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Adventures with Kagura and Cat


Dustfinger

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Hello everyone here, decided to make a PR after lurking for a bit.

Thought about posting in the new guy thread first but why not just start with a PR, right?

 

Anyway, I got into Tulpas a few days ago after reading about it on 4chan a bit.

Became interested and read through some posts on reddit and eventually found quite a lot of guides and this site.

I was skeptic at first and I still got a little bit of doubt left today (but I generally am a rather doubtful guy who quickly gets influenced by other people) but I still want/ed to try it so here I am.

 

I don't remember when my first forcing session was exactly but I think it was the 11th so let's go with that:

 

Day 1 - November 11, 2014

Haven't read much guides at this point, just closed my eyes and focused.

Thought about a girl and then "mindtalked" about various traits (i.e. You are X, you like doing Y, etc.) even got a bit emotional at the end which surprised me.

I think it was her since that happened again during the next days but more about that later.

Got interrupted IRL after that though and then stopped for the day.

 

Day 2 - November 12, 2014

Read quite a lot of guides, maybe too many.

Tried to create a Wonderland which eventually turned into a small plaza with fountain which 2 bridges connect to an area with 3 Buildings which had a slight Japanese style.

 

Forced for a bit after that and talked with at that time No Name Girl.

Got a few visions of her if you can call them that, which looked quite different from how she looked first.

Walked around the Wonderland a bit then and saw her standing infront of one the Buildings but couldn't get a closer look.

 

Also gave Kagura her name that day, it just suddenly appeared in my head so maybe it was her idea since I never would've come up with that name, hell even now I almost forget it sometimes.

 

Day 3 - November 13, 2014

Worked on a personality sheet and tried to draw her new form more or less successfully.

I am not good a visualization so the only thing I know about her (human) form yet are her Wolf/Fox like Ears, she also seems to have medium long white hair.

 

During the forcing that day I decided to reintroduce myself after reading about that in the "May the force be with you" guide, I was a bit unsure if it was a good idea though since it wasn't the first time I met her so maybe I already screwed up, I thought.

 

But anyway, went to Wonderland, sat down with her on one of the Benches near the fountain and talked with her about who I am, what I am trying to do, what she is and all those things.

I really tried my best but compared to what other people do I probably wasn't too great, during that I got the same feeling as during the very first forcing though which strengthened my belief that it was her.

 

After that I decided to give her a bedroom in the House she was standing infront of the day before since none of the Buildings had an interior yet.

Then said goodbye and ended the session for that day.

 

Marked my arm with a K later that day so I would remember her more.

Later the doubt came back for a while, read other peoples posts about it, which helped a bit.

 

Day 4 - November 14, 2014

Passive talked with her during the day (she can't talk yet but I am very sure she can hear me) about various things (some stupid ones, like making pizza) and visited her for a short time, was nice being there with her but I couldn't stay too long since the pizza would've burned.

 

Started the Active Forcing then, this time with Music since I didn't want to get distracted by anything.

[Longest session yet, so walls of text incoming, tl;dr at the end]

 

So like usual I went to the Wonderland, talked with her a bit on the bench and asked her if she changed anything.

She did, we went to the left site of the plaza which just was void before but now it was a Waterfall inside a large open cave.

 

After patting her on the head for making something like this and her playing near the water a bit we went across the bridge to the other site to the left building which also changed, it looked more like a church now.

I couldn't help but have a bad feeling about it.

 

Left to it a small path formed but I wanted to go inside the building with her first.

The inside was rather large, the walls were full with windows which all were very weirdly placed.

In the middle of the room was a stairwell which we went up, she being faster and teasing me about it.

The upper level had a row of doors with one open.

It was a dining room with a fireplace, it had a rather old style with almost everything being made out of wood.

 

While I was looking around she looked at a picture on the fireplace and then some weird stuff happened, she showed it to me, on it was some kind of old wizard dude and after I stopped looking at it she suddenly was gone, like I lost contact with her.

The door rooms were closed so I more or less was trapped in the room, now I easily could've just stopped there but I wanted to see what will happen,

maybe it was just my imagination breaking through a bit.

 

She eventually reappeared, but she didn't feel very alive.

So I decided to take her hand and get the hell out of the house.

