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About Me





Found 267 results

  1. People keep merging into each other and I'm worried I will lose track of who's merged with who. I only half remember one system's group of merges and now another system is playing with merging and bleh... too many names... If your system decides to experiment with merging or is already experimenting with merging, please put the name of your merges here and describe what's it's like to be as that merge. I'm still not sure if I want to play with merging myself yet, but I am fascinated by other people's experiences.
  2. Can a headmate (tulpas or hosts or others) live as a pet/animal in wonderland? I know it's a bit dubious to choose to make a non-human tulpa or especially to treat them like a pet rather than an equal. But is it an inherently bad setup for a headmate (and a full headmate, not an NPC) to live as a pet? I'd throw in the caveats that they are fully aware they live in a human body, have a human mind and human thought capabilities (even if they choose not to speak human language), they aren't deluded in any way about the circumstances, and that if at any point they choose to stop acting like an animal (to have a long discussion or vote on matters in-system) it'd be perfectly acceptable. But other than that. Everyone treats them as an animal and they act as an animal/pet. -J
  3. Hi, everyone. Just a simple little thing that I wanna see people's input on. Does your tulpa ever change clothes? So, does your tulpa run around in certain clothes one day, and different ones the next day? Or is it you who decides what your tulpa wears through visualizing them? Or are the clothes your tulpa wears sort of a fixed part of their appearance, unchanging? As for Esterina, she wears what she feels like. Sometimes it's her good ol' Witch attire, but she also switches around between sweatshirts, button shirts, jeans... mostly dark colors and a lot of blue, which I like. My good lady has style! :P Thank you. :D But yeah, she does what she wants in that regard, without any butting in on my part (as with anything else, really). How is it for you? Poll's above. :) Greets, AG & Rina
  4. I wanted to write this thread for a long time, however today I found a way to better organize my thoughts without ranting off topic. Tulpamancy isn't all butterflies and rainbows, at least it wasn't for us. We had ups and downs for the past couple years- stopping my daymares, healing, enjoying my time with Ranger, not feeling as lonely anymore, being more social, learning new skills and ideas, and on the other hand experiencing friction from my family in regards to tulpamancy, feeling trapped in a new closet, figuring out how to live two lives at once, and stress from being a large system. However, there are two general topics I want to discuss because these have consistently made me feel weird or that we're doing something wrong. Feeling like I Have to Choose Between Science and Tulpamancy I am very pro-science, and one thing that scares me is the idea that I could develop into a science denier- assuming I'm not already one. When I watched the documentary Behind the Curve on Netflix several months ago, I realized it was dangerous to want to do science to confirm my beliefs. I want scientists to prove tulpamancy is real, but that thought in of itself isn't science. It's an expectation I am demanding proof for, just like how the Flat Earthers want to find the right experiment to prove the Earth is flat. Real science asks for the truth, not digging and digging until you find something that supports what you want to hear. So I'm left with the feeling that if I want to remain impartial and sane, I cannot completely conform that tulpamancy is real until science comes around to back it up. I really want to believe Ranger is real and it's harder and harder think otherwise, but I also want to be prepared if scientists come to the conclusion that tulpas are not real. I feel like if they were to come to that conclusion, it will be hard for me to backpeadal and reverse the thinking I compounded in the last couple years, and the thought of that is stressful. I don't think it's unfair to say tulpamancy may not be real. I'm very passionate about being a tulpamancer, but at the same time, I was at my most deperate and depressed when I stumbled upon this site. I took a lot of tulpamancy for granted, and that in of itself can be interpreted as a red flag. I don't believe most tulpamancers are liars, but if it turns out tulpamancy isn't real, a lot of people fell for it and passionately believed in fantasy, just as I did. The one thing I keep going back to, hoping to prove tulpamancy is real to myself, is to learn switching with Ranger. If tulpas were real and switching was a real Tulpamancy practice, I should experience something totally different. I think it probably wouldn't matter if we eventually learn switching, however not being able to switch has fed into this idea and generated doubt. Plus, switching is just another internal experience, there's no promise that scientists will be able to measure changes in brain activity, just the hope. Being Pro-Tulpa and Tulpa Ethics When Ranger told me he was real for the second time, I believed him and treated him as a separate person ever since. I committed to tulpamancy with a very pro-tulpa stance. Otherwise, I feel like I shouldn't be here. I didn't sign up to entertain