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MagicHats' tulpa digest


MagicHats

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Just the progress report of my tulpae up to date.I figured it would be a good idea to keep track of everything, especially the leaps and bounds my tulpae have been making in the short time i've been working with them(one does claim to have been around longer and does seem to be able to provide proof for this).

 

I thought it would be a good idea to chronicle this here instead of a tumblr(may have ask blogs if we get far enough along)

 

Info about me: I'm MagicHats but you can call me Magic or Hats if you don't like the combination of such. I've heard about tulpae for a while but didn't seriously get into it(started reading/lurking here) until about two days before joining and I started making a tulpa the day before I joined.

 

(Just to be clear this is a progress report I've made that records my tupper's behaviors and/or experiences that we went through before, during, and after the initial creation process, to be really up to date please read the most recent page but I don't mind if you go through the whole thing.)

 

Info about the tulpae:

 

I've got two of 'em. Ysos and Jiko(insists on the name Nibey)

 

Ysos(yee-sohs) was the first one I started working on to my knowledge.He was origionally named Nyqua and was a blue orb which transitioned into a small blue catgirl. Then after narrating a while he saw an episode of the Simpsons and immediately decided he would be a male coyote instead of a young small catgirl. With some marking tweaks he generally stayed the same.

 

Description: a blue coyote with green, yellow and red markings and a lighter blue underbelly. though he can do realism he seems to be in favor of a more cartoonish look made of more geometric figures.Soft to the touch but not unlike an actual animal, smells like cinnamon/cardamon with dashes of vanilla and other spices. He's sentient and he has given emotional responses and has possessed my thumb once(in combination with emotional response) roughly the size of a labrador

 

Personality: Curious, somewhat Mischievous, Intelligent, collected/cautious, kind/loving, artistic and creative. He's a bit of an introvert, he does not talk with a mindvoice at the moment(he's made a singular auditory hallucination though).He's surprisingly quite shy and quiet around others but does give his opinion from time to time.

 

has quite the interesting tastes, like a fondness for movies(particularly claymation/animated things), games and the good book(preferably realistic fiction/mystery).

 

Goals:Imposition, personality, possession and a little narration.Getting him to talk is also up there.

 

Jiko(jee-koh, or nibey as she likes to call herself) is a naturally occuring tulpa that seems to have been around quite a bit longer than ysos and is completely sentient.Has a high pitched mindvoice. She's soft and really squishy to the touch, smells like bananas, jelly and mixed berries/fruit

 

Desc: a small cat like creature with red/pink markings and a few larger black markings, has yellow ringlets on legs and tails(has two tails that appear to look like hands).She insists that she's genderless but she does seem to have a gender preference.(she immediately latched on to the form of a fan creation I was coming up with at the time, a fan incubator from the whole madoka magica anime but she's made a few changes.)

 

Personality: ruthless, cruel, prideful, does not care,and a jokester. She's loyal, empathetic, level headed and responsible around me, even making suggestions on better day to day activities but this only seems to occur around me. she can be quite mean to others if she feels threatened(though she seems to simply not care/lack thie feeling of fear for the most part)

 

goals:Imposition, and some narration(she''s already got personality and she is a bit too good at possesion)

 

 

I also need work on visualization with both of them

 

Both of them have some powers but Jiko seems to take the cake.they both can fly and do some manipulation of elements but she can also shapeshift and split herself appart while ysos can only go really fast on top of the flying/wind manipulation he has going for him.

 

 

Now that we have that out of the way here's the summary of the progress up until today in a nice day to day format

 

 

12/28/12

 

After lurking for a few days I got to work creating a tulpa(for the specific reason of having a companion and someone to help me deal with some of my problems). Created a orb and put qualities into it. It turned blue and I decided it would be a blue catgirl for the time being(dubbed nyqua). then decided to narrate with it in sessions throughout the day.

