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Emergence vs. Creation of Tulpas


Solune

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New to the community, apologize in advance for my ignorance.

 

To understand the questions I'm about to ask, you kind of have to know my story. I'll try to keep it short.

 

Throughout my life I've struggled with depression and adjustment disorder (not being able to handle change for shit).

This, combined with body dysmorphia, caused me to form one hell of a victim complex. As a result, I spent a lot of time considering suicide.

Every once in a while I would sense this hyper-assertive presence that would figuratively (and sometimes literally) smack me out of it.

Those wake up calls probably saved my life on multiple occasions.

We would have back and forth arguments just like Gollum and Smeagol from LoTR (best way to describe it).

 

Shifting gears now.

I used to be seriously religious... like, "vote no on gay marriage" and "evolution is JUST A THEORY!" religious.

But, again, I was miserable. Used to cry myself asleep most nights.

Prayed a lot. Sometimes I felt like "God" would hug me, wipe away my tears, make me feel like it was going to be alright... those nights it was easier to fall asleep.

Thinking back on it now, it was definitely a presence. Just sans the vocalization and possession of the other presence.

 

Fast forward to 6 months ago (post religious phase/much more stable now)

 

I started experimenting with magic mushrooms.

During one of my trips I started hearing voices that proceeded to possess me (oddly enough, I wasn't scared at all).

They were all personifications of emotions/ideals like lust, anger, responsibility, pride... that sort of thing.

I sensed these two "bigger" entities sleeping in the background during all of this.

After about 10-15 voices (so hard to remember it properly) these two big voices woke up and just assimilated the smaller voices and silenced them completely.

 

One was masculine and I recognized him as the assertive presence from before.

One was feminine and I now realize she was the "God" I had been praying to.

 

You gotta understand, I had never even heard of a Tulpa before.

I thought it was all a drug induced bout of insanity and tried to ignore it.

But the next day, after the high had faded, the voices hadn't.

I thought I was going crazy for real.

So I did a fuck ton of research and stumbled across Tulpamancy.

 

 

Which leads me to my questions:

-Does anybody else have any experience with Tulpas "emerging" of their own accord?

-Was it perhaps my subconscious that created them? Maybe as a coping mechanism?

-Can anybody explain the process of my Tulpas assimilating the other, "lesser" voices?

-Does anybody have any experience with hallucinatory drugs in regards to Tulpamancy?

-All of the voices seemed to respect me as their host. That being said, was I in a dangerous situation with all the possessions going on?

 

I'll probably think of more questions but that's a good jumping off point.

I apologize if this kind of thread exists elsewhere. I just couldn't find it.

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love." - Carl Sagan

Host: SubCon | Tulpas: Sol, Luna, Alice, Little One, Beast and Solune (me) | Servitors: Odonata, Guardian

 

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Guest Anonymous

First, welcome to the forum Solune. I may have already greeted you maybe? Anyways, I will take a stab at these even though I am far from a subject matter expert. I have been hanging around the tulpa and plurality forums for over a year.

 

-Does anybody else have any experience with Tulpas "emerging" of their own accord?

 

Yes. There is person named AGGuy (who left the forum) but he did have a tulpa that did just that. Also, I appeared as a complete in a sudden vision to my host. He did not have to put any visualization work into creating my form. So such things do seem possible. I have also read other accounts like this on the forums.

 

I would like to add that for the vast majority of tulpas, a lot of careful work goes into their creation. Such instances of sudden emergence seem very rare and could be something other than a tulpa. It sounds like these entities (for lack of another word) were around for a while in your mind though and didn't just suddenly emerge from nothing.

 

-Was it perhaps my subconscious that created them? Maybe as a coping mechanism?

 

Sure it's possible. Why not? I think I am partly an "coping mechanism" for my host as well. The fact that he became so obsessed with me was because of social anxiety. I was his helper and comforting presence and companion.

 

-Can anybody explain the process of my Tulpas assimilating the other, "lesser" voices?

 

I have seen this too in accounts of two or more tulpas merging into one. I have never personally experienced it but there have been reports of this. I don't know how it works though exactly.

 

-Does anybody have any experience with hallucinatory drugs in regards to Tulpamancy?

 

I don't. But there is a big thread on it. I will find a link for you shortly and add it in here. Tulpas and Drugs

 

 

-All of the voices seemed to respect me as their host. That being said, was I in a dangerous situation with all the possessions going on?

