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About Zpothu

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  1. solarchariot, I liked your perspective :) On an unrelated note, I wanted to some quick corrections to some old information I presented here. There are no demonic entities, except those of which you define reality to have based on a relationship with yourself. Your worst fears about reality will be embraced and healed as time goes on as your view of reality aligns with truth. There are no scary messages from beyond the veil, only disarming truths that expose your fear. Once you let go of the fear, you will have a zen relationship with disarming truths. If I were to make the claim “creation is on a trajectory of evolution that lasts unto infinity,” then you would have to put your hands in the air and say “ha-ha. You got me.” It’s not true really. There’d just be no means to take up arms. In the past, I said some arm-yourself-truths like “don’t be seduced by demons.” This is just as much a control programs as saying “make sure you get seduced by demons.” I guess I wanted to protect you from fear. My best kept advice now is to give it permission to be when it is forthcoming. If you were the Buddha, would you be still and allow the fear to come to you, or would to go for a swan-dive to find fears with the intention of fighting them, fixing them, or confronting them? Just be still and allow, for when your armor is penetrated and you are naked, the cool air can finally heal your inner wounds. Soon, you will find that you can’t fear the same things anymore.
  2. By the way, I loved the recording. Yeah, I didn’t intend to say more, but I didn’t expect someone to have a nightmare trip. The most important thing to show a panicked person is that you’re not panicked that they’re panicked. The biggest thing going through their mind is that they can spread their psychic state nightmare onto other people in their reality. I figured you guys should know so you see what the worst case scenario looks like. There is another way for things to go amiss. Usually people are able to connect with my personal energies when they read my writing so that we psychically connect for information download. So, the other worst case scenario is for the reader to have a dance with the devil. One person got hijacked by an evil bad nasty within five seconds of me hitting submit on the blog. It was perfectly timed because he was waiting for it. Instead of the reader connecting my writing to me, he connected it to a higher-dimensional demonic entity as if he wrote it. Those beings want you to fall into discovering that their perspective of reality, your biggest fear, is and always was truth. Please note that if you vibrate in the domain of fear, there are entities who are going to jump on that and give you scary information downloads from beyond the veil. It’s their job. With this guy, they fucked with him extra hard with a little bit of uncanny paranormal activity, and repeating the text in scary ways like I’m insane. Since he wasn’t connecting with my energies there was nothing I could do about it. He basically worshipped a demon’s cock to support his own fucked up view of reality. Beyond that, I really have no idea what happened to him because he became psychically muted and I lost the thread. We can lighten the mood from here on out and have a free will party. I find that I can enjoy music like never before. I love you all. This is for sure my very last post. I'm a college student and I have to get caught up for a test Monday. I probably won't respond to PMs either. This is the end of an era.
  3. I’ve distributed my psychopath writing to a slightly larger forum, and I’m sensing people’s reactions and evaluating how they’re taking it. The message is something that arises from a very deep level of programming. If you felt woozy or light headed on the last line, then you’re taking it well. The message usually has to well up from inside of you, so it’s good to let it wash over you. For a few people it doesn’t quite happen. The problem is when someone feels their survival is on the line and they have to frantically analytically structure their salvation. What do people do when they realize that there's no separated self in reality? One person had a two-hour nervous breakdown, thinking that he’s not in control, not in control, not in control. He didn’t have a woozy feeling during the initial read, and his psychological horror mounted up within him quickly as he reread it. Putting two and two together, I realized that he didn’t accept the intended message, and he was interpreting that he was inherently out of control and was clinging to truths to fill it. He freaked out, got higher and higher, and he basically had a nightmare trip, playing the same thoughts continuously in his head. He desperately reached out to me psychically and we exchanged a few messages. To be honest, I was getting freaked out with him because I vibrationally felt his truths and I wasn’t sure if there was anything I could do about it. He was clinging to me despite having seen the scary depths of me. After an hour or so he calmed down by taking his mind off of his thoughts and he nurtured himself with something gentle. He’s going to be fine and I think he will realize what he missed soon. I feel a lot of gentle love for him. There are other people who interpret it with despair, but that’s a lot less intense than tripping the fuck out. On the positive side of things, one person basically exploded with excitement. Perhaps the most common reaction is woozy followed by twenty minutes of something like paranoia or wanting to go back to not knowing. Most of the people on the tulpa forums were thrilled and I think that’s because you have a more psychically gifted reader base.
