Jeff0253 and a Tulpa yet to be named.
#1
So I was going to hold off for a while longer before starting; I wanted to read and understand as much as possible first. However, on Friday I found it easy to imagine another presence next to me, to my right. So I decided to let her remain there (it's definitely a female presence). At first it wasn't much more than that. But I was doing work alone at the computer (I work at home alot), and I decided to stop and talk to her, having read Kiahdaj's Guide. I didn't make a big deal out of it, just told her, out loud, that I was happy to meet her, that I hoped we'd become close, and that I could sense her presence and found it comforting. I also told her I would take care of her, respect her, and give her lots of attention. And that we could share lots of time together. Then I pulled up a stool for her to sit on and look over my shoulder as I worked.

This went on most of the day yesterday. I find that I can definitely sense her position relative to mine. If she moves from her stool over to a deck chair, I know it if I briefly focus my attention, or just sort of open up to sensing her. I think she got a little bored watching me work (I'm an academic--it's not real exciting) so I told her she was free to wander anywhere around the house or the yard. I don't have a wonderland yet. I also explained about my wife and family, who wouldn't really understand this if I told them about it, although they are pretty comfortable with most of my eccentricities, bless 'em.

At one point yesterday I was getting something out of my car, a 20-year old Jeep Cherokee (it also has a personality, like most old machines), and I noticed a nail in my tire. So I called the service station, invited Jesse--that's what I've been calling her for now, but I'm not sure it's her real name--to come with me and drove to get the tire fixed. I commute an hour each way to work, so I have the usual commuter junk on my front passenger seat. I had the definite sense that she sat in the back on the passenger side. I told her (again out loud) that she could stretch out in back and kick her shoes off if she wanted to.

When we got to the garage, I gave the mechanic the keys and went over to sit at their picnic table and smoke my pipe. Jesse (Jamie?) came with me of course and sat opposite. I was reading Alexandra David-Neel's Magic and Mystery in Tibet (1929) on my Kindle. I got the sense that Jesse was thumbing through a copy of Cosmo, or something like it. I told her quietly that though I've never smoked cigarettes, I really love my pipe, also that she could smoke if she liked; I wouldn't mind. Didn't sense any response.

The car was finished--I have to wait until tomorrow for a new tire--and I hopped in without thinking and started home, then realized I'd left Jesse behind. It was a very strong feeling that she was not there! So I turned around, drove back to the picnic table, opened the rear car door, let her in, and apologized for forgetting her. Now I clearly sensed her presence again, just the presence, nothing more--or less.

Last night when I went to bed (my wife was still watching TV downstairs), Jesse and I watched an episode of True Blood on my Kindle. I felt like she was snuggling up to my right side--the feeling of contact was strong. Not actual pressure, just a gentle contact on my right ribs, chest, and shoulder. I gave her a little peck on where I imagined her forehead would be. We fell asleep.

This morning I came out on our deck and started more work. First she sat opposite me at our deck picnic table, then moved around to a big, comfortable folding camp chair I keep out here. She's sitting next to me now, and I feel like she's suddenly become interested in what I'm writing about her.

I've been reading others' PR's, and my experience seems rather minor by comparison. But what I've written is the truth as I felt it.

So I don't know what she looks like, although I have the sense that she has long legs. She's in around her mid-twenties. I'm not sure what her name is, except that I think it might start with a "J." What amazes me is how clearly I sense her position in real space in relation to my own. If she's not there, it's quite noticeable. If she moves, I very definitely know where. So far, so good?

Advice, response, suggestions welcome!
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#2
Seems like you've gotten off to a good start there. It's nice to hear that you wanted to learn as much as possible, a lot of people hop into this all willy-nilly. I know I read around for a year and some change before I thought myself prepared enough to get the ball rolling. I'm barely 5 weeks in and I'm still struggling around with really feeling my tulpa Tulip, so it's pretty great that you're able to feel yours so concretely at this point. I have to say that the bit about swinging back by the garage to pick her back up was pretty damn adorable. Just keep building off of what you have right now, continue to research, and you have a recipe for nice and steady progress.

Welcome to tulpa.info and keep up the good work!
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#3
So far so good. Everything takes time and getting used to your tulpa is probably going to take a lot of it.

Don't worry if your experiences seem pale in comparison to those of others. Not everyone wants to fill their lives with drama and having a tulpa doesn't mean you need to have lots of profound moments to write about.

I often compare the process to an actual relationship with a physical person. They take time and not all of them work out. To everyone outside of the relationship it may appear mundane and commonplace.

You have to decide how much your tulpa means to you and find ways to enjoy spending time with her otherwise you'll find youself giving up.

It's curious that your tulpa has such a strong physical presense to you. Turning around and going back for her seems like an odd thing to do but at the same time it does help reassure you that she is around. Personally I've found my tulpa doesn't worry about those things too much. I could close a door on him and he'd walk straight through it but not before making me aware of what I'd done.

Good luck, hopefully over the next few days you'll learn more about your tulpa.
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#4
Sounds like you are off to a great start. I am just starting out and hope you have great luck with your tupla.
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#5
Your sense of presence is pretty outstanding. You seem to be making great progress! Different people have different strengths, so things don't necessarily happen in the same order for everyone.