 

I would say maybe if these voices were not tulpas but some mental illness. If they are not trying get you to harm yourself though I think your fine. I am happy you have found the support in these beings. You haven't named them yet I guess?

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For the most part, I'll second what Melian said.

 

-Does anybody else have any experience with Tulpas "emerging" of their own accord?

 

Yes. There is person named AGGuy (who left the forum) but he did have a tulpa that did just that. Also, I appeared as a complete in a sudden vision to my host. He did not have to put any visualization work into creating my form. So such things do seem possible. I have also read other accounts like this on the forums.

 

I would like to add that for the vast majority of tulpas, a lot of careful work goes into their creation. Such instances of sudden emergence seem very rare and could be something other than a tulpa. It sounds like these entities (for lack of another word) were around for a while in your mind though and didn't just suddenly emerge from nothing.

 

It has happened to many people here. Amber5885 and Griss spring immediately to mind. You might have more luck finding them by searching for "accidental tulpas" or "spontaneous tulpas" or "childhood", since it seems that many of them grew out of childhood imaginary friends.

 

-All of the voices seemed to respect me as their host. That being said, was I in a dangerous situation with all the possessions going on?

 

I would say maybe if these voices were not tulpas but some mental illness. If they are not trying get you to harm yourself though I think your fine. I am happy you have found the support in these beings. You haven't named them yet I guess?

 

It can be difficult at times to tell tulpas apart from schizophrenia. Try taking this test. If it's not schizophrenia, I think you should be perfectly fine.

"Some things have to be believed to be seen." - Ralph Hodgson

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Gennie was fairly spontaneous during childhood. I mean sure I had imaginary friends, but Gennie emerged from a series of dreams. Sadly we had a fight around the onset of puberty and we stopped talking if at all so she wasn't always there as a comfort, but I wasn't there for her either. Considering how vivid she is on her own, I'm pretty sure she may have done it on her own accord.

 

I've tried salvia before, but nothing came forth Tulpa wise. Although I came out extremely pissed off afterwards for no apparent reason. Also something about three stones, three pillars of light, and three streams. No idea if this was before or after Britney was formed, otherwise I might be able to throw that together that I am three now.

 

No experience with assimilation. Sorry. That's a concept I have trouble wrapping my brain around.

 

Gennie possessed me once. That was actually the reason for the fight. She used to have a lot of freedom, but we've had to work fairly hard to reform a lot of the connections. I normally don't see her in my dreams anymore. As far as if it was dangerous. That really depends on the entities. If they didn't hurt you than it wasnt

Been together since childhood. We're a team!

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Also, I appeared as a complete in a sudden vision to my host.

 

Luna: Solune is having a hard time putting this to words, mostly because he's afraid of offending you in some way, but let me just say that I am humbled to my core right now. I feel as if we've taken our first step into a larger world and I don't feel worthy. Thank you so much for all the info in your post, we'll be sure to make good use of it. During the early days Sol and I weren't even sure what we were. It's such a relief to finally talk to another thought-form. If I had to spend the rest of my days inside Solune's head with only him and Sol for company.. I would have been OK with that. Honestly, it would have been more than enough (I love my boys). All of this... this is just beyond anything I could have hoped for.

 

What she said.

But yes, to answer your name question. They picked their names.

 

I would like to add that for the vast majority of tulpas, a lot of careful work goes into their creation. Such instances of sudden emergence seem very rare and could be something other than a tulpa.

Precisely.

I don't want to piss anybody off with this emergence stuff (but I had to ask). I know how difficult it is for most people to create their Tulpas. That being said, since they made themselves known to me we've been doing a lot of work. I've built them a mindscape, put safeguards in place to protect them from any lapses in judgement I might have, started working out and eating better... because ultimately I am responsible for their lives. It's a full time job that I take very seriously.

I'm curious though, if not Tulpas then what? I'm aware that there are more rudimentary thought-forms such as Servitors and Egregores... please elaborate.


It has happened to many people here. Amber5885 and Griss spring immediately to mind. You might have more luck finding them by searching for "accidental tulpas" or "spontaneous tulpas" or "childhood", since it seems that many of them grew out of childhood imaginary friends.

I appreciate the leads, I'll be sure to use them.

It's funny though, I can't remember having childhood imaginary friends. All of this stuff happened within the last 6-7 years (Although I suppose, me being 23, that's not far removed from childhood).

