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Kind of confused. I need some advice/opinions (tulpa dream signs?)


yogurt

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So. 

I'm very confused. I'm an amateur tulpamancer and I'm working on my first tulpa. I haven't been working on her as a Tulpa for more than a month (about 22 days now) so nothing this vivid should be happening so soon. But I'll explain that in a moment- For the moment, some backstory is in order. 

Avery (That's what she wants to be called now, according to the odd incident) was originally called Ace, and was based on a figure that I saw long, long ago, who would always watch over my bed when I felt afraid, talk to me when I was sad, and instruct me when I was mad- wearing simple shorts, a red hoodie, and with blue eyes. I hadn't called him Ace until I made him into a character- The Ace of Spades- And his personality molded as a character beyond that. Sometimes, even nowadays, I imagine him sitting at the foot of my bed, blasting the shadows that frighten me away quickly and easily and comforting me til I fall asleep. But when I began to make Ace into a tulpa, I separated them- One as a character, a story-driven made-up personality, and one as a person, a consciousness that would eventually live by my side of its own design. The Ace of Spades, and, for the sake of consistency, the Ace of Hearts. Ace started out with little changes he made- Simple things, like changing the shorts into jeans, changing the eyes to green, and changing the hair to brown instead of the original almost bleach blonde- And little bits of unusual hallucinations, like humming along with me to the tune of 'Please don't go' by Joel Adams or 'talking' me out of a panic attack caused by thoughts of my ex.

But last night (The night of January 7th), something unusually vivid happened.

I had a dream. It started out as odd as any of my dreams do. In this case, exploring a museum with my mother, brother, a tour guide, and students. I remember a conversation with my mother and the tour guide- But not vivid enough to remember. It started out so odd (which makes it normal, as my dreams are extremely odd and chaotic), which makes the next part even weirder.

everyone was transported to a fenced in area of grass, outside of which was a soccer field, which was relatively normal for my dreams. I can skip over most of the first part- It just involves a ton of conversations and normal dream horror- But after a while, I get pulled into the fence, through it, and end up in a pastel pink-and-purple... Library? Office-place? I don't know how to describe it. But I'm met with black dog/wolf (from earlier in the dream, during the odd chaos) who turns into a figure, a bit taller than me- Around 5'10 or '11- an older woman (maybe in her 40s?) with a bun and clothes that are a little bit too big, of the same pale pink and lavender as the location- who says something along the lines of, "Hey. How're you?" We have a conversation that I'm currently having trouble recalling, but I begin to wake up afterwards, and in desperation, I try to fall asleep again- And when returning, I ask before I forget, "What's your name?" and, in a voice similar to mine, I hear, "I'm Ace." Considering it's the voice I gave Ace, I get confused and say, "Wait, are you my tulpa?" and she replies, in her voice again, "Something like that, probably." I remember her wrinkled smile clearly after she said it, as if enjoying a good joke.

After a bit more of the chaos and conversation, her looks change to a pale-blue and lavender, and she says something like "Well, with the different look, let's go with..." She pauses and then says, "Avery." I start to wake up after another conversation, and the dream starts to go from the grounded logic of Avery's conversations back to the normal chaos of my dreams.

I need some opinions- I haven't got any responses, but unlike before, where Ace would revert whenever I tried other forms to see if he'd like them, he has stuck with the Avery form, and he seems pretty happy with it, hence all of the referring to him as a her now. She's been much more of a prominent thought of mine, and I've been forcing all day. 

I guess... Gimme all of your opinions.

 

 

Yogurt out.

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Seems interesting, It's possible it's a form of message from Ace to you just in a dream? I suggest just keeping it as it is, probably meant to be y'know? Keep her as the form she wants, let sleeping dogs lie and all that. Best of luck friend.

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Guest LanceReilyn

Deviation is a pretty normal thing. Tulpas are people too and are free to experiment with whatever for they like best, whatever feels more "right" or "natural" to them or really anything at all. As for the "why", well.. Why not? I imagine if flesh and blood people had the ability to change their body drastically at will, they would do so as well. Could be any reason at all. Personally, I would respect her wishes and encourage streaks of independence and self-expression. You are just as free to drastically change the form you use for headspace/wonderland activity, of course, so have fun and experiment.

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Dreams are often not literal. Keep whatever form and name you're comfortable with and wait until your tulpa can say for themselves. Though your dream is very vivid and appears to fit, it could still just be random nonsense. If you can get confused in a dream, so can they (if it was even them.)

