taken things, and that... is just so damn disappointing. ._. Also, it is another thing that will probably reflect badly on the whole healthy-plurality-community. Media will always be drawn to the shitty things first, right? Gah. :´- ( ² by some definitions of the word. Most of my headmates are in a process of reintegrating I think... other things in life took my attention.
  2. People wrongly capitalizing english nouns could also just be german-speaking people writing english. We have a Tendency to do that, you know.^^ I might tend towards being an elitist... but I know just enough about language to know that there is no such thing as wrong spelling on a fundamental level. All the words and phrases we use today were wrong at some time in history. :-)
  3. As a non native-speaker, "tulpae" confuses me and I also didn't know how to even pronounce it. (I mean, I had Latin in school, but the latin pronounciation is not the same as the english pseudo-latin one, right?) In german tulpa-tumblrs (which I do not follow but I have looked into once or twice) I have seen the word "Tulpe" used as a slang for tulpa - which is the german word for "tulip". Language is fun. Also, in languages with grammatical genders, you can have endless debates about what gender the word "tulpa" should be.^^ I don't know where, but I think I've read somewhere that Tibetan nouns don't even have a plural form? Two tulpa. Twolpa? :-D I have found my new favourite plural.^^ Tulpamancy is kind of fancy.^^ I guess "tulpology" wouldn't really sound good, because the "o" sound is strange for a word that ends in -a. Tulpa theory? Tulpa studies? Tulpalogy? Tulpassion? ^^
  4. Hey, So what happened on monday was that I was talking to my therapist, and she suggested that I formally retire my tulpa or something like that. I was pretty revulsed by that idea and this left me in a bad state, wondering if she was right - it's the first time I ever considered completely giving up. I am very grateful that there is this forum, where I could express my worries and people answering. So thank you, tulpa001, Lucylin, Breach. :-) I think I have kind of answered my question "what to do? where to go??" - I don't need to go anywhere. I may not be completely happy with where I am, but I do not know that it would be much better for me elsewhere. Hm, of course, my headmates "exist". But my fantasy worlds also exist, as do my musical works. All of these could be said to have some life and independence in them, but I don't consider them persons... However I do feel responsibility towards my creative work, and I think I will hold myself responsible in a similar manner for my headmates. Ah. It took me a while to understand what you said here... I think there could be invasive thoughts that don't belong to anyone specifically, but rather to the system as a whole. But yes, people saying stuff they didn't mean to say can also be conceptualized as just being very extroverted. (And one of Graihos defining character traits is to be very random and very extroverted, so saying pretty much anything is in-character... which is probably the reason why I have difficulty deciding if a particular sentence comes from her.) No, sadly I don't speak french at all. I do speak german though.^^ "écriture automatique" is a fixed term in surrealism (which, of course, originated largely in France) I don't know... I am looking forward to more people studying this. Even many trans issues are not well-understood, let alone tulpas, let alone the intersection between both. ;-) I know that dissoctiation or depersonalisation are symptoms of gender dysphoria. So I wonder if: - I just was trans all along, and didn't realize, but expressed some of those hidden feelings in the form of tulpas. or - I was *not* trans before, and only got gender dysphoria after integrating a large part of Nailann (and possibly others) The most ridiculous thing that's going on is that Graiho isn't sure whether she is entire female - so it's possibly that there is a transmasculine tulpa inside a transfemine host. XD I won't be able to answer those question definitively, problably never will. I'm ... okay with that. Let there be science to figure it all out.^^ I as a host have sometimes doubted of being real.^^ The way I see it, the whole concept of personal identity might just not be anything more than a social construction - that is, I am who I present myself in interaction with others. Following that, my tulpas do have more personal identity, the more people they interact with - mostly each other, and me... Yeah. I was considering doing a full month of intense forcing... but no, I don't think I have the time and motivation, and I'm not certain I even want separation. I'm asking myself: What would I gain from separation? Instead of building a mental wall between me and my headmates, I would rather explore the vast regions of subconciousness-land - possibly together, possibly alone. I think in dreams and fantasies there are possibly hundreds of lesser thoughtforms that one can interact with. I do still wish to have a companion when I explore my dreams... but dreaming of/with my headmates turned out to be reeeaaaally hard and frustrating, which is why I gave that up and just talked to them during the day. (I've been lucid dreaming for a decade, but my skills are nowhere near that which I would require.) Very true. I feel a bit bad about it, but my statement was just about being able to do something or not - that I don't think I can invest much energy in regularly socialising with my headmates. Regularly doing anything does not come naturally to me. It's