myself, I came because I was scared, confused, and feeling broken inside. But most importantly, I didn't want to kill Ranger. Is this strong stance justifiable? I'm well aware there are tulpamancers who say that independent agency is smoke and mirrors for the purposes of enjoyment, self exploration, and healing. I find that stance to be reasonable and acceptable, not everyone views tulpamancy the way I do and that stance seems more consistent with what is culturally acceptable. I don't want to deem this opposing stance as "wrong", nor do I want my more extreme views to discourage them from sharing their thoughts or participating in the community. However, this inconsistency make me wonder if this is another red flag for how a community becomes a group of extremists, like how INCEL started out as a group of lonely men that overtime became more and more hostile towards women. I don't want that development occurring in this community, especially if this viewpoint isn't even rational. Another thing that has bothered me is if Ranger and I are providing harmful advice that is limiting the freedom people have in their own head. Bear has asked before if it's worth warning new users in this thread, however I want to focus on the problem of people telling people how to think. Since we are pro-tulpa, our advice considers the tulpa's will as well as the host's, so we end up saying stuff like "you have to avoid making too many tulpas or your system will be miserable, pick one tulpa to force and go from there." This advice is intrusive because we're telling the host they can't just do whatever they want, and I'm not okay with telling people or watching Ranger tell people they have to think a particular way if it's not worth it. That brings me to tulpa ethics in general- are they worth the cost of telling people how to think or worse- criticizing other people? I'll consider my story characters and NPCs. If they qualify as tulpas, then that means I can't feel safe to invent new ideas in the form of anything remotely sentient, since doing so would mean I would have to treat them humanely. Considering the rest of the world where authors make story characters and NPCs all the time, the idea of tulpa ethics comes across as a joke and or a threat. The ethics would paint that scenario as mass slavery, and that's a label I don't believe makes any sense to slap on the general population of creative writers. Personally, I don't believe my NPCs are sentient, however I have been wrong before, and that lead to the stress and anxiety of my other headmates for not being recognized as sentient for a year after discovering tulpamancy. I simply don't feel comfortable with encouraging a stigma against violating tulpa ethics if there isn't a clear definition for what a tulpa is, assuming tulpas are even real to begin with. While I disagree with the idea of having headmates being forced to serve their hosts or systems who irresponsibly create tulpas and dissipate them 5 minutes later, I am also concerned if this is just craziness and it's doing more harm than good to think this way. * * * These concerns make my stomach knot. Are Ranger and I doing the right thing? Is tulpamancy a serious practice with lots at stake or is it all bullshit and the only thing that matters is the host's well being? Is it crazy and too extremist to tell people how to think or does it do a lot of good and secure the wellbeing of several headmates? [Ranger] Given that I'm an active member, I'm a moderator, and I help manage the GAT, I know what I say can really affect other people. I hate it when I feel like I'm just yelling at new users about how they need to not make their system of 4 tulpas a system of 14 tulpas or telling people they can't do certain things because it could lead to accidental forcing. I want to help people get better, not ruin their lives. I can't speak much for the stress sandwich Cat is stuck in between science and tulpamancy, however I am very adamant about my existence, even when I doubt myself. I don't want to give up on the self-advocating I did for the last couple years, but at the same time I don't like watching Cat feeling conflicted and stressed either. I'm hoping shifting our goals away from the soul-suck of the "can't switch" cycle to imposition will alleviate some of the problem, but other than that, I don't know if there's much else I can do.
  5. Hello! Kai (a headmate) speaking here. I would like to ask, how does the memory of you tulpas/headmates work? Can you only recall what your host remembers, or can you go beyond? I've found that I'm mostly limited to what my host remembers, and find it a bit hard to access memories when they're not thinking about them. For example, if they have forgotten the name of a movie, I find it very hard to remember it too. Is that true to you as well? Is there a way to change it? Thanks in advance!
  6. For some time now, one of my tulpas has been wanting to proxy. However, I've been hesitant to let them, and even outright denied it once. Why? Simple: I can't tell the difference. See, I was a roleplayer in years past, and with the "no roleplaying" rule, I've been walking on eggshells and trying not to make it seem like I'm roleplaying. So, my question is: is there a way to differentiate the two, specifically between host and tulpa? I'm sure it's something that varies from host to host, but a general answer will work as well. Thanks in advance!
