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Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?
OCDHost Offline
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#1
 
Sad  Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

Hi, I'm new here and English isn't my first language so if anything sounds funny tell me and I'll try to explain it better.

I learned about tulpas a year or 2 ago but just yesterday decided to try it and started tulpa forcing today, I have this wonderland that is a house with a big big garden, I visualized my tulpa as a white kitty and started talking with her, I carried her and showed her the house, everything was good until I put her on kitchen floor and had this intrusive thought about stepping on her and crushing her, and it was horrible and I felt really bad about it so I carried her again and told her I was very sorry and that I didn't mean to think about it but I have OCD and can't help it sometimes.

I feel horrible about it and I'm really worried that this intrusive thoughts may hurt my tulpa, that she may think that I want to hurt her when that's totally the opposite of my intentions, the thought doesn't come with any "bad energy" or intention, it's like a visualization that flashes on my mind for a second and then it goes away, well today like I said I got really stressed about it and that just made my brain started repeating the thought a few times more until I calmed myself down.

For those that not know violent or sexual intrusive thoughts are really common in people with Obssessive Compulsive Dissorder (they are the Obssessive part), I have been in treatment for many 7 years already and my OCD is almost completely in check, it's only triggered when I'm anxious and I take it as my natural response in that kind of situation, I felt so bad this time not because of the thoughts in itself but because I'm really afraid my tulpa may be hurt because of them, I really mean no harm, I can't even explain how guilty I felt about it, could she have thought that I want to harm her? Or that I'm dangerous? Should I stop trying to tulpa force? Or does she understand? There weren't any malicious energy or intent in the thoughts so maybe she gets that? Could I explain it to her? I don't know...

Interaction with tulpas is about visualization more than anything so are this thoughts like really hitting her? IRL nothing happens if I imagine harming someone in meatspace, I can just ignore the thought and it goes away, no one is hurt, I don't know if I can say the same in this circumstances.
06-10-2014, 07:31 PM
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#2
 
RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

I interpret tulpas to be based on belief. You believe them to be a certain thing, and they will conform to it (within limits). And as long as you believe that every stray thought will hurt your tulpa, they won't.
(06-10-2014, 07:31 PM)OCDHost Wrote: Could she have thought that I want to harm her? Or that I'm dangerous?
Probably not, since you've been paying so much attention to her and being a good host.
Quote: Should I stop trying to tulpa force?
Hell no! Don't let a couple of bad thoughts ruin what can be a great experience.
Quote:Could I explain it to her? I don't know...
I don't see in any harm in doing so, just be sure to set up some sort of agreement or understanding that you aren't responsible behind every stray thought.
Quote:
in meatspace
Is this really a good replacement for the term wonderland?
06-10-2014, 07:51 PM
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AttackDoughnut Offline
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#3
 
RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

Oh, don't worry about it! I know the feeling. I sometimes have... less than decent thoughts about Amy. It's not something I have control over, and it's not something I want happening.

The thing is though, your tulpa knows you don't want to hurt her. You feel genuinely bad about thinking these things, and she realizes that. It'll be something that happens, but your tulpa loves you, and so long as you believe that it won't affect her negatively, it won't.

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06-10-2014, 07:54 PM
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OCDHost Offline
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#4
 
RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

Thanks a lot for your replies, I really appreciate it, I feel better now, I didn't want to have to stop since the little time I spent with her was really relaxing even though it was only the first day Smile

(06-10-2014, 07:51 PM)Jimmy Wrote: Is this really a good replacement for the term wonderland?

Oh, it's not a replacemente for wonderland, it's a replacement for "real world", like in not online or wonderland, I don't like the word too much but it's what my friends (and many people online) use and I like saying "real world" even less (it implies that everything you do online or in wonderland isn't "real" and is therefore less valuable/important).
06-10-2014, 08:12 PM
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SakuraSky Offline
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#5
 
RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

I have OCD too, and I think my Tulpa understands the intrusive thoughts. I've explained it to her, and I think she understands, my memories may help her as well. I've heard others say that sometimes tulpas can eventually help with the intrusive thoughts and push them away. I'm too new to know much about that though (just something I've read a few times)

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06-10-2014, 08:49 PM
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fennecgirl Offline
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#6
 
RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

I get intrusive thoughts a lot as well. There's no risk of intrusive thoughts harming your tulpa unless you honestly believe they will. My tulpae aren't even aware of my intrusive thoughts.