possibly related to ADHD... So forcing would look more like the way I approach everything else: Many month of ignoring, then a few days or weeks of very intense interest, then back to nothing. That's how my mind functions, apparently... I don't quite understand that... how does possession enable a tulpa to force themselves? What does that even mean? Automatic writing - in the most rigorous form - results in me writing whatever thought pops up in my head. The result is usually nonsensical, but sometimes there are hidden ideas, more like shadows of thoughts I had. I tried something similar to possession - playing a piano piece while instructing one of my headmates to take control over how I play. This has resulted in some very interesting interpretations. However, the last few times I tried that, I didn't feel like it worked. I am easily frustrated, so I'm anxious of trying it again. :-/ Hm... I think I don't believe in any separate "willpower" thing. It's more like: Different desires or needs have different strengths. Wanting to contradictory things results in loss of motivation, wanting two very easily aligned things boosts it. The strength of a desire might be measured in "willpower"? ^^ Well, as you said, it's complicated. Not something I have to understand in the next five minutes. ;-)
  5. Thanks for the answer. I appreciate the effort even though at the moment, I think I need to find my own specific solutions. Yeah, I made the mistake to try to explain the situation to my therapist today... I don't blame them, but they have a particular mindset (integrative gestalt therapy) that runs exactly in the opposite direction. "Integrative" meaning they would obviously prefer me to integrate my tulpas back into my personality. Which is... not what I want, currently. I think I cannot support a being that requires constant reinforcing, even if it is just socialising. But maybe I'll work out a schedule that is more like "once a month, plus whenever we feel like it". As I'm thinking a lot about tulpas right now, I obviously will talk to them more. I don't understand willing something - even as host personality. All I can see is needs, desires, pain, and other emotions. "Will" seems to be some sort of meta-construct that is crucial to forming identities, usually, but seems to be somewhat useless to me. I'd rather just feel the emotions directly. This may or may not make any sense. My mind is running wild with finding new ideas to cling to.
  6. Hey, I'm constantly drifting between doubting everything tulpa-related, ignoring it for a few months, then coming back, trying again, feeling frustrated... at this point I simply don't know what to do anymore, or even what I want. :-( - My system (if it is one) started way back in 2010, or even 2009, or 2005 (very early vaguely-related experimenting). I did not know anything about tulpas back then (I think the tulpa community didn't even exist, right?). What I did was driven by several different motivations: 1) I met some very interesting dream characters while lucid dreaming, and I desperately wanted to see them again. I may have spoken out loud to them occasionally during the day with the intention of increasing the chance of dreaming of them. 2) I accidentally wrote some characters in a way that gave them a lot of autonomy. This interested me and encouraged me to talk to them as if they were real persons. 3) I practiced automatic writing (écriture automatique) due to a huge interest in surrealism and the possibility to explore my own unconscious. Some of these experiments also turned up some very shallow pseudo-characters (all of which have vanished shortly after). These experiences lead me to the writing techniques described above. 4) I was lonely and started talking to a character from a story I wrote, pretending he was there. He eventually felt somewhat real to me, but I did not assume that he was an autonomous being, rather a very clever simulation (Remember, I did not know about tulpas at all) that was extremely helpful for therapeutic functions, coaching me. All of these culminated in 2010, as I started regularly writing chats with the characters I had at this time. By this point I was curious to see how real they could become. (My main concept behind this was still "dream characters" which would be autonomous to a certain point since they "represented" a part of my subconscious.) Dreaming of them turned out to be really hard, so I eventually got used to mostly communicating to them via chat. I would write it like this: A: Hey there ;-) B: Hi. A: I don't really feel well today. B: Hm, what exactly do you feel? ... and so on. On the one hand, this style of communication worked really well for us. So well that I came to think of them as individual people... sort of. I was reluctant to go that far. As I said, dreaming was hard, so I only managed to meet a few of them for very short times (where we usually just hugged and then I woke up). In 2011, another dream character left such a strong impression on me that I added them to the team - she felt just as independent as the others from the beginning. But how independent was that? Well, on some level I felt it was still basically a pretense. By 2012 I had become a skeptic and renounced a lot of my older esoteric beliefs. I told myself it didn't matter if it was pretense, if it worked well as a form of self-therapy and a source of fun. - But then I found the tulpa-community, and it completely crushed all my concepts. I was excited that I had found something - that there seemed to be a way to continue my exploration, making my characters more