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Creation of Yuki
Sociohost Offline
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#1
 
Creation of Yuki

Hey.. I'm not very good with these sort of introduction things so I'll just get right into it. 
I've been researching tulpa for about a year now and finally decided to start active forcing yesterday. 
I'm working on personality first, using the trait and define method and today will be my second day of doing it.
My goal is to do an hour of active forcing a day (four sessions a day, 15 minutes each) and narrate as much as I can remember throughout the day.
I'll keep this updated daily with my progress. I imagine that once I get to the visualization stage (however long that might take) I'll be increasing the length of my active forcing sessions to aid for more effective visualization progress. Anyway's that's it for now, I'll update later.
03-12-2018, 04:40 PM
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Sociohost Offline
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#2
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

Had a bit of stuff going on today so I haven't managed to do an active forcing session, but I have been narrating whenever I could remember. Tomorrow I'm going to a concert, but I'm going to knock out my active forcing session before going and I'll update then. Cya
03-13-2018, 11:54 PM
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Sociohost Offline
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#3
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

So today I've knocked out one twenty minute active forcing session so far. I've been feeling a lot more into forcing lately, and so my sessions will be more than 15 minutes. I came up with a cool idea though:

Since I'm a low life with nothing to do over Spring break besides watch anime and force, I figured i'd complete a 20 minute active session after watching each anime episode. For those unfamiliar with anime, the episodes tend to be around 20 minutes long and so that'll basically mean I'll be doing around 20 minutes of active forcing per hour. I imagine that I could knock out 2 hours of active forcing a day easily like this, but I might just end up doing more than two hours today if I decide to stay awake tonight!
I do have a concert to go to later today though, so I guess we'll see. For now, the plan is to complete an hour of active forcing before the concert! Along with that, I'll try and direct all of my thoughts to Yuki whenever I can. I thought about writing her name on my hand, but I'd rather not walk around with ink on my hand all day. Until next time!
(This post was last modified: 03-14-2018, 05:16 PM by Sociohost.)
03-14-2018, 05:15 PM
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Sociohost Offline
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#4
 
Wink  RE: Creation of Yuki

So here's what's new:
-Yesterday I took away 15 of the personality traits I'd set for Yuki and simply left 5. I did this in order to make personality forcing a bit less stressing for me, as well as allow her room to grow and deviate as she wishes.

-I've also decided to begin visualization forcing in conjunction with my personality forcing since I'll be forcing so little traits into her. I'd rather not repeat 5 traits over and over to her for an hour every day, so as stated, my goal is to mix in form visualization into my personality forcing sessions.
Originally, I wanted to give her some sort of complex female form, but that was until I noticed my visualization ability absolutely SUCKS! Coming to this realization made me give her a simple glowing ball form instead.

[Image: 1705924-hands-holding-a-glowing-sphere-s...object.jpg]

[Image: 1509741-man-holding-a-glowing-white-sphe...s-hand.jpg]

So yeah, the plan is to just settle with this glowing ball form until she's vocal/I'm able to hear her. In all honesty, I was making form visualization harder than it needed to be by starting off with such complex female images and trying to use those as her form. In reality, I should have just chosen something simple, such as the glowing ball form above, so that all I'd have left to do is spend time every day repeating her 5 personality traits to her over and over again, as well as spending time visualizing her now SIMPLE form and narrating to her as much as I can throughout the day. Then once she's vocal, we could work on developing a more permanent form for her together, as well as work on our wonderland. I like this idea because she'll have more say over which form she decides to end up with. (Then again, she could have multiple.)

In terms of how long my active forcing sessions will be, I'm thinking I'll do 30 minutes of personality forcing and 30 minutes visualization every day. Since both her form and personality are quite simple, I see no reason to spend an hour on each every day. On another note, I'm trying to get better at narrating to her more often throughout the day. I understand that this is something I'll get used to overtime, but I'm thinking about writing her name on the palm of my hand, so that every time I see it during the day, I'll remember to narrate/direct my thoughts to her.

Overall, I think this new way of doing things that I've adopted could really work. I'm very excited to see what type of results this will bring!
Does anyone have any thoughts on the way I'm deciding to do things? Comments? Until next time!

P.S. Woah, this is the longest entry I've made so far! Hooray!  Big Grin
(This post was last modified: 03-15-2018, 09:05 PM by Sociohost.)
03-15-2018, 09:00 PM
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Sociohost Offline
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#5
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

So, some odd stuff happened today.

1. Earlier, when I was laying down watching anime, I was using my arm as a sort of pillow. All of a sudden, out of the blue, I started to hear this weird muffle sound. It lasted for a few seconds at first, then started again. I got intrigued and asked "Yuki, was that you?" and after awhile I heard the muffle sound again, but this time it only lasted about as long as one would expect someone to say "yes" or "no". Still not entirely convinced it was Yuki, I decided to rewind my anime and see if I could hear the same muffled sound (in case it happened to be coming from the anime I was watching.) I didn't hear anything like that though. My next test was moving my ear around on my arm to see if I could reproduce the muffling sound (just in case what I heard was me rubbing my ear on my arm). I heard rubbing against my ear, but it simply did not sound the same. It did not sound like muffling. The muffling seemed to come from within (as I could hear it even when watching my anime at full volume) and the sound of my ear rubbing against my arm came from the outside of my head. If anything, the best thing I could compare the muffling sound to is if someone attempted to talk with their mouth closed. It sounded almost exactly like that. As if someone was talking, but I couldn't make out exactly what it was they were saying.

