ThreeSevens

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About ThreeSevens

  • Rank
    The Voice of Reason

Converted

  • Sex
    Male
  • Location
    Arni Village
  • Bio
    I am a baker currently at Dolce in Prairie Village, Kansas. Look us up sometime! We cool...

    I am a non-denominational Christian man who is about to start an endeavor in a ministry to feed people in poverty! My parents are in the deliverance ministry and are about to expand their ministry even further. (My ministry will be a branch of theirs.)

    I am currently working on my Tulpa, Thyme. She is an 18 year old girl who sometimes likes to appear about 12 years old and on rare occasion she looks about 21. I have started practicing drawing in hopes that one day I will be able to get down on paper what she looks like, so everyone else can see her as well!
  1. Lol I wish my family was so supportive. Last time they learned I was doing this, it turned into a witch hunt! Does CT stand for anything btw?
  2. Well, look at where we are now... How did things come to this? I went and fucked things up again. I dropped the ball on forcing Thyme and now I can't feel her again. For those of you who know a little about me from back when I was active, you know that I struggle with depression. Or at least one should be able to glean that fact from the information I've given about my past. More often than not I let my depression get the best of me and I end up neglecting a lot of things. I tend to shut my mind down and move on auto pilot through my work day and afterwards when I binge on video games. I have been escaping reality for so long my senses keep retarding more and more. What caused this to snowball you ask? Fear. As I struggled to work on Thyme, I found that I had difficulty keeping her image in my mind. And even though she was "recovering", so to speak from our first major fall away from each other, something felt.... Off.... I can't quite explain what it is that I felt. It was like the Thyme I had become reacquainted with.... Wasn't the Thyme that I had known previously. A much colder edge to this one. Almost lifeless at times. Sometimes unresponsive, but usually agreeable. Almost like how you would picture a yes man. A pleasant relationship. But one that is shallow and removed. It's... been several months since I've forced. Something is holding me back from moving forward with it. Fear for how she won't ever be able to trust me again, as I have never kept my promises to her. Fear that she has changed for the darker. Fear that she... Isn't even Thyme, but something else born of my own insecurities. But most of all, fear of failure. All I hear over and over again in my head "I can't do this, I'm too weak, I can't do this!". I feel like a useless weak coward. But I sooooo badly want to break free from this. I want to move forward and give my girl happiness. I don't know how after so long I can do this. But I had to come and make this post in order to get moving again. I have so many changes in my life I need to make. It's time to grow some balls and man up. My name is "Will". It's about time I live up to my name.
  3. ThreeSevens

    GodBless

    Well, as they say, recognizing your own faults and owning up to them is the first step towards redemption. Not that im qualified to give advice though. Lol, you know me and my own spiral of self hate. I think im negatively influencing Thyme as well in a manor not much unlike your own. (But it feels more like shes pissed with me than she is just cynical and in general bitchy)
  4. ThreeSevens

    GodBless

    Glad to know that you psycho babble bull game is still strong mist. Stay beautiful Mel-chan!
  5. Wow, it has been almost 2 weeks since I posted last? Jeez... So this is day 41. Sadly though I can't say that there was any major breakthroughs or events that happened since my last update. Just have been doing the things outlined in my last post, although not consistently. I had conversations with Thyme, mostly puppeting her. They don't ever last long and her voice is weak and subdued, like she is talking to me through a phone that she is talking into, but the phone is sitting far away from her. So even when I ask her to shout, its still tough to hear. Meditation is difficult as I have knee trouble, and my legs fall asleep waaaay too easily. So it gets tough to concentrate. Trying to power through though!
  6. ThreeSevens