  7. What's the difference between a split or tulpa? I'm fully aware, I brought Vinyl into existence and she was made from scratch. I however, deal with a different "personality", a split or tulpa, as some call it. The thing is, I've been dealing with this split for almost my entire life, almost. Started becoming more involved in my younger teen years, during my depression. I started having a second train of thoughts around 2011-2012, I first discovered tulpa sometime in 2014 so that's out the question. Others say its a split and some call it a tulpa but what IS the difference? I started recently looking at it and accepting it instead of just ignoring and rejecting it. He's aware of me and he's aware of Vinyl (my tulpa) and sometimes mocks me and Vinyl, or used to. Thing is I'm not really sure of what the difference is and other people seem to give me mixed input, I don't lose memory or "lose control" over my body or have memory blankets. So I'm not sure if he's a split exactly but I don't really exactly have 100% control over him, so I'm not sure if he's categorized as a tulpa but I'm really curious as to what you guys think, Vinyl is NOT a result of a split and she was made from scratch.
  8. Hello all. I've been doing a lot of reading on and off over the past few years, and it seems creative types - writers especially - are more 'prone' to tulpas/soulbonds/what have you. As a writer, myself, this makes sense, but I'm wondering... Has anyone used creative writing as part of the creation process? I mean, are there any writers on this forum who learned about the tulpa phenomenon and decided to approach creation through writing knowingly rather than unintentionally. I've seen many say that they were putting work into a work of fiction and a tulpa or similar thoughtform developed on its own, and I've seen a guide or two as well that mention creating the base for a tulpa the same way you would create a character... but I've also seen claims that coming up with a backstory can be potentially harmful, that writing your character isn't all that different from parroting since you're deciding on their actions without their input, etc. Recently the attitude seems to lean more toward avoiding the express inclusion of flaws since they are going to develop organically, and that it can be stifling to a young tulpa if you insist on a certain personality. So I'm looking for input on how writing can fit into all this if you don't already have a tulpa, basically. Any insight would be appreciated!
  9. So, I was just wondering if there's a term for this particular type of entity... I've always considered him to be a representation of myself. Basically my persona/avatar/alter-ego/whatever you want to call it. I oftentimes take his form when in wonderland, and my tulpas almost always call me by his name instead of my own, even if I'm not using his form. However, he also occasionally splits off from me and becomes tulpa-like, i.e. becoming an independent entity separate from me. He doesn't really feel like a tulpa per-se. All my other tulpas feel more separated from myself and are clearly their own personalities, but it's a LOT more vague with this particular one. Like he's both me and not me at the same time, if that makes sense. Is this something like what merging or separating feels like? Or is there some other term for this?
  10. This topic originated from this thread here: -Ranger Whoah whoah, how did I miss this?? NO, that is not true at all, jeez! I don't even know how to start refuting that because it's so out of nowhere, I mean there's been surveys and polls on the forum itself that showed more than half of us had nothing at all (not even depression or stuff), not to mention tons of tulpamancers didn't have tulpas appear naturally but had to work to create them, I mean.. just where did you even get that idea?
  11. This conversation originally came from this thread: -Ranger That's because we focus more on tulpa-y soulbonds, and most soulbonds here are like that, whereas originally soulbonds tended to be more often (not always, but often) metaphysical in nature, or soulbonders in their beliefs they coulda seen it in threads pre-2014, I kinda wish people wouldn't read that stuff but they find their way to 'em anyways. the 4chan community of 2012-2013 was not nearly as open-minded or, uh, nice about things, and general community consensus on lots of stuff has changed also, is by no means a big enough representation of soulbonding to be changing what's associated with that term outside of the forum, I'm sure metaphysical sites still use the term in completely different ways (heck, that even happens with tulpas)
  12. While talking to Miri and shield in the cBox, they brought up the fact their vision blurs when they "zone out" or "space out". For me, I end up staring at something without thinking about anything. I wonder if this has something to so with our difficulty learning switching?
  13. [align=justify]Daily thread #25 For those of you who have experience with merging and named your merges, what's the story behind their names? (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  14. Daily thread #22 (Credit to JGC for this idea) If you had children in the future, would you tell them about plurality/tulpas? If so, at what age? If not, why not? (All daily threads are listed here.)
  15. Moved from [General] Beginner Questions General. The context of this thread can be found here: Solar Chariot's response also relates to this thread: -Ranger We only say things are confabulation during in-depth discussions of how things work, people don't tend to go around arguing what you say is impossible outside of those discussions.
