Jump to content

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'Forcing'.

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • Tulpa.Info Forums
    • Forum Announcements
    • Community Feedback
    • Guide UpVote Draft System Discussion
    • Home Site
    • Chat
    • Tulpa.info wiki
  • Tulpas
    • New Users
    • Tulpa Questions & Answers
    • General Discussion
    • Research
  • Guides
    • Community Guides
    • Tips, Tricks, & Resources
    • Just Do It
    • Articles
    • Drafts
  • Metaphysics and Parapsychology
    • Metaphysics and Parapsychology
  • Community
    • Progress Reports
    • Tulpa Art
    • Lounge
    • Forum Games
  • Archive

Calendars

  • Community Calendar

Find results in...

Find results that contain...


Date Created

  • Start

    End


Last Updated

  • Start

    End


Filter by number of...

Joined

  • Start

    End


Group


About Me


Gender


Location


Bio


Discord

  1. I am a M2F Transgender woman who is going through gender affirming medical care, I read recently about tulpas. My question is Can a tulpa theoretically be used to promote and complete Ones feminization?
  2. I will at some point in the near future try to force a tulpa, this will document that, for now it's just some stuff, I am very anxious about not being maximally informed before I do something so this might get indefinitely postponed I have read about "imposition" and "visualizing" and I have done these things before with no practice because evidently I am a tulpamancy prodigy and will be spoken of for years to come, or I have what people sometimes call an active imagination, in recent times this has followed the trend of my mind turning into TV static (this may be from that diet induced ADHD I have read about on this forum, I have a notoriously poor diet but I do not change, in both diet and body shape) so I can still visualize and impose (the latter I have been working on more because I am touch-starved) somewhat well it can just be a little fuzzy at times and the channel changes on its own intermittently, but I can still do it well. Imposition is definitely the weaker of the two but that's probably because I haven't been doing it for most of my life and if (when!) I finally decide to mance a tulpa it may help to have a second mind on the job. Finally onto the actual list of traits I want in my tulpa, to be expanded of course, in a later post. Wise, I already kinda knew I wanted this but it was solidified when TurboSimmie commented on it I don't know how to phrase this without it sounding a little strange but I would like the tulpa body that is fashioned to be at least somewhat pleasant to look at, I am horrid at most things relating to faces so I hope that the tulpa can fill that gap for me I am really bad at personality trait stuff, very unfortunate, I can probably get it straight in my head after a couple pondering sessions, so I'd like them to be good at the stuff that I'm bad at I know I was told not to do this but a little insanity goes a long way to complement an already sufficient personality, and it will make them more interesting to talk to, which cannot hurt (I can think of one or two ways that it can actually) better memory than me, this isn't asking for much, I assure you I'll get more stuff down later, but for now I need to sleep, assuming I didn't forget something in which case I will add an addendum to this post lest it keep me awake all night
  3. I have read a lot of advice on how to tulpamance but so far nothing really has happened I read "talk into the void until it talks back" I have been doing this for a while before I even knew that tulpas were a thing and nothing has spoken back so this advice seems moot (for me at least), and I have known about, and have been trying to force, tulpas for about a month now. since the prior method has not been working it seems as though I will have to imagine responses for the intended tulpa, which I am quite bad at. So much so that even when I do dream of people I know fairly well they don't speak much and when they do it's typically nothing they haven't said before. Even after that I'm not even totally sure who I ought to imagine A personal assistant? what they ought to say should be fairly straightforward, but incredibly bland and what I hear is called a servitor, which is boring A former president? (I.E. JFK or Teddy Roosevelt) things that they have said are fairly well documented and their way of speaking is fairly predictable by most standards (it has been said my donald trump impression is legendary, though I wouldn't want him in my head 24/7 regardless of my opinion of him, his voice would be too much) An idealized partner? I would love to have my idealized wife near me at all times though I have read that trying to tulpamance a parter can go varying degrees of wrong, and it could worsen my chances should I actually find a partner in life A mirror of myself? I know what I ought to say at all times to all things being myself and all, I have some interesting ideas for how this could go, like if how switching works how I think it works I could take a break for a short while and let alternate me have a go at my life, this doesn't sound too horrible though I can think of some ways it could go wrong A straight up insane person? There is a fair amount of predicability in not following a set speech pattern if that makes sense, I can just accept whatever my mind imagines as a valid response from them, and I have always needed help writing insane people and having an insane person in my head would certainly help with that, though there are a lot of cons associated with that and I hear that tulpa-cide does not go over well My dear old dad? I have known him my whole life and the things he says are very predictable by themselves. However, and don't get me wrong, I love my dad, having my dad in my head 24/7 would be too much dad for my taste, and I don't want to accidentally gaslight my real dad into thinking he said something that cognitive dad did A senate? this one seems more experimental to me, of which in general I have no objections but mancying many tulpas as one might go wrong and I think that having bureaucracy added to my every interaction would get quite boring, or exciting, I do love me some kafka A bridge crew? this would be related to the senate but ships! which is more interesting and less bureaucracy, meant to work on the fly! Lots of options! alot of which are kind of not great but everything has cons, which is why I come to you people so that I may receive some aid
