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Pancakes and Mymao's Progress Report


Pancakes

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Salut, everyone!

 

I posted in the introductory thread, but for anyone who hasn't seen that and is interest: My name is Pancakes, you can call me Pancakes or Pan, either is fine. I joined up here because I was interested in creating my own Tulpa after having done an exorbitant amount of reading regarding the whole thing. I don't really need the companionship, considering I have a loving life partner, and a pretty satisfactory life. However, I'm the only creative person in my immediate group of social contacts, given most of my artist friends moved on after college --- so I thought it'd be nice to start this process with an idea in mind of a creative companion --- someone I can discuss a variety of things with, obviously, but who maybe fills the gap in my social life of having someone to talk to about creative and technical things (like illustration theory).

 

That being said, I found that I pretty much already had something of a vague Tulpa already when I sat down and started the whole process in the ways that felt comfortable for me. You can read all about that below in Day 1, if you're interested. o3o I thought it was pretty funny.

 

I'm going to try and update this as frequently as possible. c: If you have any questions or comments about what I'm writing here, or just want to chat, feel free to message me or post here. I'm cool with either.

 

Day 1 - 06/29/2015

 

I had decided last night that I was going to go through the process of creating a Tulpa, after having spent some time considering it, and what my overall opinion was on the subject. Even with that, I still spent the better half of the day considering whether this was really something I wanted to spend time doing --- given the personal time invested, and the mental energy, etc. I've been down this road before, sort of, so I more or less had an idea of what I'd be getting myself into. Ultimately, I came to the conclusion that I was taking the leap. So, here I am, writing this based on my experiences today.

 

For me, it's easiest to begin imagining something if I have a clear image of what it is I'm trying to imagine. It helps me gather my bearings when I have an end goal, even if the end goal is vague and malleable. I know that I want a creative companion --- someone who likes to talk about art, and who inspires me, who I can inspire, and share a love of imaginative thought with. For that reason, I decided to start by visualizing a form that does inspire me creatively --- a Betelgeusian from Space Dandy. Not specifically this character, but just this species and general shape.

 

I sat with this form for a little bit, and started to write down aspects of this Tulpa's personality --- and what I found is that this Tulpa has more or less existed in some form for a while. I used to practice a different form of thought companionship, and had a vague thought companion for a while (with a constantly changing, or usually non-existent, form. Having conversations with my subconscious isn't really a new phenomenon for me --- actually, this whole beginning process felt like reacquainting myself with an old friend who I hadn't seen for a while, and who was just happy to see me). As I wrote down aspects of this Tulpa's personality, it felt familiar enough to me that I was pretty sure I'd been over this before with this Tulpa. He's outgoing and sociable. He's a little pushy, but he means well - he wants to be productive, and part of the way he does that is by nudging things along and being a little demanding. He's snarky and humorous --- sometimes he speaks a little harshly, or makes light of things, but that's just him trying to keep the mood light. He's an eternal optimist, and he'd much rather avoid the darker subjects of life if there's a way to do so. He loves science fiction --- and we ended up spending time thinking about some of the things we like about science fiction --- namely space ships. Oooh, space ships are cool --- and it was through that that we established that Wonderland was the interior of our very own spaceship, which we called Ol' Rosie.

 

We didn't venture too far into Wonderland. We mainly spent some time relaxing in our new chairs, taking in the interior console, the floating holographic screens, the silly shag rug in the center of the floor. Things sort of materialized slowly as they were imagined --- like an elaborate day dream. It started out pretty empty, but gradually became pretty messy and full of life and character. It started to feel more like a home interior inside of this space ship, as opposed to a sterile environment. Overall, I think we were both pretty content to just accept it as it was, and to accept this interaction as whatever it was ---- if it was just me imagining it, that was cool with us, we'd work on it later. The important thing was that we had a cool place to hang out, and had more or less become reacquainted with each other --- which is funny, because I started this whole process thinking I was going to be starting from scratch, not reacquainting myself with an old friend who I haven't talked to, or really thought about, in years.

 

The last thing we really talked about before going on to do our own separate things, because, as he put it "you've got work to do, so go work, dammit", was about his name. He thought it was funny that I wanted to talk about that like it was important, given he's been called at least a dozen things in the past when he was called something other than a "Tulpa". I thought that was pretty funny too. Ultimately, I decided to name him Mymao (Mai-Mow).

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