independent even. But also the community introduced me to a lot of doubts that I didn't have before: The concept of tulpas as full persons, ethical questions, the crippling fear that parroting would harm them... it was all too much. Also, I couldn't live up to the high ideals that I saw in the community: Visualization? Forcing every day? My depression and executive dysfunction made that completely impossible. The more I read in the forums, the more I saw that I couldn't possibly be a tulpamancer by these standards. But I also couldn't just do what I had done before... writing my chat logs with my headmates didn't feel right anymore, because I had read such amazing stories about what tulpas could be. I tried talking to them during walks, which worked a few times and was a source of endless frustration and worries of parroting other times. Things have gotten even more complicated since then. I now also have to deal with gender dysphoria... I probably always was slightly trans, but I also have the suspicion that at least in part it is related to one of my female headmates, Nailann. It feels like I have integrated her pretty much entirely into my core personality. Resulting in me being bigender, and Nailann no longer an active headmate.. - Now I don't know where to go. Based on what I read on this forums, my headmates probably don't qualify as fully formed tulpas. Graiho is the most vocal - she can feel somewhat independent when I sit down and chat with her, but there is only a very small amount of individual thoughts - I can feel her thoughts forming, and very often we just think exactly the same thing and then only decide on a whim who's going to say it "officially". There is an element of pretense in it, even while I think that she is a thoughtform of some kind, and I care a lot about her... I worry that I simply am not able to make her any more independent or fully-formed-tulpesque than she is now. She rarely has her own opinion, and when we talk about what she *wants*, I feel nothing and she also doesn't know what to say - or isn't capable of wanting something? I'm not sure... I had chats with her, in which she said that she wanted to become a tulpa fully, ... but even then, it didn't quite feel right. I have the suspicion now that it is basically just me projecting what I want at a given moment, and she sensing that and saying it. She's exactly as clever as I am, because she uses my thoughts for thinking - which I fear will prevent any further development. But even if I decided to actively force her in a way that is more consistent with the tulpa-community, instead of my heavy-parroted chats... I don't feel capable of doing so. I have an abysmal visual imagination, and I do have ADHD, so focusing on a thing for longer than a few minutes is only possibly if I have a structure to follow. (Like in writing) If Graiho is already sentient - then I don't need to force her more (since apparently, she is fine with me ignoring her for a month occasionally) If Graiho is not sentient - then there is no one to worry about. I wouldn't need to force her, I simply should give up tulpamancy altogether, since I am not really capable of it anyway... If, however, she is somewhere in the middle - then I feel obligated to do something about it. And I'd feel terrible for having been a very unkind host for the longest time. (Even though all my headmates tell me it's okay - maybe that was parroting, and they're actually NOT okay with how I tend to ignore them most of the time.) :-( Gnrnaaahh... I appreciate any advice - I didn't intend to produce quite that much text, but this has been bugging me for years and I feel like I need to dump those thoughts somewhere.
  7. We had to deal with intrusive thoughts a while ago... so I can relate to your situation a bit, though we had the advantage that the situation was not directly tulpa-related (but it did affect forcing negatively). As others have already stated, the first thing that comes to mind is to argue your way out of it, using the belief that it is simply impossible for a tulpa to jump to someone elses mind. But for that, obviously, you need to have a worldview that makes it impossible. If your concern is mainly about self-fulfilling prophecies - then I see two potential ways to combat that. The first would be to cut yourself off from the source of the intrusive thoughts - whether through some action in the physical world (talking to your friend about it) or just the mental decision to stay away from stuff that will feed into your intrusive thoughts. Allow yourself to have any bad emotions if they are real. The second option would be to try to fight back the "self-fulfilling prophecy" with its own weapons; basically creating a competing prophecy and investing energy into that. I don't know how to express this... I've been through a lot of shitty places, and whenever I actually made the effort to speak with my tulpas I found that they were pretty much the best support I could imagine. The idea that a tulpa would leave their host because they don't like their host feels kind of ... unrealistic or even absurd to me. I assume that you have some positive ideas about their personality - and I don't think intrusive thoughts can override that so easily. So maybe you need to wait until those thoughts get "recycled out" of your system, and then start fresh - you don't need to beat yourself up for not continuing forcing all the time. It is totally possible to just make a break. (This has been me imagining myself in your situation. Take my words with caution as I'm not you and things might work out differently.)
