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Personality Forcing, Narration, First Week Actively Forcing
#1
Right so I've known about tulpas for quite a while but I haven't exactly gone through with actually trying to meditate and actually actively forcing with one, so everyone say hi to Aaro...

Okay yeah no of course I don't have a fully developed tulpa after just one week, but that's besides the point. Anyways, after tons of research on guide upon guide, I decided to actually sit down on my ass and started sort of getting a general idea for my tulpa's personality. While I know my tulpa's personality will probably change a lot over the course of time, I just decided to spend 6 hours in total just skrt of getting a baseline as to who Aaro would be to begin with. Again, I know that will change and I'm willing to let it.

Alright so I tried personality forcing, etc. etc., but then I realized that after a while I was just kind of repeating myself, like I think at that point I got a good idea of who my tulpa already was. I started feeling like something was already missing, even after I spent a good time after just meditating on Aaro's personality, I realized that I couldn't just simply think of him part time, I had to actually feel like I was spending time with him all the time. I realized I hsd to actually feel like he was ALWAYS there, not just when I sat my ass down and meditated. So instead, whenever I was watching TV, listening to music, reading, I knew why passive forcing was so important, because it kept the tulpa's presence in check... Which is why I just started narration a few days ago.

But heah I'd say as soon as I started actually talking as if I was actually talking to Aaro, all those feelings that something was missing had disappeared. I also started noticing some head pressures around the middle of this week so that might be a good sign I'm on the right tract, but I assume that might just be some other factor like lack of water or something, so I'm not too sure.

I also began a bit of visualization today, which, I'd say went alright. I didn't really feel like I was there in my wonderland (which, at the moment is just a tiny apartment) but I do think I could actually memorize the detail of the apartment and I could sort of see it and my tulpa, but not like at the back of my eyelids, but more like as if I just took the image in my head and just sort of moved it down and made it bigger. I know I probably shouldn't be too worried about visualization this early on in the process but really I just wanted to just sort of try it out.

Over all though, I'd say not much has happened in the first week, but honestly, I wasn't really expecting much to occur anyways. I just kind of wanted to get to the point in this progress report because, as I said, not much has really happened, but I'll say if anything happens at the end of next week, but for now we'll just have to wait and see. I'd say this week was more experimental, so I suppose we'll see what happens.
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