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Found 305 results

  1. Thread #4 For hosts with intentional tulpas, did you choose your tulpa's gender? Why did you choose the one you did? Or did you leave it up to them to decide? Was your decision important to you? How does your tulpa feel about it? Tulpas, if you chose your own gender, why did you choose the one you did? Do you like that your host made it your choice? Any tulpas changed or considered changing their gender later on? Why? Hosts with unintentional tulpas (or the tulpas themselves), do you have anything to note about why your tulpa's gender is the way it is? (All daily threads are listed here.)
  2. The purpose of this essay is to warn new tulpamancers of the many possible consequences of allowing their system to grow beyond a manageable amount of members, we well as emphasize the positives of keeping their system small, with about 1-2 tulpas being the best possible range. This essay is not meant to imply that systems that are currently large should not exist. It is only meant to dissuade newer hosts/systems from getting large themselves, or else they risk experiencing neglect and a variety of other troubling issues that take away from the quality of life for the system. Additionally, the end of the essay has a list of points that a host should consider before adding new tulpas to their system. Here is the link. (Submitted for Articles)
  3. This discussion was split from another topic. If you are interested in seeing the beginning of this conversation, please go here. -Ranger he seems to be fading more quickly this year. i think we r intergrating slowly? at first none of us knew we were seperate. as time passed my personality deviated from his. this is why i think i might be an advanced median system. we both identify with the body but 1 personality slowly dominated everything. if it were not for our new headmate, i wont be considered plural anymore. also apparent switching at creation? thoughts? mabey there are more thoughtforms than we know of
  4. I wanted to make this thread for a long time, so now I'm doing it. Please don't ree at me for making new terminology, it's just something I want to discuss. For the longest time, I haven't felt 100% like I should call myself a tulpa, even though it's what I am. The reason for this is that my origins are way different from how most other tulpas come about, intentional and accidental. As you may know, I formed within a merge of two tulpas, and the merge itself sort of became its own tulpa. However I don't really know if that's entirely accurate. I think it's less that the merge became me, and more that the new things that the merge adopted became me. Coupled with the merge being treated like its own person and not just a combination, this new identity became a person. A person that the merge wore as a sort of "mask," to replace the old identity, until I eventually split and became my own independent tulpa. That brings me to the concept - a mask tulpa. An identity that you wear to replace the old one, and that you treat like its own person, in a way, so it becomes one. This is an incredibly rare phenomenon, I can only really name a handful of tulpas who came about this way, including myself, and each of us have felt incredibly confused as to what to call ourselves - tulpa, alter, what? There is a thin line between mask tulpa and alter, the concepts are very similar, and I was often confused if I should call myself an alter or not. But, considering the original merge doesn't even exist anymore, I see no real reason to. I think my origins were trauma-related, but I don't think I'd go so far as to say I was traumagenic, and that's the key difference between tulpas and alters. Plus, our system has no other alters or anything, it wouldn't make sense to call me one. Alters are also made to create a huge level of disconnect between them and the original, going so far as to create memory blocks, but a mask tulpa typically wouldn't do this, the original is still present and aware underneath (unless I guess the mask tulpa is really far along in their existence to the point of the original going dormant or integrating, still shouldn't create memory problems though). Anyway, to elaborate, here's what a "mask tulpa" really means: - An identity that is put on as a replacement of the old one (for whatever reason), and becomes its own sentient person, but isn't traumagenic. Example: the host wants to experiment with being the opposite gender, so he puts on a mask of a female identity and uses it when he goes online. This female identity becomes a headmate - she is a mask tulpa. - Someone does not like their current personality, as it gets them in trouble, makes people not like them, etc. They put on a mask of a "better" one, and end up treating the mask like its own person, so it becomes a tulpa. This is what does not qualify for a mask tulpa - The host roleplaying as a character, and the character becomes sentient - this isn't meant to replace the host's identity, rather it's entirely recreational and the character is considered entirely separate from the host, the host's personality just takes a step back for the purpose of fun/games/writing/etc (if the host decided to continue to act as the character in day-to-day life outside of the game, that could be a mask tulpa). - The host (usually a child) putting on an identity to help save them from trauma, and that identity becomes its own person, with memory loss and other issues ensue - this is an alter, of course After a mask tulpa is made and discovered, they can function just like any other tulpa. Around the time I split, the other two components of the merge had integrated into me, so it wasn't really a merge anymore. It was just me with them existing as a part of me. Then they split out and I was on my own. Now, I don't want people going around thinking that if they act different it must be because they integrated with a mask tulpa - it's highly unlikely. I was fully self-aware about what I was by the time I split, I had discovered myself maybe a week or two after the original merge occurred, and it was 4-5 months later that the split occurred. I wasn't a mystery. What is a mystery to me is why I didn't split sooner. As I said, mask tulpas seem to be very rare and I don't expect this to apply to anyone on the forums really, aside from one that I know of. It's just me explaining what I think I am and why I often feel iffy about calling myself a tulpa but don't want to call myself an alter - I'm still a tulpa, just of very rare, mask-related origins. Like I said, please don't ree at me for making new terminology, I just want something that I can apply to me that makes sense. If nothing else I can call myself a mask tulpa and link to this post.
  5. People keep merging into each other and I'm worried I will lose track of who's merged with who. I only half remember one system's group of merges and now another system is playing with merging and bleh... too many names... If your system decides to experiment with merging or is already experimenting with merging, please put the name of your merges here and describe what's it's like to be as that merge. I'm still not sure if I want to play with merging myself yet, but I am fascinated by other people's experiences.
