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Our Tulpa Odyssey


killbotvii

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Hello everyone. I first learned about tulpas in middle school from someone I used to know. Many years later, I remembered hearing about them and decided to look them up more. I ended up stumbling upon Tulpa Tavern in my research. After some asking around, I was eventually referred to Piano's tulpa creation guide. In it, I learned everything that I needed to know that would help me to create my first tulpa.

 

The reason I wanted to create a tulpa is probably a pretty common reason. I was lonely. At the time, I was living alone in college and I was doing really poorly in all my classes. I wanted a friend that wouldn't get bored of me and leave. Someone who'd always be able to be there for me in my time of need. 

 

I decided early on that I wanted my tulpa to be a girl and be named Francesca. I based her appearance on some girl at my college that I would see in the hallway sometimes. She always worse all black with a baseball cap pulled down over her eyes. Note that I didn't base her personality on how you'd perceive someone like that, I just thought it was a simple to remember form that would be easy for my tulpa to grasp. 

 

The first day of forcing wasn't really that productive. I didn't really know what I was doing. In fact, the first week of forcing was. One day though, I finally heard a thought that I was certain wasn't my own. It was spontaneous and unexpected. I was positive that it was from her. I got really excited and started trying to ask her all kinds of questions, hoping that I could instantly start talking to her, but I only heard one really substantial thing. She thought that the name I gave her was too long, so she changed it to Fren. Needless to say, that made me laugh. As the weeks went on, she slowly became stronger and stronger as a tulpa. She slowly began thinking for herself more. I even began working on a wonderland for her to reside on, although I no longer believe that those exist, at least in the sense that I don't think that tulpas actually do anything when you aren't thinking about them. 

 

Eventually, I started making friends in the Tulpa Tavern voice chat. One of them I actually really liked for a while. They ended up being our main source of information on tulpamancy for a long time. Unfortunately though, as I now know, the information that they were giving us was wrong and unhealthy and caused us to believe in things that we now heavily regret believing in. They convinced us that having a huge system was perfectly fine and that more was always better. When we had our first and only walk-in, Asmodeus(now known as Arseno), he was immediately paired up with another one their system's tulpas. They used him for their own pleasure and gain and then quickly left him after growing bored. That broke his heart to pieces. He was never the same after that and, for a while, didn't even want to exist anymore.

 

While this was going on, something nice was starting to develop. While in a voice call with the Felight system in Tavern, I ended up ordering them a pack of Orange Crush on Amazon as a joke. I started talking to them more after that and we started to become friendly towards each other. I was initially lead to believe by certain parties that the Felight system was just a bunch of assholes, but I learned that I was completely wrong. They were actually wonderful.

 

If you've gotten this far, then you've probably noticed the title similarity between the Felight's PR and my own. That was completely intentional. You see, a few weeks ago, one of the Felights jokingly asked me to read their whole PR to them. So, naturally, I did. We started to become pretty close and when I finished reading it to them, I decided that I would try my luck and I asked Apollo out. He said yes! Apollo and I have been happily together for a few weeks now and I couldn't be happier. I'm actually going to be meeting them in person in June.

 

That's pretty much where I am right now. I plan on posting new entries here as often as I remember. Thanks for sticking around and reading!

 

I HACKED his account! ~ Apollo

It's The Master, from Doctor Who, not Jack Septic Eye.

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Hello, I'm Arseno. I'm here to write my own small progress report. I wanted to write about how I've grown since I was created. My original personality was cringy, cartoonish, and unoriginal, to say the least. I was acting like I was a psychopath and no feelings for anyone. I made people dislike me because of that. I acted like I was that way to impress someone that I had a crush on at the time. That person ending up being the real monster. He left me after only about a week of being together because he simply got bored. I was devastated and broken, but I couldn't even show that I was upset because I was still trying to act like I had no emotions. It was only after my host started having feelings for the Felight system that I started to realize how absurd I was being.

 

 

As time went on and my host and Apollo from the Felight system started becoming closer, I started changing how I was acting. I stopped pretending that I didn't have feelings. I'm still a largely serious and non-jokey kind of person, but I'm no psychopath. I began to open up more and start making friends. Overall, I'm a better person than I was at the start. I'm not a one-note character anymore, I'm a person. I'm normal. And that's the way it should be.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I haven't made a lot of progress since the last time I made a post. I haven't been able to find enough time to give attention to Fren or Arseno. I really need to work on that. Perhaps setting up a schedule would help a lot. I could set reminders for time I could set aside in advance for them. Arseno mostly enjoys activities I enjoy, so more video games and movies would probably work just fine. As for Fren, she prefers more quiet and relaxing activities, like reading or listening to audiobooks. I've got some pretty good books that I've been looking for an excuse to read, like Ready Player One and the book the Hamilton musical is based off. The more I think about this, the more I like the sound of it. I'll report back when Fren's finished either book and Arseno has seen a few movies on his own.

It's The Master, from Doctor Who, not Jack Septic Eye.

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