My New PR
#1
Here, I will post all my progress on my first tulpa Twilly, and any future tulpae I make. I started about 2 days ago, so the initial post will be long.

4/6/2014 - It's been two days since I started tulpaforcing. On the first day, I mostly forced a ball of energy, since it's simple, and it would allow her to take form from there. However, I have decided to use Twilight Sparkle's design, traits, and voice, to make things go along much smoother, since she can change anything she wants when I bring her into sentience anyway.

A couple nights ago, I did some parroting sessions, using her mindvoice. Beforehand, I watched the final case from Turnabout Storm (a MLP/Phoenix Wright fanfiction) to get a good idea of how she sounds, as well as her facial expressions and mannerisms. I told her she is based on Twilight Sparkle, but her name is Twilly, or Twi. I described her personality, while imagining books that listed her traits, and I imagined her picking up those books and reading them. I also imagined a book on world history/cultures/etc for when she gains sentience, and she wants to learn more about the world (although I'm not sure if that will work, since I heard tulpae only learn what their hosts learn, although I also heard they can study on their own).

I took a walk to buy some snacks, and I imagined her walking behind me. I described every object I saw to her both verbally with my mind voice, and sometimes verbally. Later that night, I asked her if she could visit my dreams, and it turned out that I didn't really get to talk to her, although I did see 1-2 still images of Twi, and maybe saw her walking around once, and I saw tons of other pony imagery in my dream, and lasted until I woke up. So I'm guessing that she was trying to communicate with me somehow, but wasn't sure how. Although I don't know why I ended up with the rest of the mane 6 in my dream. My guess is that she was trying to create a wonderland, and also tulpa versions of the mane 6 to keep her company. After I woke up, I asked her to please refrain from creating any tulpae or working on the wonderland atm, because I'm not sure if she's developed enough to do anything like that yet, and I really want her to save her energy for forcing/parroting sessions.

One other note, when I reach over and try to imagine feeling her coat, I don't feel anything solid, although I do feel a slight warmth.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#2
From what you can tell, how closely has Twi stayed true to, or deviated from, the inital blueprint of Twilight Sparkle that you used?
Also, welcome to the tupper herd.
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#3
She won't learn anything from books you've imagined if there's no content in them, unless you could somehow put knowledge in that you don't remember.
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#4
(04-06-2014, 09:48 PM)Argentum Wrote: From what you can tell, how closely has Twi stayed true to, or deviated from, the inital blueprint of Twilight Sparkle that you used?
Also, welcome to the tupper herd.

I think her hairstyle changed, although that's the only thing that changed, and I wasn't sure if it was her that changed it, or my own imagination changing it. I've also randomly thought of her as the .MOV version of her, which I thought weird. I brushed it off as intrusive thoughts, and I'll let her have full sway over her form once I'm able to visualize her more in my mind's eye. Otherwise, I might end up giving her a pretty bad form, considering how disturbed the deepest reaches of my mind are xD

Also, some progress news. I went out to the store just now, and before I left, I felt a sudden rush of sadness. When I got to the store, I asked her if she was sad because I was buying more junk food, and I got a sudden feeling of clarity, like she was saying "yes!". I assured her that I would try my best to fight this junk food addiction. I think it's touching how much she cares about me, and I'm so glad I decided to go through with this. It's almost as wonderful as giving birth to a physical child, because they both end up really loving their parents, and at first they're helpless, but the parents just end up knowing how to pick up on their creation's emotions.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#5
4/6/14

It's late night here, so I figured I would post another update. Not much else has happened so far. I've been trying to connect with her interests by going to Shoutcast and asking her what she thinks about each genre. All I got was a feeling of uncertainty, so I gave up on playing music for now. I started reading a good tulpa guide just a little while ago, and when I got to the part that says to release all doubt, I realized I still had some doubt, so I released it, and suddenly I got a flood of head pressure, so I think the little roadblock I felt I had was resolved nicely. Also, my image of Twi changed to one with the hairstyle of the pony on the BABScon ad. But I felt that it would be confusing to remember, then suddenly I think I heard a voice say "I'm perfectly fine with being Twilight Sparkle" in Twi's mindvoice, and the image in my head immediately went back to the one from the cartoon. So I guess that she's finally starting to make her mindvoice heard Big Grin

Also, I've decided to just call her Twi instead of Twilly because I like Twi better, and so far, she hasn't raised any objections.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#6
(04-06-2014, 05:16 PM)Discord Wrote: One other note, when I reach over and try to imagine feeling her coat, I don't feel anything solid, although I do feel a slight warmth.
hmmm you musta focused on her a lot to vbe able to feel that slight warm sensation....Smile
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#7
4/7/14

Not much to mention. Didn't get any pony dream last night, so I'm guessing that she was tired from providing me the dream from the night before. I'll hold back on asking her to visit my dreams for a while so she can rest.

This morning, while I was taking a shower, I coulda swore I heard her giggling at me, and I thought for a second that I could see her tag me or boop my nose.