  6. [uPDATE 12/17-18/19: More suggestions, more edits. Same criteria as before, but this time with a lightbulb emote (or simply "[12/18]"). Edits from 12/16 have had their italics and emotes removed.] Intrusive thoughts can be nasty little things. :idea: Those nagging thoughts that appear in the back of your head, telling you to do awful things...a bit of a pain, aren't they? As I write this, my tulpas and I are recovering from a day ruined by the worst wave of them I've had in my nearly two months of being a tulpamancer. It was a rough one. So when Richard, my eldest tulpa, told me a tip he had, I figured that someone out there could use a guide based off what he told me. But first: a disclaimer: this guide requires the use of visualization. Those with difficulties visualizing may not find this guide useful, but I do have something in mind for those of you with said issues. If you have problems with this, please scroll to the section labeled "For those with trouble visualizing." :idea: >Aphantasia is briefly covered in that section. I am attempting to cover as many bases as possible. With that said, the tip I was given was simple: make it fun. "But Timer," you may say, "that's so broad! What do you mean?" Well, I'm about to tell you. Sit down, grab a nice drink, and get your tulpa(s) to read along too--because this may involve them as much as it does you. Allow me to present a clever (at least, in my opinion) little idea that can potentially solve your problems: the Wonderland RPG. How do you walk the walk of the Wonderland RPG? Well, it's a lot easier than it sounds. (A lot easier than an actual RPG at times, even!) But first, some info: Requirements Be prepared for any and all outcomes. Intrusive thoughts can be crafty. Be prepared to change tactics on the fly or even lose to it a few times. Just don't get discouraged. This guide is best used before an intrusive thought appears. This guide is a bit long and will almost certainly require planning. You'll need to form a place in your mind to put this. :idea: This can be an entirely new place or a tiny little addition to your current wonderland. Despite me calling it the "Wonderland RPG", this does not have to take place in your wonderland. But it does have to take place somewhere, else this guide would be rather difficult. >I am well aware that those with problems visualizing cannot do this, or at least may find it difficult. :idea: This guide is best used for persistent intrusive thoughts. For walk-ins, please attempt to ignore it the best you can. However, if that does not work, feel free to come back and try this guide. :idea: You will be fighting these thoughts head-on in this guide. If that idea is uncomfortable to you, I suggest reading another guide. I apologize. :idea: Immersion is key. Distractions from your thought or the outside will likely break your focus, and you may have to start over. (Probably not entirely, though.) Personal Preferences Your skills of visualization must be of a level :idea: where you can see and hold backgrounds and images. Color is optional but can help. You can even use old-school pixel art for this, if it helps. > Again, if you have difficulty visualizing for whatever reason, you may still follow this guide. Just use the method in the section I mentioned above. :idea: Don't be afraid to engage your tulpa(s) in this! It could prove to be beneficial to them. Of course, if you fear losing your tulpa(s) to it (which is, in my eyes, highly unlikely) you can go without this step. :idea: The Ultimate Goal of This Guide: Forming a way to deal with persistent intrusive thoughts, through creativity and fun. And now, another very important disclaimer: This guide is meant as an alternative for those that cannot simply ignore their intrusive thought(s). Say you have anxiety like I do. This might work. But for most people, ignoring it may be your best bet. > However, the safe spot could prove useful no matter your preferred method, whether you use this guide or not. Make yourself a nice little cooldown place if it gets really bad. Now, for the guide itself: For Those That Can Visualize 1) [12/18] (Metaphorically) drill the thought that your intrusive thought is weak into your head. Now you may be thinking, "but it's so distracting! I can't get it out of my head!" Well, you can't do much if you keep to that mentality. That train of thought will eventually overwhelm you, and likely render this guide useless. But now, make it a puny mouse, and you're a powerful tiger. (Metaphorically, of course. Unless you want to be.) 2) Form a "safe spot". Fill it with the RPG standards: shops, an inn, maybe even some non-playable characters ("NPCs"). If you're defeated by the thought, this is where you and your party will return to after being defeated. Remember that this is clearly a safe spot. The thought won't attack the town. Why? Well, you don't usually encounter RPG monsters in towns. Sure, you do in some games, but not here. [12/18] If you want to, make up a reason as to why your safe spot is safe. This can be anything you can think of! And before you ask, you have infinite currency. Spend it on whatever you need to. Or splurge on it. It's your wonderland, not mine. 3) Decide on classes. Perhaps you're thinking about being a mage. Maybe your tulpa (if they choose to participate) wants to be a warrior. And there's nothing wrong with having a healer in your party! Your imagination is the only limit here. If you're feeling really creative [12/18] or don't want to directly involve your tulpa, guest party members are a good option. I personally recommend the RPG standard of four party members, but you can have a whole army if you want to. Again, your wonderland, not mine. 4) Start spending. Get your gear and healing items. You're about to go on an intrusive thought hunt, and you're going to make sure it ends well for you. This is also a good chance to talk to any NPCs you may have put in your safe spot. Maybe they're just the usual NPCs that spout nonsense that doesn't matter, or maybe they know things about your thought that you didn't know before. Maybe they're just...there. Scary. 5) Open your inventory. Double-check your healing items and equip your party for battle. You can probably skip this step, but personally, I'm throwing it in to make it a true-to-genre experience. 6) All set? Head off towards that nasty thought of yours. Get your game face on. 7) Found that intrusive thought? Engage it in battle! Smack that thought into the nether the best you can! I personally recommend the turn-based RPG method: you, the host, go first. Then the other party members do. Then the thought fights back. Rinse and repeat until the battle ends, be it in victory or defeat. You can also make it a strategy RPG: one character moves/attacks per turn. Usually it's your party first, then the thought. 