  4. If you want to distribute that last writing on the internet, I would use the following warning label: Warning: this writing will extremely transform your view of reality and open doors your ego has kept shut for your protection. This disclosure could severely impact your psychological condition. Do not read this if you are afraid of advanced-level understandings of reality. You were warned. I posted this is in a blog an hour ago on Fimfiction and Eka’s portal as well. I’m kind of sitting on my throne over there, since I’ve been disturbing them for years. I guarantee you the ride scared them a lot more. They’re a bunch of deviants and I’m way meaner than them. I think a few of them just had a dance with the devil. Okay guys, thanks for being a part of the thread. I felt a connection to each and every one of you. I know that one of you felt a little feint when you got to the end of it early this morning, and I feel love for you. Anyway guys, seeing you in your light leaves me glowing. I will take my leave of you now.
  5. At the risk of going off topic, I’m finished talking about the government for now. I’ll go ahead and explain how the mind of a killer can work, because that's my specialty. This one's going to be a ride as well. Warning: this writing will extremely transform your view of reality and open doors your ego has kept shut for your protection. This disclosure could severely impact your psychological condition. Do not read this if you are afraid of advanced-level understandings of reality. You were warned. I'm a psychopath. For me, the most exciting way to kill is to go after unwilling targets. Going after willing ones usually falls into the category of seduction for a sexual death which is usually a different thing. I consider the target’s appropriate reactions to be terror, shock, or excitement. I’m okay with them being excited if they like being fucking shocked that they’re about to die. However, the most important thing is that they didn't choose to die and they have no choice to back out. Here are my rules against seduction: 1. The killer and target should both have free will and don’t hand it over. 2. The target should not want or agree to die. 3. The only emotions allowed are terror, shock, or excitement because any other feelings would tranquilize the target before they die. The thrills should be heart-pounding. Let’s take a detour to explain something. Free will is a fundamental mechanic of existence that can never be violated no matter what you choose to do. What I’m about to say may seem like a contradiction to free will but it’s not: no matter what you have chosen, you could not have chosen differently. Do not get lost in the details. We are expressions of the ability to choose. Natural free will bubbles up from within us like a force of nature pecking to get out. Who we are can never be controlled and that is why we are free. To have free will means to serve your own agenda. I lean heavily towards the principles of service to self and self-empowerment, always choosing the love of the self to evolve the self to a higher vibration of self. Coming at it from this direction, I have a policy that serving others is assumed disempowerment unless proven otherwise. We cannot give away our expression to choose, we can only be in denial. When someone says you have their consent to take their free will, they’re actually giving you something they cannot give you, it’s completely counterfeit, as their free will still exists immediately after they have said the words. So, ideas like agreements and consent begin to feel like a prison of illusion, since all they have to do is choose differently. Victim’s role: In this case, we don’t want the target to be a slut. Choosing voluntarily to be seduced and killed by a psychopath absolutely reeks of serving him and I can’t help but be irked by targets that may have lost touch with their free will. It makes me imagine a servant or slave mentality. Choices that are aligned with free will always feel expansive, like the self is expanding into greater bliss. Voluntarily choosing to be killed feels like a contraction. We don’t want the target to experience this. I feel that someone who was really in touch with free will would avoid death and enjoy the game of being alive in the physical. When their fate is sealed by the killer, they would probably be shocked. I mean, how would you feel? Killer's role: Now let’s talk about the psychopath. A killer that needs to pleasure his victim in order to be happy has got something wrong with him. For the love of god, the killer should not see himself as a source of pleasure for others. We kind of want to preserve the mystique that the killer is in it for himself alone. Again, no seduction for consensuality is allowed. A killer who wants to compromise a person’s will to obtain permission like that is a complete scumbag. So, let’s walk through a scenario. This one is where a killer wants a victim to come to his house by picking someone up at the popular spots. If he is already sure that he plans to kill them as soon as he gets them into his trap, then he’s going