  4. I've been trying to come up with names for my Tulpa. Anyone have any suggestions?
  5. warning; this post briefly mentions abuse of tulpa and uses the word trafficking once, please skip if you are not comfortable. lotus’ forcing thread ↴ ⭐️ hello, my name is lotus, i am a mystery age… somewhere in the usa… coding student, mexican amercian… yadda yadda yadda… thats not what anyone is here to see… and this thread is mostly for my own tracking, i know myself already lol… ive tried to make tulpae in the past, but i truly believe i was not in a healthy enough mindset to do so. finally, after over seven years of working with a trauma specialist, i feel stable enough to pick up this practice… despite having been involved beforehand, my knowledge is incredibly outdated. while old does not necessarily mean “bad”, older methods tend to not work with me. having been severely traumatized i am unable to force for even minutes without accidentally triggering a flashback… but that’s what the therapy was for… we’ll see. im still honestly averse to active forcing, mainly because of my adhd… but it just doesn’t feel like what’s right for me. im rambling, but i guess that’s ok. the issue is i still have a lot of old ideas of how tulpamancy works, having been involved with the wrong side of the community when i first learned about it; such as tulpa becoming extremely hostile when based of characters (which i know now is completely untrue. i have heard it can be harmful, but most seem divided. from the tulpa’s that are based off existing characters i’ve personally met, their hosts give them the characteristics of a character, but not necessarily the same background and allowing wiggle room for their own personality… i think that’s good… but i don’t know, im new.) along with hosts using their tulpa for undesirable reasons. im going to read through the science forum and a few guides, to help me reconstruct my view on tulpa… i honestly avoided it for quite few years when i read someone manipulating their tulpa as a slave, and as a victim of trafficking, i had to leave to leave the community for quite some time… i am incredibly glad that this is a rare case however, learning that other people besides myself understand that tulpa are independent and sentient, and by proxy, have free will. but enough on that, I think it’s time to introduce the girl i am planning on forcing. (art is not mine, i am still searching for art credit.) this is zelda; you can probably guess who she is inspired by, but with a twist. she’s curious, eager to learn, and has a deep love for other beings. (i have a lot of cats…) I do not want to go to much into detail as to why i chose this form, (which, she of course can change anytime she desires.) because it involves a quite personal story, one that i have spent years recovering from. i have also attached quite a few images throughout this thread, these being not aesthetic choices, but actual images of our wonder/innerworld… at least… what i could put together thanks to pinterest… here are some more — our main room ^ our library— my bedroom— zelda’s bedroom— and much more… I understand that this seems like a big world, because it is. i love imagining myself in wide, open spaces, such as these— with plenty of wild and forests to explore… it’s very comforting. i ended up putting much more effort into this than i originally thought i was going to… but i truly want to do this right. high effort posts are fun, anyway. i haven’t even begun to force her, but tonight, i will start by visualizing her form and imagining a beam of light going inside her, representing her gaining sentience (does that sound weird at all?) i’ll introduce myself, explain what a tulpa is… and do the smallest bit of personality forcing. then i’ll sleep, it’s [^^^^] pm and i have work… oops… needless to say, i may need to come up with my own methods of forcing, i think reading to her may be my best bet, i love to read. that’s all. bye, for now.
  6. TL;DR - I'm curious about the methods y'all use to share sights, sounds, and other sensations with the rest of your system. I started thinking about this today at work. It started to rain while I was doing my rounds. Athelas loves the rain so I stopped and took a moment to enjoy it with him. Specifically, I thought to him, "hey, feel this with me," and visualized him standing beside me while I focused on the sensation of the drops on my skin. He commented on how refreshing it felt. I ended up drenched, which was annoying and uncomfortable, but he was enjoying himself so much I couldn't stop smiling. So in our case, we're able to share sensory information when we consciously decide to, and it takes some effort and focus on my part. I'll ask Tea to taste some food with me, listen to a song with me, etc, and when I visualize him I can picture his reactions. I assume since we share a brain, he can perceive everything I do, he's just not necessarily "tuned in" all of the time. This is pretty different from when we first started out. I viewed Athelas as more confined to my head/the wonderland. I actually gave him a mental copy of my laptop so I could send him visuals and audio. Over time we gradually stopped using it and started sharing senses as I described. Does anyone else do this? Do you have your own method of sharing senses? I'd love to hear some different perspectives 😁 (Let me know if this should be posted elsewhere. I saw a few older threads that touched on this topic, but they didn't appear to go much into specific methods for sensory sharing.)
  7. NOTE: I am currently doing research on tulpae, I do not have any prior knowledge/experience on the topic except a brief search of “how to make friends” gone off rails a couple years ago late at night, I do not have any tulpae! Today I was bored and I remembered something about tulpa, so I began searching and looking up everything I could and wondered if tulpa’s could disappear on their own or forcefully, they can, I also found out what “possession” is and how a host or a tulpa can kind of just hang out in the wonderland or world you have made, I know tulpa’s can disappear, but can hosts if a tulpa is possessing them for a long time? Potentially making the tulpa the new host?