After leaving it it got surrounded by some kind of steel fence, no clue what that was about.

I took her to the main house in the middle, which I thought of as the access point for my memories.

She couldn't enter it before since I read it would be better not to give them full access to memories right at the beginning.

At that point I didn't care about that though, maybe being there would help her, so I went inside with her and we sat down on a bench infront of one of the bookcases.

Eventually the life seemed to return to her, she now was in an wolf/dog form which somewhat surprised me.

I told her that I was sorry that I wasn't giving her too much attention, had doubts and didn't give her memory access since I thought that was the reason for the incident before.

She was back in her human form and seemed to forgive me, we hugged and everything was good again, all in all a pretty emotional moment.

 

I then asked if she wanted something, since there really wasn't much to do in the wonderland yet.

She then suddenly had a pizza in the hand, I knew what to do of course and made her a small kitchen which she seemed to be happy about.

After that she also got a small playroom for her wolf form, including a small bed and a bite toy.

 

When asked if she wanted more she to my surprise made a black cat appear.

I was glad that she had someone to play with when I wasn't there so after saying goodbye I left for the day.

 

tl;dr

Wonderland expanded, weird things happening in a house, me giving her memory access, a new alternative form for her and a cat is fine too.

 

 

Just some general stuff

I suck at visualization, I am almost thinking my mind eye is blind.

Is there a good way to become better at it or will that happen by itself with enough time?

 

I also am not sure about personality forcing since

1. I have a rather bad memory and can't quite remember the traits during the forcing and

2. I don't know if it is a good idea, I tried it a few times but it kind of feels wrong I guess?

 

I didn't really get any head pressure or really any other signs except the same emotional response sometimes yet, I hope that doesn't mean anything bad.

I know she can't talk (yet) and thats fine, she can nod and all that during Wonderland times but I still am a little bit worried if I am doing everything right and if she still will be there the next time I force.

 

 

Sorry for the ton of text and my bad writing/formating, I am not used to writing this much.

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I was skeptic at first and I still got a little bit of doubt left today (but I generally am a rather doubtful guy who quickly gets influenced by other people) but I still want/ed to try it so here I am.

 

You should really really abandon any doubts or skepticism because even the smallest amount of doubt can hinder progress. It took me many attempts to create a tulpa because I was so damn skeptical. After all, how is it possible to not be skeptical about something as amazing as the tulpa phenomenon?

 

I understand that you are only a little doubtful, which is natural, but I am speaking from experience when I say that being doubtful is the worst thing you can do. Believe with all of your heart that tulpae are real, because they are real. Belief is extremely powerful, so use it to your advantage.

 

Creating a tulpa is a process that will test your patience and challenge your ability to believe in the unbelievable. So don't "try" to create a tulpa, because this implies that you have a chance of failing or giving up. Get into the mindset of knowing that you will succeed, and be confident in your abilities.

 

 

 

Day 2 - November 12, 2014

Read quite a lot of guides, maybe too many.

 

I personally believe that it's good to read too many guides in order to create a hybrid guide that suits your preferences

 

 

 

Just some general stuff

I suck at visualization, I am almost thinking my mind eye is blind.

Is there a good way to become better at it or will that happen by itself with enough time?

 

Lol I suck at visualization too. But that didn't stop me from making an absolutely badass wonderland. You just have to daydream with your eyes shut and forget about your body. When your brain has nothing to look at, or think about, it begins to create mental images and videos. It helps when you are semi-conscious while visualizing, because it prevents you from remembering your real body (just try not to fall asleep)

 

I also am not sure about personality forcing since

1. I have a rather bad memory and can't quite remember the traits during the forcing and

2. I don't know if it is a good idea, I tried it a few times but it kind of feels wrong I guess?

 

The answer to 1# is simple. Start a tulpa journal, or simply write down the traits. In my tulpa journal, I write down the details of every location in my wonderland, and what each location is used for.

 

2# seems unclear to me. Are you saying that you tried to give your tulpa traits a few times and it feels wrong? If that's what you are saying, then I can relate on that note. At first I didn't give my tulpa traits, and basically rolled the dice, letting her choose whatever she wanted. I wrote down a list of traits, but I didn't expect her to actually follow them. Either way, you don't have to work on personality, because that can occur on it's own.