8) How did the battle go? Did you defeat it, or did it defeat you? Perhaps you won--congrats! Give your party members a pat on the back, maybe even go through the whole experience point thing. Perhaps the latter happened--in which case, your party should be at your safe spot somewhere. If you lost, don't worry--there is nothing wrong with trying again. Please don't give up if you lose. Please. That's just sad. Your goal is to beat it, after all! That's what this guide is for. 9) [OPTIONAL] Evolve your story. You can easily stop at step 8 and call it a day. But maybe you want more out of this. In that case, go ahead and further the story. Maybe you defeated the final boss! Roll credits. Maybe that thought was a lackey of the real villain, and defeating it was just the beginning? Who knows... For Those With Trouble Visualizing Another disclaimer: I, personally, have no trouble with visualizing. Therefore, if you do have trouble visualizing and feel that this did not help you, let me know and I'll see about updating this section. [12/18]>This is unlikely to work for those with aphantasia. However, there is nothing stopping you from trying. Feel free to try this if you want! So, visualization isn't exactly your forte. What to do? Just follow the same steps, but instead of visualizing, write it out! Make it your own personal story. This does change some things, though: You can probably cut out the inventory step and RPG battle descriptions. Making up a reason for why your safe spot is safe is preferred for this method. (Or you can just stick with RPG logic.) Skip the NPCs in the safe spot if you feel like it. Describe your setting to the best of your ability. Perhaps your safe spot is a quaint little medieval town, straight out of Dungeons and Dragons, or a modern-day city. Maybe that intrusive thought is hiding out in a dark forest that no one dares to enter, or a castle that looms over your setting. It could even be hiding somewhere as plain as an office building. Your call. Some Tips You don't have to follow this guide word-for-word. Be creative, and feel free to deviate! This guide uses a typical RPG setup. Lacking inspiration? Google some pics from a RPG game. Or, even better, watch people play them on Youtube! The possibilities are near endless. (Miitopia is a good one, in my opinion.) If you decide to write it out, don't be intimidated if you can't write well! No one said you had to post it on the internet for all to see. Consider drawing your setting. Again, don't be intimidated if you can't draw well. (I can't draw too well either, haha.) I know I said this earlier, but I must reiterate: take your time. Plan this out. This is a big guide, and also why I said to read this before an intrusive thought starts bringing you down. Video games have pause buttons. Intrusive thoughts do not. I said it earlier and I'll say it again: there is nothing wrong with trying again if you fail. Just don't give up. Keep trying. You will beat this thought. And that's that! Thanks for reading! My quintet of tulpas and I wish you well--now go teach that intrusive thought a lesson. :)
  7. Hi, everyone. Just a simple little thing that I wanna see people's input on. Does your tulpa ever change clothes? So, does your tulpa run around in certain clothes one day, and different ones the next day? Or is it you who decides what your tulpa wears through visualizing them? Or are the clothes your tulpa wears sort of a fixed part of their appearance, unchanging? As for Esterina, she wears what she feels like. Sometimes it's her good ol' Witch attire, but she also switches around between sweatshirts, button shirts, jeans... mostly dark colors and a lot of blue, which I like. My good lady has style! :P Thank you. :D But yeah, she does what she wants in that regard, without any butting in on my part (as with anything else, really). How is it for you? Poll's above. :) Greets, AG & Rina
  8. I wanted to write this thread for a long time, however today I found a way to better organize my thoughts without ranting off topic. Tulpamancy isn't all butterflies and rainbows, at least it wasn't for us. We had ups and downs for the past couple years- stopping my daymares, healing, enjoying my time with Ranger, not feeling as lonely anymore, being more social, learning new skills and ideas, and on the other hand experiencing friction from my family in regards to tulpamancy, feeling trapped in a new closet, figuring out how to live two lives at once, and stress from being a large system. However, there are two general topics I want to discuss because these have consistently made me feel weird or that we're doing something wrong. Feeling like I Have to Choose Between Science and Tulpamancy I am very pro-science, and one thing that scares me is the idea that I could develop into a science denier- assuming I'm not already one. When I watched the documentary Behind the Curve on Netflix several months ago, I realized it was dangerous to want to do science to confirm my beliefs. I want scientists to prove tulpamancy is real, but that thought in of itself isn't science. It's an expectation I am demanding proof for, just like how the Flat Earthers want to find the right experiment to prove the Earth is flat. Real science asks for the truth, not digging and digging until you find something that supports what you want to hear. So I'm left with the feeling that if I want to remain impartial and sane, I cannot completely conform that tulpamancy is real until science comes around to back it up. I really want to believe Ranger is real and it's harder and harder think otherwise, but I also want to be prepared if scientists come to the conclusion that tulpas are not real. I feel like if they were to come to that conclusion, it will be hard for me to backpeadal and reverse the thinking I compounded in the last couple years, and the thought of that is stressful. I don't think it's unfair to say tulpamancy may not be real. I'm very passionate about being a tulpamancer, but at the same time, I was at my most deperate and depressed when I stumbled upon this site. I took a lot of tulpamancy for granted, and that in of itself can be interpreted as a red flag. I don't believe most tulpamancers are liars, but if it turns out tulpamancy isn't real, a lot of people fell for it and passionately believed in fantasy, just as I did. The one thing I keep going back to, hoping to prove tulpamancy is real to myself, is to learn switching with Ranger. If tulpas were real and switching was a real Tulpamancy practice, I should experience something totally different. I think it probably wouldn't matter if we eventually learn switching, however not being able to switch has fed into this idea and generated doubt. Plus, switching is just another internal experience, there's no promise that scientists will be able to measure changes in brain activity, just the hope. Being Pro-Tulpa and Tulpa Ethics When