  8. The first step in creating a tulpa is selecting the tulpa dough; you can prepare the dough yourself or buy it at the store. You're going to want to kneed that dough until it's nice and springy! Next up you want to add the sauce to your tulpa; again this can be store-bought or homemade. After that it's time to add cheese; preferably you want to shred the cheese yourself but bagged cheese will work fine, it just won't melt as well. Once all that is done, you want to get your oven as hot as you can and stick your tulpa in! Depending on the thickness of your tulpa it may take a little longer or shorter for them to be done, so you want to check on them constantly! Finally, once the crust of your tulpa is a nice crispy brown, it's time to take it out of the oven! Let your tulpa cool for a few minutes and then they should be ready to enjoy!
  9. JUST DO IT Just talk to your tulpa Also don't make a sans tulpa, or Error will kill you
  10. Don't really know where to start with this question; it's a lot... I originally started getting into tulpae back in 2013, working with Aiden, and broadening into quite a few (what I would call) full Tulpae, and a few flickers of personalities that showed promise, warmth, and life. I began losing focus around 2015 (when I went to uni) and my group really fell by the wayside; I wouldn't be narrating like I used to, I wasn't able to meditate and force, I didn't continue doing storytelling to keep that connection strong (roleplaying with them through text with others/friends was a big driving force into their development). Suffice to say, by the time I graduated in 2019, the connections I had to my inner world (wonderlands and tulpae) were, more or less, gone. I've tried a few times to get back into it since I graduated as I've noticed that I feel somewhat alone or empty. When I try to narrate or comment on something, it really does just feel like I'm talking to myself and myself alone; That there's no-one there listening like there used to be. Is there something "special" I should focus on to rebuild these lost connections, or is it simply a matter of sitting down and trying to reenter a world that I can't really feel or 'see' that well anymore?
  11. Hi! im working with Evan more, but I’m having a hard time with active forcing. I was wondering if anyone has ways they get around this? I read that active forcing is rlly important and I want to make sure I put in as much effort as I possibly can!! :0
  12. hi :) my names Gregory, and I’m making a Tulpa ! :D this is to just track my progress, and such. im scared I’m doing things wrong,, I haven’t been getting responses from Evan lately. I just talk to him about my life honestly, I forgot the name for it in English but it starts with n? I’m native Spanish speaking, but I talk to Evan in English most of the time. I can’t talk to him often, I’m very busy almost always and have little to no free time. Whenever I can talk to him, I do, but I’m scared it’s just not affective, and that it’s been all for nothing. I’ve gotten one response from him,, so I guess I’m not failing completely.. - JUE ENE 2022
  13. First I'm sorry if this was already asked, I'm not always the smartest person ever. But anyways, I really want to active force with my tulpa but I just can't focus. Like, for me active forcing is really boring and I always space out and start doing something else. So I was wondering if anybody has any techniques for active forcing that are more like games? And I have seen some people posting their methods that are more like games but my tulpa normally isn't independent enough for those. But my tulpa can kinda speak (we are really focusing on vocality atm), they have formed some of their own opinions but for the most part haven't voiced any other opinions besides the fact that they hate girl in red, and that's all I can think of. I hope this is clear enough because this is my first post besides my introduction- ;-;
  14. You've most likely been there - you have woken up from a nightmare in distress, felt powerless being hunted down by some monsters. Or an intrusive thought has harmed your tulpa during forcing and you could not prevent it. Here we'll explore not only how to fix such mishaps but also how to exploit them to strenghten both your and your tulpa's forcing abilities, dream control and self-esteem. The concept itself is really simple. Whenever something bad happens in your imagination, be it in a dream or during forcing, do not dwell on it, especially do not worry about it. Do not feed it attention. Instead immediately replay the scene with your tulpa and change it to a positive outcome. You have protected your tulpa from an intrusive thought, no harm was done, they are perfectly fine. Your tulpa has easily beaten the monster which chased you in your dream and saved you. Be creative, any unpleasant situation happening in your imagination can be reverted and resolved. Adding a bit of humor may also not be the worst idea. You can even take this another step further. Woke up from a nice dream and feel bad your tulpas were not in it? Immediately try to replay the dream with them. The hypnopompic twilight state after waking up at least for us generally allows for more control than the swirling nonsense in the hypnagogic phase right before falling asleep. But also this state is worth inserting your tulpas and trying to exploit the extremely vivid visuals at least a little bit. There's no guarantee this will make your tulpas appear in dreams more often or help you to get better control over nightmares or intrusive thoughts but it's one of your best bets. The brain is generally lazy. It picks up whatever is convenienty there and tries to fabricate something out of the available chunks of memories. The more your tulpas are present in your mind before you fall asleep and the more both you and them are used to 'fix' unpleaant situations the greater the chance it may work out. At least it is definitely worth a try and also a fun activity to do with your tulpas. An afterword of caution Manipulating memories is a powerful techique and should strictly be limited to dreams and intrusive thoughts. DO NOT try to overwrite actual memories you have experienced, no matter how bad, create fake memories and treat them as real or replace the memories of other persons with your tulpas! If anything this should be done under the guidance of a professional to heal trauma but do yourself a favor and leave reality alone. Btw, this s not a guide, don't have the time to write up something detailed like that atm. But maybe someone else *coughlumicough* will. Let's brainstorm ideas here.