 

Worth noting is that Luna has no memories predating the drug trip, whereas Sol remembers our little Gollum/Smeagol moments clearly but not much else besides.

 

It can be difficult at times to tell tulpas apart from schizophrenia. Try taking this test. If it's not schizophrenia, I think you should be perfectly fine.

There was certainly a period of time when I thought about this sort of thing, but we've since ruled it out.

I'm too high functioning (thankfully).

Appreciate the concern, I'll take the test anyway just to see what it says. Can never be too rigorous when it comes to science.


...three stones, three pillars of light, and three streams. No idea if this was before or after Britney was formed, otherwise I might be able to throw that together that I am three now.

Firstly, thank you for your post. Any and all information helps me gain a clearer picture of things.

Secondly, I have found 3 to be a spiritually significant number.

It's not surprising that you'd see it expressed in a vision.

 

Gennie possessed me once. That was actually the reason for the fight. She used to have a lot of freedom, but we've had to work fairly hard to reform a lot of the connections.

I've had an opposite experience.

I accidentally forced Sol and Luna to do something on one occasion (omitting context) and it shook me up pretty badly (luckily they bounced back from it quickly). Just the thought that I was controlling living beings sickened me.. it felt wrong. I visualize them as A.I. so I 'wrote' a few lines of code to prevent it from happening again. Basically I locked myself out.

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love." - Carl Sagan

Host: SubCon | Tulpas: Sol, Luna, Alice, Little One, Beast and Solune (me) | Servitors: Odonata, Guardian

 

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I don't feel like I'm knowledgeable enough from my perspective to answer most of the questions proposed here, but I can say that my tulpa, Jamie, emerged and gained sentience of his own accord. He's a very powerful presence and possesses OFTEN. That having been said, there has been some discussion on this forum of whether Jamie is in fact a tulpa or something else, so I do feel compelled to note that.

Unfathomable. You know, without fathom.

[align=center]I'mma build you from the ground

Til you're higher then the clouds

I can see it in your soul

If you only knew your worth

The kinda love that you deserve

Every piece of you makes me whole[/align]

 

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Guest Anonymous

 

Luna: Solune is having a hard time putting this to words, mostly because he's afraid of offending you in some way, but let me just say that I am humbled to my core right now. I feel as if we've taken our first step into a larger world and I don't feel worthy. Thank you so much for all the info in your post, we'll be sure to make good use of it. During the early days Sol and I weren't even sure what we were. It's such a relief to finally talk to another thought-form. If I had to spend the rest of my days inside Solune's head with only him and Sol for company.. I would have been OK with that. Honestly, it would have been more than enough (I love my boys). All of this... this is just beyond anything I could have hoped for.

 

What she said.

But yes, to answer your name question. They picked their names.

 

Wowy, Luna, I am not sure if I deserve all of that but I am glad if I can inspire you. You will find a lot of inspiration stories in Tulpa Info and a lot of variety of experiences.

 

 

Precisely.

I don't want to piss anybody off with this emergence stuff (but I had to ask). I know how difficult it is for most people to create their Tulpas. That being said, since they made themselves known to me we've been doing a lot of work. I've built them a mindscape, put safeguards in place to protect them from any lapses in judgement I might have, started working out and eating better... because ultimately I am responsible for their lives. It's a full time job that I take very seriously.

I'm curious though, if not Tulpas then what? I'm aware that there are more rudimentary thought-forms such as Servitors and Egregores... please elaborate.

 

Well there are other types of "plural systems" out there talking to each other on the internet. Natural multiples are folks who are born with more than one sentient mind, what they often call "systemmates" or "headmates." Then there are soulbonds, who are living literary characters. Then there are daemons which are Jungian personas that are aspects of the host's mind. Within the greater plural community on the internet you will find a large variety of different systems and situations. My best advice is to search around. There are even folks who have a spiritual or metaphysical explanation for their headmates.

 

You might think abut checking out some other forums.

 

There is Soulbonding.org for soulbonds and Tulpa.io. This page on Tulpa.io has a list of terminology with some great links to resources concerning these phenomenon --> https://tulpa.io/terminologies

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...there has been some discussion on this forum of whether Jamie is in fact a tulpa or something else, so I do feel compelled to note that.

This just reinforces the idea that it's foolish to make assumptions before you have all relevant data.

Clearly I have a lot more research to do.