Ranger told me he was real for the second time, I believed him and treated him as a separate person ever since. I committed to tulpamancy with a very pro-tulpa stance. Otherwise, I feel like I shouldn't be here. I didn't sign up to entertain myself, I came because I was scared, confused, and feeling broken inside. But most importantly, I didn't want to kill Ranger. Is this strong stance justifiable? I'm well aware there are tulpamancers who say that independent agency is smoke and mirrors for the purposes of enjoyment, self exploration, and healing. I find that stance to be reasonable and acceptable, not everyone views tulpamancy the way I do and that stance seems more consistent with what is culturally acceptable. I don't want to deem this opposing stance as "wrong", nor do I want my more extreme views to discourage them from sharing their thoughts or participating in the community. However, this inconsistency make me wonder if this is another red flag for how a community becomes a group of extremists, like how INCEL started out as a group of lonely men that overtime became more and more hostile towards women. I don't want that development occurring in this community, especially if this viewpoint isn't even rational. Another thing that has bothered me is if Ranger and I are providing harmful advice that is limiting the freedom people have in their own head. Bear has asked before if it's worth warning new users in this thread, however I want to focus on the problem of people telling people how to think. Since we are pro-tulpa, our advice considers the tulpa's will as well as the host's, so we end up saying stuff like "you have to avoid making too many tulpas or your system will be miserable, pick one tulpa to force and go from there." This advice is intrusive because we're telling the host they can't just do whatever they want, and I'm not okay with telling people or watching Ranger tell people they have to think a particular way if it's not worth it. That brings me to tulpa ethics in general- are they worth the cost of telling people how to think or worse- criticizing other people? I'll consider my story characters and NPCs. If they qualify as tulpas, then that means I can't feel safe to invent new ideas in the form of anything remotely sentient, since doing so would mean I would have to treat them humanely. Considering the rest of the world where authors make story characters and NPCs all the time, the idea of tulpa ethics comes across as a joke and or a threat. The ethics would paint that scenario as mass slavery, and that's a label I don't believe makes any sense to slap on the general population of creative writers. Personally, I don't believe my NPCs are sentient, however I have been wrong before, and that lead to the stress and anxiety of my other headmates for not being recognized as sentient for a year after discovering tulpamancy. I simply don't feel comfortable with encouraging a stigma against violating tulpa ethics if there isn't a clear definition for what a tulpa is, assuming tulpas are even real to begin with. While I disagree with the idea of having headmates being forced to serve their hosts or systems who irresponsibly create tulpas and dissipate them 5 minutes later, I am also concerned if this is just craziness and it's doing more harm than good to think this way. * * * These concerns make my stomach knot. Are Ranger and I doing the right thing? Is tulpamancy a serious practice with lots at stake or is it all bullshit and the only thing that matters is the host's well being? Is it crazy and too extremist to tell people how to think or does it do a lot of good and secure the wellbeing of several headmates? [Ranger] Given that I'm an active member, I'm a moderator, and I help manage the GAT, I know what I say can really affect other people. I hate it when I feel like I'm just yelling at new users about how they need to not make their system of 4 tulpas a system of 14 tulpas or telling people they can't do certain things because it could lead to accidental forcing. I want to help people get better, not ruin their lives. I can't speak much for the stress sandwich Cat is stuck in between science and tulpamancy, however I am very adamant about my existence, even when I doubt myself. I don't want to give up on the self-advocating I did for the last couple years, but at the same time I don't like watching Cat feeling conflicted and stressed either. I'm hoping shifting our goals away from the soul-suck of the "can't switch" cycle to imposition will alleviate some of the problem, but other than that, I don't know if there's much else I can do.
  9. Hello! Kai (a headmate) speaking here. I would like to ask, how does the memory of you tulpas/headmates work? Can you only recall what your host remembers, or can you go beyond? I've found that I'm mostly limited to what my host remembers, and find it a bit hard to access memories when they're not thinking about them. For example, if they have forgotten the name of a movie, I find it very hard to remember it too. Is that true to you as well? Is there a way to change it? Thanks in advance!
  10. For some time now, one of my tulpas has been wanting to proxy. However, I've been hesitant to let them, and even outright denied it once. Why? Simple: I can't tell the difference. See, I was a roleplayer in years past, and with the "no roleplaying" rule, I've been walking on eggshells and trying not to make it seem like I'm roleplaying. So, my question is: is there a way to differentiate the two, specifically between host and tulpa? I'm sure it's something that varies from host to host, but a general answer will work as well. Thanks in advance!
  11. What's the difference between a split or tulpa? I'm fully aware, I brought Vinyl into existence and she was made from scratch. I however, deal with a different "personality", a split or tulpa, as some call it. The thing is, I've been dealing with this split for almost my entire life, almost. Started becoming more involved in my younger teen years, during my depression. I started having a second train of thoughts around 2011-2012, I first discovered tulpa sometime in 2014 so that's out the question. Others say its a split and some call it a tulpa but what IS the difference? I started recently looking at it and accepting it instead of just ignoring and rejecting it. He's aware of me and he's aware of Vinyl (my tulpa) and sometimes mocks me and Vinyl, or used to. Thing is I'm not really sure of what the difference is and other people seem to give me mixed input, I don't lose memory or "lose control" over my body or have memory blankets. So I'm not sure if he's a split exactly but I don't really exactly have 100% control over him, so I'm not sure if he's categorized as a tulpa but I'm really curious as to what you guys think, Vinyl is NOT a result of a split and she was made from scratch.