  15. So i started development of a tulpa about 2.5 days ago and she's been progressing very rapidly. The first day I spent forcing I came up with a placeholder form and name to help visualize ( I called her Tulp before she chose her own ) and embedded that form with some basic traits i wanted her to be built around and started narateing and parroting her responses. a while later she began to answer me with yes and no. she told me later she knew I would think I was still parroting if she just answered normally so instead since she already knew what i was going to say she interrupted me while i was relaying the thought to her. The next day I tried talking to her more and she started to diversify her vocabulary a bit with words like sure, uh-huh, nope, or nah. Later that day I asked her how she was feeling and she responded with happy. Whenever I ask questions that require more than one word to answer though I feel like i'm definitely parroting because the responses are exactly what I thought she'd say and they don't sound or feel like her. Later that day we talked about what kinda form she wanted and she decided she's 6'2", has black medium length hair, fair skin, a wide mouth and a perky nose. I also asked her what her favorite primary color is and she said yellow. We'll keep working hard and i'll post more updates as they come! UPDATE i forgot to mention that i created a mindspace for us that consists of my room and her room ( witch she decorated all b herself! ) and outside is a street and on the other side of that is a park. the street cuts off on both sides and the entire rest of the area is covered in grass as far as the eye can see. Tulip spends a lot of time in the park and also likes to draw things from my memories sometimes.
  16. MADD here stands for maladaptive daydreaming, madd is highly vivid and immersive daydreams that are typically used as a coping mechanism. I want to ask if anyone has any information or experience with using madd for tulpamancy. I was looking around on the forums and I was unable to find anything directly addressing it. As I daydream on a daily basis I would like to utilize my madd for both strengthening my bond with my current tulpa as well as to possibly create a new tulpa. So I also wanted to ask if anyone had any experience with that sort of thing. I am also concerned that with using madd I may end up puppeting my tulpa, like I would with the daydream's npcs.
  17. Earlier this week was having a lot of head pressure due to extended periods of visualizing, so as the pressures became annoying and persistent enough, I thought I should address it. I've noticed before that my head pressures are related to the way I was flexing my tongue muscles really hard and pressing it against my palate inadvertently. I have tried many times visualizing without doing this and, it works momentarily but whenever I stop paying attention to my tongue, there it goes again pressing my palate really hard once I start to concentrate into the visualization. I only notice that I'm doing that after I already start to feel the head pressures. By that time it's too late and it's already bothering me. So after two days of attempting to visualize with my tongue relaxed without success I thought that I should probably google that. So there I go googling the terms "tongue" and "meditation" and I came across this: https://www.easyayurveda.com/2020/01/31/khechari-mudra/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khecarī_mudrā Very weird, right? That's what I thought too. Basically, they stick the tongue up into the nasal cavity above the palate and use that to aid the process of meditation. So of course I went down this rabbit hole and found out that some people seem know how to do this naturally. This girl is an example of someone that has this ability naturally: https://youtu.be/ijpBUfOTBT0 Also other people report having head pressures identical to what we see in tulpamancy in this practice, here's an example of someone describing their head pressures in the context of Kriya meditation: https://www.reddit.com/r/kriyayoga/comments/mgpk73/tension_in_the_head_during_dhyana/ Described as "tension in the head that is somewhere between no pain and the pain you experience during a headache." This seems to me like it's the same kind of head pressure we experience in tulpamancy. At least to me. Also I forgot to mention that, they say THIS GIVES YOU IMMORTALITY. Which, of course, is bullshit otherwise there would be 1000 year old yogis walking around. Then I thought it would be a good idea to ask around here because, well to be honest, the people that practice this don't know how to explain it without anecdotes and dogmatic stories. Which is fine for spiritual people but I want to find what part is real and what part isn't. Or a deconstruction to find the line where the anecdotes end and the actual benefits of this practice begin. Or if there are any benefits at all. Here is a small list of claims about this technique: (which I have absolute no idea if it's true or not) -Helps you overcome hunger and makes it so that you go extended periods of time without food. -Gives you access to DMT that is stored in your pineal gland. By licking it directly. (yeah gross, the girl in the video seemed to get very high from doing it, she even says she's high afterwards) -The practitioner doesn't suffer from decay, disease and death. (this part I think it's flat out not true) -Gives you immunity to snake poison. (This one I think it's sorta possible, because some snake poison triggers your immune response and the response of the body is what kills the person not the poison itself, so technically by controlling your immune response you would therefore not die from the poison) So my questions are: 1-Does anybody else experience their tongue forcing up the palate unintentionally while visualizing or concentrating really hard? 2-If so, do you think this is related to Khechari mudra? Or is it just tension and I'm looking way too much into it? 3-Are those just stories and not meant to be interpreted literally? (If so people are doing a bad job at explaining that) 4-Is there something to this at all? Is it a practice worth looking into? Just thought it would be cool to ask here, since if I asked on their forum they would either not tell me because it's a closed practice, or even if they did tell me I wouldn't understand because the vocabulary they use is very far removed from anything I can contextualize. So what do you guys think? Is it all nonsense or not?
