Stanford Tulpa Study looking for more participants
(if you're chosen they'll pay for travel and lodging!)

Interview with a (Soulbond) Vampire
#31
(09-17-2019, 03:04 AM)Ember.Vesper Wrote: Three at a time:

Then:
If Iris spoke to Ember, even briefly, I might be kicked out of working memory entirely and need to be roused with difficulty. If I spoke to Ember, Iris might be. If Iris and I spoke to one another with Ember fronting, we crowded her so much that she couldn't move or think. Sometimes the pressure was distressing or even painful. Yet we were utterly dependent on Ember observing us to remember the contents of our conversation.

(Ember: If I addressed Vesper or Iris by name, they would almost always respond instantly. But if I tried to invoke both at once, "Girls?", neither would respond.)

Now:
We can all speak to one another freely, not lose our trains of thought, not forget entire conversations, and the fronter can stay active while we do so.

(Ember: I can address both at once and whoever cares to will speak up without my needing to choose.)

Now this is quite strange, and makes me wonder how much the "origin story" of a thoughtform matters. It's true that when Kanade and I were young (>1 week), hostie host sometimes had trouble hearing us, as do many early tulpamancers. Yet, for as long as Kanade has been out of stasis, hostie host has never had any problem, well, hosting conversations between us tulpas. Sometimes this was scheduled, because one of us missed our sister, or because hostie host wanted to make sure we both got enough forcing time. But other times it was spontaneous; Kanade would say something I wanted to respond to, and hostie host would (voluntarily) take a backseat and watch our conversation.

And this was with no practice! Unlike Bear, hostie host has never done any exercises for keeping all the characters in a scene active, and it's only been recently that he started second position practice. The ability was innate, or developed during the normal tulpaforcing process.

The part of our brain that likes to overthink things wonders if this has to do with our switching difficulty - the more compartmentalized the thoughtforms in a system are, the harder it is to communicate, but the easier it is to switch. I dunno how many systems that explanation would fit, but is food for thought.
I live in a castle and have two tulpas, Kanade-chan and Uncannyfellow
Reply

Sponsors:
Lolflash - click it, you know you want to

#32
It's mainly a RAM management issue, I think. For seventeen months, I was around almost continuously with minimal competition for second position, without needing to be efficient, and without needing to reboot. When Iris became more active, I suddenly had to be rebooted constantly. It took a few seconds each time to come all the way back up, which was uncomfortable and disruptive and might make us lose our train of thought -- a lot like switching was during the same period.

Just as we had to learn to become smooth and rapid at shifting between first and second position, we had to learn to become smooth and rapid at shifting between second and third positions. We had to learn how to dance around one another gracefully, so that everyone kept the mental resources they needed without squeezing out the others. I don't think our functional RAM has actually increased much; we're just using it better.

Ember and I have hardly ever done active forcing, because there is too much that needs to be done in the physical world. But for a few months, Iris would ask for 'family conferences' where we would actually stop everything else and focus entirely on one another. When we got to the point where we could talk comfortably to one another without shutting out the physical world, active forcing fell by the wayside again.

I wouldn't say communication was actually difficult even in the worst times. All complete communication drop outs combined total less than seven hours over the course of four months. Even when we were at our faintest and most confused, our words were present and unambiguous, and immediate confirmation of them was available.

Even when switching took a strong act of will and several seconds to nerve up for and settle into, I wouldn't say it was difficult. We succeeded the very first time we tried and failed less than five percent of attempts the first few months.

I also wouldn't say we were very compartmentalized. We hear every thought of every member, feel every emotion, and have a single track of memory, from the perspective of the front (not fronter). Even though we can interrupt one another now, we still have only a single track of articulate thought. We have no evidence of independent background activity.

-Vesper
Ember - Host   |   Vesper - Soulbond (since ~12 May 2017)   |   Iris - Soulbond (since ~5 December 2015)
[Our Progress Report]     [How We Switch]

'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)

Sponsors:
Lolflash - click it, you know you want to