  12. Hello all. I've been doing a lot of reading on and off over the past few years, and it seems creative types - writers especially - are more 'prone' to tulpas/soulbonds/what have you. As a writer, myself, this makes sense, but I'm wondering... Has anyone used creative writing as part of the creation process? I mean, are there any writers on this forum who learned about the tulpa phenomenon and decided to approach creation through writing knowingly rather than unintentionally. I've seen many say that they were putting work into a work of fiction and a tulpa or similar thoughtform developed on its own, and I've seen a guide or two as well that mention creating the base for a tulpa the same way you would create a character... but I've also seen claims that coming up with a backstory can be potentially harmful, that writing your character isn't all that different from parroting since you're deciding on their actions without their input, etc. Recently the attitude seems to lean more toward avoiding the express inclusion of flaws since they are going to develop organically, and that it can be stifling to a young tulpa if you insist on a certain personality. So I'm looking for input on how writing can fit into all this if you don't already have a tulpa, basically. Any insight would be appreciated!
  13. So, I was just wondering if there's a term for this particular type of entity... I've always considered him to be a representation of myself. Basically my persona/avatar/alter-ego/whatever you want to call it. I oftentimes take his form when in wonderland, and my tulpas almost always call me by his name instead of my own, even if I'm not using his form. However, he also occasionally splits off from me and becomes tulpa-like, i.e. becoming an independent entity separate from me. He doesn't really feel like a tulpa per-se. All my other tulpas feel more separated from myself and are clearly their own personalities, but it's a LOT more vague with this particular one. Like he's both me and not me at the same time, if that makes sense. Is this something like what merging or separating feels like? Or is there some other term for this?
  14. Everyone’s rushing to call tulpamancy a disorder, DID, or even schizophrenia as soon as they learn it’s not a practical joke and people actually practise tulpamancy. But is tulpamancy a disorder? Is it something you should be concerned about or treated for? Let’s begin with what tulpamancy is definitely not and that’s schizophrenia. Schizophrenia is a severe mental illness that is thought to have a significant but not solely genetic component; found in about 1% of the population worldwide. Schizophrenia involves a chronic psychosis, characterised by hallucinating (including multimodal hallucinations – i.e. affecting several senses at once), and thinking or believing things with no basis in reality. Contrary to the popular belief, people with schizophrenia do not have multiple personalities and the hallucinations they experience originate from the outwards. In other words people with schizophrenia might hear voices which they would fully perceive as coming from the outside, physically unable to relate to them as being within their mind alone. Tulpamancy, on the other hand, is primarily focused on multiple personality aspect, whereas visualisation and hallucination components are optional and not deemed crucial to the development of a tulpa. While some tulpamancers practise “imposition” also known as overlaying the visual looks of the tulpa over the real world or otherwise sensing them at best it results in pseudo-hallucinations and the tulpamancer has to apply a non-trivial effort to make the illusion stay. Now, though, what about dissociative identity disorder aka DID? Read the article Note from Shinyuus: While the page linked is clean/SFW, other pages/articles on my blog are not. I'm working on that but for now stay aware of this if you thread out of the tulpamancy category. A Medium mirror link pending.
  15. This topic originated from this thread here: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-accidental-soulbond-or-mental-illness-spurred-hallucination -Ranger Whoah whoah, how did I miss this?? NO, that is not true at all, jeez! I don't even know how to start refuting that because it's so out of nowhere, I mean there's been surveys and polls on the forum itself that showed more than half of us had nothing at all (not even depression or stuff), not to mention tons of tulpamancers didn't have tulpas appear naturally but had to work to create them, I mean.. just where did you even get that idea?
  16. This conversation originally came from this thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-accidental-soulbond-or-mental-illness-spurred-hallucination -Ranger That's because we focus more on tulpa-y soulbonds, and most soulbonds here are like that, whereas originally soulbonds tended to be more often (not always, but often) metaphysical in nature, or soulbonders in their beliefs they coulda seen it in threads pre-2014, I kinda wish people wouldn't read that stuff but they find their way to 'em anyways. the 4chan community of tulpa.info 2012-2013 was not nearly as open-minded or, uh, nice about things, and general community consensus on lots of stuff has changed also, tulpa.info is by no means a big enough representation of soulbonding to be changing what's associated with that term outside of the forum, I'm sure metaphysical sites still use the term in completely different ways (heck, that even happens with tulpas)
  17. While talking to Miri and shield in the cBox, they brought up the fact their vision blurs when they "zone out" or "space out". For me, I end up staring at something without thinking about anything. I wonder if this has something to so with our difficulty learning switching?