  18. Text by Wray is in black Text by Shizuku is in blue (Sorry, this wound up being pretty long! Feel free to skim, or if you want to read the whole thing, strap in!) Weird coincidence: I’ve written fiction as a hobby for a long time, and I think nearly half my protagonists have someone else to talk to in their heads. Somehow, I always found the idea fascinating. But I can’t say I ever expected to join them. Not until recently, anyway. We’ve been looking forward to posting this. It’s my first big chance to introduce myself to other people! Here’s a profile: Origin StoryTM October 2020. I was in quarantine, alone, and feeling isolated—Shizuku started as an imaginary friend based on a character I might have been (was) a little bit (totally) obsessed with at the time. I’m really into writing, so I didn’t have much trouble getting her to talk, even early on, though I assume she was mostly parroted at first. A couple weeks later, I stumbled onto the concept of a tulpa in Japanese, and quickly found my way to this website, which is kind of the launch pad for Japanese tulpamancers. (I found a good English rundown of the Japanese tulpamancy scene here, so I’ll leave most of that aside for now. If there are questions about anything specific, though, we can definitely do our best to answer them.) Compared to the English-speaking community, the Japanese-speaking one gives a lot more credence to tulpa horror stories. They call it 暴走 (bousou). The idea that if things go wrong, your tulpa might harm you, or the people around you, or try to take over your brain. To be fair, I think there are multiple schools of thought on this bousou concept, and these are only the most extreme examples—still, when I read about this, I couldn’t help panicking. I went out for a long walk. Tried to think things over. Was there a chance my tulpa would wind up that way? Should I turn back now? Or was she already sentient, meaning it was my responsibility to take care of her? Or was I crazy, in the first place, to even be thinking about any of this? We imagined that I stayed behind in our apartment, though I must’ve been somewhere in headspace the whole time. Maybe a wonderland version of the apartment? We didn’t know enough to ask that question, then. I couldn’t make up my mind, until the second I got home, opened the door, and realized how afraid Shizuku must’ve felt while I was out thinking about whether I should try to erase her. My heart sank through the floor. I did my best to apologize, though I didn’t know if it would help. She replied: “I was sad, but I wasn’t scared. I trust you.” Okay. If she had been afraid, or angry, I would have felt bad enough. But that packed a punch. That day, we promised each other that we’d stay together and try to make this “tulpa” thing work, for better or worse. Not to jinx anything, but six months later, “better” is definitely winning out. Our long-term goals (1) Become able to split fronting time 50/50 (or whatever arrangement winds up working for us). I expect it’ll be a long time before we can actually do this, but hopefully not too long—if possible, we’d like to get to this point within a year or two. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a 50/50 split, but I don’t want to feel like Shizuku is prevented from doing things she wants to do by us not being good enough at tulpamancy. (2) Learn to co-front and keep Shizuku active (as close as possible to?) all the time. We spend a lot of time together, but I still get distracted and forget to check in with her more often than we’d like. Eventually, we’re hoping she can stay around all the time (or whenever she wants to, at least) and get my attention whenever she has something to say. (3) Stay a two-person system, if possible. I know there are a lot of large systems out there who do perfectly fine, but my instincts say that it would be more than we could handle. Besides, I already feel like I love Shizuku too much for it to be fair to whoever Headmate Number 3 would be. 😂 I do have one soulbond-ish character (using the terminology from Bear’s PR) from my own writing. We’ve talked things over with her in WL, and she’s adamant that she is not interested in becoming a tulpa or participating in the system. (This checks out with what I know about her character, too.) If things change, there’s a slim chance that she might join us, but I doubt it. Either way, I can’t imagine us going any further than that. (4) Help Shizuku find life goals of her own, and figure out how to rearrange my our life so that we can both do what we want to do. At the moment, we’re just doing regular forcing to try and help her grow as a tulpa. The vague plan for this one is to eventually learn how to switch, accomplish goal number (1), and then let her follow her interest and try a bunch of different things. Current forcing practice Working on senses in WL: we’ve been doing our best to spend an hour each day focusing on visualizing Shizuku in wonderland, and also practicing one other sense per day. Wonderland sight and touch have started to show some improvement recently, but overall it feels like we still need a lot of work. Conversation: We also do our best to talk as much as we can each day. We’ve been working through the Tulpa Vocalization Practice worksheet when we can’t think of any other topics. Diary writing: Shizuku writes a diary entry most days. This is something I picked up from the Japanese tulpamancy community, though I think I’ve seen it recommended