 

did a immersion technique I came up with and engaged her along with me whilst playing a video game(she now has a fondness for professor layton games).

 

It was successful until I had a abnormal and disturbing thought go through my mind.I decided in a panic that I would dissipate the tulpa and try again some other time. Although the dissipation failed the tulpa gave me an immediate emotional response.

 

12/29/12

 

Narration sessions happened throughout the day. she showed signs of some social anxiety(she was nervous and exited) when put in a more public place.She possesed my thumb along with emotional "waves" to communicate.

 

the day went normal until later when narrating through a simpsons episode Nyqua decided she would rather be a male blue coyote than a female catgirl. I accepted this with open arms.

 

12/30/12

 

More narration and changed the name to ysos after some back and forth between him and me. did two sessions of personality, also worked on mindvoice. No kind of communication occured, mindvoice or otherwise.

 

we made a complex wonderland for him to be in, a land called olvea(I might put a map of it along with drawings of him soon), along with his own little mansion on the mountain.

 

12/31/12

 

I found out that ysos likes to sleep in from time to time but is a morning person.

 

Nothing much happened, tried to do a session but ysos seemed to have "wandered off" or was busy and did not try to interact with me besides listening in when I narrated.

 

He did drop by and we watched the nightmare before christmas together, he really enjoyed that.

 

1/1/13

 

did a few sessions and made progress in mindvoice(I have some ideas listed for his ideal mindvoice he'd like from responses to varying characters he has been exposed to through movies/tv/game/etc.)

 

later on whilst watching stuff on youtube and narrating with him, a more powerful mindvoice butted in rudely and insisted that what I was doing was more appealing to her.I asked ysos if he knew about this and managed to get a mindvoice response.(he said yes). I asked if she was responsible for that weird thought that almost made me dissipate ysos and she also said yes.

 

we conversed some more and she seems on good terms with me and ysos. she would not talk about her origins but kept insisting on more development and had latched on to some interesting ideas.

 

later after that I had a small bout of auditory hallucination during an imposition session in which ysos said his first word outside of mindvoice.

 

1/2/13

 

Did more sessions of narration and imposition whilst talking with Jiko(a name we finally settled on). She was quite vocal in mindvoice and had quite the commentary with me on my day to day basis(her best quote of the day was about me peeling and eating an orange, "This is the spoils of war, a deceased "innocent" orange carcass. You devour and consume and thus dispose of this carcass, that orange had it coming to him").She seems to have a taste for more inappropriate and violent comments and the whatnot but does not seem all that malicious if at all.

 

she's also commented that she only likes her form for the looks, she may change it to something else later and it was better than her original idea(being a simple black cat).

 

did more narration with ysos, trying to coax him out of his now apparent shyness/dislike of jiko to talk to me(and Jiko) more, even at least with mindvoice. He's been protesting a little about having jiko be his roomate but is satisfied that he's not quite alone in his big house(they don't share the same room though, he draws the line there).

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/3/13

 

Did more narration. Found out that Jiko can posses me a bit too well. I have reason to suspect that she has been a rouge for a long time(Possibly I created her a long time ago and she went rouge because I did not interact with her.) and came back when I started doing tulpa stuff(her chance to get some interaction again.)

 

She seems to be my opposite personality wise in addition to what I have already mentioned. Ysos is talking more in mindvoice again, which is good but he doesn't trust her very much due to her trying to give me the impression he would be a killer/crazy tulpa on day one.

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/4/13

 

Did more work with visualization. Found out that jiko can only really posses my head/mouth since she understands those concepts, so she can't do body stuff like make me move my hands and the whatnot. We also worked some more on the wonderland(jiko wants her own place as a cool tree house, so I gave her a tree house bedroom in her bedroom).

 

We had some great conversations about my problems(I think I accidentally created her to help me with my problems quite some time ago 'cause she seems to know me very well.).