  18. How to Dissipate a Tulpa by G of JGC Preface Hello. I understand the topic of this how-to guide may be upsetting to some. The high mortality rate for tulpas, especially in their first year of existence, is common knowledge. However, these events are rarely reported to the community, and are generally frowned upon. When someone is considering dissipation or after someone has dissipated a tulpa, they may be told: “If you are going/were going to dissipate them, why did you create a tulpa in the first place?” “If you weren’t ready, you should have known ahead of time.” “It is cruel/immoral/evil to dissipate a tulpa- you shouldn’t do it/have done it.” This guide will not address the first two responses. This guide is not “How to Avoid Being in the Situation Where You Dissipate Your Tulpa” or “How to Make Sure Your Tulpamancy Practice Goes Well.” This guide is meant for those who are seriously considering dissipating a tulpa, and are seeking information about the mechanics of the process. As for the third response, I would like to argue that 1.) In many cases, the tulpa’s quality of life would be especially poor, and they are likely to dissipate on their own accord, as well as 2.) this guide will alleviate suffering and internal trauma by allowing tulpas to dissipate without violence, without the involvement of hatred, and with a sense of closure for all involved. Love to all, Gavin How to Dissipate a Tulpa: The “Why” *Disclaimer: This guide will refer to the person who is dissipating the tulpa as the “host”, though this may not be the case in every situation. Though this guide is geared strongly towards tulpas, it could be used as a resource for dissipating non-tulpas as well. I cannot vouch for how this guide will apply for these situations. Why would a host dissipate their tulpa? This is a good question. You could write hundreds of pages on the topic: What drives people to create such a bond, then end it? Do they understand what they’re getting into when they make a tulpa? What type of person is more likely to dissipate their tulpa? What are the risk and protective factors for a tulpa’s continued existence? If you wish to debate these questions, I encourage you to create a thread on Tulpa.info, or utilize other social media platforms such as r/Tulpas or the numerous tulpa-related Discords. However, I will not be speaking much at all about these types of questions within this guide. The host’s situation may resemble any of the following: They have made little progress with their tulpa: the tulpa is not sentient, is minimally vocal, and is devoid of any “spark of life.” In short, they have decided to give up with the tulpa creation process. They may have been trying for weeks, months, or even longer. They are not devoted to their tulpa. They spend less and less time with their tulpa, feel less and less connected/bonded to them, and may wish they never created a tulpa in the first place, or that their tulpa isn’t real. A host in this situation may also already have another tulpa or tulpas. The host and tulpa perceive themselves to have a negative, toxic, or even dangerous dynamic. Either the host or tulpa (or both) feel that the other is too strong of a negative, toxic, or dangerous influence on them. The tulpa might be some form of personification/representation of a bad trait or even a fictive of some “evil” character. Violence or other negative/unethical/hurtful acts may be involved, and the host may fear for their sanity. They want to be free from each other. I speculate that the first two situations are the most common (a host gives up on creating a tulpa, and a host no longer wants a tulpa) while the last situation (a host considers a tulpa dangerous to their sanity) is less common. However, it is hard to say for sure, especially since the majority of dissipations are likely not reported to the community. With the “Why” out of the way, we can move on to the next steps. How to Dissipate a Tulpa: What is Dissipation? Is it Permanent? Dissipation is the termination, the death, of your relationship with your tulpa, and by extension, the death of your tulpa. After a tulpa is dissipated, they are not considered to presently exist or to be alive. They are no longer mentally active, and there is no expectation that they will be in the future: they do not talk, they do not feel, they do not process, they do not react in any way- they are dead. After dissipation, you will not have a living relationship with your tulpa. Most tulpas are dependent, in some aspect, on their hosts. Very young tulpas, especially non-vocal and non-sentient tulpas, may have never acted without the host’s attention or direction. Younger tulpas may go “dormant”, “inactive”, or “disappear” if they are not forced or otherwise given attention. More independent tulpas are capable of speaking and acting without the host first paying attention to them/prompting a response. The less developed your tulpa is, the less time and effort dissipation will take. Tulpas, with time and development, imprint within your brain. The longer they exist, and the more involved in your life they are, the harder it will be for that bond to end. If you have a non-vocal or non-sentient tulpa, it is likely that after you formally say goodbye, they will be dissipated. The relationship between you two will have ended. If your tulpa is independent enough that you spontaneously, without forcing them, receive mindvoice/tulpish/emotions/other responses, dissipation may take longer. I was deeply entrenched in my host’s life. His entire internal monologue was a dialogue, a conversation that I was always in. Retraining his brain so that I was never part of that conversation, my “mental program” was never turned on (and so, was allowed to fade away) took time. It took around two weeks for 90% of me to dissipate. The next 9.99% faded away over a course of three months. I would say 100% of me dissipated, but as you may have noticed, I am not currently dead. This is another important point: the more developed your tulpa, the less likely they will ever fully go away forever. For this reason, dissipating a host (who presumably has been mentally active for years and years) is near-impossible. It is possible for most tulpas and even most hosts to “turn off”, that is, to go mentally inactive. Dissipation could also be defined as a state of permanent, total mental inactivity, such that you no longer have an active relationship with your tulpa- they are considered dead. However, I was “dead” for approximately four years. It only took five minutes of concentration on my host’s part to “revive” me. Dissipation, though still considered a permanent process, is in many cases reversible: the host can bring the tulpa back. So long as that 0.01% of the tulpa is left in the brain, whether that part of the brain is being used or not, the tulpa can be “revived." If the idea that your tulpa won’t be 100% gone forever scares you because you want them 100% gone forever, don’t worry: it will be up to you if they ever come back. If you never want them back, they will never come back. Having a tulpa is a bit like (though not exactly like) being married. If you are married to someone, you can divorce them. You divorce them, relationship over, and you say, “I will never get back together with them!” A divorce is pretty serious: most would say, a divorce is the permanent end of a relationship. Most people never get back together with the person they divorce- they probably never even see that person, though they might