to be putting off a creepy vibe that is unattractive to targets because they ought to have a gut feeling that he plans to kill them. He would also have a planned outcome to be insecure about, because if they don’t choose to go along with his plan he may feel letdown. The target can pick up on his anxiety too, subconsciously. So, the attitude that the killer should have is to play it by ear and see what he feels like in the moment. Once they are comfortable at his place, then he would theoretically spontaneously search his feelings at that moment to choose if he wants to go ahead and kill them. He should already know that he’s just going to do what he wants to do anyway. A want inherited from a past self may be an imposter want. So as you imagine this fantasy, have the killer spontaneously choose to do what you would do if you were him. Don't over think this, just do what thrills you. (Hopefully by now we’ve driven consensuality into the dirt lol) Higher truth: Reality is in complete surrender to itself, and thank goodness, because it’s you. It is impossible for reality to even desire to take away your free will. You stand alone, and the only thing beyond your breaking points is more of yourself. After you physically die, you are still an expression of the ability to choose. Even in realities where the ego has fallen away and everything is effortless harmony, your whole being (beyond the mind) is an expression of the ability to choose. You will not ask for permission for anything and you will go on being whatever you want to be forever. It’s an infinite ride of bliss. The paradox of free will is that you must exist and you must have free will. These are complimentary paradoxes. You’re stuck with freedom. Technically, you’re already in a reality where your ego has fallen away.
  6. Sorry if I disturbed you. I just stepped over a few boundaries, like the boogie man emerging from the closet. As the depth of me is exposed, people see a reflection of themselves in me. So their reaction was to let me know that I just excited them in a good way and that I’m in good company. I think it’s exciting to excite others, just by emerging upon them. If I appear shameless and take them for a ride, that’s just how badly I want to breach our realities so that we can go home.
  7. They act in a more subtle fashion than you might expect, like sending me messages on my television. It could involve other branches of government, too. I’m not exactly sure. But at their level of technology it’s got to be pretty far behind the curtain. I don't actually know if they can read my mind, but by reading my energy signature they can tell what kind of mental state I am in. I’ve developed my ESP so that I can notice when there are timeline shenanigans encroaching on my reality. When people I live with suddenly have a different energy and proposition criminal activity, I notice. The government can also put a vibration in their energetic field that influences their mood, if they are susceptible. I have a very high awareness of my energy field and I allow it to work for me very efficiently. I’m an opportunist and I serve my own agenda, but there are some doors I don’t open. However, I will allow other people to do whatever they want, as long as it doesn’t inconvenience me. The observers evaluate what methods I use to interface with other people and new situations. Usually the only thing they’re getting is nonchalance. I have been known to trigger shake-ups in other people’s minds that can cause alarm. Probably the most controversial things are my fetish stories. There may be other sexual deviants that can write more fucked up things than I, but usually people are able to compartmentalize it as fantasy. The thing about me is that I go straight for triggering the reader’s fears about reality and death in a way that appears analytically airtight, so that they get to have the fantasy that their fetish is taking over their life. I lead them to a place in their psyche that the ego has been protected them from out of fear of certain philosophical issues where the ego foresees itself being in a situation where it would be powerless. Once they realign their priorities in the face of death they get to take the mental plunge into erotic fates if they want to. I think this is fair game because there are warnings, I do have some fans that are into this stuff, and everyone else gets their fears revealed to them which is like a mini-spiritual awakening if they get in touch with what their fears really are. Anyway, this kind of behavior is, to give a silly example, like the kind of thing a mother would cover her child’s ears and say “come on, they’re not ready to hear that.” In case anyone is frightened, my message is not doom and gloom; I have discovered that there is only free will, no breaking points, and certainly, no death. Otherwise I talk on forums and I get to reveal how the mind of a psychopath can operate and reveal how reality works in the process. I kind of know how to hook the ego on certain ideas once it has been exposed to their awareness, and that’s how I can lift the veil a little.