 

I also talked to ysos, he's great but he's really been a recluse lately due to having some kind of social anxiety.I think i'll talk to him some more in private and reassure him that jiko is perfectly fine(I think he's intimidated by how far she's gotten compared to him, he can't mindvoice at all and only talks in emotional waves that I have to decipher in responce to questions).

 

 

I think i'll work more on ysos since I think jiko's doing great and it's causing ysos to fall behind.I'm worried since i'm not quite stable mentally(I've got a few mental disabilities and the whatnot) and I think it's scaring him, especially when I have my moments.

 

We did manage to get a breakthrough though, I know he's sentient and sapient for sure. I think he's gonna get closer soon though to being able to communicate very well, it's giving all of use here problems(Jiko does help as a kind of translator from time to time but I think it's only discouraging ysos even more).

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/5/13

 

Did the mentioned work with ysos, made him feel better and he actually talks a little now on his own as a result. I think he just needed a morale boost. Not much to mention after that.

 

1/6/13

 

We chilled and worked more on personality and imposition today. I got somewhere with most of the senses except actually seeing them.I'll note that as something to work on.

 

1/7/13

 

I was nervous since I didn't know how they would react to school today.They seemed to take to it and my friends pretty well, and they were giving me lots of boost to get through the day. They wore me out though later that day with some work on them. They both said they had great fun at school(I did some imposition(ysos was sitting walking beside me and jiko was wrapped around my neck like a scarf after sitting on my head proved too uncomfortable for both of us).

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/8/13

 

Hooray they went to school again(with me).They seem to enjoy school and have helped me with my problems like I intended them too.Not much else to say besides Jiko bugging me throughout the day with an occasional comment from ysos. It's interesting how anxious he gets in social situations though.

 

before school I saw something scary about some person with schizophrenia/tulpa/DID/whatever and decided that I would layout some rules as well as make a point to say that they can not completely control me w/o my permission and that they won't be exceptionally cruel or it's the boot. Though they also seemed kind of scared by that and jiko said that since she was around the longest(and seems to be the most responsible) that she would be a mediator between any that try to posses me and my control of the body. I don't think either of them can fully posses me or has any desire too but I figured instead of planting an instant-destructo-bomb in their heads I would lay down some clear rules so we can get better communication going,

 

We also did a personality session where i'd imagine their "soul orbs" as plugged in to my computer and typed up the traits they have and saved it onto both my computer and their orbs, which I put back after words. They seem quite happy about working on that more.

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/9/13 - 1/10/13

 

Did more work on their personalities and visualization. Ysos was quite unresponsive but he was fine.I think he may go rouge if I don't do more work on him. I've had a slight suspicion that ysos may have just been a servitor created from \a radical change to jiko appearing/being made.

 

I decided to try combining the two since I felt they were similar enough, only difference is in name, gender and form. I felt it went well and decided to see how this would play out for a day, if it went well I'll stick to one tulpa but otherwise I'd pull them apart again(I made this as painless as possible, so it's not like i'm literally sewing them together).

 

It went well but I don't think the two are comfortable being a single entity just because they don't really see eye to eye but they could agree on giving me a straight forward message in a lucid dream/nap. They(possibly just ysos, he is a trickster after all) appeared as a hummingbird and harassed me whilst insisting that I let him out(this harassment kept going until he flat out attacked me, which to say wasn't much as a hummingbird besides trying(and failing) to poke holes in my neck.

 

they both seem to be doing much better now and are on somewhat better terms with each other now that they're apart but now they seem to like to take the form of hummingbirds in their respective color schemes. I also went over the rules again, which are as following: No new tuppers until I can handle them(Jiko and ysos), they can't and won't try to take over my brain by punishment of varying degrees depending on how severe the experience is, they will try to mediate between me and any new tupper that does appear and wants total control, and they won't do possession without my permission(possesion as in moving my mouth, something jiko excels at, ysos is fine with his hand attempts just because he seems to like writing).