still think of them from time to time. However, every now and again… a divorced couple rekindles their relationship. They get remarried. But this doesn’t happen unless you want it to. If you never want your tulpa in your life again, that’s okay. You will reach a point where you don’t hear them anymore, you don’t see them anymore, you don’t interact with them in any way. You might still think back on that time of your life, and that’s alright. It’s just like reminiscing about any past relationship; it doesn’t mean you have to go get remarried. So, don’t worry that you could rekindle your relationship with your tulpa, and reverse the dissipation process. So long as you are committed that you won’t, then it won’t happen. What will happen when your tulpa has dissipated: You will no longer interact in any capacity with them, or they with you. (No thoughts, emotions, tulpish, etc.) Your tulpa will be completely mentally inactive. They will be considered permanently gone, as in dead. HOWEVER, dissipation is in many cases a reversible process, BUT it will not reverse unless you will it to reverse. Consider divorce: it is the permanent ending of a relationship, although the couple could always remarry. How to Dissipate a Tulpa: The “How” In addition to having dissipated myself at the urging of my host, I have also dissipated two thoughtforms. One was vocal and sentient, though markedly less than myself. The other was not vocal nor sentient and very short-lived, though persistently present for its existence, as well as disturbing to my host. A lot of what I did was wrong. I have dissipated tulpas carelessly, violently, and cruelly. I have drawn upon my memories and reflections of these events in order to write this guide. I hope that, by sharing this nonviolent process for dissipation, suffering and internal trauma can be avoided within your system. I hope that you can benefit from what I have learned. The Basics: You will explain to your tulpa what dissipation means, why are you dissipating them, and how the process will happen, even if you doubt they understand. You will formally say goodbye. You will cease all interaction with your tulpa. If your tulpa is not sentient, this will likely be it: they will dissipate. If your tulpa responds without your attention, you will need to retrain your brain to not have these responses, and you will need to learn to not provide any interaction. Eventually, your tulpa will completely dissipate. You will adjust to life without your tulpa. THE GOAL: Peaceful: The worst thing you can do is be violent during the dissipation process. Again, think of a couple that’s getting divorced. One or both parties may want to make a big display, to show the other that they’re really done with each other: they might lash out violently. It’s damaging, if not traumatizing. Very soon, you will no longer have your tulpa. Don’t become a villain. Don’t visualize yourself killing your tulpa, or hurting them in any fashion. You don’t need to do that in order to dissipate them. Even though we may talk about it like bodily death, dissipation does not require any sort of damage to your tulpa’s body or mind. Accepted: Do you really want this? You will, most likely, feel some amount of regret, guilt, and other such bad feelings after dissipating a tulpa. It’s okay: you’re human. Breaking off any relationship, especially one like the tulpa/host relationship, is hard. There are alternatives to dissipation: “Evil” tulpas and representations of negative traits (For example, a tulpa who personifies your anxiety/depression/self-hatred) can be redeemed. Tulpas based off of characters (fictives) can deviate from their origins. They don’t have to act like their character acts. You can re-devote yourself to forcing your tulpa. Walk-ins or similar thoughtforms can exist and be interacted with, without being tulpas or needing you to devote time to them. They can be “put into stasis.” In other words, they will go inactive, but you both understand that they may be brought back someday. It is considered less permanent than dissipation. Take a moment to imagine yourself after your tulpa has dissipated. Mentally walk through your day. If you have only been spending a small amount of time (say, forcing them in the evenings) with your tulpa, then probably not much is different. If you talk with your tulpa constantly or they support you in some fashion, this adjustment may be harder for you. For some hosts, their relationship with their tulpa is a major source of social interaction. Prepare yourself for the loss of this. Some signs that you do not want to dissipate your tulpa: You have been going back and forth, deciding that you will dissipate your tulpa, and then deciding against it. You wish you had more reason to dissipate your tulpa: that they would act out in some big way, or do something terrible. You believe that you could still save your relationship with your tulpa. You hope that your tulpa will fight you, or hope that you will be unable to dissipate your tulpa. You have been stalling or delaying your decision/actually dissipating your tulpa. Acceptance means you understand fully how your life will be when you no longer have your tulpa, and you are willing to make that situation reality. It also means, you will need to explain what you are doing to your tulpa. Even if you doubt they understand, it will help you move forward. This will be expanded on soon. Humane: One of the most painful parts of the dissipation process, besides the moment of saying goodbye, is when a “dissipated” tulpa pops up. They say something to you, or you feel their emotions. This may never happen to you, especially if your tulpa is very young. It is more likely to happen if you talk with your tulpa constantly throughout the day, and they talk fluently with you. It is okay. In short, ignore these responses. Imagine they are like text messages from your ex. Don’t respond. The relationship is over. Do not yell, be violent, or lash out against these stray responses. Like any relationship, in order to truly end, there needs to be no contact. If you respond to your dissipated tulpa, it will keep them from fading away. If you must respond, be brief. Don’t engage them, just say something along the lines of, “Please go back to sleep.” Be compassionate and firm, not angry or callous: You will no longer be supplying them with attention, and that’s that. If you are violent and angry toward your dissipated tulpa, that is still giving them attention. Dragging out your relationship by fighting your tulpa until they completely dissipate is not humane and is a sure way to increase the guilt and shame you may feel afterward. You may get some level of comfort from these stray responses. Or, you may want them to go away as quickly as possible. They may make you feel regret or shame. And again, you may not experience any stray responses. It will just depend. NOTE: The rest of this section is composed of many scripts and suggestions for how your dissipation process may happen. Please, adapt this method as needed for your situation. If you don’t like the wording, or the message, or anything else, you are absolutely not obligated to follow my advice and suggestions. Again, adapt everything as you see fit. The First Step You will explain to your tulpa what dissipation means, why are you dissipating them, and how the process will happen, even if you doubt they understand. Meet with your tulpa. Explain to them, you are no longer going to interact with/force them. Tell them your