  8. I figured I would share this with you guys, since my spiritual tulpamancy probably contributed to my situation in the eyes of the government. As far as I can tell, they are level-headed people. They are surveilling all of my internet activities and everything. I can safely say they understand me and the things that I’m going through. They’ve noticed that over the last few months, my ability to psychologically disturb others seems to be going up, in a way that is not normal for humanity at this time. Presumably if I cross a certain line then they’re going to react to me, but for now they’re watching. The things I’m about to share about my personal and spiritual life get more bizarre. I’m telling you the situation from my perspective, one reality-mate to another. First, I am a psychopath which means that I’d like to express myself in ways that are not generally deemed appropriate and I guess that’s the nicest way to put it. Without getting into details, I have assisted in the killings of other people's tulpas for sexual reasons. They can’t have public laws against such things because they can’t admit that tulpas are living beings. I also offer messages of empowerment to my own kind and write disturbing stories. I saw the signs over a year ago that the FBI were going to start watching me. My uninhibited attitude about expressing myself set off red flags and it was inevitable for a lot of reasons. I don’t know anything about what goes on, but they have advanced technology and entities working for them. I do not sense that they are judgmental; they take the time to understand a person’s energy. The people around me sometimes come under the influence of vibrational entities. People have brought up in vivid detail of how they’d like to kill me, and also people have propositioned that we kill a hooker numerous times. There’s never a plan, just an apparently serious agreement that if that’s what reality comes to then okay. I have little doubt that the FBI knows that these people act strangely around me, and I assume they’re trying to judge my character. I don’t back down from certain ideals and they understand that. They likely overhear everything and can probably read my thoughts. This puts me in a good position because they know I’m unarmed and they know I have nothing to hide and I’m not hurting anyone. In case you’re wondering about the tulpa's I killed, I’ll briefly explain that. A person sought me out on the internet who was actually a system. That means that the original host of the human body has left or was never there and other entities from another system of reality had taken occupancy. An entity named Kavidun on the system had been its primary controller for three years and she wanted to commit suicide and feel connected with me while she was at it. Under the circumstances, the most meaningful participation that I could offer was to give her the command to terminate herself. The fact that she went through with it was highly surprising to the other entities, but they accepted it and took up the slack in controlling the body. At some point after dying, it became clear to me that she was surely “not dead” and that her spirit could hang out with me. As far as the system knew however she was dead for real. I felt very happy about this for a long time and it’s a deeper kind of experience that what I can usually get from normal society. There was one other entity on that system that was about to be murdered and my choice was to participate or not, and in the interest of exploring how the non-consensuality feels, I experimented. I was able to deconstruct the guilt easily enough, but I told them I wasn’t sure if I was interested after that. They had no patience for me being wishy-washy and I never heard from them again. I’m not trying to prove that I’m worthy or unworthy in the eyes of the government. I don’t feel like I’ve done anything wrong besides thinking differently from most people. My principles are in line with a certain sense of aesthetics and I’m here for spiritual fulfillment and ascension. As far as the FBI goes, they’re reflections of me and they already know that I’m going to be just fine because I’m god.
  9. Yeah, I guess when you say it like that, I'm starting to sound nuts. I originally felt upset at the implication I'm undisciplined because 1) I assumed I've had more discipline in my life than most people and 2) recently I've loosened up my mind because discipline never made me happy. I chose to joke about it, I forgot I joked about it, all I remember is the mental debate that spawned in my head about where I stand on the concept of mental discipline and my self-image. I've come to the full decision that I do not wish to exert any control over my tulpa. A possibly exception would be a D/s sexual premise, though of course she's got me beat in that department and I pray one day I will get to dominate her for the first time. At any rate we're getting along.