 

 

I didn't really get any head pressure or really any other signs except the same emotional response sometimes yet, I hope that doesn't mean anything bad.

I know she can't talk (yet) and thats fine, she can nod and all that during Wonderland times but I still am a little bit worried if I am doing everything right and if she still will be there the next time I force.

 

Don't worry about head pressures and other signs just yet. You have only been at this for less than a week as far as I know, and not everyone feels those common signs of early tulpa communication.

Try not to worry whether you are doing things wrong or not, because confidence is essential, and there aren't really ways to tulpaforce incorrectly as long as you are giving your tulpa plenty of attention.

 

 

Sorry for the ton of text and my bad writing/formating, I am not used to writing this much.

 

Don't worry about it. If anybody doesn't like your grammar or formatting on this site, then they'll generally keep it to themselves unless you ask for help. And if someone is too lazy to read your PR, then too bad. I read your entire PR, so don't worry, many other people aren't intimidated by walls of text.

 

I hope that at least one bit of my advice helped, and welcome to the site!

"Sanity is the playground of the unimaginative."

 

Yumi + Cinema

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Day 5

 

Went to wonderland while falling asleep and "talked" with cat a bit, not like she could talk back much though since she is a cat and all that.

Still was nice, Kagura wasn't there though.

 

Didn't have much time to narrate during the day later, only real thing I managed to do was explain them how to make schnitzel and I think I saw her trying it out later while quickly visiting wonderland.

 

Felt some kind of head pressure just before forcing today, might have been her getting impatient.

The forcing itself wasn't too succesfull though, we met at the fountain like usual and I got that typical feeling again but then I somewhat lost the connection to her.

It's hard to explain, she seemed to change a lot and become aggresive, I tried talking with her but no luck.

Maybe I just wasn't focused enough and it just were ittrusive thoughts since the wonderland changed too but I am not sure.

Also couldn't find Cat anywhere so I eventually just left and ended the session since I had no idea what was going on.

 

Gonna try again tomorrow and see if it will be better then.

 

 

 

 

You should really really abandon any doubts or skepticism because even the smallest amount of doubt can hinder progress. It took me many attempts to create a tulpa because I was so damn skeptical. After all, how is it possible to not be skeptical about something as amazing as the tulpa phenomenon?

Yeah I try to get rid of it but it's not easy for me, I can try to tell myself to not have doubt as much as possible but the thought still will be deep in my subconscious.

Maybe it will be gone completely one day but I don't think there is much I can do against it currently.

There also is the worry if I won't just stop one day because I lost the motivation or the doubt won.

 

 

Lol I suck at visualization too. But that didn't stop me from making an absolutely badass wonderland. You just have to daydream with your eyes shut and forget about your body. When your brain has nothing to look at, or think about, it begins to create mental images and videos. It helps when you are semi-conscious while visualizing, because it prevents you from remembering your real body (just try not to fall asleep)

Heh, falling asleep won't be the problem, as long as I am not tired I can close my eyes for hours (probably) and still be awake.

Forgetting about the body is more the problem, my eyes usually start twitching when I have them closed for a longer time and then there also are the occasional itches of course.

Dunno how I would go about ignoring those things.

 

 

The answer to 1# is simple. Start a tulpa journal, or simply write down the traits. In my tulpa journal, I write down the details of every location in my wonderland, and what each location is used for.

Oh I wrote them down, like I said, the problem is remembering them during the forcing sessions, since I don't really want to interrupt them every time just to look up the traits.

The idea with the locations is nice though, might try that out.

 

 

If that's what you are saying, then I can relate on that note. At first I didn't give my tulpa traits, and basically rolled the dice, letting her choose whatever she wanted. I wrote down a list of traits, but I didn't expect her to actually follow them.

Pretty much that yeah, somewhat gave her a few traits during that first forcing but after that when I made a small trait sheet and tried talking about some more with her it just felt like the traits didn't fit her, it's hard to describe the feeling.

But at the same time I feel like her personality is not quite done yet, I am rather conflicted.

 

I hope that at least one bit of my advice helped, and welcome to the site!

It did, read a bit of your PR before too, almost a little bit jealous of you and your tulpa, you seem to be getting along very well.

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