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A "Good Age" to Start?


CNGB

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Hello, one and all. I promise I won't ask if it matters if I talk out loud or in my head to my tulpa. ;)

 

Actually, I don't have a tulpa, and I'm not entirely sure I want one--which is why I'm just going to mull that over for at least half a year before I do anything. The idea of a tulpa is still fairly new to me so I've been reading the FAQs and the glossary and I've gotten through a couple of the guides. One of which actually said that the writer would not suggest for a thirteen year old to create a tulpa (and went on to say that teenagers in general probably shouldn't). And honestly? I agree.

 

I'm seventeen as of now, and a month after half a year I'll turn eighteen. That's still in the adolescent age, though. There probably have been people my age and younger to successfully create tulpa, but I was wondering what you fine people think is a better age to start? I doubt there's a correct answer to this, but I also think that if I decide to do this then I should make sure I'm ready for it. (And really, whether the general opinion is if I should wait or if I should be okay starting now, I'm going to wait at least six months to start. It's a big decision.)

 

Oh . . . well, I am a teenager and I suppose that a lot of people would probably suspect that I might want to use a tulpa for sex. So just to clear that up, no . . . no, actually I'm asexual. Sex is boring to me.

 

Thank you so much, in advance, for anyone who answers.

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Hi, I'm actually asexual as well, glad to meet someone else like me :)

 

I was actually fourteen when I made my first tulpa, Quilten, but I took into serious consideration whether I was going to be able to handle him both time-wise and concerning maturely going through the process. I spent about three months before making the decision. I decided that I could, and anything I couldn't do too well I had enough motivation to work towards being better at. I don't think anyone under the age of thirteen should be making a tulpa, for lack of knowledge of the world if anything.

 

As long as you understand how much work this will be and that you might not be able to handle it, go ahead. Just be careful in making sure that you have the time, mental stamina, and motivation for it.

 

Good luck, and I hope I could help!

[align=center]Even though my username is that of my tulpa, Quilten, my name is Phaneron, the host, who does all of the actual posting.

Tulpas: Quilten, Jira

[/align]

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Maybe people made the correlation that teenagers that may be fluctuating with hormones and all wouldn’t be a practical age range for creating a tulpa. But even then, having some kind of sexual experience where one would literally feel their tulpa is being tortured, or forced out of their will to do would probably take a lot of imaginary skill and concentration that I’m sure most wouldn’t have the attention span to tolerate it all in the first place without some practice. It’s just an over generalization on age, and correlation doesn’t always equal causality, i.e., just because a person is younger doesn’t mean they’ll inherently be sexual deviants or savages; there can be individuals much older that would have more perverse thoughts, and little to no acknowledgment of their conscience.

 

There could be people in their 30s and beyond that still have a child-like disposition, and if we’re talking about those much older (60+) that could become senile and have some regression in their disposition, it would be fairly ageist of us to mandate the required/recommended age to start. One would generally presume that the older the person is, the more cumulative experiential learning they would have intact that could tremendously help them assess themselves in the tulpa journey simply because they could take those fundamentals they learned, and apply them for their own personal and subjective meaning of partaking in creating and living with a tulpa.

 

But again, correlations and generalizations don’t always mean it will be an inherent and consistent quality for anyone of an older age. Whether it’s learning to handle your emotions, tolerating/coping with certain strife (e.g. existential, psychological), or just knowing how to overcome tribulations, and potentially see them as a supplement in your conquest to expand and improve, one would presume that someone of younger age may be fixated on other things (e.g. validating their sense of identity through peers, media, etc.)

 

But there’s always going to be someone of younger age that may think more than usual, that aren’t fixated on things we feel younger individuals are predisposed to do. They may end up creating tulpas that contribute so much in their development, and vice versa for them to the point where their mental maturity would be much greater than someone way older than them. Of course, even though it’s tempting to presume tulpas would inherently be empathetic and understanding of the struggles we go through, sometimes someone who lacks experiential learning in life assessment might take things the wrong way, and they go in a series of unfortunate events.

