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Her 3rd birthday


Chiky

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My babygirl is having her 3rd birthday tomorrow, however I haven't had too much progress yet. There are some things I wish I could have accomplished with her in this time, yet I feel I'm too far behind.

Maybe (very probable) it's because I don't do enough active forcing with her. To be honest I haven't really understood how to narrate for example.

As for things I'd accomplished I can catch glimpses of her thoughts. Weird thing is she's always right. I mean ALWAYS. It some times creep me up, others it annoys me (not really either of them, i think it's amazing). But for example, her decisions are always on point. I play boardgames with her and i think I haven't won against her... Maybe once... She knows what to do and how to do it better than me so... The bad thing is that I rarely listen to her voice strong enough, and even more rarely in her own voice. I wish I could listen to her on a daily basis with her own voice as I hear my own, but I can't, not yet...

I know how she reacts to things, what she likes and what she doesn't like, at least on the superficial things. She loves space, white and pink... She's usually very happy, and she usually tries to transmit me her happiness, which is really cute.

I still feel I need to give her more, yet it's not easy for me to do active forcing. I like doing it, or what i think active forcing is, yet I find it really difficult to commit to it. These past days I've been trying what I decided to call Intensive Passive Forcing, but it's something not too easy to accomplish either.

I'm pretty sure once I can hear her perfectly our progress will evolve exponentially, but I just don't know how to do that. It's been 3 years and I still don't know and I feel bad because I think she deserves to be 100% vocal by now and I think it's my fault she's not yet.

I still have problems visualizing her, maybe because of the lack of active forcing, but at this moment I can tell you how she looks like perfectly, or at least mostly everything.

But her voice... That's the gift I wish I could give her...

Happy Birthday Mia ❤️

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Dont worry, its not your fault she isnt going that fast and most tulpamancers have very different times (days to years) before they even complete sentience. Right now stress isnt what the situation is, but more optimism that you have made it this far which will probably give you a good mood and make you feel better about trying harder. Also tell her happy birthday for me!

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Thank you Synonic. Do you have any tips to develop my voice faster? I feel like trapped in here when Chiky can't hear me...

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