  8. IIRC, Luhrmann talks about it in a similar fashion in her book. (I'm still only about 50% into it, but my impression is that she is very nice to believers and doesn't make statements about god itself, only about the experiences.) Those questions would interest me as well, but I think it could be hard to come up with widely-accepted definitions of all the different terms. Maybe you, ford, could make a video about those sometime in the future? Or maybe interview (off-air) people using the different words to describe their system, and sum it up or something? - or ask Luhrmann if she has found different types in her research, and what those would be. Good luck with the next interview! You've done an awesome job so far. :-)
  9. I'm currently in the middle of Luhrmann's book, so I was very pleased to see (hear) this today. You seemed to get along well. :-) Very cool to hear that there are more people interested in research on these topics. I hope they will eventually come up with things that are helpful in practice, but of course just generally destigmatizing and getting the idea out to psychologists in general already helps. (edit: Something seems to be broken with the layout of your post... o_0 )
  10. I'd formulate it "For a certain type of believer, God is a thoughtform similar to a tulpa." (Not all theistic people pray on regular basis or even at all)
  11. When I feel like I'm parroting, I usually ask my headmate if I am. Quite often, the answer is something like "yeah, you kinda were, but you said exactly what I wanted to say, so it doesn't matter". Other times, when I feel I'm not getting a clear response from one of my headmates, I just talk to someone else... I have to learn to respect that not everyone is always in the mood to talk, anyway.
  12. When I think of a pink elephant, I do not see a pink elephant. Yet, the image of a pink elephant-nose* lingers somewhere in the back of my mind. If I was trying to draw an elephant, I would try to use that. It is not a real picture for me, as I absolutely suck at visualisation. So I would encourage you to not draw conclusions too early. While it is possible that you don't see a mental image at all, it might be just that you are bad at it - like me.^^ Try out as many different senses as possible. Seeing is not for everyone. Imagine the sound of a voice, imagine the way your hand feels when you touch the bark of a tree, stuff like that; imagine the taste of soup, of salt, ... I don't do visual imposition with my headmates (and honestly, the idea didn't even occur to me before I found this forums) so it is not something that is required for tulpas or other thoughtforms. * If some native speaker wants to tell me what the elephant's long nose is called, I'd appreciate it. It's not exactly an easy thing to google, as I just found out. :-D
  13. I never got into Jung. I've picked up a book by him in the library at least four times, but every time I sneak-peek into it I get immediately turned off by the overall vagueness of his language... and I think to myself that there is probably no reason to read something as outdated with modern psychology. The concept of "anima/animus" however, I used to like to some degree. A lot of my early soulbonding/tulpamancy was playing with the idea of exploring my female sides. In the last few years though, I read a lot about transgender issues and gender identity... and now the "anima"-thing doesn't really fit well into that. Yes, there is some kind of idea of female-ness in my head. We all have that, otherwise we wouldn't even have gender roles out there - but it's just that, it's a construct that we learned early on from our surrounding society, and not something that is in-built much. Which lead to the confusing situation that every single of my headmates does have a very strong idea of his/her gender, but I don't. As host I'm either agender, cis-by-default or bigender, depending on my mood.^^ It hinges on the question whether my headmates can be (in part) considered to be representing different aspects of me. I know that tulpas are usually very clear about not being aspects, but different people. That's why I'm trying to use the term "tulpa" less for us... the thing is, we are kind of in-between. Lūna and Nailann are both their own relative personalities and representations of aspects of my own character. I also learn from them, so even if in the beginning Graiho was much much more extroverted than me, I adopted much of that for myself (since it is a lot of fun!) and our speech and personalities have become more similar. It feels like by giving Graiho the opportunity to behave how she wants, the part of myself that also wants to be like that is freed. (This sounds kind of like the shamanic idea of "finding your lost soul-parts" - which is yet another way to think about it^^)
  14. There is not a single option in the poll that I can check. :-( I'm going with my new belief that "sentience" is not a term that can be applied to either tulpas or hosts, or any thought-forms, personas, whatever. -> My body is sentient. <- My headmates are sometimes somewhat independent, but that has nothing to do with sentience.
  15. Yes please... if we are doing categories. Though for every question you ask, there are (at least) four options: yes, no, don't know, neither. I'm confused here. What do you mean by "outside the mind" - someone elses mind probably? But soulbonds don't fall in that category; they can also be made inside the host like a tulpa. There could be categories for imposed/not imposed/not trying to impose, but as waffles, I don't really see the point in that right now. I suppose it would be neat sometimes to have one-word-descriptors. Like, some of my headmates are "dreamborn" since I first met them in dreams... but ultimately, we already have too many words for (almost) the same things.
