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About Aarix

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    Walking down my Alley!

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    Rule of thumb for tulpa: Do it so much up to the point where it feels unnatural not to do it.

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  1. 08/31/2020 Year 8. Nothing eventful about it, before too long it would have been a full decade. I've basically have been forced to accept that things are how they are and will not change. Not through anything dramatic or through any sudden realization but just through being well past jaded. I occassionally get bursts to attempt when I have the resolve to do so and repeating the cycle of frustration. I still occassionally look through as many resources as I can. Pretty much anyone from long ago that had a sincere interest in Tulpas are pretty much gone. At least out of my life. I st
  2. Sorry I never got a chance to see these messages. Went through sleep studies before and nothing was found from them. I'll concede in my views here since I'm not as active as I used to me but I've lurked a fair amount and always felt it wasn't taken serious enough or it was mostly being used a way to fit into a community. But that could be the cynic in me since I know you can work hard in developing as well as have fun in forums. Appreciate the post. There isn't a specific problem. I just seem to have a myriad of different issues that I can't try and tackle anymore. Maybe it's learnin
  3. 07/21 We're now at year 7. I planned to wait a little later but it really doesn't matter. I've heard from a few sources this is where accidental thoughtforms were at their best. Around the 7th year mark without very much effort, just rolling with it. The foundation for the rest of my life has been worked on since I started. I've learned a lot more about myself and the general self reflection stuff. I've kind of just learn to enjoy the benefits of not having to deal with the traditional baggage one feels around people on a regular basis. Staying mindful and keeping my sights on the big pictu
  4. 9/2 A five year milestone has passed it seemed. I've spend well near all of it worrying, trying to get a good mental foundation on going about this. If I could go back to starting, I'm not sure there was too much that would have changed. Some of the underlining issues were lack of peace from my surrounding and chronic fatigue. Most of my experiences have been riddled with stress and anxiety. Actually only recently things have shown opportunities to get better given I am now in control of my environment that I never was before thanks to being able to move alone now. It's always been a game o
  5. 8/31 Happy 4th birthday. In retrospect an insignificant number. I wish I possessed more to say to warrant more than a yearly update. Hell even now I don't have as much to say. All of this time I've been craving the peace both mentally and environmentally to break away at all of my problems. Not too long ago I hit a 20 day streak that got interrupted by issues I'm struggling to mitigate. It's been an agonizing few years and the more it passes, the more I need to feel some hope and reassurce from her and the less I am capable of doing so. I've read as much material as I could find. Scour many
  6. 8/30 Well here we are, Tomorrow is Samantha's 3rd "Birthday". I suppose it warrants enough to post here. I had my own expectations, and hopes and desires when devoting so much to her. I figured it all came with time with enough belief and trust in them. So far none of it has shown. Three years, I've never stopped finding out ways to actually get past that wall to feel closer to her. To feel any sort of comfort from her presence. The only things that came from this for the most part is a lot of drama, bullshit and the more vivid realization that I am a complete idiot. I can't active force
  7. Hope everyone is doing well. It has come to my attention and has been even more apparent that I jumped at this idea foolishly. I should've given Samantha even more faith in her strength and abilities. I've been trying, both of us have for a very long time. It hasn't gotten easier and there has not been any changes that I can detect. It's been eating at me for a long time but regardless, introducing another life isn't the way to go about this problem. I've been so determined for anything that I rushed. I'll keep doing whatever I can.
  8. 12/16 Happy December and all that. A lot certainly has happened these last couple years, most of it full of things I wish never happened or things that could be changed. Never the less, progress is being made and thus being reported. In light of recent situations and circumstances that are best left not discussed. I believe it is in the best interest that I have a bit of assistance internally. Things recently have been FUBAR. Without turning this into a drama box, I'll cut to the chase, slowly but surely, I've been working around the idea of creating another tulpa. One a bit more, how shoul
  9. I suppose I'm rather late to hear this news, regardless, it caught me by surprise, given by all the progress you made back in 2012 and how I remember looking up to you and others to get my own shit together. In the end no body knows a lot of things about tulpas from how they work or exactly what is being done. All we have to go on is, if it works it works. It's easy to delude, we are taught to ignore any doubt and to force our minds on a plane of existence that allows for tulpas to be rational. Few forcibly discipline it accordingly and most happen to just passively go with the flow and just h
  10. Besides the IRC, I'm sure many just don't much incentive to lurk the forums and have moved on with their tulpas to bond more. Few have migrated to talking to friends they met here elsewhere such as Skype.
  11. Just out of curiosity. Regardless of the reason being they need time in the mindscape, you need the extra focus or whatever, what do you feel when your Tulpa isn't around to feel even if temporary? And if you never were away from them, try a short session without acknowledging them. Even if 6 to 72 hours if need be. See if you feel any emptiness or spiteful loneliness. If anything it'll make you more grateful they're around.
  12. 188, That numbers not very great.
  13. The more and more as time goes on the less and less results I'm witnessing. Its hard to correlate. Its possible no one is putting in any effort and its even more likely no one knows how exactly to put in effort. I'm sure if we did put a dozen imposed tulpas into discussion then there STILL might be controversies regarding abilities or beliefs. Right now everyone as a whole is at an impasse generally speaking and everything is still a work in progress
  14. 2/26 Tulpas and Tulpaforcing, it's rather tricky I've learned. Each and every individual mind holds many independent beliefs and perceptions, they all unify into your thinking consciousness. That's the challenge here, needing to adapt general information with your individual mindscape. You need to really find the root into the reason you want a tulpa, why you feel that reason will keep them around for years and years, why it's important to commit in every single light and every single trouble, It's imperative to keep them attached in many ways but separate in others. Tulpa and host need to
  15. The habit is certainty there, most of the associations have been made to connect my tulpa to my focus. There still are persistent motivational issues and I usually make sure I'm settled in various other aspects before I even think about sitting down and attempting to clear my hear before one though pops up as a reminder for something I need to cut forcing short on.
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