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About Shabhira

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    Central Ohio
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  1. I'm happy for you Amy! The human brain is capable of amazing things.
  2. An update, since I suddenly dropped off the map. I caught a sinus infection, and stopped forcing all together except for rarely passive forcing for a few minutes. Surprisingly I will still faintly hear Tyrone in tulpish, but not very often. I am still getting over the infection. I had to take 3 days off of work, and now I am just barely making it through each day thanks to sinus meds. If I don't take it, or when it wears off, my sinuses start screaming at me. With all of this... well... it's kinda hard to focus on anything except for whatever I need to do next.
  3. Say hello to Shara for me :D
  4. Granted, but the partitions always end up taking up twice as much space for some strange reason after you move them. I wish I had blond hair.
  5. Granted, but it is ALREADY USED I wish I had the power to always know what is going to happen 5 seconds in the future
  6. Granted, but only for a limited time. By the time you check this thread again you have lost control of it. How sad :( As for your question, I honestly don't want that much responsibility. I wish that the teddy bear I sleep with every night came to life.
  7. Keeping it short, since I have a huge headache. Spent much of the day interacting with Tyrone a lot. Exchanged a lot of questions with other another host and his tulpa as well as another tulpa herself as an exercise for me to listen to Tyrone. It is fairly challenging because I am having trouble making out whether the thoughts that I am hearing are his or mine, especially considering how fast they sometimes come. I also learned that Tyrone is very definitely communicating with me in Tulpish. I don't think I fully understood what that meant until now. Okay, since I started writing this I have taken asprin and had orange juice. IT DOES HELP! I'm done anyway.
  8. Haha! That is so cool! I have to check out the hypnosis stuff. I just wish I was better at forming my dreamworld. I need to settle down and really work at it, even if it's just a room. I started with a garden and I think it was too complex for me right now, I can always go back and change things after all, so I am thinking I'm going to make a core 'safe room' that I can really get the details down with until I don't lose anything between sessions, like things going blurry. I dunno. Maybe you can help me with that! What kind of stories do you write? Also, I love that your tulpa is anthromorphic. If I had decided Tyrone's form on my own I probably (definitely) would have made him an anthromorphic squirrel. I'm glad I didn't though, better that he decides on his own without my influence imo :)
  9. Thank you for the reminder, my delicious friend. It's an important one I think. I do agree with you. I'd actually take it a step further. It isn't just me learning to receive the information either, but both of us learning and growing together. I'm learning to receive/hear/sense/feel him, and he is learning how to communicate with me. A joint effort. Also, a slight update, I spoke with my partner about tulpae again today, and she seems to be coming around a bit, although hesitantly. She is weirded out by the whole idea, and has some fears as well. I may talk about it more tomorrow in a proper update. Too tired now. P.S. I went to see Edge Of Tomorrow with my partner and father in theaters. Holy crap that movie is awesome, and it's so much fun to watch Tom Cruise die over and over xD Edit: I just showed my partner this progress report, and she wanted me to include that she just passed a certification exam to be a Pharmacy Technician. She is pretty excited about that :P
  10. Today was another very intense day. Things were pretty normal this morning, passive forcing, etc. I decided to call my tulpa 'bestie' for now so that I'd at least have SOMETHING to call him/her. I narrated verbally all through lunch. That was interesting actually, I noticed that I seemed to have a larger than normal interest in all the birds. It seemed to me like my tulpa really likes birds. Then for some reason I got the feeling that my tulpa wanted to have a bird-type-name like Dove, or Wren, or Pheonix. I didn't know. So... I asked! I wanted to be sure that this 'feeling' I had that my tulpa wanted to be named like that was real, annnnnd the response I got was a fairly solid 'No.' Oh well. During the last hour or so of my day at work I was reading some guides on bringing out the voice in your tulpa, when I got an idea! So on my way home in