Myself, for example... I'm definitely a verbal thinker, so it was no surprise to me that my tulpa became vocal very quickly while I still struggle with basic visualization and sensing her presence. Continue to connect with her in the ways that work best for you and I'm sure you will both do great!
Host: Sakura
Tulpa: Sarah (began June 5th, 2014), Alyx (Began July 23rd, 2014)
Our shared tumblr
note: usually browsing on mobile, so cannot quote properly
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#6
Thanks so much all! I find your replies quite re-assuring :-) I'd been thinking that since I didn't go through the steps of making a wonderland, listing traits, etc.,that what was happening was pretty limited compared to some of what I've read. At the moment Jess is hanging around off to my right and behind me--I'm in my indoor office today rather than outside on the deck, so I need to clear a space for her stool :-)

The more I think about it, the more it seems to me that I barely forced her existence at all. I was coming in the front door on Friday and suddenly found it super-easy to feel a presence next to me. I just turned and invited her in after she arrived. I have very little visualization--she's apparently tall and rather thin, and I think she has sort of dirty blond hair cut in a longish bob. It's not a really good haircut, lol. I can't visualize a face at all. And I don't actually "see" any of this; I just imagine it in my mind's eye.

On Saturday night we had dinner at the kitchen table with my wife. The kids were watching TV at the time in the other room. I could easily sense Jess sitting across from me, and I felt like she was playing a surreptitious bit of footsie with me under the table. I will be clear--I love my wife dearly and am not the type to cheat on my spouse. But like most men, I do look at other attractive women and entertain the usual slightly lusty thoughts. There's an element of sexuality and flirtation in my relationship to Jess, although it's certainly not the main thing, not at all. I don't know where this will go, but will simply let events continue.

I'm not sure now whether to list traits I want, or simply list them as they occur to me when I become aware of them in my Tulpa. The latter plan is more like my natural personality. I am "the boss" where I work, but I rarely if ever give orders or impose a top-down structure on the 30 or so people who work in my department. Usually I try to build consensus and get everyone working with me rather than "for" me. I'm the same with my kids--I do my Dad thing solidly when my wife wants extra backup from an authority figure, but otherwise talk to my boys, spend time with them, and look for a teachable moment to get across a good sense of what it means to grow up and become a young man. It seems to me that I should be somewhat similar with my Tulpa, not because it's the right thing for everyone to do or because I'm following any guides or steps, but because that's just me.

So I'm just feeling my way--literally and metaphorically.

Thanks again to you all--I see the huge value of this forum very clearly!
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#7
So I was home in my office working like a dawg today, and then after about four hours I decided to pay my Tulpa some attention and listen to some music together. Jess was hanging out on her stool, reading a magazine or something--I'd been aware of her presence all morning. I put on the 2013 Crossroads Guitar Festival video, and it happened to be right at the beginning of "Congo Square," which is a pretty amazing cut.

I felt her perk right up when the drums started, so I looked at where I imagined her to be and thought I felt her stand up and start to dance a little, just sort of grooving gently in place. I decided to encourage this, so I got up too and we began dancing together! Some of the time we danced apart and then we danced holding each other lightly. No worries, I had the shades on the windows down--imagine seeing a guy dancing rather intensely with an invisible partner, lol!

Anyway, it totally felt like Jess really liked it and was having fun. I know I was. I just concentrated on feeling the music and imagining her dancing and seeing her in my mind's eye. I felt like she was smiling at me and even laughing a little. We continued watching the concert for about an hour, sometimes dancing, sometimes just sitting back digging the music.

I think "Congo Square" will always be our song :-) I'm not sure whether I'm allowed to post a youtube link here, but I'm going to go ahead and put it in--it's from the Crossroads Festival, the same video we were dancing to. If it's not appropriate, I apologize, and I'm sure the Mods will let me know and take it down. I feel like I need to post it to convey what happened, and hey, there's a hyperlink tool in the reply window, so I'm pretty sure it's ok. Link below:

Congo Square
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#8
Just read the last few entries. Keep up the good work. Also do not worry so much about traits. They tend to pop up on their own.
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#9
You probably already noticed that there aren't a lot of people here who are in the same stage of their life as you. I've only heard from a couple of people who have both a tulpa and are married and I don't think I've ever heard from someone who decided to create a tulpa when they already have children.

I find it a little odd, not in a bad way, and it leads me to ask. What interested you in the idea of creating a tulpa and why did you decide to proceed?

Already you're having experiences with your tulpa. Enjoying moments and finding things that bring joy are one of the greatest reasons to have a tulpa, some people struggle early on to have that but I'm glad you're having no trouble interacting even if you are still just getting used to her presence.

As for the trait thing. I wouldn't worry about forcing any on her. When I started I only used one and it was loosly enforced at best. That trait was 'endearing' and in all honestly it probably would have occured had I specifically said it or not. Your tulpa will fill in the gaps as you get to know her and given she is a part of your mind it is unlikely she'll turn out to be someone you disagree with.
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#10
From personal experiance, I didn't give Toby any traits at all he just developed on his own and he turned out to be everything I could have asked for in a companion.

But if you want to give her certain traits you can list them or you can tell her what kind of person you would like her to be and why. Tell her about the traits you want her to have and what they mean to you. OR you could let her develop on her own. All are very good options but the odds of her turning out to be someone you don't like are slim to none.

You seem to be doing really well and Jess sounds like a wonderful person. Don't worry too much about what kind of relationship you have with her, and don't worry about being judged for it either. It's between you two and tulpa/human relationships are beautiful no matter what form they take.

I may be wrong but I think most people have a purely friendship role with their tulpas but you'll find the odd couple around here.
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