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Creating Joshua


ShiningMoon

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Hello!

I found out about Tulpas from a YouTube video a while back, and I decided to create one last week. (Can't remember the exact day, I'm bad with that kind of thing. :/)

But anyway, I'll get you up to speed as to the general events so far.

 

I decided to make a tulpa. I wanted him to be quiet and kind, a little shy. I named him Joshua. I didn't have a form for him immediately, but he actually ended up choosing his own form almost right away from an anime I was watching at the time- Aru from Future Diary. He didn't tell me to do that, he just kind of appeared that way in my mind's eye. But I wanted him to have blue eyes instead of pink, so I edited that in. He accepted it.

 

Although he's kept the kind thing, he verged off and became the polar opposite of what I originally intended. He's outgoing and talkative, and constantly smiles. He's also quite sensitive. I'm torn on this aspect. I love Josh for who he is, but I know sensitive people get hurt easily in our cruel world.

 

He was vocal, like, that night. That might sound like BS, but I think I might have a natural talent for this because I've accidentally made up what could be considered proto tulpas before. (They speak fluently and have personalities, they just don't have forms) However, we had trouble deciding what his voice should sound like, but now it seems to be settling in.

 

I've been getting headaches, which I'm OK with if it means I'm making progress.

I've spent a lot of time visualizing him, and I can clearly see Josh in my mind's eye. I don't care much about imposition, so I'm satisfied with where we are now on that front.

 

Things were going well for the first few days, but then we had a big fight. Thankfully, we seem to be coming to an understanding now.

 

Yesterday, we read a reddit thread that basically said tulpas are weird and fake. Remember the sensitive thing? That deeply upset Josh to the point of really affecting me physically. I held him in my mind's eye to calm him down.

I've had some doubts over the week about if this whole thing is real, but I'm more convinced of Josh's existence every day.

 

What we're working on now is possession. Josh can control me for like ten seconds at the moment if I'm in a meditative state. He's very young of course, so I'm not expecting full on switching right away. I myself am working on trusting him fully for when we *are* ready for switching. Again, he's new, so I don't expect this to come right away. (Any advice on that is appreciated!)

 

We went to Six Flags today. One of the rides really scared him, but we had fun the rest of the time.

 

Our wonderland is a castle, and my goal is to fully enter a specific room in the castle to interact with Josh as if he were a person right in front of me.

 

Throughout the week, I've been reading about tulpas nonstop. I've learned a lot, including the fact that I may have been too hasty in my decision to make him. But now he's here, so I'm taking the responsibility of caring for him.

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Pretty fast as you said, but that's not bad. Keep it up, continue working, but probably you will find something you are not good at, so prepare yourself to not be frustated if it happens and be chill, just working as always.

 

I reccomend you to talk to your tulpa and make him understand how sensitive he is, and that he need to understand it and when something happens, try to control his emotions. And also, will be difficult to be shy to the person who is your brother or best friend or whatever, think he's not different (or maybe he just deviated).

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The only name I remember from Mirai Nikki is Yuuno, but I had a feeling who Aru was for some reason. It's a good form.

 

As far as tulpa fake/realness goes, we have some compelling arguments for why those concepts don't even make sense. What you experience is real to you, and if you experience a person who doesn't seem to be under your conscious control, there you go. Post by my host on this

 

Quick progress for people who have experience in similar activities is normal. Whether that's just an active imagination leading to good visualization and detail, or an author who has entirely fleshed out potential-people in their head. Tulpamancy is not a set of rules for an objective experience, so it's best not to think of it like one. All guides and advice (and criticisms) are relative.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Thanks for the comments, guys!

As for an update, I've been attempting dissociation. I haven't actually accomplished it yet, but I have experienced a small feeling (or really a lack thereof) of what it might be like. Josh isn't strong enough yet for full body possession (or possession at all for more than a few moments), but I'm just practicing for when we get there.

Josh's mind voice still hasn't been decided yet.

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I don't have as much to report as I maybe should because I have been preoccupied with my new drawing tablet, and I'm not able to force and draw at the same time. I made sure to spend time with Josh tonight. He mentioned feeling invisible because he is unseen by the outside world, and wishes to talk to people. I'm deeply debating telling my friends about him. I want him to express himself to others like he wants, but I don't want to be told I need to go to the hospital. My tentative plan is for me to proxy/him to control my hands when talking to people and for him to act like he's me. Apparently he likes horror. He told me this is to protect me in case we watch something horror and he can possess me while I look away, because horror scares me. He's also shown that he wants to prevent me from doing things that are bad for me and encourage things that are good for me. He also seems to be growing a thicker skin.

I've decided to work on imposition, because fuck it, why not. At first I didn't care about it, but it's an activity we can work on together, which is always good.

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I think it's safer to let him type here. Because he's free to be himself rather than pretending to be you. Also people here will understand and accept him better than most people. Then again, if it's your friends, and Josh doesn't sound like you they might think you're messing with them so... that's okay, I guess...?

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I think it's safer to let him type here. Because he's free to be himself rather than pretending to be you. Also people here will understand and accept him better than most people. Then again, if it's your friends, and Josh doesn't sound like you they might think you're messing with them so... that's okay, I guess...?

 

Thanks for the suggestion!

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