the car I went back and forth between explaining what a radio is and how it works to my tulpa, and having my tulpa focus on what the sound coming from the radio... well... sounds like. We did this all the way home, then after I got home I set up pink noise to play from my laptop headphones, arranged it so it only took a button-press to turn the pink noise on, then settled down to active force. I spent a few minutes meditating, then went to wonderland and worked at creating myself a little radio-room. I set my tulpa in another room to transmit to me, and in the receiving room I put a radio receiver with a few dials and such, a tv screen (a black Panasonic, interestingly) and a little monitor thingy that could attach to my chest. Then I moved my hand just enough to hit the button to turn on the pink noise, and in my wonderland I turned on the radio. Doing this really destabilized things though and I had to take a minute or so just to get things back together. I had to fight for a bit because the walls to my room kept shifting to transparent, revealing white pillars stretching off into infinity in all directions. Crazy. Anyway, I got the radio on and my wonderland settled again, and focused. I watched the tv and listened to the radio. It didn't go quite as planned, largely because I had an incredibly difficult time maintaining concentration. A much harder time than normally, oddly enough. And also oddly, I found vision being kinda engulfed by the tv, like suddenly all I could see was the static of the tv. Then some very interesting stuff happened. First, a name flashed, but I could only catch the first few letters. Ty...something. It felt like Tyrone or Tyrelle, but I couldn't tell. It flashed too fast. It was very clear though, like a definite imprint in the static. Then, I saw a flash of a man's face, which was immediately replaced with a woman's. The woman's face actually stayed for a few seconds, eventually fading away. Both of them had dark hair, a red bandanna, and olive colored skin. Whut. So I'm a little shocked right? Yeah. I try to get a little more out of this. I realize that I hadn't really heard anything, so I turn off the tv in the wonderland and focus on listening and feeling for feelings. I don't get much at all, and eventually stop. After I pull myself back to reality, moving was difficult, but I managed. I took a few minutes to clarify some stuff with my tulpa. The first thing I needed to know... is s/he a guy or a girl? I closed my eyes and focused and asked, and asked again. I insisted that s/he use his feelings and not headpressures. Eventually I get that he is a guy. He was trying to do what I wanted. I insisted that he do what he wants. I then pulled up lists of boy names that start with "Ty" and asked what his name is. Took a little bit, and it's slightly vague, but I am pretty sure his name is Tyrone. Whoa. I'm thrilled, and surprised. The last name I was expecting was Tyrone. (Ok, there are probably other names I would expect less, but seriously) I go on IRC, feeling very tired all of a sudden, and chat a bit. Someone asks me to describe Tyrone and I picture him in my mind for a second. I didn't catch what his eye color was before, so I wanted to see if I looked closely at what I could remember if I would see it. What happened instead shocked me. I saw, very clearly, brown eyes. Okay then! Tyrone has apparently gotten much better and sending me images. Or rather, he has gained that ability, since he couldn't do that before. So yeah, now I'm exhausted, and he is exhausted. I seem to be able to feel his presence and his opinions a lot better, and, well, yeah. I'm slightly overwhelmed right now. So an overview of my tulpa's current appearance: Male, Dark brown hair, short beard, brown eyes, olive skin Wearing a red bandanna Looks rather rogue-ish
  11. Hello Deliciously Violent Pastry! You seem to have made great progress. I hope that by the time I've been at this as long as you my tulpa will be interacting with me that much. I'm confident that we will, but still. It's really encouraging to see you just a few days ahead of me and already doing so well. Thank you! It does help. :)
  12. Woohoo! Don't be sorry! I mean jeez compared to that I wrote a damned book :P I wish my partner was more supportive myself. She seems reeaally freaked out by the idea. It's rather upsetting really :( I have done quite a lot of personality testing stuff, but it has been a long time since I have. I spent hours at one point over several days with a PsyD getting a battery of testing for allll sorts of interesting things. Found out I'm not ADD, and my IQ, and that I have all sorts of other fun issues! Thankfully I have meds for those now though. :P