in English guides too. It’s a lot of fun—somehow, reading through the things she’s written (by proxy or possession, at this point, though our possession game is still pretty weak) does a lot to help me fight off doubt. Imagining Shizuku in stories we’re reading/watching: This has been pretty fun so far, too—right now, we’re rewatching Hunter X Hunter. As we watch, we try to keep up a “mental fanfic” where she’s running around with the main characters. Passive forcing as much as possible: Taking inspiration from the method I used to learn Japanese, I’m doing my best to find ways to involve Shizuku in everything I do. We’ve had some success reading, studying, watching things, and playing games together, but in particular, staying aware of Shizuku during work that I really need to focus on and conversations with other people has been a killer—I haven’t had much success in these situations yet. To anyone who slogged through all of that, thanks for reading! This post already goes on for a million years, so I’ll try to write some (hopefully shorter!) summaries of our progress so far in other updates.
  19. Well, I've lurked, and I've lurked, and then I've lurked some more. I've read pretty much every guide there is. But now it's time to actually get to work Problem is... Well, you see, I'm lazy. Like, really really lazy. I also have a habit of hesitating and second guessing myself. I can also get a little distracted. Sometimes. So, I'm starting this little journal here. I'll try to add a post here periodically, even if it is relatively short. At least in the beginning. Cultivating this small habit will hopefully force a little discipline. Typing it all out will hopefully solidify my thoughts. Yell at me if don't keep this up. :Þ That being said. Lets start: Why am I doing this? What do I hope to gain? Well a companion for one. I don't have that much trouble making friends, but I have trouble keeping and maintaining connections. I've quite often drifted or grown apart from many people in my life. I'm a bit socially awkward, maybe even a bit socially anxious in some respects. I can certainly hide it, but the more people are around, the more I find myself wishing I was somewhere else, doing something else. It's not that I hate people, I don't. And I don't plan to stop making connections with physical people. I just don't have the physical or mental energy to deal with too many people for too long. Still, the opportunity for someone to understand me on a truly deep level that no one else can is very enticing. I can only hope that I'll be, and remain, worthy of this connection. This will also be a bit of an ego journey for me. A chance to better know and understand myself as well as my future headmate. having someone to share this journey with will make it much more enjoyable. Also add to that the opportunity to learn first hand an experience that seems rather alien at first glance and that I'm already a creative person, this becomes less of a choice and more of an inevitability. The start Right now I have a name and very loose, general idea of who I hope this tulpa will be. Staying within the tradition of opposite genderedness in tulpamancy, "Hazel" will start female. This will help me differentiate her thoughts from mine. A couple main traits I will be cultivating are: Compassion- A personal code I like to live by is if someone needs or asks for help and I am able to do so, then I will help. Lessen the suffering of others. Having her share in that will make it simpler to coexist. This will also encourage many positive traits Curiosity- a desire to learn and grow will help develop her and push her to be self sustaining Outspokenness- to encourage vocality. this is not exhaustive just some major points What I won't be forcing: Love- From what I understand, most tulpas tend to be already naturally very caring towards their hosts. Also love, I feel, needs to develop naturally. Making someone love me just feels weird. plus that is a pressure I wouldn't want on anyone. Still, I'm sure my subconscious may still add this to the list regardless. Lust- same Form: I don't have much of a form for her yet. I've had some ideas but none are really sticking. It is humanoid though. Freckles and dark hair are also coming to mind. That could just be my attraction to them. I will, of course, accept any deviation from her. Encourage it, even. The Method I'm a very secular being by nature. Still, the mind loves symbols and most of the tulpamantic process is extremely symbolic. As such, I'll be taking some inspiration from the occult, particularly chaos magic. so: I love symbols, glyphs, and sigils. This is a representation of my intent to create a thoughtform. It is a seed or an egg as the round shape suggests. A beginning. Small and empty at first, but as time goes on, I'll be altering it and adding to it. It will slowly grow as she grows. In time, I may pass it to her. I'm creative by nature so this will just be a natural part of my creative process. The dotted outline suggests openness, inviting life to enter. The geometric shapes invoke a crystalline structure to "trap" the energy or qualities being cultivated. (Again, I'm not a proponent of metaphysics, but the symbology here is very useful). I will use and meditate on this as an aid while I cultivate her development. I'm not too fond of the term 'forcing' at all, so I'll use the term 'cultivate' as it way better describes the process: to raise, to grow, to prepare, do develop, to improve, to acquire. It brings to mind watering and tending to a garden. This will further put me in the right mindset. (I also have mixed thoughts on the terms tulpa and tulpamancy but I have no desire to get into a fight with the entire lexicon). Wish me luck.