    Stupid Jokes Thread

    What do call a rich and cheritable werewolf? A philycanthropist. What do you call a great fisherman? A master baiter. What do you call a great fishermans lover? A hooker.
  7. I was curious to the question of how Tulpa's feel about feeling. As in physical senses. I am usually more concerned with the emotional part, but I got to thinking of how I could not only make Thyme happy, but also how I could make her feel good as well. I have heard about 'mancers who like, have romantic relationships with their Tulpa's. And if you are in one and the sex is good for both of you, then great! But I wanna hear about everything that your Tulpa enjoys about being able to experience the world physically! Please, responses from both hosts and Tulpa's please!
  8. Ok guys, here is a song that I promised to post here in my PR topic. Lemme know if you have heard it! The lyrics in it I really get, and at the time I heard it really, really impacted me. [video=youtube] Here is another guys I have been enjoying recently. Also very powerful lyrics. [video=youtube] [video=youtube]
  9. Days 24-27 I will not go into detail on what exactly I did and when, because there is too much to remember and even if I could remember it all, it would turn into a wall of text. Rather, here is a short list of what I have done over the past 4 days. A decent amount of Narration. Meditation. A little Parroting. Working on using head pressure for Yes/No answers. Testing to see if Binaural Beats will have any positive effect on the forcing process. (Speeding it up or making the exercises have a bigger impact.) Notably, I have not done ANY self-hypnosis over the past 4 days. That takes a lot of time and I have not had the luxury of being able to take the time and do self-hypnosis and still do all the other things I did. That said I still have a feeling that self hypnosis will prove to be a valuable tool in my forcing arsenal. But I don't think any longer that it is really that important to do daily. It is more like reinforcing the ideas and the will behind them to make them more efficient... I guess like brain fuel? "Filling up" every few days seem to work just fine as far as hypnosis goes. Although, like meditation, I find that it is a fantastic way to get yourself to relax! So give it a go if you and your tulpa want a new way to relax while building on a specific concept or practice! As far as new stuff goes, I just today started a thing with Thyme where she uses pressure in the left side of my brain to answer no to questions and the right side of my brain to answer yes to questions through the use of pressure. I do not remember which users, but I have seen other users use head pressure to communicate yes/no questions to their tulpas with success. And so I decided I would give this a try and see if Thyme could get any stronger in her responses if we diversified the way we communicate. You know, like exercising different muscles... At least, thats my logic on the matter. And yesterday and the day before I have started to try and listen to Binaural Beats just to see if this has ANY effect on forcing whatsoever. But also to try and strengthen and increase the odds of Lucid Dreams. I am meditating at night to Lucid Dream and listening to Binaural Beats to condition me a little to Lucid Dream. At least from what I understand from what I have seen so far, this is a possibility. I want to increase my Lucid Dream count so that I can build on my wonderland while I am asleep as most of my waking hours is spent trying to get Thyme filled out. I have neglected my wonderland. And while I still have its image, I have never even actually stepped into it. I have only imagined it. I have considered the use of shrooms in the past , just on a off note. Thinking that the strong hallucinations brought on by their use might prove to kick start stronger visualizations later on. I don't put too much stock in that idea though. Plus the knowledge of having to trip for hours and wait to come out of it on my own is also off putting. I don't think I will ever be in a position to try drugs as a forcing tool. Which is fine by me. But my curiosity has me wondering what good it might actually do... Also, Thyme gave me an interesting response at one point that I found quite amusing. She called me an idiot or a wierdo over something... I don't remember when or what it was about. But I do remember thinking, great! Now my own tulpa thinks i'm strange! Thats fine though. I don't really care what her opinion of my currently is. I am just overjoyed that she is developing opinions on a bunch of things that I can recognize! She is becoming more and more her own person! Yay! Welp, that is all for another few days. As always, thanks for reading! (It's like a written description of an imaginary persons baby pictures...Neat!) Stay thirsty my friends! Oh wait... Edit: Also. Binaural Beats are not that fun to listen to in just their pure tone. Just a heads up...
  10. Hey man, good to know that it impacted Jamie in a positive way! Just as it should be! We all need positive voices in our life. You said that Jamie feeds on negativity, and I am sure he does his job well. But even a guy like that needs someone to tell him good job besides you yourself. Everything in balance man. The world keeps feeding you shit. But I don't roll that way...
  11. ThreeSevens