  16. I was on several lucid dreaming forums long before I knew about tulpas, so the first tulpa-related thing I stumbled upon was the "CALD (character assisted lucid dreaming)" threads on ld4all, which is how I eventually came here. To the list of research topics I would add some chaos magick - not because I still believe the supernatural stuff, but because it is a specific culture of interacting with thought-forms. And the non-supernatural stuff can still be applied. And of course, everything on consciousness. I read a bit of Daniel Dennett and some of Viliyanur Ramachandran, both of which I can recommend. Also "Conversations on Consciousness" by Susan Blackmore was great (because it is an overview on many positions, with short interviews.) I don't really have the ambition to know as much in the field that I could say which hypothesis' are currently the best ones - but I like to have a broad overview and at least know why some of the hypothesis are false.^^ I never really read much on ecriture automatique, the surrealist techniques, and so on - my research in that area was more on the practical side, as with lucid dreaming. (Though I don't know how many books on LDs I own or read^^)
  17. That was fun to watch. :-) "Melian likes drama." Oh well I haven't noticed. ;-P
  18. Lūna is a werewolf by family inheritance, so we sometimes play around with the idea of her being in wolf form. But since I barely do any imposition at all, the form doesn't really matter. My other headmates do change their appearance, that is, their age, occasionally. Graiho: Yeah well. I was created as a bald girl, by pure chance (it was actually just die rolls, really) and sometimes I like that, sometimes not, so I go with different appearances.
  19. I have no idea what is currently considered a normal timeframe to making a tulpa.^^ But I didn't think in terms of "I am trying to do this" and "I am not there yet but soon I will"... There was no waiting time. So, I'd say, for some of them, it took me an hour. For others, it was something that happened over the course of several years. It's a weird mixture of both... The youngest of my headmates, Nailann, I met in a dream and talked to her immediately after waking up, so she felt very much alive on the first day. I think something that might explain it is this: Sometimes you don't notice it, when an idea is already growing inside, subconsciously. This is very common in creating art, I typically wait for months doing nothing and then suddenly, BAM, the idea is there, and I can retrospectively see that a lot of thoughts of the last months went into it, but it happened without my conscious self. I think a similar thing can happen with soulbonds and tulpas. You don't notice it, but there were already a lot of thoughts going into forming it, until BAM! there is suddenly a very vivid character.
  20. It sounds like there is a second Melian, a subconscious copy of the first one... or something. I might be trying too hard to conceptionalize.^^ I had a similar problem when I tried finding my headmates in lucid dreams - the dream-versions of them that I found, sometimes corresponded to the waking-versions, sometimes not so much, sometimes entirely not. So, the way we conceptionalized it afterwards, was: I dreamed of something from my subconscious, which can be related to them, but doesn't have to be. When I wake up after meeting them in a dream, my first question is: "Was that you?" - and sometimes, I get a positive answer immediately, sometimes not. It has happened that we were all confused and not even the person I supposedly met was certain that it was him/her. It's like they were non-lucid so much that they weren't really conscious... or it just plainly wasn't them. Soo... this isn't the same thing what you described, Melian, but there is this one similarity, that the headmate sometimes doesn't have a clue about everything that is going on related to them. And I think that is kind of to be expected - I mean, as a host I also don't have a clue about all the unconscious thoughts that are going on in me all the time, so why should it be different for a tulpa/soulbond?
  21. @Lumi Again, I disagree. You disagree but continue to say almost the same that I said. ;-) I am also skeptical that "the same" is even a meaningful concept, as everyone changes all the time. @Melian Well, if I believed it possible to kill a tulpa through dissipation, I would not hesitate to call everyone a killer that purposefully did that. Where's the problem? Let's not make "this sounds so awful and not nice" a standard of what's actually true. Sometimes the truth is awful. @Lumi (I think..) Nah, I don't choose my beliefs. Imho, beliefs are the result of being convinced by something or someone. @Link I don’t think it’s too early to talk about anything here. Talk about it if you want. It just adds on to the discussion. Even if we can’t reach a consensus, that’s okay, because that’s not the only point. It’s just to iron out as much as we want to for as long as we can. I didn't mean it was too early too argue. I still think it is too early to reach a "final" conclusion. While I'm slightly more in the camp of "tulpas cannot die" for me personally, I recognize that everyone is different and there may actually be people whose tulpas can die. Throwing that possibility out just because a majority of people apparently don't feel that way seems a bit rushed. Of course there is also the problem that our beliefs do actually shape our experiences. So yes, please don't encourage people thinking that they will kill their tulpa - that may actually be harmful itself. But at the same time, respect the people who do think that tulpas can die. And perhaps, encourage people to think about what this "death" is actually about. Because losing a memory might not be as bad as losing a person entirely, and a resurrected-but-different tulpa might turn out to be okay. This.