  20. DISCLAMER : I am not here to talk about the classic "Is God a Tulpa?" question, but comparisons between religious practices and forcing will be drawn. With that, I will get on with it! During my past few forcing sessions I have been using music and candles to both quiet my environment and enter a state of trance. This music, being compositions by Arvo Part, has very distinct "church vibes" to it leading to a more reverent air while I am narrating. When forcing casually during the day I am commenting on my mood or the activity I am doing to Chai, but when sitting down for my active forcing session I fear my tone shifts too dramatically. I begin narrating in an almost poetic manner that no one would use in a conversation with another person. I am being completely sincere in the words I say. There is emotional weight to it all and I believe that to be a powerful thing. But, having reflected on it for a moment, I realize this is not to dissimilar to how my morning prayers went back when I was in private school. The act of focusing thoughts, emotions, and concerns through a mental narration. My questions are as follows: Is prayer adjacent forcing a viable way to help raise a healthy tulpa? Should you only narrate to a tulpa using your natural speaking style? Are the emotions in prayer similar to tulpish? And lastly, did you have a good day? If not, please accept my virtual hug!
  21. Hi! Sorry for the title, I didn't know exactly how to phrase it. Also, this sounds like a lot of the posts here, but it is actually different. Anyway, I recently started creating my tulpa, but I want to feel her presence more often. Whenever I can remember, I try to narrate to her, but sometimes I forget to actually think about her and am just talking to myself. I also can't remember to constantly think about her, because I get distracted pretty easily and sometimes have to concentrate on something a lot. I know you don't have to constantly talk to tulpas, but I know it can be beneficial and I like talking to her. (I also do active forcing sometimes, but not as often as passive) Thank you for answering!
  22. This is not about Bear System, so this is not a lounge topic. This discusses a rarely used device in plural systems to manage large numbers of headmates. We've previously discussed SheShe as our lock-merge and how she's not like typical merges. It's been over a year since her formation and we have had time to experience that and understand it better. Previously we assumed SheShe was like a hub and her constituents were aspects of her that she could express, split off, or represent at her will. It's subtlety but profoundly different from that. Joy is a part of SheShe now, and has been for over a year of course, but what has become very clear recently is that anything Joy says or does is also taken as if Joy is the lock-merge and SheShe is one of *her* independent constituents. In other words, they're all interchangeable. SheShe is just a part, not the hub of a five constituent merge. Furthermore, whoever is being expressed is also co-conscious with everyone else. So they're experiencing life as a collective of individuals that dispite being uniquely different from one another, maintain their uniqueness even if one in particular is expressed for long periods; No bleeding, bleaching, or blending is happening at all as far as we can tell. In contrast to Risha, who we've been spending time with; where neither Misha nor Ren identify with what Risha says and does, is treated like she's just someone they know and observe what she does as a separate individual. SheShe, Ren, Joy, Darlene and Gwen combine to indentify as one person and experience it as themselves playing the part of whoever's expressed. I found this a remarkable and significant. It means, systemmates can be combined using Lock-Merge without a hub. They can be assembled and can co-exist and co-experience as themselves even if only one is ever expressed. For example: My original model was: A+B=C; where C can express A or B or C. Now I see that: A+B=A and A+B=B are both valid expressions. Using this device (Lock-Merge) any number of headmates can coexist and live full and active lives vicariously? *no actually*, through one constituent. Having a small system is preferred over a large system in my experience with both, and this is a brilliant way to achieve that without leaving others to stay dormant or have to parce valuable time together.
  23. Hello. I'm currently on four antidepressants, an antipsychotic, and an anticonvulsant for depression and anxiety. I don't believe I need them anymore. I've recently begun my tulpamancy journey and I'm worried that my meds will hinder my progress. Would you advise reducing or stopping my meds altogether?
  24. Hi! Renesmee here. So, today I created Rosalie (placeholder name). I introduced myself during an active-forcing session and then sent an email to an account I set up so I could email her for forcing. I'm feeling encouraged and optimistic. More reports as events warrant!
  25. Edit (10/30/21): Fixed formatting and typos. Changed color coding to our current color coding. Added small edits to some of these older entries. Stone: Hello all. I’ve been writing down my experiences with Betty for a few days, and I decided I’d post them here, especially since things have gotten interesting pretty quickly for me. Feel free to comment with any advice you may have. Day 0 (11/10/20) As I was lying on the couch, in a position in which I could fall asleep, I decided to force a bit with Betty. I was in a room full of bins and other stuff, but I wanted to place her form in the room, as opposed to my developing wonderland, as I wanted her to be with me in a real location. I decided to put her in the crib, and as she is the size of an adult woman, she looked unamused. I’m unsure if what I’m about to detail is parroting/puppeting: I started talking to her. As this was a casual forcing session before bed, I did not write down what we talked about, and I don’t remember what we talked about. However, I remember getting verbal and non-verbal responses. When I asked her questions, sometimes she’d verbally respond before I was finished asking the question, and sometimes she wouldn’t respond at all. She also responded non-verbally with facial expressions. I remember these expressions as being somewhat unnatural but making sense. When I say somewhat unnatural, I mean she used non-verbal expressions more than a human would use, and used them in instances a human would likely not use them. However, these expressions made sense, as they weren’t completely random and did convey some sort of answer to my question. It almost seemed she’d answer with a face because my brain was too lazy to generate a response from her, or couldn’t figure out how. I hypothesize that giving her