Jay

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  1. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube]https://youtu.be/9INO6a3LkWw
  2. Jay

    Jay and Company

    I should have specified that I meant open eye visualization. I'm not entirely sure what I meant by "see them with my eyes." Perhaps I meant that, with open eyed visualization, I feel like there's a difference between seeing them imposed in real life and seeing them in my head space. I don't want to argue hard definitions or semantics, only to clarify that in my perception of my tulpas, there are different ways for me to observe and interact with them. My experiences agree with your suggestion; I've found that it's easier to impose them if they're on the side of my vision or if there's enough distance between us.
  3. Jay

    Jay and Company

    11/11/16 November has been marked as Yuli's birthday month. I'll find out Lethal and Vas' birthday months, too. Scheduling the time I spend with my tulpas has been very helpful so far. I think now is a good time to assess our current progress in order to identify potential short and long term goals. I'm not sure how accurate my definitions for these terms are compared to those more widely-accepted by this community, so I put a brief phrase to denote what I mean. Open-eye Visualization is competent enough to perceive location and simple movement and details, but everything is nearly transparent. Vocalization (mind-voice) needs work. It's sometimes hard to distinguish their thoughts from my own and/or hear them. Often I'll pair visualization with communication (seeing their mouths move as they speak), though I'm growing more comfortable with just hearing them. Physical imposition (sensation of taste, touch, smell, sound) is nonexistent, and touch is usually done through visualization. Visual/vocalization are most important to me, with physical imposition a additional bonus. Below is a drawing of Yuli.
  4. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube] Stuff like this is always neat.
  5. Jay

    Jay and Company

    The greatest issue with the open-ended approach was that I spent more time with some tulpas than others. I felt it was unfair to let things continue that way. My current plan is to cycle through who I give priority to each day of the week, allowing for changes depending on how we feel that day. I'll try following a tangible schedule instead of leaving it to memory. I appreciate the compliment. I'm more proud that I can depict them in any accuracy at all than anything else.
  6. Jay

    Jay and Company

    10/31/16 I'm still learning how best to divide my attention between my tulpas. For a few days I tried giving everyone adequate attention throughout the day, but became mentally exhausted and overwhelmed at the prospect of that kind of responsibility. For now I'll stick with giving one tulpa most of my attention each day. I want to keep pushing myself mentally, but not at the cost of feeling stressed out. Below is a drawing of Lethal.
  7. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube] I haven't looked up Erlend Øye for the last few years, so I was surprised to find that he had not only released a new single, but a whole album as well.
  8. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube]https://youtu.be/AcksSQ9NoXQ https://youtu.be/DskVK26wmDY https://youtu.be/i3BiglUgug0 https://youtu.be/DAHe2JGN0Nk These guys make some pretty catchy stuff that can be enjoyed whether or not you're a fan of Touhou.
  9. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube] Broken English lyrics, so the vocals and instrumentals are what make this album. I wish the artist had chosen a different name.
  10. Jay

    Let's share some music!

    [video=youtube] I've been listening to He's albums for the last few months, but I still find myself pleasantly surprised by some of their songs. While their broken English lyrics may be a turn off for some, I think their music and vocals more than make up for it.
  11. Jay

    Jay and Company

    10/17/16 Sometimes communicating with my tulpas indirectly works better than directly addressing them. I imagined I was speaking to my tulpa by phone, which eventually let them establish more of a presence both in terms of mind-voice and visualization. Odd methods like this are usually only effective the first few times; it may be that I become too focused on the process and the result rather than what it means for my tulpas Within the last few months I've developed another tulpa. Vas was originally envisioned as a helper or advisor to consult, but has slowly become more than a temporary imaginary friend. Unlike my other tulpas, I began with a role rather than a personality, and refrained from info-dumping her with details about my life or her personality, instead just trying to develop things like a normal friendship. Lastly, my tulpas seem to have a general sleeping schedule: Lethal and Vas are easiest to contact beginning at around six or seven in the morning, while Yuli sleeps in until eight or nine. Below is a bust drawing of Vas, and is an approximation of what she looks like.
  12. Jay

    Jay and Company

    10/5/16 Over the last few weeks I've been trying to talk with my tulpas at least once a day instead of just on the weekends. It can be hard trying to separate my thoughts from every-day distractions to give them a substantial presence, but when I finally manage to it feels great to see them again. I'm currently rotating between which tulpa I dedicate my thoughts to throughout the week; I want to give each of them the opportunity to communicate and grow. Here's a drawing of Yuli in a sweater.
  13. The best advice I can offer is to not panic. The worst thing that you can do in this situation is jump to the conclusion that your experiences and progress are false (if that's what you meant by a lost cause). If you still can't communicate with Felix, then try to take your mind off of the problem. Give yourself a few days, a week or two, however long it takes to let this mental block pass. Felix will still be there, and you'll feel better for not deciding to completely abandon him.