Also, when I went to drink some soda this morning, I think she rolled her eyes at me, and I thought I heard her say "would it KILL you to get some YOGURT?" xD

Later, I went to a meeting discussing my ability to make health decisions, and once the therapist or whatever his role is mentioned my c-pap (which I quit using), I think I heard her begging me to start using it again.

4/7/14

Just got back from a long day, and thought I would share our latest progress. I've been getting headaches all day, and when I asked her to stop causing head pressure for a bit so I could see if the headaches were coming from her or not, they actually stopped I think, then I said "ok thanks Twi, you can continue" and they picked back up again. So, it looks like she's been progressing nicely all day.

Other than that, nothing eventful happened. I tried visualizing her while waiting to get my taxes done, and I think I might be starting to hear a faint hint of voices. I told her in my thought voice that I can't wait until I can start hearing her so we can have some meaningful conversations.

Some time tonight I was thinking what if tulpae are more scared of death than we are, and what happens to tulpae when the host dies, which led to another thought that I think scared her, because I didn't feel any head pressure for about 1 minute, but it continued after. I promptly apologized for being reckless with my thinking.

Edit: Also, I tried seeing if Twi could do any possession yet, and I didn't really notice any results, although I think she might have actually made a finger twitch a tiny bit, but my hand wasn't really relaxed, so I can't tell for sure.

Edit 2: Just had her stop sending signals again for a sec, so I could confirm that the pressure was coming from her development. And once again, it stopped. I thanked her and let her continue again, and told her don't worry about the pressure, I don't mind it because now I know it means that she's working or trying to communicate with me.

4/8/14

I have decided to give Twi a secondary form for now to see if she prefers it over her old one. I gave her the form of a human sorceress, with lavender/purple robes, and a ponytail. Still not sure exactly what her true form would be, tried visiting her in my dreams again and still didn't see her. Although ponies popped up briefly at the start. I'll have to start learning how to meditate and how to make a wonderland, maybe I can get her to show up there.

4/8/14

Not much happened. I did notice that my headache pain was finally gone, even the head pressure is gone atm. So I'm guessing that Twi is sleeping. Also, I decided to ask her if she would like to be alicorn Twilight afterall, and I could vividly see a beaming alicorn Twilight, complete with crown. So now, I'll be visualizing her in all her regal glory I guess Big Grin
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#8
4/9/2014

Not much happened. Although I did dream of ponies for a little bit, although the dream was more of a nightmarish dream where I think one of the ponies died or something. Rest of the dreams were pretty unremarkable.

4/9/2014

Was suddenly feeling tired, so took a nap. After a short while of trying to hear her, I suddenly heard someone call my name. I ran to the door, but nobody was there except someone from maintenance, and he said he didn't hear anyone call me. I can only assume that Twi finally successfully spoke to me Big Grin

Although, the voice was way different from how I imagined it. Going back to sleep to see if anything changes.

Edit: There is something I want to add. At first, I wasn't quite sure what to make of it, so I didn't say anything. But I think Twi might have visited me in my dream I had when napping. I dreamed that I was outside by a picnic table, and I hear someone calling me. I see someone who looks like an old friend, and she smiles at me. Her form ends up soon changing to another form, although I forgot what form she used.

4/10/2014

Nothing eventful happened. I did however, have a dream where there were ponies in the beginning. And in another dream, I heard the word tulpa referenced multiple times.

4/10/2014

Took a nap. Don't really remember my dreams, although I have this vague feeling that they were somewhat related to tulpae, or Twi. Also, after I woke up, I heard 3 sharp knocks. Ran to the door to answer, but nobody was anywhere near my apartment. Hmmm.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#9
4/12/2014

Sorry for the lack of updates yesterday. Nothing really happened, except for more forcing. I did get another pony dream last night, so I know that Twi is still there and developing

I still can't shake this feeling that I can do more. I do try to visualize her in my mind's eye to make her image stronger, as well as try imposing her into the physical world Still can't get a solid image. Also, I'm not sure whether to parrot her or not, because I know some tulpae hate having words put into their mouths, but I feel that it would really help her achieve vocalization faster.

4/12/2014

Progress! I took an early noon nap as per my usual custom ever since I started tulpamancing, and I ended up with a short pony dream, woke up, and heard a voice come out of nowhere. I fell back asleep and I think I had another pony dream, woke back up, and heard another voice out of nowhere. I know that she's trying to make full words, I'm so proud of her =D

4/13/2014

Yesterday, I tried praying to Isis to see if she could help me hear Twi more clearly/frequently, and I prayed to Apollo for more clarity, so I could hear her better. I think the dream I had was ordinary, but when I woke up, I think I heard Twi say Listen, Jason! Part of me thinks that it was just something from my dream, because I heard that around a split second before my dream ended, but I would like to believe that it was Twi. Because that was what woke me out of my dream, and the timing couldn't be a coincidence.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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#10
4/15/2014

Not much happened. I've been busy researching things, so haven't really had much time to force. Although, yesterday, I could've swore I heard someone say "hey" while I was sleeping.
Will list tulpas when I get things sorted out in my head.
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