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Making A Cutie Of My Own.


Welwitschia

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Hello~ My real name is Kayla, but you can call me Welwitschia or Witsch, whatever you please.

I'm an 18 year old girl from New York and I've known about tulpae for about two years. I'm still in high school because severe illness caused me to lose a year of school a while back. :c I like to sing, write, and play video games! I have an anxiety disorder and depression. I hope this doesn't affect my tulpa. This is going to be very disappointing, but I found out about tulpae from that creepypasta. I'm so sorry. But curiosity got me to research and research and end up where I am. Looming over the community...

Anyway. I tried once a little less than a year ago to create a tulpa. However, I gave up very quickly because I had a hard time concentrating. I attemped meditation as well as induced lucid dreaming. Know what happened? Nothing. It didn't help. And since my mind wandered so damn easily, I got annoyed and gave up. Never got even one sign of a tulpa.

I forgot about it even... I had a strange dream a while ago that somehow involved a "tulpa", and the memories came flooding back. I refreshed myself on the topic and I've decided to get back into it and be more serious.

 

Now, I've got a few tulpa "designs" in my mind... Not that I'll be forcing anything on them! I'm not yet sure if I want a "human" or not (no, no, no, not a pony!!). I have a boy in mind, but I also have what looks like a Ninfia/Sylveon (the Pokemon... I mean, it's better than Pinkie Pie or something). I guess that'll sort itself out in time? I don't have a name either, I'm leaving that entirely up to them, I think. Maybe they'll make something come to me?

 

Unfortunately I was sick today and couldn't get through my planned 30 minutes of forcing. However, I found it is a lot easier for me to visualize with my eyes open and while I am active. I could see much clearer in my mind the little Ninfia while I was cleaning around my apartment. It becomes difficult when I'm alone and still, even with music and meditation. Do you think it's possibly bad to force while doing things and having things going on in the world outside my mind?

 

I'm hoping to get through a good amount of forcing tomorrow. Plus there are at least two classes in school I can take a good 30-40 minutes forcing through, hahah.

I'll try to update this every day!

Today is 3/24/2014.

I can't wait to create a lovely friend~!

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Hm, at first I wanted to say that doing "daydreaming" forcing is fine as long as it works for you, but I kind of wonder how well you can actually focus on your thoughts. The problem is, as well as the point of relaxing and getting into a more proper meditative state of mind, is that you need to focus on the thoughtform, give it all your attention so you can listen to it better. That's how it is for people, generally, but there's no reason why it can't be the opposite for anyone. I'd say it's fine, go for it, but I'd also try to get in a quiet place and clear your thoughts as well, just for comparison sake.

 

I have anxiety issues and depression too (well it's bipolar but I get depressed sometimes is the point), it doesn't seem to affect mine, and she even tells me things that cheer me up. It's a pretty sweet deal.

 

Can't w8 for upd8s.

Scarlet - anime, 8/15/2012

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I don't think it's bad to force that way at all. It's just you won't have your complete attention available for the tulpa is all. I am kind of the opposite. I find it easiest to sit down and force, and then have a challenge keeping Seph in my mind while in the midst of other things. The answer is practice as far as I can tell. Doing something until it becomes routine makes it easier. Thanks for sharing Witsch.

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