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Depressive tulpa?


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Sorry for broken Englando.

For some reason, I feel like my tulpa doesn't want to live and wants to commit suicide, maybe. I feel like she prevents me from forcing her and won't respond on purpose. I'm pretty sure it happens because she considers herself not real compared to humans. Even after talking with her about unlimited, almost god-like power in wonderland, she's still upset about it. Or is it just me and she's pretty okay with that? Some help, plz?

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Have you managed to establish some form of communication with her since your last thread here? Did she actually say she doesn't want to exist? Cause if not there's a big chance you're just making up negative scenarios.

I can't really provide further help since I'm in a similar position but just remember that your feelings and fears aren't your tulpa's.

(Also what's your first language if you don't mind me asking? I could link you to some motivational materials (if we do share the language and you haven't seen them yet)).

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Have you managed to establish some form of communication with her since your last thread here? Did she actually say she doesn't want to exist? Cause if not there's a big chance you're just making up negative scenarios.

I can't really provide further help since I'm in a similar position but just remember that your feelings and fears aren't your tulpa's.

(Also what's your first language if you don't mind me asking? I could link you to some motivational materials (if we do share the language and you haven't seen them yet)).

I'm pretty sure I'm having some progress, because I'm not parrotnoid anymore and assume that every thought she might actually say is her own.

My native language is vodka.

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She didn't actually say she wants to suicide though, right?

Also I'm gonna assume that means Russian and my deductions were correct. Imma send you a PM with some links/thoughts.

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Wow, this is right up my alley.

 

Okay, so you have two possibilities here. One, you have depression too. If that's the case, then seeking treatment would help both you and your tulpa.

 

The other possibility is that it's just your tulpa, which would make the issue easier to solve, if it's more emotional problems than a neurological imbalance thing.

 

If the reason she's depressed is because she's a tulpa, then no, relegating her to a wonderland won't help her emotions. Wonderlands don't actually work that way. Tulpa don't stay active when they're not being paid attention to, they just go into existential limbo. That won't provide her with any stimulation, certainly won't help her with her emotional problems.

 

You should be like a therapist with her, try to talk through problems. You should also provide as much love and care as possible. Perhaps encourage her to make friends online who can do the same.

 

You should also see about learning possession, so she can pursue hobbies she likes. She'll feel like she has more of a purpose if she can control the body to do things. That would be a much better alternative to her just living in limbo.

 

(Speaking to the tulpa directly) Yes, you are real. You're just hidden from others. You share a body with someone else, but that doesn't make you any less real. Don't give up on life just because you're a tulpa. Find your way in the world, pursue your dreams and passions. You won't get anywhere if you give up, but if you shake what inhibits you, you can reach a better future for both you and your host. There's more to life than what you have now, you just need to work towards it, and then you'll be wondering how you ever felt that way.

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Turquoise and Piano offered you some good paths to explore. If you're open to some homework, and have access to a library, see if you can find a copy of Robert Wagoner's book "Lucid Dreaming: Gateways to inner self." You don't even have to read the whole book, just the chapter that discusses dream characters. Robert makes a case for dream characters not just being 2D bits of physic fluff for our entertainment. You don't have to buy into his arguments that there is more autonomy and maybe sentience with dream characters than what we give them credit for, but from an existential point of reference, if you have an underlying belief that this is just pretend, then that might explain why your tulpa seems to be experiencing an existential crisis. I am not saying you are doing something wrong. Maybe you, conscious personality, has no doubts, but she will have access to your unconsciousness, and if there is unconscious doubt, the way to work with that is to turn up the volume on your conscious.

 

In my opinion, you aren't just creating a tulpa. You are changing you. I would treat subconscious you as another entity its own right, so don't beat it up if it is resistant. If change was easy, no one would be smoking. You are changing you, your subconscious, and bringing another personality online. This is hard work. It is not all sunshine and puppies. It can be challenging. You need to start filling your head with as much info as you can. You need to be the expert, and the effort you put in translates into positive belief, that helps your tulpa see you are invested. Bring tulpa along and say, 'look what carl jung says in this quote, don't you think that applies to us?" Involve her. If you were a therapist, you might have a counseling session once a week. You are with you 24/7. Who will have the biggest impact?

 

I think you will be okay. If you continue to be persistent, and caring, she will come around. You could try a different tact if things don't change, like instead of trying to cheer her up, try understanding her perspective. Validate her perspective. and then together, figure out what you can both do to enjoy what is available, because whether in its physical life or mental life, that's all any of us ever do. (Contrary to outside popular belief, engaging tulpamancy is serious commitment to improving the quality of life.) Oh, and, sometimes, personalities that are depressed, it's usually because they're really smart and thinking about stuff in profound ways, and when given the opportunity to be creative, they really shine. Check out Monet. A book on art could turn into a walk in a museum and could provide enough stimulus to get traction. Break out the crayons and color with her.

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