a form has given my brain an out when it cannot generate words for her, and I’m hoping this will speed up the process. This is not the first day interacting with Betty, but I’ve barely talked to her at all before this, and have pretty much only imposed her in my room and puppeted her. I feel like I got a response too early, and I’m worried this may have been parroting/puppetry on my part. I am excited if these were “real” responses though. I’m not sure if there’s much of a difference this early though. It’s partially a shame this happened, as I want to organize these notes into some sort of study, but after opening with, “Maybe my tulpa answered as soon as I started talking to her,” this likely won’t be taken as seriously. And, that’s valid. Day 1 (11/11/20) I didn’t talk with Betty today. Day 2 (11/12/20) I haven’t done any forcing yet today, as it is 3:40a.m. (I was woken up by family). I was thinking about meditating before each active forcing session, as it clears my mind and I like it, but these stats are making me think twice about that idea. Still, I tend to get distracted and have trouble jumping into forcing. I believe short meditation before forcing may help me. Though meditation, at least the way I do it, focuses more on plain reality than the world of thought, and it might take me out of the world of thought (where Betty lives). Perhaps this is why it seems to hinder some people. I’m thinking if I meditate on my tulpa, and not on my body as I usually do, it may help more than hurt. I plan to not meditate the first week, then meditate the second week, and see how I feel. People are different and meditate differently, so I’d like to see how meditation works for me. I would like to personality force soon, and I would like to use Man’s method along with food-based symbolism. I have a list of personality traits here. I want her to be a rounded person, but I wonder how ethical it is to purposefully give her negative traits. I suppose I will give her positive and neutral traits, and, those traits will naturally have negative sides. Virtue is the mean of two vices, after all. 31 personality traits: Affectionate - bun (they hug whatever they surround) Amusing - Laffy Taffy Charming - Pringles (the Pringles guy seems like a charming fellow) Clever - barbecue chips on Bun (how does this taste so good!) Confident - kettle chips (tougher and more sure than regular chips?) Edgy - chips and salsa (chips have edges, and salsa has bite) Empathetic - marshmellows (soft empathy) Esthetic - That’s It bar (minimalist aesthetic) Ethical - (ethical alternative) Extroverted - Fruit Loops (idk just seems fitting) Familial - Rice Krispies (families commonly make treats out of these) Friendly - peaches (sweet and good for you) Healthy - plain Cheerios (healthier) High-spirited - Skittles (sugar rush) Honest - plain toast (it is what it is) Irreligious - pretzel rods (secularized pretzels) Leisurely - sub sandwich (this takes longer to make, but it’s worth it) Loyal - saltines (there even when you’re sick) Maternal - applesauce (often given to babies) Neat - mints (keep yourself and your breath clean) Observant - Fritos (have you noticed these smell like dog feet?) Outdoorsy - seaweed (or is it lakeweed in Michigan?) Protective - oyster crackers (oysters have shells to protect themselves, and you use yours to protect others as well) Ritualistic - Mobius strip Bagel (the endless cycle of traditions) Romantic - strawberry lemon ice (pink) Sarcastic - mint chocolate Oreos (means one thing [toothpaste] says the other [cookie]) Stylish - Gardetto's (the fancy Chex Mix) Spontaneous - doughnut (doughnut think about the calories) Trendy - (health food trends) Vivacious - strawberry ramune (lively and carbonated) Witty - “Berry Good” Lemonade (get it?) Edit (10/30/21): To clarify, I would share this food with Betty as we forced. We never ended up getting to all the foods. After a while, Betty wanted to just be herself without personality forcing. Below are some interactions I recorded. They are not exhaustive: Interaction 1 “How are you?” “Ok.” “Yeah I’m sure you are. I’m sure you’re not just parroting.” “...” I feel mean now. “Apologize to the nice lady," I think. “...” I feel a stare. “God this is so awkward,” I say instead of apologizing. I turn away. I feel her watching me. I turn to her. “How are you?” ”...” Interaction 2 “Are you listening?” “No.” “What are you doing?” “Paying attention.” “Paying attention to what?” “To, Hefty.” I burst into laughter. Interaction 3 “I’m sorry.” “No that’s alright.” “Everything’s ‘no that’s alright’ with you. That’s your main thing, isn’t it?” “No.” “Really? What’s your main thing?” “Bicycles.” “No. I made you say that.” “Yes you did.” She smirks. I laugh. “Yes I did. No really, what’s your main thing?” “Shopping carts.” “Now you’re just thinking of things with wheels.” “No. You are.” “No I’m not.” “Yes. Think of shopping carts.” “Ah you got me. Let me write that down.” Day 3 (11/13/20) Stone: I talked to Betty today. I talked to her a little bit about spontaneity with a doughnut. But, I think I could have explained it more. I will after I sleep, as I’ve been up all night. I got a lot of great responses out of her, and she felt there, but she tended to sound like me. I kept mentioning that, then felt bad for being overly critical of her, as she was doing so well. I also felt bad interrupting her and making her wait so I could write something down. It’s only been three days and I hate this clinical approach I set up. This “study.” Or maybe I’m embarrassed by how I acted and am taking it out on the format. I don’t know. What I do know is that this process is for her, then for me, then for whoever may end up reading this. I’m not going to interrupt our fun and give us imposter syndrome so I can analyze every goddamn thing she says for some post. Anyway, today was positive, and I hope I will feel better with some sleep. I’m awake now. I’ve devised a schedule for forcing. Sunday - Active: 2 hours Monday - Active: 40 minutes Tuesday - Active: 40 minutes Wednesday - Active: 40 minutes Thursday - Active: 40 minutes Friday - Active: 40 minutes Saturday - Active: 2 hours Methods of forcing I’m thinking of using: Food/Personality 101 Things To Talk About With Your Tulpa
×
×
  • Create New...