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06-11-2014, 04:16 PM
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Butterologist Offline
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RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

(06-11-2014, 04:16 PM)fennecgirl Wrote: I get intrusive thoughts a lot as well. There's no risk of intrusive thoughts harming your tulpa unless you honestly believe they will. My tulpae aren't even aware of my intrusive thoughts.
This^

Simply believe they won't be harmed/can't see what's happening, and they won't be offended, hurt...etc
06-11-2014, 08:04 PM
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Linkzelda Offline
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RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

What if we're just believing they can't see what's happening to give us the assurance that it's perfectly alright? Self-fulfilling prophecies can be a crazy thing, you know. Kind of like how everyone's been stating that as long as you don't attach yourself into believing, and behaving in a way to be consistent with those beliefs, it probably won't happen.

Think about it this way; You can have all sorts of intrusive thoughts that may concern you, but they don't have to reflect on who you are in general. For instance, if you're getting some random thought that you're the most pathetic spaghetti eater in the world, then it's only going to be a problem if you really want to let that transient thought linger on. It's about being a passive observer of those thoughts, and knowing the thoughts don't suddenly change who you are in general, because you don't let them do so.

If you want to believe your tulpa can have similar competencies with intrusive thoughts, especially if they're implied as going through the confines of your mind for all sorts of things, you'd think they can easily assess sporadic thinking like it was nothing. But hey, guess everyone's different in their self-fulfilling prophecies.


(This post was last modified: 06-12-2014, 12:38 AM by Linkzelda.)
06-12-2014, 12:34 AM
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OCDHost Offline
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RE: Can intrusive thoughts/visualisations harm a tulpa?

(06-12-2014, 12:34 AM)Linkzelda Wrote: What if we're just believing they can't see what's happening to give us the assurance that it's perfectly alright? Self-fulfilling prophecies can be a crazy thing, you know. Kind of like how everyone's been stating that as long as you don't attach yourself into believing, and behaving in a way to be consistent with those beliefs, it probably won't happen.

Think about it this way; You can have all sorts of intrusive thoughts that may concern you, but they don't have to reflect on who you are in general. For instance, if you're getting some random thought that you're the most pathetic spaghetti eater in the world, then it's only going to be a problem if you really want to let that transient thought linger on. It's about being a passive observer of those thoughts, and knowing the thoughts don't suddenly change who you are in general, because you don't let them do so.

If you want to believe your tulpa can have similar competencies with intrusive thoughts, especially if they're implied as going through the confines of your mind for all sorts of things, you'd think they can easily assess sporadic thinking like it was nothing. But hey, guess everyone's different in their self-fulfilling prophecies.

I don't care much if she can or can't see these thoughts, nor do I worry about what they say about myself (that is nothing, they are a symptom of my OCD, at least the ones that I'm referring to in this thread), my worry was more about if being exposed to them would be negative in anyway to my tulpa, if I had an already developed tulpa I wouldn't worry about it neither since I would assume she can understand the thoughts for what they are, but I just started working on her yesterday and I didn't know if she could, I think my mistake was seeing the tulpa as I child that doesn't understand anything about their world when it seems this isn't the case, even if a tulpa doesn't know how to speak at first (although I know some say the problem is the host can't hear them) this doesn't mean they have mental abilities analogous to like what a human baby/infant would have (particularly having in mind that she may not even be sentient now even though I do treat her like she is), I realize now this was a stupid mistake to make and that I let myself get carried away by anxiety.

Thank you all for your words, I really needed someone to tell me it was okay so I would be able to calm down, like I said I'm new at this and I guess no matter how much theory you read it is different once you start and get to experience things yourself, I'm trying to take a more levelheaded approach to forcing in general, and I did learn a lot from this incident, things were good while I was forcing today and I expect they can only get better Smile
06-12-2014, 01:35 AM
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