  16. [align=justify]Daily thread #20 (a little late due to a busy day) What are the goals you hope to attain within the tulpamancy practice? How important are they to you and why? Ex. would be switching. If you have a goal that's not inherently tulpa-related but your tulpas are heavily involved, you can share that too. (All daily threads can be found here.) [/align]
  17. Daily thread #21 [align=justify]This is something we notice sometimes, and it's interesting. Do you ever find moments where you can't remember something, or you remember something incorrectly, as a result of your plurality? This isn't stuff like full-on amnesia or the kind of memory loss disordered plurality would have, but more so like "I feel as though my tulpa was in my past memories even though I know he wasn't." Stuff that is more interesting than damaging/negative. For us, we recently figured out that we can't remember the 1-2 months where our host forgot about us (and we can't even remember how long it was) at all. We can only remember small snippets of it, mostly moments where myself or Indigo became active again. It's almost like our brain just doesn't care to remember the time when we weren't around and host was just going through the motions. Another thing that's quite common is that when a tulpa returns to our system, memories of when they weren't there seem to have them there. Luxio might say "we" even though he was in stasis when talking about a past event, feeling as though he was a part of it even though he knows he wasn't. And finally, when a tulpa does go into more long-term dormancy, the other tulpas might forget about them more easily, but mostly just when asked about the system--they'll naturally leave out the dormant one despite not trying to. Nobody takes breaks from the system anymore though so we don't experience this much. So for us, it's mostly retroactive memories that get altered, rather than day-to-day ones. (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  18. [align=justify]Daily thread #17... hope there wasn't another GD thread like this in the past. Checked and couldn't find one. What things like symbols, icons, ideas, whatever represent and/or are associated with your tulpa and why? Is there any special meaning behind it? An example would be "wolves represent my tulpa because they're strong and live in a pack" or things like that. (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  19. Daily thread #12 A user (Sky Trio) asked this question on the Discord, so I thought I'd ask it here. Credit to them for the idea. How did you/your tulpa choose your tulpa's birthday? Was it the date you started forcing them, the date they became sentient, the date they became vocal, etc? If they were accidental, how was their birthday chosen? For us, all of our intentional tulpas had their birthday set as the day they were originally created, even if they were sentient/vocal later. Never made too much sense to us for people to set a tulpa's birthday as the latter option, but I suppose different strokes for different folks. Sometimes it's hard to know when a tulpa is sentient or vocal since those can be gradual things. Luxio's birthday used to be the day he arrived at the system (we started forcing him but then stopped, and he came back a while later), but we figured that was inconsistent with the rest of us, so it was set to his creation date. Our three unintentional headmates obviously don't have such an easy way to select their birthday, especially the two older ones. JPM and HJP were characters the host developed at a young age who became sentient at some point. We've done a lot of searching to find when they could have actually been created but haven't been able to pinpoint it. We know JPM must have existed sometime in 2011, and HJP probably came around in the fall of 2012. JPM's birthday was set as June 18, 2011, since that's Paul McCartney's birthday and it was an easy choice, and HJP's birthday was set as September 1, 2012. September 1 was his birthday in the story. Piano's birthday was set as January 26th, 2017, since that was the earliest possible day he was created (as he was unintentionally formed), though his existence was confirmed around Feb 1 or 2 of that year. We've considered changing it to the day he was discovered, but figured it could stay January 26th just to keep it consistent with the rest of us. (All daily threads are listed here.)
  20. [align=justify]Daily thread #16 This is a silly question, but yesterday I realized that while us tulpas had favorite colors and animals and whatever, we didn't have favorite/lucky numbers! [Exaggeration]The realization hit me like a million tons of bricks and I went into a deep existential panic.[/exaggeration] Anyways, does your tulpa have a favorite/lucky number and how did they pick it? Usually birth date is the obvious choice, but perhaps there are other ways too.[/align] (All daily threads are listed here.)
  21. [align=justify]My system wants to aim to pose new general discussion questions each day, or at least often. The first one is: when describing what a tulpa is, what sort of word(s) is/are the most appropriate and why? Personality, identity, ego, etc? Why would some words be less appropriate than others? If you really like one word but dislike another, what's your reasoning behind it?[/align] Note: this is more about words that describe what a tulpa is on a technical level, rather than words like "friend" or "family." Please share your thoughts and discuss. (All daily threads are listed here.)