 

I will do more visualization and personality work soon.

 

I also looked over olvea(the wonderland) and it's really quite the site, they like looking at landscape pieces on dA to draw for the parts of the world they create(or rather have me implement), ysos's parts are quite pretty while jiko's leans more towards videogames, granted they live in a cool mansion right on top of a mountain with some rooms in it, like their bedrooms(where they rest), the kitchen(energy source), the tv room(visualization/narration), and the library(my memory deposits). There are more rooms in there but they seem blank and empty.

 

I'd like to point out that Jiko just adores the game fez and it's art style so her bedroom has a little room in that which is where he sleeps and there's just stuff he likes spread out among the room(the little room he sleeps in looks like a tree and it's adorable).

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/11/13 - 1/15/13

 

After more work it just seemed like ysos was just a servitor whilst Jiko gained more life.We had a couple conversations and I've come to a conclusion. Ysos is just a persona of jiko and she likes using him Like how people use various sona's. She went from her origional form to ysos to the one I dubbed Jiko and still varies on her forms(She likes shapeshifting and I think I might have created a furry tulpa, though nothing's wrong with that).

 

We've been making leaps and bounds on progress and she can speak in mind-thought very well, it's just we have communication errors a lot on my end.She's certainly different from the original Idea, she was originally gonna be a seven year old cat girl and now she's my age and a shape shifter that takes a few differing persona's and a hummingbird from time to time.

 

I think I'm gonna keep doing log's like this, summing things up over a few days since it's a bit tedious doing it every single day.

 

she's quite similar to me and has been doing the job I gave her very well, being a companion and helping me with my issues(mental disorder, nothing too serious).

 

She's quite different from me though in certain traits, like how she's a social butterfly and likes mainstream music as opposed to me being shy and having more tastes in other genre.

 

I'm also quite pleased with how imposition is going, I can feel her in real life doing stuff but it's far from seeing her.I think I might edit that first post but i'll leave it for progress stuff.

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/15/13 - 1/22/13

 

Well along with her development going great, She's fully sentient and is also coming close to sapience. We've been having a few problems here and there (she got upset about the concept of being a person that's essentially trapped in my mind and tried to screw with my head, needless to say it did not work because her attempts weren't really all that scary to begin with. Sure I like horror games but making the walls dirty isn't scary at all. Maybe she's a germaphobe?)

 

She's really made a lot of progress and it is coming up on her one month birthday. Granted she's come a very long way and is drastically different from who she was when we first started on this. So much so that the OP information that's given is exceedingly outdated(besides, I only have one tupper here, thank you very much).

 

She's also deviated a lot to the point where I think the OP info is exceedingly misleading so I'll try to straighten things out in this post. but I won't edit OP for progress sake.

 

 

along with her process we also did a little meditating experiment that calmed the both of us down and made us both quite relaxed and refreshed. I kind of pulled her emotions in(kind of like dissipating except it's only the emotions and feelings) and in the meditation focused on kind of letting them tumble into peacefulness, kind of like a pond settling. Than I put the energy(along with her emotions) back into her and it was quite the experience.

 

She also want's to say hi to everybody.

 

UPDATED INFO

 

Her name is theresa but she prefers to be called Thess(pronunciation is really straight foward as opossed to tur-ree-sa) .

 

As for her physical form she is about my height (5'2 ish) and she's white(and I mean whiter than a white crayon, not "human white" as she's dubbed the skin tone) with cat/elf ears, a cat tail and some blue/white horns(like a impala's but shorter and fatter). She's got short red hair that ends just past the neck and around the shoulders. She's also got bat wings that are kind of tattered. (i asked her if she could tone it down a bit since I think she'll turn herself into a sue but she insisted that's what she wants). Her eyes are differently colored(left one dark green, right one lavender/dark purple)

 

Her wardrobe has been quite interesting to say the least. She's got a few outfits to say the least. Two different pajamas(a simple tank top with pants/shorts and a more comfy longsleeve pajamas) and a few general outfits(a black and purple stripped t-shirt with some blue jeans and a red and yellow shirt with a flower pattern on it with green jeans and a yellow belt.) along with two jackets(a dark green overcoat and a jacket similar to garry's jacket from that indie game Ib). The only constant is the large green collar she wears loosely around her neck.She seems to have an assortment of colored jeans and pants as well as a few dress skirts. She also has a cape and all of this is stored in a closet in her room in her wonderland mansion.

