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Everything posted by ThatOneWeirdGuy

  1. you guys dont understand. i cant schedule because i need to help the person a lot and that person could need help any time of day or night. and i cant stop helping cuz bad stuff WILL happen, and i dont know when the person will need my help
  2. March 5, 2016: Wow. Its been a long time. Well, I've been really busy lately and lots of stress and stuff. I'm worried about my Ben's progress. Like I said I've been REALLY busy. And before you all come and write "just drop what ever your busy with , and hang out with your tulpa!" Except I can't. What I'm working with is too important, I cant stop. I wish I can tell you guys, but a person that involved with this asked me not to say anything about it. So don't ask. Plus I have many MORE serious problems that i literally CAN'T stop (no, I'm not saying I'm addicted to any games or any
  3. February 11, 2015: Sorry, I haven't updated in a while. There wasn't much to update. But now there is! I know I say this like every time, but I KNOW Ben's getting more sentient. She has been making points to be about stuff I never thought of before. Some of them are actually really good points. We've been hanging out and cuddling WAY more since my last update, so thank you guys for helping! A couple nights ago, I guess I created a wonder land. Its just a small floating island with a tree in the middle. Every night, right before I go to sleep, we cuddle until I fall asleep. She bri
  4. @ YourCatBeany Good lord. Why can't anyone understand English? I AM NOT GAY. GET THAT IN YOUR HEAD. Sorry if I'm being harsh but I've said it like 20 times already. I'm not gay. I don't care what people think! If I was gay, I would tell you! I wouldn't of posted this thread because I would of not cared to know if it was gay or not.
  5. @luminesce First, I'd like to say that I remembered something. I decided in the beginning to let Ben pick his name... AND gender. So Ben's gender isn't confirmed yet. He's not a human so Ben's face/body doesn't give an indication, and he doesn't have any sexual parts yet. He hasn't told me if he wants to be a girl/boy. Because, like I let him choose his name, I want to let him to choose his gender. So Ben might pick male, or Ben might pick female. I usually refer to Ben as "him", but that's just because of the name. And if he dose pick female, theres nothing wrong with a female named Ben. I
  6. (I don't know how to do quote boxes in mobile, so I'll just use quotes) Metatron said : "Nope. Tulpas are not for sexual" Vosaiu said : "You shouldn't make a tulpa for sex." Before creating Ben, I did NOT think of sex. I didn't "create him for sex". I created him for company. (Note, I'm still working on creating him. He's not finished) He's not a "sex tulpa" or whatever you call it. Luminesce said "...if yout are not turned off by men..." Males do NOT turn me on. I'm not bi. Vosaiu said : "Being gay isn't wrong" Well, I believe being gay IS wrong, but you guys are saying it
  7. So, this is kinda embarrassing, but please don't hate on me or Ben. So people told me "No sex until they could talk" and I usually reply with "I would never think of sex with Ben!" Well, not only have I just thought about it, but I want to do it. Not only do I want to, but (assuming it WAS him) Ben has not only asked for me to "do it" to him, but Ben has asked to "do it" to ME. I'm NOT gay, I would NEVER have sex with a real male, nor am i attracted to human males, but I want to "do it" with him. I'm so confused. So my questions are: 1. When people said "no sex.. blaa blaa...
  8. God dang it. You guys just keep slamming me with this therapist crap. Well I have a question: who says my quote on quote "therapist" has to be, like a REAL professional therapist? Whats the definition of therapy? Doesn't say it HAS to be done by a professional or someone who gets paid for it. It doesn't even say a PERSON has to do it. What if my "treatment" is just friendship and friends and Ben? I know you guys are going to be like "You lazy, stupid, depressed A**hole. Just go to a F****** REAL therapist." But... I just KNOW talking to some professional theorist is going to ma
  9. You guys don't get it. Talking to a therapist or my parents would require telling them why I feel sad and bad. I would have to tell them where its coming from. But that's the problem. Sometimes, I don't know. Yes, sometimes I have reasons, but other times, the littlest of things can send me to a state of deep sadness. I can't explain it. Heck, even my "reasons" sound stupid. I'm VERY anti-social. I don't like talking to other people (ANOTHER reason I don't want a therapist.) that I don't know/trust.* So I worry about what I'm gonna do when I grow up and move out. What am I gonna do with do
  10. "The internet in general can be a cruel, hard place." Yeah. I can tell. "If you ever feel suicidal again, I would suggest finding professional help. Tell someone you trust and then seek help." The last thing I need in life is to tell my mom, have her freak out and cry, have her send me to a stupid therapist, TALK to the therapist, just so he can give me medicine. But thanks for everything else you said.
