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What am I doing wrong? Please help!


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Okay, so I've had my Tulpa since mid October 2013, and I can't help but have debilitating thoughts about our progress. I desperately want him to be imposed. Shouldn't I be able to hear his voice with my own ears by now? I don't know how to practice that. I've heard of ways of just having him say a phrase and repeat it over and over in your head, but I still don't hear him with my own ears. And imposition visually...I don't know how to get that to work either. I think if I had one really good guide for each, that I would be able to practice it, but I honestly don't know where to start. There's so many guides on here and I don't know what is best.

 

Is there any way to prove that I still have a Tulpa? That he's still sentient?

 

I rarely feel him touch me anymore. Just small things every now and then. And I'm starting to think that I'm parroting him in my head, like instead of waiting for a response back from him, I feel like I'm making it up as I go along and the only reason it seems to come easy to me is because I've been doing it for so long. But sometimes he still surprises me with the things he says and that has been helping me hold onto hope that he's still sentient.

 

You think the reason why I haven't imposed him visually is because I'm still trying to perfect my visualization?

 

I heard the best way to do that is to actively force, which I try to do almost every night for at least half an hour if not an hour. But sometimes I get too tired and don't do it. And Hyde would rather me go to sleep instead. When I do it, I just put myself into the Wonderland with him, and we hang out and do stuff, and sometimes I feel him touch me while I do that, but it doesn't seem to be helping my visualization anymore. Also, I had another question about Wonderland forcing.

 

Do I wait for him to come into the Wonderland before I get started interacting with him? Or should I call him and he should be able to come into the Wonderland after that?

 

I told him today that I wish I could feel him as actively as I did when we first started in the first couple of months, and he says he's going to try. He keeps saying he's working on this or that, but that we have to work together, and I really tend to doubt him. :(

 

I'm desperate right now. I don't know what to do. I feel like we're at a crossroads and that we won't progress anymore from here.

 

Any help you all can give me and Hyde would be really, really appreciated!

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Doubt here, doubt there, you even have some on your chin.

 

Your biggest problem is your doubt, your slowly killing him. Do you want doubt or a tulpa, because you cant have both. You need to get rid of that doubt and trust that your tulpa is real, just think about all the great times you had, stop and talk to him. This guide and the comments helped me, give it a look http://community.tulpa.info/thread-sentience-tips-for-those-who-are-getting-parrotnoid

As for making it up as you go, sounds like he needs a 'voice' early tulpas will send the host thoughts that you will then translate into mind voice. You need to do some vocality with him so he can start using words instead of thoughts. Co says: [ Dont ever follow any of the guides exactly, there only there as a guideline, instead pick and choose the things you like and feel will give you the best results]

 

Inposition can take years for some people Just keep at it. Talk to him as if he is sitting across the table from you, or ask him to follow you around as you do your day stuff.

 

A schedule would help you two out something him and you can depend on, I am going to force 1 hour everyday, if i get tired I will take a 5 min break the get back to it.

 

Just drop into wonderland and dig a hole or something, he will get curious and come to see what your doing, then he will find you covered in dirt. If you go into wonderland most tulpas will find you to see what your doing.

You could also call out to him, or hold out your hand till he takes it. You could also look for him in the places he likes to go.

 

Co says: [a937539 had a tough time with doubt, similar to what your going through, you really need to trust your tulpa.]

I don't like calling her 'my' tulpa, I don't own her. She is the tulpa that lives with me in our body.

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I can understand your struggle, since I had many problems with doubt in the past too.

 

Now, for imposition, I'd say that it's the thing that takes most time of all, even if I think it depends on the person, so I wouldn't worry about that and the fact that it's taking so long.

 

About the doubt, as I said, I struggled a lot with it too, and that only hindered our progress. With doubt, not only you become stressed about your tulpa's sentience, but also your tulpa will get stressed, trying to desperately prove their sentience to you. In the end, what I did was stop doubting, and start accepting their answers (like Chupi's guide says: http://chupitulpa.tumblr.com/post/36523847799) as their own. To make them a bit more believable, sometimes I'd ask them to repeat themselves, while slightly changing the words, and well, it helped. Now I've got to a point that I can't even parrot them anymore (I get some kind of resistance feeling from them, and a pretty annoyed look), but it took time: it took to us something like 3 months in order to do this.

 

About the mindscape, I usually go there with them. I invite them to come with me, but that's because they're usually with me all the time (it's an habit I got from the past, since they were imaginary friends, I'm used to have them near me).

 

So, I say, to relax a little and trust your tulpa more (while continuing to force, of course!): tulpamancy can take very little time for some, and a very long time for some other people, it's all about patience.

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Thank you guys for your help. Yeah, I constantly doubt and I need to stop. I guess I just have to believe that he's really here, and that all the things we did in the past and I felt from him, were really him and proved that he was real.

 

I already have a "voice" in mind for him that I hear him speak to me in my head, but I just don't know how to hear it outside of my head. Any tips on that would be helpful.

 

Also, how do you know when you're done with Visualization? I struggle seeing his lips move when he talks.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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