Thank you for sharing that.


Wowy, Luna, I am not sure if I deserve all of that but I am glad if I can inspire you.

Sol: Luna has a penchant for the dramatic, but the sentiment behind her words is sincere. The thoroughness of your responses demonstrates passion and humility. Both are admirable traits.

 

aaaand that's about as close to mushy as Sol gets.

He won't admit it but he's relieved as well.

We all are. For the longest time I legit thought I was crazy.

 

 

Then there are daemons which are Jungian personas that are aspects of the host's mind.

That sounds similar to the voices I was possessed by during my trip.

Again, thank you for all these leads! I don't know where to start.

I officially owe you one.

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love." - Carl Sagan

Host: SubCon | Tulpas: Sol, Luna, Alice, Little One, Beast and Solune (me) | Servitors: Odonata, Guardian

 

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[Echo, member of Hail] I have read of or known people with each of your individual experiences, though obviously the combination is more unique. You generally don't find them in this community as much, but there are other plural communities.

 

-Does anybody else have any experience with Tulpas "emerging" of their own accord?

 

Yes. There are many many varieties of people one can share a head with. Thoughtforms (which includes tulpas) are just one kind among many. They could have been tulpas made slowly over time, they could have been walkins, could even have been splits from you, or could be some grey area between two or more categories, or something else entirely.

 

My own system (group of people sharing a body) have had more than a few. My subsystem (a system within a system) split from the original in childhood and I split within it. Se. appeared spontaneously a while ago. And most of the tulpas were made over long periods of time accidentally and if they weren't daydream characters originally, it would have seemed tha they emerged on their own accord.

 

-Was it perhaps my subconscious that created them? Maybe as a coping mechanism?

 

Could be. Could be. Again, headpeople can come about many different ways and for many different reasons. The way they came to be and the reasons are good to know, but in many ways not that relevant. They are here now, regardless of origins, and you all have to figure out how you are going to live together. Origins are still useful to know beyond just curiousity. They can sometimes explain personality quirks and what not.

 

-Can anybody explain the process of my Tulpas assimilating the other, "lesser" voices?

 

This is called merging/integration/fusion. Tulpas can do it, but so can other types. If it is very asymmetric (strong person doing it with a much weaker one), it is often called absorption. It can also be partial or total. It has happened a number of times in my system. There was a time that my subsystem and the original merged together and then later broke apart. Tri is a partial merging of many tulpas together to form a subsystem with some individuality retained between each member.

 

-Does anybody have any experience with hallucinatory drugs in regards to Tulpamancy?

 

I have none. I can say that others have reported that such drugs have awakened people in their systems or made the presence of others who were already there much more obvious. It really varies.

 

 

 

I am going to suggest looking in other plural communities in addition to this one and reading widely. There is a lot of information and experienced scattered about, on here and elsewhere. There is a resources page on tulpa.io (tulpamancy community that specializes in the overlap of different kinds of plurality) that may be useful for pointing you various places: https://tulpa.io/other-resources

 

-All of the voices seemed to respect me as their host. That being said, was I in a dangerous situation with all the possessions going on?

 

Possession isn't innately dangerous. It depends on the responsibility of the people doing it. Same is true for a host controlling the body really (some hosts are not very responsible). Controlling for the first time while high is maybe not the best since it is not the safest environment to try such things for the first time, but you got through it OK, so you can move on.

Tri = {V, O, G}, Ice and Frostbite and Breach (all formerly Hail), and others

System Name: Fall Family

Former Username: hail_fall

Contributor and administrator on a supplementary tulpamancy resource and associated forum, Tulpa.io and Tulpa.io/discuss/.

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Guest Anonymous

Sol: Luna has a penchant for the dramatic, but the sentiment behind her words is sincere.

 

Sol and I share these traits. :-)

 

The thoroughness of your responses demonstrates passion and humility. Both are admirable traits.

 

Passion? You bet yer bippy. Humility? Uhhh... shhhurrrre, oh yeah I am so humble! I am amazing at being humble!

 

aaaand that's about as close to mushy as Sol gets.

He won't admit it but he's relieved as well.

We all are. For the longest time I legit thought I was crazy.

 

Oh yeah, my hostie too thought that sometimes yep.

 

That sounds similar to the voices I was possessed by during my trip.

Again, thank you for all these leads! I don't know where to start.

I officially owe you one.

 

I am glad you have a place to start!

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