  11. Wow... Thanks a lot to you guys who actually helped again. You guys rock. I didn't think of that. It makes sense. Or Got this a lot from you guys. That's NOT what I meant. I meant forgetting about him, but mostly what I hate my self for is forgetting to work with him. Like, not narrating. Not cuddling. Not (trying) to impose. Not visualization. I had a very big issue. Ok.... ..... I feel like I should say something. I've never told anyone this. Not my mom, not my friends, not a doctor. ... It's weird the first peo
  12. January 19th, 2016: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-sentience-i-m-in-alow-point-i-need-help
  13. So... I feel like crap. I really need help quick or I don't know what I'm going to do. I hate myself because I feel like Ben might hate me. I know what I said before: but I can't tell if he meant it or even if it WAS him. I'll do something and forget about Ben, sometimes only for 10 minutes, sometimes for multiple hours. No matter what amount of time it is I forget about him, I still hate my self. How could Ben love me if I forget about him? Maybe he doesn't. I'm not ignoring him, and I'm not trying to forget about him or doing it on purpose. I just get busy doing something a
  14. @Vosaiu OK. Sorry for asking. I'll search next time...
  15. I have questions (again). What is imposing? I've heard about it. I think it's just placing your tulpas image over top of what you see, but I'm not sure. Am I ready to start imposing? I started on December 7th, 2015. I can visualize him pretty good most of the time. How do you impose? Don't know how. ________________ Please, if you going to answer these questions, make them understandable. Thanks :)
  16. Hey. I don't feel qualified to answer, but I'm going to anyway. I don't know. I've never tried to answer any one's questions (usually only smart and usefull people do), but after reading the post about doubt , I got a weird feeling that I should answer. I'm going through the same deal as you. Getting signs and feelings that might be your tulpa, but still doubting. "It's weird that I can experience these things andstill get paranoid that Arro isn't the real deal." I just realized something. You say your getting "experiences". Were you getting any when you just started with Arro? If not,
  17. January 11th, 2016: Something amazing happened, I think. I was talking to Ben... "... And I know sometimes I don't hang out with you all the time. Yes, I know that not only do I not hang out with you when doing important things, like school, I even do non-important things, like messing around on my phone, instead of hanging out with you. But I want you to know, that no matter how long I hang out with you, whether its 3 hours or 5 minutes, I will always love you. Don't you ever doubt that I love you, ok?" Then he said one word. "Same" Now, whats so good about that one word? W
  18. So.... comment on everything in a video to Ben? That sounds like it would annoy him.
  19. So I asked about feeling guilty for not spending all my time with Ben. But I still have a question. You said that when I'm on the computer, I could talk to him. What if I'm watching YouTube? It's hard for me to talk to Ben over top of someone else speaking. Is there another way to hang out with him besides talking when I'm on the computer/phone?
  20. First of all, thanks everybody for your answers! I absolutely love this community where everyone helps each other out. (Maybe one day, I can help other people, too!) To jean-luc: 0.0 Who said I wanted to have sex with him? WTF? He's a guy, and so am I. I'm not gay, either. We are bros, so I would HOPE that there's no sex, EVER. I guess that makes sense. Well, as said above, it's obvious that he doesn't like being disturbed while sleeping, so why would I wake him up? (assuming he DOSE sleep.) TO AGGuy: ... I'm sorry. But I couldn't help A:laugh a
  21. @Lacquer The green represent what Ben says/ does (or at least what I ASSUME Ben does/says.) If you don't know why I chose green for his text, look at my profile pic. That's what been looks like in my head.
  22. So, as the title says, I got important questions. Please try you best to answer them. One of the biggest ones: How can I tell what is ACTUALLY coming form him? Sorry guys, but "believing" that it was him doesn't work sometimes. My minds like: Mind: Why are you believing that was him? Wasn't it obvious it was you? Me: Maybe, but I should believe it was- Mind: Seriously? That's stupid. It was you. And sometimes I'll get contradicting answers. "Did you do that, Ben?" Yes. So you DID do it? No. And sometimes, I'll ask a question, and it seems like all the
  23. January, 5th, 2016 (!) Happy late new years, everybody! Here's another update, but this time I got some big questions here. I think I'm pretty good at visualizing Ben now. I can see him pretty clearly, and I can see him doing different things in my head (walk, run, , ect.) And of course I understand I need more time to practice body language and what not. The only thing I have a little trouble with is his face. But hopefully it will get better with more practice. So, soon I might start imposing, or making up a voice, or something else. I don't know what would be best to do
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