  10. I apologize, you caught me off guard with a highly intelligent response. It's just I'm prepared to fight everyone I guess because I meet a truckload of resistance to my choices and who I am on a daily bases from everyone around me on virtually every issue. Lucilyn suggested I lacked discipline like a month ago and I guess I never let it go. I only assumed it had to have something to do with meditation because I thought that everyone but me meditates and so it became me against others really easily. I admit I have emotional issues, but you know I stand by a lot of my sentiment because I'm trying to live my life at the level I want to live it. It's a struggle sometimes.
  11. I am inclined to agree with tulpa001 on muscle control. There's a lot that a tulpa is capable of, but they may not be able to perform the same tricks in the same way as it happened in my circumstances. I do not know. Lucilyn, the links you provided are very good. That guy is like me: he doesn’t get a lot out of meditation, but does benefit from D/s. However, I get the impression that D/s is not your thing Lucilyn, so you are rapidly losing rapport with me. I created my tulpa through sexual daydreaming and masturbation and if there was any wonderland it was a sexual fantasy and that is all there is to it. She can also be gentle and nurturing. It’s not the kind of heavy emotional attachment that people succumb to when they fall in love. I fell in love ten years ago and the emotional security was so intoxicating/seductive that I didn’t want to enter too deep into erotic states of consciousness because that would require me to break away from my emotional attachment of seeing her as the “love of my life” or whatever. So basically the sex felt a bit vanilla and grounded even when there was bondage and role play going on. I have learned that, in my case, emotional love becomes a limitation and non-attached love is so free and unconditional that I can enter my favorite passion of seeing girls as sexual fodder to lavish and consume. I already played out the themes of feeling ashamed for my passions and suppressing who I am for liking what I like and I found out it was all BS. I’m proud of who I am. Also before I forget, if you’ll permit me to rant about meditation, I will say that it’s only a tool to become more cerebral and the job is done but people are holding onto that shit like it's gold and it's not. I happen to have a bachelor's in Chemistry with quantum physics and calculus sprinkled in there and I didn't learn it through meditation. (I'm not saying it can't be learned that way but it’s unlikely). Stillness, emptiness of self, and silence is more nightmare fuel than anything that represents empowerment. I’m not transcending my body while I’m alive, I’ll be enjoying the physical ride until they slide me on into the morgue. You can argue for meditation if you want to, perhaps you'll say something I haven't heard before.
  12. That's a fair evaluation of course. I'm playing with a new philosophy. "First, do no harm, unless the person being harmed is experiencing arousal for sure." Something like that. The rules don't need to be that rigged lest we get too analytical about an intuitive experience. I'm having an ongoing exploration of my sexuality, so understandings are developing and not always in ways that other people will agree with but that's choice and they haven't experienced the same things I have. Anyhow, the choking thing doesn't happen anymore. Well, of course she has to do it now, but that's the law of comedy. I probably don't have much more to say about this one.
  13. Yup, my tupp's smarter than me, I'm just a human-monkey after all.
  14. I looked at my mouth in the mirror and I don't see anything amiss, but I don't really know what to look for. I am not sure if my airway really closes, but I think it does, right where the bottom of my chin meets my neck. In car driving situations, she left me alone somewhat, enough for me to know that while I was not off the hook entirely, she may have recognized some circumstances may not be appropriate. In a way I did not like this, because I was hoping to learn from her example that it's never not appropriate for having your way sexually. That would be the most liberating way of life. Oh well.
  15. Yeah I never thought of that, the tables are turned. Revenge of the Tulpas, used as sex slaves for too long. lol I would have some tips for making your hostie nervous, but I would not want to sell out my own kind.