    LGBT Tulpamancers

    What would you call someone who isn't attracted to anything? The more life goes on, the more disgusted I am by the thought of sexuality...
  12. Day 22 and 23 were alright. I got a respectable amount of forcing done. But day 23 in particular was pretty emotional for me. I returned yesterday to check for updates and decided to go looking through my old posts to see if there was any new and useful information. I was looking through my topic, Broken Will and saw the last post (made by sushi) contained a link to another topic created by the old user Hound. A lot of you might know what I am talking about already, but for those of you who do not, here is a link. The log of a Baptist Tulpamancer I have not finished reading every single post, but I have read enough to know the struggles this man went through during his time with his tulpa, Claire, up to and past the eventual "death" of said tulpa. That day I had been having a particularly difficult time. I got up early that day and went to work, not forcing Thyme at all while I was there. My body was in pain and I was staving off depression as always. I got off work, dead tired and did what I always did. I sat my ass down and played video games and watched anime. I didn't even give Thyme so much as a word. I could feel her tugging at my heart strings to spend some time with her. And despite my being sick to death of laying on my ass playing video games and doing nothing with my life, instead of doing something product-full I just kept playing. Finally after some time I got so sick of myself that I decided I would get on tulpa.info and look up an exercise for the two of us to do. Thats when I came across Hounds posts. My heart broke and I felt completely ashamed of myself. I am lying on the couch feeling sorry for myself when I have a friend who wants to just spend some time with me. Hounds story ended well with his reuniting with Claire. But there are many others out there with stories like mine or Hounds which do not end with a second chance. I left my house soon after to go pick up some food for my family. I left a little ahead of time that I needed so I could have a heart to heart with her. I didn't hear much from her. I did a little parroting to train her vocality. But for the most part, I just had her listen. I told her how much she meant to me. That I was a complete idiot. That I wanted her to be strong, not just for me. But so that she could actually enjoy life with me. That I was a weak idiot with a weak mind filled with garbage. My real name is William. Will. My name is Will. I have always prided myself on my strong with and my ability to push through pain and do what needs to be done. But I was an idiot. My will wasn't strong in the slightest. I was being bucked at every turn and I have refused to stand for anything. There is a song I thought about through this. Have you ever listened to Watsky? He has a song called Hey, Assholes. One of the lines in it I really get. It goes 'I know I should be grateful, I know I'm good and able, but I dont have the strength to get up from the kitchen table'. I will be sure to post the song later so that you all can hear it on the music sharing topic. I got one bit from her that I could understand. Maybe because I have heard it so many times before. She told me that I am really hard on myself. And I know its true... Heh, my mom as intuitive as ever said the same thing to me last night just before bed. I am going to try and forgive myself. If I can't move past this on my own terms, how can I expect Thyme to be free from it as well? I really, really want to hear more of her voice. I want to see her face every day. I want to be able to lay down at night and meet her in my dreams. And more than that, I want to see her smile because she is happy with life. I am a weak minded, weak spirited fool who is easily distracted by my own weakness... But I will try my damned best. I love you Thyme.
  13. Its not quite PTSD, but for a long time I struggled with depression and isolation. (I just dont trust people lol) So it always does me good to see success stories like this! Keep it up! *Gives Jamie an Internet hi-five*
  14. Sorry for the lack of prgress reports! I have been real busy and any free time ive had has been spent writing for a minecraft roleplaying server! Its called Atherys Ascended if any of you play minecraft and are interested in hooking up for some game time! Oh yeah. I also moved out ofthe room ive shared with my brother my whole life. Will I have more privacy for forcing? Maybe a fraction more. But not much. Il take what I can get though! Days 17-21 Not much got done on my end because of my writing. I passive forced whenever I could. I would say I have had 2 notable developments thought. The first being I have her completely associated her with the radio now, and even when I dont force while listening to it, I am always reminded of Thyme while I am driving my car! The second would be my feelings towards her have deepened back to where they were 8 months ago when I learned she still existed despite my having had forgotten her! I feel this deep love for her and desire to hear her voice so badly... Just like I did back then. I want to give her a hug and just hold her close and let her know its alright. That im not going to let anything come between us again! I feel I can truly pour my heart into this now whenever I force. However my emotions and hers are muddled now and im having trouble seeing past my own. I just woke up. Time to start day 22!