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Dran0r0 and Nova's diary


Dran0r0

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Hello everyone !

 

I began working on a tulpa a few days ago and I think that having a thread/blog about it could help me, so here am I.

 

What did I do 'till now : I've made a wonderland. It's a clearing in the middle of a hudge forest. In the center of the clearing, there is a hudge lake with dark-blue water. If you look at the horizon you can see a mountain with snow on the top.

 

After creating my wonderland I began to talk to Nova, my tulpa. I saw here like a little blue ball of "energy". At first I had planed to do personality as suggested in FAQ_man's guide but, despite having prepared personality traits, I just couldn't do it, the descriptions of character and emotion never made much sense to me.

 

So I began narrating during ~30 min before sleeping and sometimes during the day. I also began visualization (I want her to look like a female human).

 

Now we come to things who are bothering me :

  • My tulpa said two or three things and, when I was vizualising her naked, suddenly appeared to me covering her private. Because I'm in the very beginning of the creation process, I higly doubt that the cause of these actions isn't me parrotting. I try not to do it but, sometime, I do it so fast that I don't even realise it. So one of my objectives is to have a better control of myself.
  • I don't know if I should build her a house in my wonderland. Does tulpa usualy like having imaginary house ?

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A tulpa doesn't even need a wonderland. The wonderland is for you. Do you really think you'll just create a world and they will stay in it until you come back? Pffft, they aren't limited to anything as human as that.

 

As for the parroting problem, it's not parroting, but I highly highly highly doubt it's sentience. It's probably your automatic reaction to think that if anyone was naked they would do what she did. It's like if you imagined a speeding car heading towards a tree, it would probably smash off it, as you would expect.

 

When you think she said two or three things, I would say it's much the same. You expect someone to say something, or you really want it, so you hear it. It's a common problem. You need to practice ignoring your own thoughts as well as listening for hers.

frt

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My tulpa said two or three things and, when I was vizualising her naked, suddenly appeared to me covering her private. Because I'm in the very beginning of the creation process, I higly doubt that the cause of these actions isn't me parrotting. I try not to do it but, sometime, I do it so fast that I don't even realise it. So one of my objectives is to have a better control of myself.

It sounds to me like she doesn't want to be seen naked.

 

I don't know if I should build her a house in my wonderland. Does tulpa usualy like having imaginary house ?

 

I would recommend it. You like having a house to live in, right?

I come out of hibernation once in a blue moon.

 

They/them pronouns, please. (I've been using this display name since 2012 and people won't recognize me if I change it.)

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Thanks for answer. I think I'll put some materials in my wonderland so, if fennecgirl is right, my tulpa could build a house if she wants.

 

I did an other session in wonderland after beginning this thread. It's really strange because, when I'm looking at her a way I could see her breast or another private part she covers them instantaneously and, when I removed her hand, she put them back as soon as I "release" them. So I focus on her face and head, because it's kinda the only part of herself I can work on properly (and damn, making the face is difficult).

 

Also, I think I should say it : English isn't my first language. I think I'm pretty good at speaking it but, if you notice errors and want to yell at me because of them, do it, I won't mind.

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I think you're right. I just find funny the way that this assumption is manifesting. It's really like there are magnets in some parts of her body which are attracting her hands.

 

I think that working on the face could help me getting throught this "problem" because, maybe, if I feel like we "know" each other better I would think it's okay for me to see her naked (maybe my unconscious assumption is less strong or nonexistent for people I know well).

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If you want, when you get down to forcing the body form, I would suggest this guide

 

http://tulpa.info/guides/gideon-anatomy-guide.html

 

as a helpful way of keeping proportions, and also distracting you from the obvious.

I also think it's better than she's covering herself instead of jumping on you. If your mind worked like that then I would have told you to grow up a few years before starting on your tulpa.

frt

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29.03 updates:

 

Till now I did narration every day. Sometime I don't really know what to say but I think that, as long as I say something, it's okay, even if I speak about not knowing what to say.

 

I did a little bit of vizualisation last night but I was very tired so I didn't really make any progress. I also made some today and was a lot more productive, before falling asleep (not sur that I did but it's very probable). Thanks to Avalanche guide I was able to focus on the body without any "interference". I also took care of the face, but it's hard. It's changing between each session and, sometime, I have to struggle because it's "stuck" with the appearance of one of my relative. I think it's because I sometime think of real women during vizualisation in order to do the face right/boobs/other things right (seriously, at first, I was like "What does a nose look like ?"). Anyway, at first I was making her with blue eyes and dark hair and now she has blue eyes and very blond (almost white) hair.

 

I don't really mind, in fact she may be cuter this way and I've read in some guide that I'm suppose to accept change so...

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hello Dran :D the names Verdugo you can Narrate about anything for example i narrate my video games to my 4 tuppers like what the story is how the game system works how cheap bosses are etc XD

i hope me and you can be good friends

and also what is your tuppers name ? :3

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