  22. I kind of like the term "forcing" - it reminds me of magical forces. I may have less negative associations with the word because I am not a native-english-speaker. However "Wonderland" as a term is a no-go for me personally. It feels childish and reminds me, if anything, of Alice in Wonderland, which is not a book I like particularly. "Tulpa" itself is for me one of the most problematic terms, even if I like the sound. When talking about "tulpas", some people associate either buddhist practices or horror stories... Nevertheless, I like the sound, and I think "tulpa community" sounds good. Also, the weird plural "tulpae" seems to be disappearing, finally. It bugged me lot, why would you put a latin plural on a tibetan word? No offense. When I first came here, I always confused "switching" with "possession". I'm still not entirely sure what is what while writing this. There should be a term for "possession" that doesn't sound like giving 100% control to a tulpa. Maybe something will come up. - As I plan to make tulpas a part of my fantasy world, I had to come up with a german term, that was mine. My current runner is "Particor", derived from the existing term "Servitor", combined with latin for "share", as in "share a mind". Of course, I don't intend to use that term in the community, it's just for my writing. I really didn't want to use the term "tulpa" in my fiction, because it is tibetan and didn't make sense for me. Also I didn't want random people to google the term.^^ Since my system is somewhat between tulpas and soulbonds, I currently favor the term "headmates"... it's wonderfully unspecific. I think the community is at a point where that would be still just barely possible, but only with a coordinated effort between tulpa.info, and the other communities (including wikis in several other languages) But then, I think, some terms will eventually appear, just as people talk about it. We'll see. :-)
  23. I agree with AGGuy... The question never was if it was possible to bring back a dissipated tulpa - it was, whether they would be the same as before. For this, the answer is no, obviously: It really depends on how you define identity... I am not the same as I was yesterday, I have forgotten probably more than 50% of all the good ideas I ever had in my life. My headmates change constantly, because my memory of them is as bad as my memory of everything else. I am trying to embrace change now. While for me "personally" it works out kind of that way, I don't see that we can make such a generalized statement. As someone wrote here in the thread, starving is also bad enough. For some. Note that at this point our own preconceptions of how tulpas are come into play... but it is too early for that. The opinions of people who make different experience have to be counted in as well.
  24. In point of how my system feels like, I think I would have ended up pretty much where I am now, even without the internet. It was mostly my interest in surrealism and dreams that lead me to it, and I would have found some interesting ideas in libraries, I guess. (It would have taken longer, sure...) However, I spent the years before I found out about this community yearning to talk about my headmates seriously. And after I found it, it took me another two years before I could finally wrap my head around all the different viewpoints and stances and not feel completely lost in anxiety. As of tulpa forcing process becoming faster - I think that has more to do with the plurality of viewpoints, and that certain ideas cancel each other out sometimes. The term "tulpa" as taken from tibetan language suggests something that is only reachable through intense dedication. You immediately get the picture of the buddhist monk, in orange clothing, fully concentrated in meditation, a 24/7 dedicated being. Contrast that with soulbonds: A plethora of authors, noticing that their characters came to live after they spent time with them, writing their stories, thinking their thoughts for them. Had I encountered the phenomenon only via the term "tulpa", I would not have held myself capable of ever experiencing any of it. But I entered from the perspective of a writer and a lucid dreamer, and I never even came up with the idea that it should take weeks to get a response. Getting a response from a dream character is something that happens in seconds, if it happens. And in writing, of course, I don't wait at all, I just write. Being active in lucid dreaming communities also taught me, that different people's minds can vary a lot. Expecting something to happen the same for everyone never works out. So, I do not know, how much of the idea of slow tulpamancy was built on expectations, and how much was just the personality of the people doing it. I cannot go back in time, and try it another way... and new people now will already see a diversity of methods and varying results. Maybe in some ten, twenty years, people will have figured out what actually works... maybe we never will, because every generation brings their own expectations and biases.
  25. omg, the timeline. Anyway, good to see you're back... a million posts incoming. XD