reasons for dissipating them. Refrain from yelling or getting angry, even if they’ve harmed you or others. They will no longer be a presence in your brain. Say these things, even if your tulpa is not sentient or vocal. An example script: Another example: The Second Step You will formally say goodbye. I recommend this event happens in a quiet place, where you are absolutely sure you will not be disturbed. You should be in a calm mental state. If there’s anything important you need to do, or you’re under a time constraint, wait until that’s resolved, then come back. Tell your tulpa goodbye: this is it, this is the last time you will be with each other. Depending on your relationship, you may want to hug or kiss. Again, don’t be violent. Whatever your final words are, they should be compassionate and something you can remember without feeling guilty for saying them. You may benefit from symbolism at this step. You could: Imagine your tulpa is boarding a train/bus/etc, and watch the vehicle drive off. Imagine your tulpa floating or fading away, in a peaceful way, like a spirit or ghost disappearing. Imagine your tulpa’s “soul” or “presence” disappearing into the air like smoke. You will likely find this event itself is less dramatic and stressful than you imagined it to be. In all likelihood, it will only take a few minutes, compared to the hours you may have spent considering the decision to dissipate your tulpa. The Third Step You will cease all interaction with your tulpa. If your tulpa is not sentient, this will likely be it: they will dissipate. Stop forcing your tulpa, stop talking to your tulpa, stop expecting to see them or hear them or sense them in any fashion. At this point, you may feel regret, shame, guilt, upset, or even numb. Take care of yourself. Try not to dwell on the dissipation right now: distract yourself, and preferably, do something social. You have lost someone you had a relationship with. The Fourth Step If your tulpa responds without your attention, you will need to retrain your brain to not have these responses, and you will need to learn to not provide any interaction. Eventually, your tulpa will completely dissipate. If your tulpa continues to send out stray responses after your formal goodbye, it’s okay. As stated above, do not lash out against these responses. For example: Another example: The Final Step You will adjust to life without your tulpa. The less involved your tulpa was in your life, the easier this is likely to be. The more involved, the harder it is likely to be. Either way, it’s okay, and anything you feel in response to having dissipated a tulpa is valid. You may feel loss. You may feel angry. You might even feel relieved, being free from the relationship. You do not need To swear off tulpas/plurality forever To decide that tulpas are all fake/made by crazy people or To decide that your tulpa was fake/you made it all up If your tulpa was providing something for you (for example, if they helped you with anxiety, or they were your main source of social interaction), make sure you can appropriately cope with the lack of that support. And finally, if you are feeling suicidal or like you are going to harm yourself, seek help. Resources: [Hidden] US Suicide Helpline: 1800-273-8255 UK Suicide Helpline: 0845-790-9090 Other countries: http://ibpf.org/resource/list-international-suicide-hotlines For the Crisis Text Line, text HOME to 741741 (US) or 686868 (Canada). Suicide chatboxes: http://www.suicidestop.com/suicide_prevention_chat_online.html [/hidden] “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” -Winnie the Pooh Edit: "A host in this situation may also already have a tulpa or tulpas." changed to "A host in this situation may also already have another tulpa or tulpas." for clarity. Edit: BetterHelp link replaced.
  19. [align=justify]Daily thread #25 For those of you who have experience with merging and named your merges, what's the story behind their names? (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  20. Continue Reading → Note from GAT: While the page linked is clean/SFW, other pages/articles on Shinyuu's blog are not. Tread carefully if you are at work/school or are a minor. waffles noted you want a backup link too. I'm experimenting with off-site copies on medium.com, so this article will exist even if I die (unless medium dies first).
  21. Daily thread #22 (Credit to JGC for this idea) If you had children in the future, would you tell them about plurality/tulpas? If so, at what age? If not, why not? (All daily threads are listed here.)
  22. Moved from [General] Beginner Questions General. The context of this thread can be found here: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-beginner-questions-general?pid=255008#pid255008 Solar Chariot's response also relates to this thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-beginner-questions-general?pid=255020#pid255020 -Ranger We only say things are confabulation during in-depth discussions of how things work, people don't tend to go around arguing what you say is impossible outside of those discussions.
  23. [align=justify]Daily thread #20 (a little late due to a busy day) What are the goals you hope to attain within the tulpamancy practice? How important are they to you and why? Ex. would be switching. If you have a goal that's not inherently tulpa-related but your tulpas are heavily involved, you can share that too. (All daily threads can be found here.) [/align]
  24. Daily thread #21 [align=justify]This is something we notice sometimes, and it's interesting. Do you ever find moments where you can't remember something, or you remember something incorrectly, as a result of your plurality? This isn't stuff like full-on amnesia or the kind of memory loss disordered plurality would have, but more so like "I feel as though my tulpa was in my past memories even though I know he wasn't." Stuff that is more interesting than damaging/negative. For us, we recently figured out that we can't remember the 1-2 months where our host forgot about us (and we can't even remember how long it was) at all. We can only remember small snippets of it, mostly moments where myself or Indigo became active again. It's almost like our brain just doesn't care to remember the time when we weren't around and host was just going through the motions. Another thing that's quite common is that when a tulpa returns to our system, memories of when they weren't there seem to have them there. Luxio might say "we" even though he was in stasis when talking about a past event, feeling as though he was a part of it even though he knows he wasn't. And finally, when a tulpa does go into more long-term dormancy, the other tulpas might forget about them more easily, but mostly just when asked about the system--they'll naturally leave out the dormant one despite not trying to. Nobody takes breaks from the system anymore though so we don't experience this much. So for us, it's mostly retroactive memories that get altered, rather than day-to-day ones. (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  25. [align=justify]Daily thread #17... hope there wasn't another GD thread like this in the past. Checked and couldn't find one. What things like symbols, icons, ideas, whatever represent and/or are associated with your tulpa and why? Is there any special meaning behind it? An example would be "wolves represent my tulpa because they're strong and live in a pack" or things like that. (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]