  22. [align=justify]Daily thread #9 This is something light. What kinds of symbolism do you use that you find most effective for certain things? Not really much else to say about that question. Have at it! (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  23. [Duck] I'm upset that I woke up tired. I was tired last night and this morning, but I don't know why. I'm mad because I want to play. Duck didn't spend a whole lot of time being active lately. I checked on him last night and he was too tired to talk. When I went to check on him again, he was feeling a little bit down. After I cheered him up some, he wanted to play with Fish (another systemmate) but didn't because he felt too tired. In general, the Grays will stay active for about an hour at a time and then they will want a break.
  24. [align=justify]This is daily thread #8 Very often, systems experience intrusive thoughts that might interrupt their forcing or cause distress/confusion to the system. We speculate that turning your focus so much further inward than the average person makes intrusive thoughts way more common and/or noticeable. Because of this, it is always beneficial for a system to know how to recognize them, deal with them, and prevent them from happening in the future. Hopefully, systems that have to deal with intrusive thoughts will be able to reach a point in their existence where they calm down and either don't happen anymore, or happen rarely and don't cause as much of a disturbance. Personally, our system has reached this point. The only intrusive thoughts we get anymore are the kind typical for anybody, not the all-out disruptive kind we used to get. We used to get them REALLY BAD, now we don't get them at all really. What are good ways to deal with intrusive thoughts? How do you get to a point where you have them less often or not at all?[/align] [align=justify] We always try to portray intrusive thoughts as something that just happens sometimes, usually during periods of instability within a mind, or when the system has a desire that they want fulfilled and the brain obliges by creating characters that aren't really sentient or developed, but can appear that way. Most often, they just happen when something goes wrong, like how your stomach being upset can make you throw up. What do you do when you do that? Easy, you just flush it, brush your teeth, and get about your day. You can take medicine to prevent it from happening again, and perhaps avoid whatever made you sick in the future. What you don't do is dwell on it, keep thinking about it, keep talking about it, and keep doing the things that made you sick while you are still vulnerable. If you do these things, it will only make it worse. You really just need to get on with your day and do your best to solve the issue. With intrusive thought, best to just shrug it off and walk away. Don't dwell on it and don't focus on it. You don't even need to talk about it, especially not while it's still a problem. It's just a thing, that's all, nothing to fuss over or worry about. If you can't get it off your mind or it's still bothering you, do your best to distract yourself and forget about it. Play video games, do schoolwork, take a nap, whatever you need to do to forget about it. Over time, it'll fade from your mind and be nothing but a memory. But what of the people who "can't" just shrug it off? Well, to me it looks like their #1 problem is the fact that they think that they "can't." That shows me that they have a mindset that they aren't in control or that the intrusive thought holds some power over them. They need to first realize that it doesn't. The system controls the mind and the thoughts within it. If they still can't shrug it off, then they should try what I said above, just redirect their attention and forget about it. Don't treat it as a big problem, don't put a lot of focus on it. Do your best to just walk away if you "can't" just make it disappear. Some systems use symbolism or have a dedicated intrusive thought fighter in the system. Usually when they do this, it tells me that they don't think they have control, and they need something special to help them get rid of intrusive thought. Those things are fine to use as long as they remember that they are in control, and that the intrusive thought is only as big of a deal as they make it out to be. You can do what works for you, but remember that it's all under your own control. Poof it, walk away from it, forget about it. For how to get them to stop happening in the future, I think just continually believing that you have the power in your own head, and getting rid of the intrusive thoughts like they're nothing, will contribute to them stopping over time. Additionally, the system should try to diagnose the cause for each of the intrusive thoughts. Is the system getting along? Is the system trying to find things to blame their problems on? Is it depression? Did something bad recently happen? Is the system having a hard time handling their emotions? Is the system desiring a new tulpa too much? And so on. If they can diagnose the problems, they can work to solve them, and stop intrusive thought from happening again because of it. The key thing to remember is that, when it does happen, it doesn't hold any power over you. Treating it like it does will only make it happen more often. Nothing belongs in your head that you and your systemmates don't want, and you can get rid of it as easily as you can flush a toilet, then walk away from it and let it fade from your mind.[/align] (All daily threads are listed here.)
  25. Thread #4 For hosts with intentional tulpas, did you choose your tulpa's gender? Why did you choose the one you did? Or did you leave it up to them to decide? Was your decision important to you? How does your tulpa feel about it? Tulpas, if you chose your own gender, why did you choose the one you did? Do you like that your host made it your choice? Any tulpas changed or considered changing their gender later on? Why? Hosts with unintentional tulpas (or the tulpas themselves), do you have anything to note about why your tulpa's gender is the way it is? (All daily threads are listed here.)