 

Although, that could be a good start in gaining experience in the first place, but the idea that people probably have with older individuals doing this than younger people is just knowing how to assess things better (generally). But with a phenomenon like this where anything can happen, and there aren’t really things to constrain what’s really wrong and right, and what one ought to do, and not to do with tulpas, you could presume that having some kind of resilience (emotionally/mentally) along with perseverance to use retrospect to analyze what you did before, and go back to living in the moment, and then going back and forth with that can be learned at any age (at least to the point where their cognition is suitable for that).

 

There are a lot of factors that anyone can use to argue on age and tulpas, but to pose questions on that would also presume what would be the proper age to interact with dream characters in your natural sleep that could easily emulate qualities behind treating a thought-form as sentient.

 

I know people from other forums that are 13-17 years of age that lucid dream, or just recall their dreams in general, and the literally have a lot of potential in gaining that mental maturity if they know how to assess it right. But again, with younger people that may be more likely to find something to do in their quotidian lifestyle, sometimes the risks they feel would be involved with tulpas would be too much.

 

I’m 21, so we’re only 4 years apart, and I hardly think that within a 4 year difference that I would have so much intelligence, resilience, and consistency that would be unrivaled to anyone else. Who are we to presume who’s more dominant in this journey than others, or weaker than others? Some people hold delusions of grandeur and feel they have everything solved out, which may be the reason why they may suggest others to not make tulpas at a young age until they get on their level of a special snow flake.

 

I know that I’m still learning as I go, even if there may be an impression that I know quite a bit, but I really don’t. I’ve gotten so far, more than my disposition before finding out about dreaming and tulpas, thanks to the companions in my natural sleep, and the ones I intend to live with for as long as I live.

 

As for sexuality and sex in general, if you see it as how you would want to inform, treat, and be thoughtful of another individual you would have affection and feelings for, I highly doubt anyone can stop you from doing whatever you want to do in the future. It could be more of seeing it as wanting to reduce inner turmoil, and building rapport by learning how to love parts of yourself in ways you never knew were possible rather than following mental constructs from a set of people.

 

I generally see maturity as taking ownership of the things you’ve done, rather than a list of do’s and don’ts to imply there’s maturity. Again, opinions will vary.

 

 

 

TL;DR (may need a TL;DRception here):

 

You may have your moments where you need someone to be your pillar of strength in your darkest hour, and I feel people like that idea in some way (with their own intensities of struggles in life), and other reasons for making a tulpa. It would be a discrimination for people to be dogmatic on the required age on starting (e.g. ageism).

 

People of older age may physically look old, but their mental disposition may not always be in synch with that. They may have more experiential learning, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they have the perfect way to assess all struggles if they choose to create a tulpa. They may have a better grip on handling their emotions, or tolerating them, but it doesn’t mean they would have resilience of a thousand oxen in their oncoming challenges with the concept of tulpa that would question the very essence of how they validate and conceptualize reality.

 

I’ve seen various age groups here, and seeing someone who claims to be 30-40 years of age go down to tears (positively, or negatively) in their posts makes me feel that age can only go so far for certain circumstances for people to really believe a certain age range should be the mandate to start this journey. Sometimes, they do this for your own best interests, and most of the time, they do this so you don’t repeat their mistakes.

 

But I honestly feel that someone that tries to absolve themselves from mistakes, errors, and such would be constrained to only imagining how it would feel if a tulpa was dissipated, or how it would feel to be in a constant state of repression that ends up holding them back in understanding how to overcome their struggles. Sometimes seeing that pain come into your perception of reality, whether mental or physical, is what probably helps build the cumulative experiential learning where things become a little easier.

 

 

But it’s really up to you, and what you want to create personal significance in. It’s not the end of the world if you choose not to do this now. People may go through a lot of changes, and see things in a new light from time to time, and I highly doubt that younger people are somehow prohibited in experiencing that.

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I believe that reason is more important than age in this. If you want to create a tulpa, a concious, feeling creature so you can use it as a personal stress reliever and beat the hell out of it, don't do it. If you just want one to make it your sex slave and humping pillow, don't do it. If you want to go through with this for the companionship and are actually making an effort to care for this thought form, then by all means go ahead.