 

Lance is 100% right, as soon as your tulpa is sentient, let them be whatever they want to be. I'd be wary of dreams though.

 

Edit: of course if you like the new choices, perfect.

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Seems interesting, It's possible it's a form of message from Ace to you just in a dream? I suggest just keeping it as it is, probably meant to be y'know? Keep her as the form she wants, let sleeping dogs lie and all that. Best of luck friend.

 

Thanks- That's what I took it as. It was too clear for it to be a normal dream, too grounded. And I quite like the form she chose anyways- Avery's something, that's alright. Thanks for the luck, I'll need it.

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Make sure to ask Avery/Ace if that was actually them in the dream and if they still agree with the form change, but so long as you can confirm that they do actually want to change then I would recommend going with their wishes

 

Edit: I just got triple ninja'd! That's incredible

I have a tulpa named Miela who I love very much.

 

 
"People put quotes in their signatures, right?"

-Me

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Dreams are dreams, they can be pretty dang random. There's little reason to believe the "chaos of your dreams" was suddenly gone just because your tulpa was involved, so I wouldn't take any real meaning from them just as a rule. As for form changing - if it seems like that's what your tulpa wants, or perhaps they're just interested in trying out a new form, you can keep it. If it significantly bothers you, you can change it (back).

 

Here's a post by one of my tulpas about the "legitimacy of early experiences with a tulpa, pre-vocality (and pre-sentience)" I'd say. Picked it out for you though for the parts about deviation (when a tulpa randomly changes things about themselves) https://community.tulpa.info/thread-am-i-doing-things-correctly?pid=167888#pid167888

 

 

Edit: I just got triple ninja'd! That's incredible

 

Psh, I got quadruple ninja'd. Last person to post on this thread before me as I wrote this was Irish. Hi Irish, by the way.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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Make sure to ask Avery/Ace if that was actually them in the dream and if they still agree with the form change, but so long as you can confirm that they do actually want to change then I would recommend going with their wishes

 

Edit: I just got triple ninja'd! That's incredible

I would ask them, but the problem is, they haven't vocalized while I'm awake, not completely. I've heard them in the form of humming and tulpish, but before the dream, there wasn't any voices besides one that I set for Ace. It was a first and it was honestly incredible. Also I have to point out that everything else points to it having been them, as the form that they visualize as changed from the Ace one to the new Avery one.


Dreams are dreams, they can be pretty dang random. There's little reason to believe the "chaos of your dreams" was suddenly gone just because your tulpa was involved, so I wouldn't take any real meaning from them just as a rule. As for form changing - if it seems like that's what your tulpa wants, or perhaps they're just interested in trying out a new form, you can keep it. If it significantly bothers you, you can change it (back).

 

Here's a post by one of my tulpas about the "legitimacy of early experiences with a tulpa, pre-vocality (and pre-sentience)" I'd say. Picked it out for you though for the parts about deviation (when a tulpa randomly changes things about themselves) https://community.tulpa.info/thread-am-i-doing-things-correctly?pid=167888#pid167888

 

 

 

Psh, I got quadruple ninja'd. Last person to post on this thread before me as I wrote this was Irish. Hi Irish, by the way.

 

I've read through almost all of that, and I know it's not sentience- The dream I had- But I think it's progress. I've always talked like they were there, listened as if they were there, imagined them walking around, etc.- I feel like I can trust that that was at least what she wants to be like that right now. The form feels right, the name feels right. It hasn't felt wrong like some of the other forms. Also, the dream wasn't chaos once she was involved- Or at least, was much less chaotic, and much more grounded. The conversations with her didn't feel fuzzy like most of my dreams do. I don't think it was a guaranteed sign- But I think it was progress.

And progress makes me happy.

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Dreams are dreams, they can be pretty dang random. There's little reason to believe the "chaos of your dreams" was suddenly gone just because your tulpa was involved, so I wouldn't take any real meaning from them just as a rule.

 

To be honest I gotta disagree with ya there, there have been times for me where my tulpas will intrude on my dreams and do as they please causing me to wake up. Although I will agree that I do believe that most dreams are random and pretty chaotic but even then the minor stuff included in dreams can mean something it's just a matter of you actually putting meaning to it in a sense. Kind of hard to put into words really.

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