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Personality and Form Deviation


Wemmy

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Hello everyone,

Ever since I begun working on my tulpa's personality and form and what not, I felt pressured to pick traits I felt realistic and that appealed to me. However, I realize that tulpas, once fully sentient, are likely to deviate form-wise and personality-wise. Perhaps some of us have moral hangups or indifference to the subject of personality forcing, so views and amounts of personality forcing vary between systems. I'm curious as to how tulpas and hosts feel about this, how much deviation they saw or went through, and how they feel about that as well as why they believe it happened.

Please share your experiences and do not be afraid to go on a tangent or two, as information is good!

Cheers!

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Old post of mine from a long time ago:

 

There's always a fine line when it comes to this subject that I can't quite pin down. Some peoples' tulpas change wildly at least early on, some stay exactly the same, most change a little bit over time or just once. But I know for absolute certain that most tulpas who change a ton are those of hosts who go in completely afraid to affect their tulpas in any way, and I honestly believe instead of giving their tulpas freedom they subject them to random fits of imagination. There's no problem with giving your tulpa a form and waiting until they're sentient to let them decide if they want to change.

 

That being said, my tulpas haven't changed at all since their original conception, by me, with really no choice of their own. They were the Touhou characters' forms, neither I nor them ever thought about them being something different. And they've had no problem at all with that in seven years. It's like asking somebody if they'd like to change the name they grew up with. Most of the time they're going to say no, because they've become attached to it. Sometimes though they'll say, well, I would change my middle name, or something like that. Small changes are pretty common for tulpas later on. Flandre generally speaking does not have the crystal wings anymore as they were a burden to imagine in the wonderland and imposition. She still identifies with pictures of her with them, though. My tulpas' "forms" have all grown a bit taller over time, too. But none of that was out of dissatisfaction, or even conscious desire on my part. They simply happened as they were easier or felt more natural. None of them ever had a problem with their forms, because they're just attached to them. Unless some part of it is a problem, like huge wings that get in the way all the time, there's not much reason to want to change.

 

And I'm pretty sure it's the host that influences that in a tulpa. Because most people go in with the mindset that they'll give their tulpa a form and it can make changes if it wants later, likely small ones. Some people basically say "Well I'll imagine you as a guy my age for now. But you can totally become a small female of a different ethnicity if you want...", and those are generally the tulpas that change the most. And of course, there's the hosts that just can't settle on a form and make a ball of light/shapeshifting tulpa, and we all know how that usually goes. I've met my share of lion fairy wisps.

 

But I didn't think any of that. My "tulpas" were just what they were, sentient imaginary friends based on Touhou characters. I never thought at all about them changing, because why would I have? Why would Flandre ever not look like Flandre, or change her name? It wasn't that I restricted my tulpas from ever changing.. Change just never occurred to me as an option. And thus, they never wanted to. I've asked them about it recently and even Tewi, whose form arguably fits her the least, says she's attached to it. Even though she could be taken more seriously with a different appearance, she keeps the bunny ears and pink dress, because that's part of who she is. In her own words, too.

 

So I think you should go with whatever you're most comfortable with. Don't be afraid of "accidentally forcing your tulpa to be something they don't want to", because that can't happen. If you really like the idea of a certain form, then go ahead and use it. Chances are if you like it and are comfortable with it, your tulpa won't feel like changing it either. Small adjustments later on generally seems to be the most common practice, and I think that makes the tulpa and host happiest. Because I honestly feel like some people have let their imagination change their tulpa from something reasonable into something ridiculous, and then kept that form because they were afraid to "force their tulpa" to be something they didn't want to be. And those tulpas usually couldn't even talk yet...

 

 

In case my talk about how my tulpas never thought about changing themselves bugged any of you, I should mention that I created them many years before discovering tulpas. Heck, I created them before tulpas were a thing, online anyway. But I did keep that in mind when I created my fourth tulpa years later, Lucilyn. Whose form was based on the Touhou character Suwako. Except I gave her creative freedom with everything about herself, and gave her my own name like I would a child. She still opted to keep the form I gave her because I liked it and she liked what I saw in the character for herself. She's changed the colors of her clothes and seems to like how she looks without the hat too, so I see her with it maybe 50% of the time. But given that, I think that my comfortableness with my tulpas' forms, combined with the positive traits I tend to see in them that inspired making a tulpa in the first place, generally leads them to be comfortable with their given forms. They just don't see reason to change when they understand why I like how they are and agree. However, now that I think about it, this may not be the case for all systems. My tulpas, even seven years ago, have always been completely borderless with my mind and theirs. We understand every single feeling and thought another has because of that. For systems where this isn't the case and minds and feelings are more separate, it's possible a tulpa may be less inclined to keep a form their host likes as the tulpa doesn't experience the same feelings the host does on it. So...

 

Basically, give'em a form you like, force them until they're relatively sentient/vocal, and then ask if they'd like to be different. Can't go wrong like that.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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