I am fourteen years old, I'm often concidered mature for my age, and it seems as a friend of mine put it that age isn't equivalent to maturity. I actually think of my tulpa as I would a family member or a close friend, not a sex object, or a way to avoid real friends. I think of him as another life form, and if you are unable to do so, forget making a tulpa, it would be cruel to create a consciousness for the soul perpouse of abusing it.

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Allo. I'm turning 17 in a few months and I was in the exact same boat as you when I first started thinking about making a tulpa. What you SHOULD be taking into consideration is not physical age, but your mental health and ability to make positive choices while caring for your tulpa.

 

The mental health issue is self-explanatory but the choices you make will affect the trust between you. If I hadn't gone on as many hiatuses as I did, I'd be much closer to my tulpa than I am now (although we are still very very close). You want to treat your tulpa with care and respect for the sentient being it will become.

 

And most importantly, love your tulpa. Feeling indifferent to it is the worst mistake you can make. OuO

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I love it when people can make me see new perspectives, or at least old ones that I forget over time. Thank you all so much for the advice on both tulpa creation and life in general (though you may not have realized that last part). I needed to hear it I think.

 

Though I had hoped that specifying that I'm going to wait six months AND that I don't want sex at all would have everyone realize that I'm not out to hurt my creation, but as some did expect it I think that's a testimony to how awful humans are. Which isn't a surprise, but I had hoped that if they were willing to wait that long they wouldn't be so cruel . . . apparently not.

 

(Actually I'm more afraid of my tulpa being a psycho murderer/rapist than I am anything else tulpa-related, which is the other reason why I'm waiting so long: an attempt to expel that fear completely.)

 

Also -

 

Phaneron - *hi-five* I didn't expect any other amoebas to comment, but I'm so glad you did! Of course I realized that there was a chance that another asexual was on this site, but, ya know. Statistics and all that. XD

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Guest amber5885

Can I join in on the asexual high five?

 

Just wanted to comment that the odds of your tulpa being a psycho/murderer is extremely low. Odd are much higher that you will love one another :)

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I agree with what everyone already said about age and maturity and etc and I don't really have anything to add on that topic but I still want to comment on the psycho tulpa thing.

 

Most research agrees that psychopaths end up that way by a combination of genetic predisposition and childhood trauma that triggers that predisposition, it can be violent or negligent parents, sexual abuse, bullying, discrimination, etc, but the point is that every murderer/rapist/etc has previously been a victim.

 

Since tulpas develop like a person would and you aren't planning on abusing yours in any way then the is no chance of s/he ending up a psychopath.

 

Hope that helps assuage your fears at least a bit, of course you can wait as much as you think prudent and yes I do think that the fact you are willing to wait only to make sure that you are in the best state of mind possible to make your tulpa already says that you are going to be a great host :)

English isn't my first language and I'm not used to write in it but I'm always interested in learning, please tell me if I made a mistake or if you have any advice

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Asexual high fives all around! :D

 

Anyway, I do want to say my piece about psychotic or potentially evil tulpae. From my understanding and experience, tulpae tend not to be violent towards their host or anyone else for that matter unless seriously (seriously) provoked into doing so. I feel as if it's most likely against any given tupper's nature to go against their host or become homicidal or the like.

 

Sure, a tulpa can be taught to do these things, to be molded into being hateful, vicious, and violent. Then again, the likelihood of that happening to a tulpa that is being loved and created to be kind and good (or just not evil) is very close to nil. So I don't think that you have anything to worry about in that department.

[align=center]Even though my username is that of my tulpa, Quilten, my name is Phaneron, the host, who does all of the actual posting.

Tulpas: Quilten, Jira

[/align]

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Basically, if you don't do horrible unspeakable things to Tupperware you won't have to worry about them going awal on you. They can be a pain in the butt (by now I'm pretty sure it's in their nature) but even if they were evil they can't really posses or switch with you to take over. If by the one in a billion chance yours turns out evil, just, stop forcing. Simple as that. Ignore them till they're gone. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to sit in the lonely pansexual corner.

Edit: I just noticed I said Tupperware. I'm not fixing it just pointing it out.

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