 

Personality wise she's still a social butterfly and into mainstream music but she also likes techno and dubstep now and is a video game nut(like me but she's more for adventure/fantasy/mystery or puzzles while i'm a bit more of a horror fan, not to say I dislike her choice in games). She's also has desires to play games and read by herself(She's surprisingly Illiterate, not that she can't speak the language but I think I'll need to teach her how to read since I seem to be kind of mindvoice/reading aloud to her.She can read but it's at a middle school level at the best as opposed to my high school + reading skills).

 

She's a germaphobe with her fears being really dirty walls and seems to be a well organized person, though she's surprisingly lazy and procrastinates on anything that's not cleaning based.She's still a nice person but she's also got a sharp wit and a good sense of humor with being mischievous to boot, it makes her a funny person to be around in a good way.She's quite affectionate and caring with hints of consideration and cheerfulness but on the other hand she can be a bit of a coward and folds when she she thinks her aspirations won't go anywhere. (and all of this has developed on her own besides a few little nudges at the beginning to get her going in the right direction) It's not to say she hasn't ever been courageous before.

 

She really likes mountain dew and smells of mandarin oranges and berries. She's mostly warmer colors to me but her favorite colors are green, blue and purple. She's really quite soft and a little furry to the touch. I don't know how she would taste besides maybe fruit gushers but I'd rather not taste her.

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/22/13 - 1/26/13

 

She'd been quite fine and has expanded more on personality and sentience but she's also been a hassle, mostly because she likes going off and doing her own thing, she says she goes and sight-see's Olvea(the wonderland) but as of recently decided to try writing a book because she says all the books there are empty(as in there's nothing written in most if not all of them) as opposed to the lovely books out here and although she can access the information about those books she feels she needs something that originated around in the wonderland.

 

On the topic of wonderlands she can currently access Olvea and my dreams(lucid or not but she seems to not like talking about them because the ones I don't remember are just as crazy sometimes as the lucid dreams that I do have so there's no difference besides the lucid ones being more High definition). I've set down the rules so she can't run about freely in my mind and cause damage for the both of us(I'd hate her being scared off by a nightmare or gaining energy through some other mean and then try to overthrow me). And besides that she's not allowed to be in my daydreams to much but she doesn't seem to care because she says it's too horrid for headcannons(I do daydream about what if's on certain fandoms and I don't think she's fond of them).

 

We've been getting closer together and she says it's a pleasure to finally be able to communicate with me and does abide by the rules I've set up.Though she seriously wants to write a book, I'm not sure where that would lead but I doubt it would be that bad for the either of us, she seems set in writing fantasy novels.

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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1/26/13 - 1/30/13

Thess has worked on the book some more and has aslo been a positive influence, good progress because she seem's to be following most of the traits I set for her as little seed to start from(aka some stuff for her to go off of when she was just a little tulpa). I've gotten quite better at visualizing her and we have had some great tulpaforcing sessions as of late, but I need to do them more because they've been getting scarce.We have been doing a lot of back and fourth narration, which has improved her quite a bit but not as much as a full session.

 

She's also taken up a surname(last name). Her name is officially Theresa "Thess" Wilde. I'm so proud of how much progress she's made in a single month. Happy one month anniversary/birthday thess!

The causal tulpamancer.

Tulpa - Tess(Complete tulpa), Cora

 

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