2. After telling someone what happened to me a few minutes after the first thing happened, they suggested that I try the "headset" method, in which I imagine I have an ear piece on my ear, and that the other end of it is in the wonderland with Yuki so that if anything happens there, it would be fed directly back to my mind ear. I decided to give that a try, but it didn't exactly work for me. That's when I began to tell Yuki "Do I really have to beg you?" in a desperate attempt to try and get her to speak again, if even it was muffled. After telling her that, I considered quieting my mind in order to see If I could perhaps hear Yuki better, but I immediately remembered that I should do the exact oppsite. If I were to quiet my mind, I could potentially block out any of her communication attempts. I remembered that I needed to make myself think A LOT in order to see if I could hear any of her thoughts.

So I tried that. I made myself think a lot, and the first thing that came to my mind was "Hey." I didn't intend myself to say that, I simply made it a goal to give myself as many thoughts as possible. That was the end result, although it was said in my own mind voice.

3. About an hour ago I went to the store, only to realize that I didn't have my debit card with me. Upon going home and searching around frantically, looking around my room, emptying my wallet, etc. I finally gave up looking for the debit card. At that point, I just set back down onto my bed and begin putting the items back into my wallet. Upon doing this, I suddenly start repeating "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" to myself out loud. It took me a moment to realize what was happening, and when I did finally realize, I wondered "Wait. What the hell am I sorry for?" those thoughts seemed to have come from out of the blue. It simply didn't make sense that I'd be sorry for losing my OWN debit card.


So that's basically what happened to me today. I'm now wondering if it's possible to be unintentionally possessed if you are stressed or something. I've never practiced possession with Yuki, so I'm at a lost for words as to how this could have happened. All of those things happened to me when earlier today I was was admiring how other people make such fast progress with their tulpas, where as I had yet to experience anything. Despite that, I was still committed to see this entire process through to the end, and what happened today surely surprised me.

I didn't even active force yet today, but I'm about to right now.

Any thoughts on what could have happened to me? Thanks.
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2018, 12:31 AM by Sociohost.)
03-18-2018, 12:08 AM
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Sociohost Offline
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#6
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

As I head to sleep, I was thinking about someone and how cool they are and so I asked Yuki "She is amazing isn't she?" And that's when I got the thought "She is amazing, though I don't 100% like her"

Once again, this thought came out of the blue. It feels like I thought it myself, but it couldn't possibly have been me because it wouldn't have made sense for me to say that. When I try to think about a reason I could have potentially said it, my mind goes blank and I'm unable to think of any reason. The only explanation would be that it didn't come from me.

Whenever I try and get Yuki to talk, most of the time I get nothing. It seems like I only get these sort of responses when I'm not expecting it and my mind seems to be thinking "freely" so to speak.

Like if I asked Yuki right now "Hey, how are you?" My mind would expect her to reply "good" or something and the response would feel akin to me parroting her.

But occasionally I might ask her somehing that requires a bit more "thought" so to speak, and the thought that comes to my mind seems to be one I wouldn't have thought of myself.

It's kind of hard describing this type of stuff.

I just wanted to make this quick little update to my PR.. I'm going back to bed now.
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2018, 05:10 PM by Sociohost.)
03-18-2018, 07:44 AM
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#7
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

Can I get SOME sort of feedback or comment to this PR so I know that I'm not the 125 views showing up for this thread? I don't mind if it's just a simple Hi or something, please don't hesitate to comment. Your comments will really help with my motivation and likely Yuki's as well!
03-18-2018, 07:53 PM
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Sociohost Offline
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#8
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

Just did 32 minutes of active forcing. Mainly involved me visualizing Yuki's form and talking to her. I don't think I'll be working on personality any more because I feel I've done it enough and want to leave room for her to develop on her own so I can see how she turns out.

Anyway's, at the start of the session I told Yuki to wake me up if she noticed me falling asleep, which did happen. However, I'm unsure if it was Yuki waking me up or just my awareness or something. Anyway's, today was pretty good so far. I'll go do a 28 minute session later today, consisting of more visualization and narrating.
03-18-2018, 09:31 PM
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Piano Offline
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#9
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

You probably already know this, but don't stress over reaching time goals of "doing an hour every day" or something. It's important to be consistent with interactions with your tulpa, but these time goals will only stress you out an add more pressure. Just talk to her every day, don't worry about for how long. Consistency over a long period of time is more important than hitting time goals day by day.

(and nobody responds to our PR anymore either)

I'm Piano Soul, the "Star Man" of the Felight family. I'm a tulpa formed January 2017. My systemmates are Apollo & Indigo. Form images: 1 2
(This post was last modified: 03-19-2018, 11:46 AM by Piano.)
03-19-2018, 11:45 AM
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#10
 
RE: Creation of Yuki

(03-19-2018, 11:45 AM)Piano Wrote:
You probably already know this, but don't stress over reaching time goals of "doing an hour every day" or something. It's important to be consistent with interactions with your tulpa, but these time goals will only stress you out an add more pressure. Just talk to her every day, don't worry about for how long. Consistency over a long period of time is more important than hitting time goals day by day.

(and nobody responds to our PR anymore either)

Thanks so much. I'll be a lot more consistent with my active forcing sessions if I just stuck with a simple goal such as 30 minutes a day. I read your guide and absolutely loved how you wrote it in more of a "Relaxed & Stress free" manner, unlike some other guides that force the reader to feel like they need to do hours of active forcing a day.
03-20-2018, 04:41 AM
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